I will give you a small warning.

Brace yourselves.

Issac's POV

Hazel's funeral was horrible. As if going to Augustus's funeral wasn't bad enough, at least we had some warning! And we had been allowed to rehearse before he died! Hazel's death was so unexpected. Well, actually, it was expected she would die one day, but so soon? No one had expected that. There was nothing left I could break either, since most breakable things I had were taken out of my room after my surgery. So I resorted to angrily ripping up paper instead when I was told Hazel had died.

And now I sat, with my mom on one side and someone else who I don't know on the other side. I don't listen to what the other people say. They aren't important enough to me. Then my mom helps me get up to say stuff, and I'm kind of glad I can't see all the crying faces that are without a doubt in front of me. It makes it easier. I'm not sure what I said, it was probably something along the lines of "Hazel and Augustus, those bastards, left me here to go on some trip again. Those greedy little sh*ts.

I only guess that's what I said because I think I heard a few quiet laughs and my mom smacked my arm a little and told me to watch my mouth. I told her I couldn't watch anything, and that ended that. The whole time, I expected to hear Marissa or Joseph. They were her friends too, weren't they? I know they knew what had happened, because my mom was the one who called them. So where were they?

I found out a few days later why Marissa and Joseph weren't there. I was at another Support Group meeting (UGH), and heard someone sit next to me. Just as the normal beginnings started, the person next to me, who I found out as soon as I heard her voice, spoke up.

"Joseph is sick." Marissa sniffled. "He got sick in the car a few days ago and he passed out, and he just woke up yesterday and they don't know whats wrong with him."

I swear I could hear the tears fall from her eyes. No wonder they weren't at Hazel's funeral. Joseph was in the hospital again, and Marissa must've stayed with him. I reached a hand over and felt around in the air until I found her shoulder.

"He'll get better. You know he will." I told her, wishing I could promise that he'd come out of it. I jumped in surprise when I felt her lunge at me and cling to me and cry on my shirt. What was this? I'm not the one people go to for comfort. I'm no good at that whole comforting thing. And yet here she was, crying on me like I'm her brother.

When I went home that night, I asked my mom if she knew anything. All the moms from the group talked to each other. She didn't know much about it./

"His mom doesn't like to share much about Joseph's health. All I know is that he was rushed to the hospital the day of Hazel's funeral, and hasn't been allowed to have any visitors."

That was basically all I could get out of anyone. I didn't know anything more until next week, when Marissa wasn't at the meeting. That was strange enough as it was. And then Patrick pulled me aside after the meeting.

"You're friends with Joseph, right?" He asked.

"Yeah..." I nodded.

"Well, his mom asked if I could tell any of his friends to go see him in the hospital. They don't think he'll be getting any better this time."

I didn't explain anything to my mom when she came to get me. I simply told her we had to go to the hospital Joseph was in and that it was an emergency and couldn't wait. If Joseph was dying, I wanted to make sure I said good bye this time.

3rd Person POV

For the past few days Joseph had been extremely unstable. He would hallucinate and grow violent, and then become frightened and scared and sometimes simply becoming completely unresponsive. He spent most of his day highly medicated to ease the pain and keep the hallucinations away. Whenever this medication would wear off, he would become aware and 'awake' again for about 30 minutes before the crippling migraines would start and he would be reduced to tears from the pain. He was very weak, and couldn't move on his own, unless he was hallucinating and having a fit. Otherwise, he was almost paralyzed. He had no control over his body parts. Sometimes, his arm or hand would move on it's own and he wouldn't notice. This was because the cancer had attacked the part of his brain that sent messages to his nerves to tell his limbs were to go.

They kept him restrained to the bed, because if he were to enter a hallucination and throw a fit, he risked hurting himself and anyone around him. That was the only time he seemed able to aim and control his movements, and the doctors believed this was because of the adrenaline he would feel. Joseph could no longer hold down solid food, and could do nothing on his own. He wasn't allowed to leave his room because his immune system was weakened so much, that even the smallest little germ could infect him and he wasn't strong enough to fight off any illnesses. He was being kept alive almost entirely by machines. For the first few days, he was too disoriented to really understand what was happening. He was only aware for about 3 hours a day. After a few days of sitting in the hospital, Joseph accepted that he wasn't going to recover this time. He had already lived way longer than he should've, and he's cheated death countless times. He told his mom and doctors what he wanted: he wanted to see his few friends and family one last time, and then when the medication put him to sleep, he wanted them to pull the plug.

He had thought about maybe telling them to stop the medicine and he would die without any of it in his system. But he didn't want to go in pain. He wanted it to be peaceful and quiet and without his head throbbing. He had dealt with it all enough by now. No one could tell him that dying while medicated wasn't the right way to go; no, maybe it was 'proper' to them, but it meant he would have his last few hours on Earth without pain. They had reluctantly agreed. Joseph was relieved. His biggest regrets would not being able to be there as Marissa grew up. But at least with him gone, his mother would have a better chance at life. And maybe they could use Joseph's cancer story to study more about brain cancer.

His room was kept dark, with the blinds always closed and the only light for the most part being a little nightlight in the corner and whatever buttons on the machines that lit up. The temperature was kept even, and his doctors did their best to now wear bright colors in his room. People were told that if they wanted to send flowers, to send flowers will very faint or no smell. Anything that could possibly make his head throb less and keep him as comfortable as possible.

All day, random people who knew Joseph came in and out. Old nurses, past doctors, the people who attempted to be his teacher for a while, lots of people. But when Marissa was supposed to come in, she didn't. Her mother did./div

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"Where's Marissa?" Joseph asked, automatically thinking the worst.

"She's alright, don't worry." She assured him quickly. "She came home from the support group meeting and has a fever."

"So?"

"She's sick. The doctors say it's not good idea to bring anyone who's sick to see you."

"I don't care what the doctors say! I'm dying anyway. I want to see her." Joseph insisted.

"Alright, relax. I'll go get her." Jane put her hands up in surrender. She stood up and kissed his forehead, eyes watering. "You know I love you like my own son, right? You've helped Marissa so much these past few months. You're a good kid. Keeping watching over her, okay?"

"I promise I will." Joseph nodded, and Jane left, heading out to go pick up Marissa. A few minutes later, someone else walked in, being guided by a nurse. Issac. He could remember his name now, of course right as he was ready to go. The nurse helped Issac find a chair, and then she left, looking at Joseph once as if to make sure he was still awake. He hadn't stayed awake for this long since he got here.

"When are you coming back?" Issac asked, his voice sounding different, tight almost. He had just recently lost one of his best friends. Was Joseph considered a close friend to him? Maybe. Surely he had to be more than just another cancer patient if Issac had actually come down to see him, right?

"I'm not." Joseph answered quietly. Now that Issac was here, Joseph wasn't entirely sure what to say. His 'family' had been easy. They had done most of the talking, not him. "I've served my time."

"But-"

"Don't try to tell me otherwise. Please." Joseph stopped him. "I want you to do me a favor."

Issac sighed in defeat. He had enough experience in this to know when it was time to stop arguing. He was sure plenty of people before him had tried to convince Joseph otherwise, and it simply wasn't going to work. "Anything."

"Will you take care of Marissa for me? I'm afraid she won't take my death very well. I've been there her whole life. When I'm gone, I'm afraid she'll give up and stop trying."

"I can try, but I don't know how I'll be much help. I'm not very useful in caring for others."

"Help her learn to walk. Talk to her. Just make sure she's okay." Joseph wanted to do something with his hands, roll a piece of paper around under his fingers, something other than lay still. But he wasn't strong enough to that. "Maybe she can play those blind person video games with you. She can handle loud noises a lot better than I would've."

"Stop talking in past tense." Did Issac's voice just crack?

"Can you do that for me though? Take care of her?" Joseph watched his blind friend.

"Yeah. I can do that." Issac reached forward and felt around for a few minutes. His hands paused over the restraint.

"They restrained you?" He asked quietly, as if it were a secret.

"I...I hallucinate. I get violent. It's the safest thing for everyone if I stay strapped down. Both my wrists and ankles are strapped down." Joseph sighed. He was getting tired now, and the pain was starting up. No doubt it was almost over for him.

Issac didn't seem to know how to respond to that. It wasn't something to really be discussed, but how could he change the subject after hearing that?

"I'm sorry I missed Hazel's funeral." Joseph said before Issac could think of anything.

"Don't apologize. It wasn't your fault you missed it. It wasn't too fun anyway." /

"You know, when I had that seizure around the time Marissa got her surgery, I...I think I could hear you two. It's hard to explain, but even though I couldn't move or see, I remember hearing voices talking to me. My mom said you and Hazel were there everyday."

"We were. If one of us couldn't make it, the other would go."

"I don't remember what you guys said to me. But thank you. I thought I was going to get lost in the darkness."

"Well, my whole world is dark. You get used to it eventually." Issac shrugged. Joseph half smiled.

"There is one thing I remember hearing though." He continued after a few minutes of silence. "Someone kept mentioning infinity. Something about numbers and oblivion and the unavoidable."

Issac smiled sadly. "That would be Hazel. Her and Augustus would go on constantly about it. It was almost annoying."

Joseph nodded, not really registering that Issac wouldn't know he nodded. The looked up as the door opened, and Marissa came in. She still had that odd limp of someone who wasn't used to their own legs, but she had gotten better at it. Her eyes wandered the room until they landed on him and she waddled as fast as she could over to him, clambering onto his bed and hugging him. He wanted to hug her back, but he wouldn't risk asking doctors to take the restraints off. He wouldn't risk possibly hurting her.

"I'll uh...I guess I'll see you later.." Issac said, having heard Marissa come in and assuming that Joseph would want some time alone with her.

"Thank you, Issac." Joseph smiled sadly. "You've really helped me."

Issac couldn't bring himself to say anything in response to that, so he waved in the direction Joseph's voice had come from before he was escorted out of the room.

Joey?" Marissa's voice was small and quiet, not like her normal, happy tone she normally used.

"Yes, Marissa?" Joseph tried to keep his voice as normal as possible.

"Mommy says you're moving. She says you're going someplace really nice that always warm and sunny and that they're going to take away your head aches, but that I can't go with you. Why can't I come?"

"Because you need to stay here and help the bigger kids at the support group, remember?" Joseph could feel his throat tightening, but he ignored it. "You promised them you would help them, even when you got your toes off."

"Can I come visit you though?"

Joseph was finding it hard to find words to say in response to her. She was so innocent. Maybe he shouldn't have had her come. Maybe it would've been easier for both of them if they didn't see each other this last time.

"No, but I'll come visit you sometimes. You probably won't see me, but I'll be there."

"How will I know?"

"You just will."

No, this was right. He needed to see her again and he couldn't let her last image of him be the episode he had in the car. She needed to see him talking normally again, one last time. That would do the least amount of damage, right? He could feel the medicine starting to make him tired. It was almost over.

"Joseph?" Marissa asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Hm?" Joseph rested his chin on her head as she hugged him, holding her head to his chest.

"You're the best brother ever." She said confidently. "I love you infinity much."

A tear slid down Joseph's face, and he couldn't do anything to stop it. Something about a child's innocence at a time of a death was powerful, enough to snap the hardest shells people build around themselves.

"I love you too, Marissa." He said quietly, hoping his voice wouldn't betray him. He could feel himself beginning to fall asleep, but he didn't fight it. He could go now.

Jane came back in to get Marissa. A little girl did not have to hear her brother's heart monitor straight line. She lead Marissa out and brought her to the waiting room. A nurse had gone to get paint colors so Marissa could put her hand on the wall.

Meanwhile, Joseph's mom sat down on the bed next to him, and she scooped him into her arms for one last time. Her head resting against his, she clenched her eyes shut as the doctors pulled the plug. A long, steady beep filled the room before they turned the machine off. Anyone in the room could've sworn they saw relief on Joseph's face as the plug was pulled, and a childlike innocence he hadn't had in years overcame his whole body. It was finally over.

Epilogue? Maybe?