So this is my favorite chapter, I think - or, rather, this and chapter 12 together are my favorites so far (and I'm in the middle of writing chapter 15 right now). Hopefully you all enjoy this and next week's chapter as much as I have!

MANY thanks to my beta RainbowSerenity, as always. I told her this week how long I'm planning to have this story go (I'm set up for a trilogy) and she's still sticking with me, so yay! :D And MANY thanks to all of you who send reviews, feedback, PMs, likes, follows, favorites, reblogs, whatever - knowing how many of you are enjoying the story makes my life. I cannot thank you all enough. :)

This chapter and the next chapter, because they're SO DAMN LONG, will be posted in text form on FFnet only. These will (I think) be the only two chapters to do this, because the poor mobile users (I'm one of them) on tumblr don't have the benefit of the read more function. It is very easy to read on here with or without an account from mobile, though (I've done it a lot), so everybody should be good to go! :)

And now I'll shut up so you guys can read.


Chapter XI: The Luckiest(?)

Snow stopped the car just behind Bartholomew's, less than a block down from the restaurant where Serah had arranged to meet Sazh and Dajh. Bartholomew was already out in front of the restaurant shaking hands with Sazh while the youngest Katzroy zoomed around them with a toy biplane. Snow grinned at the two women in the backseat through the rearview mirror, gave them his signature thumbs-up, and exited the car to greet his old friend. Serah, meanwhile, reached over to give Estelle's hand a reassuring squeeze. The older woman barely registered the contact as she stared out the window at her family, her eyes glazed over with unshed tears.

"My baby… he's so big now…"

"Ready, Estelle?" Serah asked encouragingly. Estelle swallowed hard and nodded, so she opened the door and stepped out to wait for her friend to join her on the sidewalk. Once they were both out, she closed the door as quietly as she could so as not to draw attention since Estelle was already making her way, very slowly, towards the others.

"We took great care of the car for you, Dajh," Snow was telling the young boy as he rustled the puff of hair atop the child's head. Dajh laughed and swatted Snow's hand away.

"You're gonna mess it up, Snow," he complained.

"Ain't nobody alive who can do that to Dajh's hair and get away with it," Sazh chuckled. "Not even me."

Estelle, only ten feet or so away now, saw her chance and took it. "Am I still allowed, little man?"

All eyes snapped to her, including Serah's, who stood just behind her. For several seconds, no one moved, and Estelle felt her nerve slipping away from her. She was about to turn away when Dajh suddenly let his toy plane drop to the ground.

"Dad, isn't that… that's Mommy, isn't it?"

Sazh didn't answer as he stared right at Estelle, so intently it was as if he could see right through her. Serah rushed forward and knelt in front of the boy, speaking up quickly to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Yeah, Dajh, this is your mommy. Remember in class, you used to tell us how your dad gave you her picture and told you a different story about her every night?" Serah's heart broke as she heard Estelle bite back a sob. "Remember how you showed us the stuffed chocobo she made you when you were a baby?"

"Yeah," Dajh said with an air of uncertainty, clinging to Sazh's frozen leg. Serah extended her hand to him and smiled encouragingly as he took it. Dajh was still hesitant to go to Estelle, who had dropped to her knees upon seeing the doubt in her son's eyes. She had expected this or worse, but it didn't make being a stranger to her son any easier or any less painful. Estelle swallowed through the tightness in her throat and inhaled deeply through her nose as an idea came to her. With soul and sorrow equal, Estelle began to sing.

"Moon of old Cocoon,
The night is falling,
Moon of old Cocoon,
The wind is calling;

Rise above Pulsian seas,
Show how lovely you can be,
Sky has made a garden full of flowers,
White jasmine petal stars strewn in silver bowers;

Robes of cloud about the heavens flow,
While we await your golden glow…"

Serah's eyes welled up as the broken mother's voice sang words and a tune she last heard in carefree childhood days long since gone by. Moon of Old Cocoon had been one of her mother's favorite songs to sing to her and Lightning when they weren't even half Dajh's current age, and in all the years since, she had completely forgotten its gently lilting rhythm and lyrics which made little sense in the mind of a toddler.

While Estelle sang, Serah noticed Dajh had begun to hum along and she let go of his hand to allow him to continue edging towards his mother unencumbered. She wasn't sure if he even realized he was doing it. She had been right – Dajh may not have remembered her face, but he definitely remembered her voice.

"Do you remember that song, little man?" Estelle asked gently, holding out her hand to Dajh now that he was close enough to take it if he wanted to. "I used to sing it to you every night, even when I was in the hospital. Remember that?"

Dajh nodded slowly in response. "I remember the music parts, but I never could remember all the words," he said in the kind of matter-of-fact tone only a child could properly employ. "Dad tried to sing it to me a couple of times, but he couldn't remember all of them either. And he doesn't sing as pretty."

Estelle chuckled through her tears, glancing up at Sazh – who had moved only as far as allowing tears to run down his face – before training her gaze back on her son. "Baby, you don't even want to know how many times I had to use earplugs whenever your daddy would try to sing to me."

Dajh giggled at the image and took his mother's hand shyly. "Hey Mommy, do you get to stay with us now? Or will you have to leave again?"

Estelle looked him straight in the eye. "Would you like me to stay with you, Dajh?"

"Uh-huh." The boy nodded emphatically. "And maybe, when I get to be in Serah's class again, I can tell stories of my own instead of telling Dad's!"

"Then, my precious little man, I'm not going anywhere."

In a flash, the boy closed the remaining distance between himself and his mother and flung his arms around her as she crumpled completely to the ground, sobbing as her emotional burden fell away just as quickly and easily as the tears pouring down her cheeks.

"My baby," Estelle breathed as she wept in joy. "You been taking care of your old man for me while I was gone?"

"Yep," Dajh nodded. "I made a wish once on the magic fireworks that he would be happy, and he was! Except when I was asleep for a long time, he wasn't so happy again, but when I woke up, he was the same old dad!"

"A long time, huh?" Estelle chuckled. "Just how long were you slackin', little man? You know your old dad can't do a thing without you and me."

"Oh, he did real good, Mommy. He helped save the world, you know!"

"Oh, he did, did he?"

"Yep! And I helped, too. We even helped beat a god!" Dajh turned around in Estelle's embrace. "Come on and tell her, Dad! You're way better at telling stories than me."

But it was as if Sazh had turned to crystal. If not for the tracks carved by tears on his face, he may as well have been. Estelle stood with Dajh's hand in hers and the boy pulled her towards her husband. She came to a stop right in front of him before he said anything at all.

"Essie…" he choked. "You…"

"Serah found me in a library in Paris," she explained clumsily, though no question had been asked. "She's the one who told me you were here."

"You..."

"I just got into town," she continued hastily. "Serah arranged the whole thing." Estelle timidly reached up and cradled Sazh's cheek just as a tear escaped his eye and rolled over her hand. "I looked for you…" she whispered, not trusting the integrity of her voice with the way her heart was fluttering madly inside her chest. "Both of you, but I couldn't find any information. And then I got a job offer here at the university and I had asked them to wait until I could find yo-"

Estelle was cut off as Sazh crashed his mouth into hers. Her eyes widened, but closed just as quickly as she melted into her husband's embrace. Serah took Dajh's hand, picked up his toy for him, and guided him into the restaurant behind Snow and Bartholomew to give the reunited spouses some privacy. Dajh was all too happy to follow. He loved his parents, but he didn't so much like seeing them be all affectionate like that. It grossed him out.

"Hey Serah, do you and Snow do that, too?" he asked with an air of disgust.

"Sometimes," she giggled in reply. "It's how two people who really love each other a lot greet each other after they've been apart."

"I hope I never grow up, then," the boy announced.

Snow chuckled and ruffled the boy's hair again. "Aw, come on, Dajh! One day, you'll get older, and you'll meet a girl who makes you feel that way."

"Uh-uh," Dajh shook his head. "I'm gonna take care of animals when I grow up, not… do that."

"You want to be a veterinarian, Dajh?" Bartholomew asked.

"Yep! I thought Dad might want me to be a mechanic and fly planes like he does, but he said I can do whatever I want."

Bartholomew nodded approvingly at the boy. "That's an honorable profession. One I'm sure this world needs."

"So I'm gonna pay real close attention in Serah's classes when she talks about biogoly and stuff!"

"Biology," Serah corrected over Snow's roaring laughter and Bartholomew's chuckling. "I'll be sure to teach some extra lessons on mammal anatomy just for you, okay?"

"Cool!"

Once Snow had recovered enough, he walked up to the host's station. "We have a reservation for five adults and one kiddo," he told the Maitre'd' behind the podium.

"Would you like to be seated now, or would you prefer to wait for your entire party?" the man asked pleasantly.

Snow glanced out the front door to where Sazh and Estelle were still in the midst of their reunion. "Eh, probably best to just seat us now. They might be a while," he said, hitching his thumb in the Katzroys' direction. "Just tell them where we are whenever they decide to join us. They should finish up out there sooner or later."


Hope wiped the sweat off his brow after marking the last row of posts for the fence. It wasn't hard work, necessarily; in fact, he rather enjoyed the mathematical precision in drawing up the plans, scaling the measurements, and very, very carefully plotting each row of post holes in laser-straight lines. He found comfort in the meticulous number-crunching, checking and rechecking his measurements and then checking them again, and the satisfaction he felt when the plot's dimensions were right on point from every angle was not unlike he felt when the new Cocoon began its ascent into the Pulsian sky.

He had taken it upon himself to pick up where his father and Snow had left off before breakfast while they were off in Strasbourg and was rather proud of the headway he'd made, especially since he had done it mostly alone. Lightning had offered to help at first, but after she had grown so frustrated with his constant "hold it straight, Light" instructions, she had gone back inside with a huff and only assisted when he needed someone to stabilize a stake while he stretched twine towards the next one, storming right back inside once he had tied it off. He wasn't sure what she was up to in there since he'd been working outside for the last couple of hours, only fifteen minutes of which she'd been out with him.

Hope reached for his t-shirt, which he had removed around an hour prior, and hung it around the back of his neck before he stretched the protesting musculature along his spine and shoulders. It had been too long since he'd subjected himself to this extent of manual labor, and he appreciated the way it relaxed him even through the discomfort it yielded. He'd have to get back to working out on a regular basis now that he had the time. A small smile graced his features as he remembered the times he - or rather, his body – would run through circuits with Light in the Ark any time she was especially restless or frustrated. Lifetimes before that, Lightning used to train him whenever time allowed, which wasn't as often as either of them would have liked, back when they traveled together as l'Cie. He made a mental note to invite her to train with him again. He knew she had her own frustrations and worries to work out now.

Squinting up at the sky and seeing how the sun was no longer as high as it had been when he started, he figured it was getting close to dinner and decided it was time to call it a day. He wouldn't have minded downing an entire bucket of ice water just then. He considered wiping down with his shirt, but he knew he would cool faster if he just left it for the time being. So, that's what he did, leaving his shirt hanging across his shoulders and tugging on either end of the fabric as he rolled his head in circles to stretch the tense muscles along the sides of his neck as he walked inside the house by way of the sunroom.

"Hope? That you?" Nora's voice echoed through the house.

"Yeah, Mom," he called back. "Hit a good stopping point for the day, I think."

"Come on in the kitchen then," came her voice again. "Drink some water before you get cleaned up."

Hope reveled in the way the gentle breeze created by the large ceiling fan cooled his hot skin as he made his way through the living room. Leaving the thin sheen of sweat on his torso had definitely been the right choice. As he entered the kitchen, Nora already had a large glass of ice water set out for him on the island. He plopped down on one of the barstools and thanked her before taking a long, slow drink from the glass. Grabbing the hair hanging in front of his face and holding it up and back against his crown, Hope held the cool glass against his forehead and let the condensation on the glass intermix with the sweat that was quickly drying on his brow. I am going to take the longest shower ever later tonight...

"Hey Nora, I couldn't find the dessert book, but I did manage to find the recipe for it on... on the..."

Hope pulled the glass away from his face to smile nervously at Lightning, praying she wasn't still irritated with him, as she walked in with a piece of paper held rather limply in her hand. She had frozen to the spot in the entryway and was staring at him, her lips just barely parted and her eyes wide. So many moments passed without her so much as blinking that he became concerned and, setting his glass on the countertop, he stood from the barstool to be at the ready to come to her aid should she need it.

"Lightning?" Nora had turned around a few moments after Lightning had entered, and her voice was tinged with mischief as she said her name. When Lightning remained in a trance, Hope started forward in alarm.

"Light!"

As if his voice had flicked a switch in Lightning's mind, she jumped just slightly, dropping the piece of paper outright. "Oh! ...Oh gods." A conspicuously red-faced Lightning was making a show of picking up the paper and busying herself with something in the refrigerator, keeping her back turned towards him all the while even if it caused her to side-step across the floor. He walked up behind her, a bit perplexed at her behavior.

"Light? Are you okay?" he asked in concern as he placed his hand gently on her shoulder.

"Fine! Just… fine, I'm fine, everything's... fine." The words tumbled out of her mouth just as quickly as she had shied away from his hand and rushed towards the stovetop. She picked up the closest thing to her and used it to stir the contents of the pot that had been steaming away since Hope had walked in.

"Lightning, dear?" Nora said calmly.

"Huh?"

"You're stirring the chocolate with the empty paper towel roll."

Lightning blinked as she stared at hand she was stirring with and swore as she withdrew the cardboard tube, dripping dark chocolate goo everywhere. "Shit! Oh gods, I'm so sorry, Nora, I... I don't know what's gotten into me," she faltered as she grabbed the dish rag from the sink and went about cleaning up the mess she had made.

"I have a theory," Nora said to herself, so quietly that Hope had barely heard standing right next to her. He raised an eyebrow at his mother, who only shrugged. "Penny in the air..."

Hope watched in bemusement for a second before he knelt down to help her, but Lightning gasped audibly and jumped backward to put some distance between the two of them. "NO, Hope, please, you don't have to- just let me- it's my screw-up, just let me do it. I'm almost done anyway." And she was, so an increasingly bewildered Hope stood to the side until she had wiped up the last drop of chocolate and began to rinse the rag in the sink. He stared blankly as she scrubbed the fabric furiously against itself under the running water until a mark he knew hadn't been on her cheek before caught his eye.

"Here, hold still," he said as he took his thumb and wiped the intruding chocolate off of her face. She did indeed hold very, very still, staring intently into the stream of water pouring onto the cloth in her hands. She only dared a glance in her periphery when, instead of washing it in the already running water, Hope brought the digit to his lips and sucked the chocolate off of it. "Hm... you might want to turn down the heat on that burner, Light," he remarked after swirling the chocolate around on his tongue to gauge the flavor. "It's starting to get too bitter."

In a series of faster, clumsier movements than he had ever seen from anybody, let alone her, Lightning dropped the rag into the sink, shut off the water, muttered something about excusing herself, and dashed out of the kitchen and up the stairs in a pink and red blur, leaving Hope gaping after her. Nora crossed smoothly to the stovetop to do as Hope had suggested, wearing the smuggest grin on her face as she stirred the dark chocolate fondue with the rubber spatula propped on a spoon rest on the counter.

"What... the hell… was that," he managed in his astonishment.

"Oh, like you don't know." If Hope didn't know better, he'd have thought that was pride dripping from his mother's voice.

"Mom, if I knew, would I have asked?"

Nora turned her head so he could see the smirk on her face more clearly. "Hope Nolan Estheim, please tell me you are not that clueless." When he continued staring at her in confusion, she turned back to the pot and shook her head in amusement. "Damn good genes, kiddo. That's all I'm saying."

It was pride, Hope realized, and he looked down to inspect his appearance. He furrowed his brow, observing the way his chest and abdominal muscles rippled beneath the skin as he arched his back just enough to aid his view. Letting his arms fall limply to his sides, he lifted his gaze and stared absently into the direction in which Light had disappeared while he absorbed the truth of the matter.

He was the reason she had so completely lost her shit. Him. Sweaty, lanky, smelly, dirty Hope Estheim had turned the indomitable, unyielding, self-assured Claire 'Lightning' Farron into what amounted to an adorably awkward bull in a chocolate-covered china shop.

"Shut... up," he breathed as Nora laughed at the goofy grin on his face. With renewed vigor, Hope rushed out of the kitchen and up the stairs after her.

"And the penny…" Nora sang to herself, holding the spatula at eye level and watching the chocolate run off of it in perfect consistency before letting it fall back into the pot, "drops."


"I still can't believe you're even sitting here, Essie," Sazh said for probably the fifth time in an hour.

"Well get used to it, because I'll be damned if you can get rid of me now," she sassed.

Having long since paid their bill, the group had been sitting together for the past hour lazily finishing their meals and reminiscing about the days before Estelle's untimely passing in an attempt to help Dajh feel more comfortable with his mother. The more Snow watched Sazh and Estelle together, the fonder he became of the quick-witted woman, and the faster he wanted to marry Serah so he could enjoy his similarly compatible relationship with her day in and day out. The Katzroys complemented each other so well – the easy-going father with a strong sense of responsibility and the no-nonsense mother who couldn't help but crack a joke. And then there was little Dajh, who sat between them happily finishing off his meal, a portrait of innocence. Even though he was eight years old now, the kid hadn't changed at all since the day Snow had first met him under the shadow of a newly crystallized Cocoon. It astounded him how a child Dajh's age could go through so much hardship and come out on the other end completely unfazed.

"So what will you three do now, old man?" he asked in his typical boisterous way. "Can't live in the shop anymore now that you've got your lady back!"

"You're letting my baby live above a garage, Sazh?" Estelle exclaimed with mock offense. "Have things gone downhill that much without me around?"

"For a long time, they had," Sazh replied solemnly. Estelle softened and took the hand he had reached around their son.

"Well, we'll get that fixed right up. Won't we, Dajh?" The boy nodded enthusiastically with a mouth full of biscuit.

"'Eah, 'ah-ee!"

"Don't talk with your mouth full, baby, it's rude."

"Have you spoken with the faculty at the university yet, Estelle?" Bartholomew asked. "I have to head over there for a bit to pick up some documents for work if you'd like to come along and talk to HR about your job offer."

"That's a great idea, Bartholomew, thank you," Estelle replied.

"I just realized," Serah interjected, "that I never asked you what you do here, Bartholomew. You work at the university?"

"I'm a researcher," the eldest Estheim said with a nod. "Tenured and everything."

"What is it you study?" Sazh asked as he cut the last bit of Dajh's chicken into more manageable pieces.

"Bioengineering, in a broad sense. More specifically, my team and I are investigating realism in prosthetics." Serah grinned as she watched Bartholomew speak; it was clear now where Hope got his habit for gesticulating. "Our main goals are to so closely recreated fluidity of movement in artificial components that the wearer can't tell a difference between the natural and the manmade, and to invent a material that so universally and accurately mimics human bone and tissue that component rejection becomes a thing of the past."

"Wow," Sazh whistled. "That is one ambitious project."

"Ambitious in scale, yes, but simple in scope," Bartholomew told them after he had finished off his tea. "We've kept our overall goals fairly simple because we know how complex the problems are. But we are making headway, particularly on the former objective."

"Is Hope going to help with your project at all?" Snow asked as he leaned back in chair. "I mean, if anybody has a knack for solving impossible problems, it's that kid."

Bartholomew laughed, beaming with pride. "I actually haven't even asked."

"Do you plan to?" Sazh chimed in.

"I don't think so, no. At least, not for a while. He deserves the opportunity to choose his own path for once. If he offers, I would happily accept… but I want him to explore his options."

"Makes sense," Snow said, his respect for the man growing. He knew Hope and his dad once had a strained relationship, but no one could deny how much the man loved and respected his son. Serah interrupted the moment by exhaling loudly in exasperation as she reached for her purse hanging off of her knee. "What is it, babe?" Snow asked her, watching while she rummaged through the bag.

"My phone keeps buzzing nonstop," she explained, retrieving the offending item and holding it up as she squinted at the screen, exploding into raucous laughter after a moment. "Oh, gods," she sighed.

"What is it?" Estelle asked curiously.

"My sister's in the middle of some personal crisis … hold on, she wants me to call her." Serah stood once she had eyed the best place to take a call without disturbing anybody. "Would you excuse me for just a sec?"

"Wonder what's got Sis all worked up," Snow mused after Serah had walked away.

"Not sure, but Estelle, we should get going here if you want to catch HR," Bartholomew told her after clearing the last of the food off of his plate. "They tend to duck out early on Fridays."

"We can do that," Estelle said with a nod and turned to Sazh. "Do you want to come along?"

"I would," Sazh answered, "but I need to get Dajh and me back to the shop and get everything ready for you. Bartholomew, would you mind dropping her off when you're done at the university?"

"Not at all," he answered kindly, looking up as Serah returned to her seat with an oddly twisted smirk on her face. "Well? What's the matter with Lightning?"

"Would you believe it if I told you that the one way I have ever heard of to turn my sister into a bumbling mess is to have your son walk around without his shirt on?"

"Oh my god," Snow breathed just before he exploded into roaring laughter.

"And now she's managed to barricade herself in his room when she had intended to go to the guest room and she's demanding my help," Serah finished mischievously.

"You know, I always thought those two had something special between them," Sazh laughed, shaking his head in his amusement. "Didn't know ol' Soldier Girl could lose her cool like that."

"Maybe her time as Savior changed her more than we thought." Serah grinned.

"The timing is perfect anyway," Bartholomew interjected, badly suppressing a grin. "I need to get Estelle to the university first and then drop her back at Sazh's, but then we can all go back home."

"I suppose she'll survive without my help for a little while," Serah giggled as she tidied up the table space in front of her. She liked making the wait staff's job easier.

"Why don't you and Snow just go on home now?" Sazh asked.

Serah looked confused. "We don't have any way of getting there, remember?" she pointed out. "We brought your car back here so we could return-"

"Keep it," Sazh interrupted, shocking everyone at the table – especially Serah.

"What?"

"You heard me, little lady," he said firmly, and then continued after gazing affectionately towards his wife. "You brought back the better part of me. Giving you a means of transport is the least I can do."

"Besides," Dajh piped up, "me and Dad are almost done fixing up another car!"

Serah blinked as she stared at Sazh. "But-"

"No buts, Serah. Now you take good care of that vehicle. Treat her good and she'll be with you for a long, long time."

"Sazh, please let me pay you."

The jovial man shook his head to deny her, but paused. "Actually, I do have one request. In exchange for the car, any time she needs fixing or tuning or any servicing whatsoever, you bring her to me and me only, and you don't argue with me when I give you a 50% discount."

Snow answered for his shell-shocked fiancée. "Thanks, old man! You're the best!"

"What're you thanking me for? You're dreaming if you think Serah will let you drive her car for a while."

Snow laughed again and glanced over at his girlfriend. "Yeah, right, Sa-" But Serah's arms were crossed and her back was unnaturally straight. "…Seriously, babe?"

"Yup." She drew out the word for emphasis, but couldn't contain her smirk. "Last time you drove me anywhere, I ended up swallowed by a fal'Cie."

"But-"

"Look at it this way – you'll have a chance to practice with directions so you can redeem yourself to Hope," Serah suggested as she stood from the table to collect her things. Snow scoffed and tried to hide his disappointment.

"Keh! Our phones tell us where to go, I can handle that! Just don't hand me a map upside-down and we're good."

"Snow, did Hope actually hand you an upside-down map?" she asked with her hands on her hips and an expression on her face that clearly said don't you dare lie, either.

"Well… no, but he didn't point it out when I turned it that way, either."

"Then don't complain." Serah and Snow said their goodbyes to the Katzroys, who promised to see them the following Saturday for dinner at the Estheims', and took their leave. "Now come on. We need to get back before Sis does anything stupid."

"Or Hope does." Snow smirked as he offered his arm to Serah once they had exited the restaurant. "He's got it bad for Lightning."

"Oh, they've both got it bad, I think…" she admitted, happily taking the arm that was offered her. Her mood soured just slightly when she recognized the look that had appeared on her fiancé's face. "But, Snow Villiers, we will not push the issue, we will not find a billion convenient excuses to put the two of them alone together in potentially compromising situations, and we will not interfere otherwise."

"So… then what is it exactly you'll be doing once we get back to the house?" he teased. "Because it sounds exactly like interfering."

"I'll be coming to my sister's aid, obviously," Serah rationalized. When Snow raised his eyebrow at her, she huffed in offense. "What? She asked me! I'm not going to give her any suggestions – just… make her not feel like such an idiot."

"Ch'yeah. Right, babe," Snow grinned. She could lie to herself all she wanted, but he knew better. After reaching the car, he unlocked and opened the driver's side door for her and closed it behind her before taking his own place in the passenger's seat.

"…Okay, fine, I might make one teeny mention of how compatible they are, but that's it, I swear."

"Mmhm."

"Snow, I'm serious!" Serah was almost outright pouting now, and Snow had to concentrate very hard to rid himself of the idea of pulling her into the backseat with him. Her lips were… distracting.

"If you say so," he gave in playfully, pulling up the route to the Estheim residence on his phone's navigation program.

Serah smiled in delight as the car – her car – roared to life. She still didn't think Sazh had been appropriately compensated to that end, but she vowed to think of something.


I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot. I. Am. An. Idiot.

This was the mantra playing in Lightning's head as she paced back and forth in Hope's room. Hope's room – not the guest room like she had intended. When she wasn't pacing, she was splayed on her stomach across the bed trying to keep the image of his bare, muscular, sweaty torso out of her head, but the bed smelled too much like him and she'd end up right back on her feet pacing back and forth, taking the occasional break to either bang her forehead against the wall or splash her face with cold water. Several minutes passed like this until, finally, she gave up trying to snap herself out of… whatever she was feeling, slumping down onto the desk chair and holding her face in her hands.

"What is wrong with me…" she muttered quietly, dropping her hands and staring at them. "It's Hope."

It was Hope. The boy she had tried to shrug off in her panic in the Vile Peaks. The kid she inspired to dig deep and become better, and who in turn inspired her to do the same. The man who had accomplished so much for her sake and in her honor. The soul she had saved that had saved her in return. Wasn't she just this morning considering the idea of spending her days with him? Yes, but you weren't falling all over yourself at the sight of him then, she admonished herself as she stood, finally ready to leave the safety of the room. She thought she should probably talk to him about her behavior… maybe excuse it as a passing illness or momentary dizziness or some other lie to mask that which she was in no way prepared to acknowledge. Lightning's hand was frozen to the handle of the door as she tried to come up with a believable excuse, but she could think of nothing except what would happen to their friendship now. If he had figured out why she had reacted the way she did downstairs…

Letting her hand drop from the handle, Lightning turned and leaned her back against the still locked door, sliding down its façade until she was seated on the floor and pulling her knees to her chest. "Oh, Hope…" she sighed. "What am I going to do with you?"

"That's your call, I think."

Lightning jumped at the sound of Hope's voice on the other side of the door. "Geez, Hope," she hissed, her hand pressing above her pounding heart. "A little warning that you were there would have been nice."

"I knocked a little while ago," he replied quietly. "I thought you heard me and were just refusing to let me in." Lightning's face fell at the twinge of hurt in his voice… but she still didn't open the door.

"No, I didn't hear," she said after a few silent moments. And, after a few more, "I probably wouldn't have let you in if I had, though. I just… needed to collect myself. Nothing personal."

Hope hummed in acknowledgment, but said nothing further. Lightning leaned her head back against the door, torturing herself with ways to break the uncomfortable silence. "Hey, Hope?"

"Hm?"

"Um…" Should have thought this out better, Farron. "How long have you been out there?"

"I came up right after you left. Been sitting against the door out here ever since." Guilt tugged at her heart as she knew she had been in his room for at least twenty minutes, if not more. As if to reinforce her estimate, he added, "I think my butt went numb about ten minutes ago."

She snorted at that, especially since her own was starting to feel the effects of sitting on the carpet already and poor Hope was stuck with the hardwood lining the hallway. "Sorry."

"It's okay. It's my fault anyway."

"Don't be ridiculous, Hope," she scoffed. "I'm the one who lost her mind and barricaded herself in someone else's room." More uncomfortable silence, which was thankfully shorter than that which had fallen before. Or maybe not, considering Hope's choice reply.

"That's… my fault too, though," he ventured hesitantly, sounding more like a nervous kid with a fresh l'Cie brand than the accomplished scientist and proven world leader he had become. "Isn't it?" Lightning felt her heart start pounding all over again and swallowed hard. "I-it's okay if it is," Hope added hastily in a strangely apologetic tone. "I mean, it's okay if it's not, too, but I'm totally okay if it is-"

"Hope," Lightning interrupted, after which Hope fell so silent she was sure he had stopped breathing. She took a deep breath of her own in an effort to calm her wildly beating heart before she spoke. "How do you feel?"

"…Huh?" It sounded like that wasn't what he had been expecting. To be honest, it wasn't what she had expected to ask until the words were already out.

"About… about me," she clarified, feeling oddly cold all of a sudden. She felt silly for being so anxious about asking, especially since she thought she might already know the answer.

"Um…" Hope trailed off and Lightning felt even colder while she waited for him to continue. "Light?" She said nothing, hoping her silence would urge him along. "I…" His voice was louder and muffled, as if he were speaking into the doorframe. A loud sigh that came directly from that space confirmed it. "…Look, Light, I'd really rather not say any of this to a door," he said, sounding perturbed. "Can I please come in? I promise I'll stay across the room."

Lightning didn't know why, but the stab in her heart when he said that was so strong, it actually made her wince. "You don't have to do that," she muttered sheepishly, standing slowly so as not to make herself dizzy and opening the door. She couldn't help but grin when she saw Hope kneeling with his face against the doorframe right next to where the door had just been, especially given his surprise as he looked up to meet her gaze. "Come on in," she invited before reclaiming his desk chair, sitting with her arms and legs tightly crossed. Hope smiled in a way she knew was a mask for his disquietude as he closed the door behind him and sat on the edge of his bed.

"Thanks for the invite to my own room," he joked nervously. "I'd almost forgotten what it looked like."

Lightning was too anxious to laugh and instead fixed him with a pointed look to indicate she was still waiting for the answer to the question he had refused to answer from the hallway. "So?"

She watched with a mixture of unease and aggravation, more at the situation than specifically Hope, as he fiddled with the hem of his shirt, which, thankfully, he had put back on. He stared at his hands for what felt like ages and Lightning wanted to either jump out of her skin or shake it out of him or both any second just so she could stop feeling like an icicle. When the pressure was almost too much, Hope finally looked her straight in the eye with fierce determination not unlike she had seen so many times as she watched over him from Valhalla.

"Light," he began, looking down again and visibly swallowing before he went on. She thought for sure she wouldn't be able to hear a word he said with how loudly her heart was pounding in her ears. "You remember in the Whitewood, when I asked to take point in your stead?" She nodded curtly, wondering where the hell he was going with this. "Do you remember how happy I was when you trusted me with that?" She nodded again, raising an eyebrow curiously this time. "Do you know why I was so happy?"

"God, Hope, this isn't supposed to be twenty questions," she snapped, but softened immediately in regret. "Sorry," she muttered, looking away from his bemused expression. "I'm just a little on edge."

"So am I," he admitted, but stayed the course. "Light, I was happy because you trusted me. Even though you had already taken it back and apologized, being told I was a burden still stung, even then."

"Hope, I never should have-"

He smiled and held up a hand to silence her. "I was a burden to you. I had been way too wrapped up in my own problems to see how afraid you were, and how much you were suffering because of Serah. When you let me take point, I could finally contribute to your cause as well as my own. When you told me to keep looking forward, and that you had my back… for the first time since my mother died, I felt like I mattered to someone."

"What about Vanille?" Lightning interjected. "She was mothering you from the start."

"Yeah, but that was mostly irritating at the time," he explained. "And mostly because, again, I was so self-absorbed at the time. I didn't want another mom. I wanted my mom back, and I knew that wasn't possible. I just wanted Vanille to leave me alone for a long time… which is one of three reasons why I chose to follow you."

"Three reasons?" Lightning echoed curiously.

"The second was that you seemed to hate Snow as much as I did, and I needed someone to validate my desire to see him burn for what he did." Lightning felt a measure of pride in the fact that Hope's voice carried no bitterness in it at the mention of his foiled plot for revenge. "The third was that I simply admired you. The way you carried yourself so confidently, the grace with which you moved in battle, your resourcefulness, quick thinking, and resolve…" She wondered if he was aware of the tender smile on his face as he recounted his memories of their travels as l'Cie. It both warmed her heart and scared her to death. "The way you set out to do something and just did it. Didn't hedge, argue, wait for backup… you just took action. I wanted to be you, and to do that, I needed to stay with you. It turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made."

"Should I be worried that following a screw-up was one of your best decisions, or that that's your opinion?" Lightning snorted, more at her own expense than anything.

"Following the most self-assured woman on the planet, yes, was one of my best. Easily ranks up there with not putting my shirt back on before I came back in the house today," he grinned. Lightning scowled and looked away until her face cooled off. "Seriously, Light. I wouldn't have survived without you. You've saved me more times than I can count."

"Are you kidding me?" she exclaimed, facing him again and frowning outright. "All I've done is get you hurt." Eyes wide, she shrank back in the chair just slightly when Hope stood and moved towards her, each step acting as a bullet point for the times he attributed his survival to her.

"Vile Peaks. Gapra Whitewood. Palumpolum, more than once. By that creek outside the steppe. When Alexander first appeared." He had spanned half the distance between them and Lightning realized he was listing faster than he was moving. "Eden. Battle against Orphan. Every time I saw you fighting in Valhalla in the Oracle Drive. When you spoke to me in the time capsule to tell me I was on the right path." Lightning had to look up to see his face now that he had all but closed the distance between them, and he knelt in front of her, sitting back on his heels, so she wouldn't have to crane her neck to make eye contact. "Every time I saw you out of the corner of my eye or heard the faintest whisper of my name in your voice as we struggled against the Chaos, even though that wasn't really you. When you reached for my hand when I came to say goodbye after being cast aside by Bhunivelze. When you used your knife to free me." Lightning had long since uncrossed her arms and legs, and Hope took advantage of this by taking one of her hands to hold in both of his own. If she hadn't known of the physical impossibility, she would have sworn her heart would beat its way out of her chest. "You saved me when you let me come back for you and fight by your side, and when your light guided me to this world. You saved me at the bank, at the restaurant, when I was burning up in chronostasis…" She could hear the faintest bitterness creep into his voice at the last mention, but when he spoke again, it was replaced by a warmth she had never heard from him before. "Every moment we've been here together, Light. How could you have done me any harm when you were too busy making my life worthwhile?"

She felt him squeeze her hand gently and vaguely realized she was trembling and shut her eyes firmly when they started to sting. "Hope…"

"You ask how I feel about you?" he continued, waiting for her to look at him through the blur of tears before he went on. "I feel more gratitude than I know how to express. I feel like the luckiest man alive to have been your partner all this time. I feel joy when I think about all the time we've spent together, and pain when I remember all the time we spent apart. I feel unworthy to be in your company, undeserving of your affection. I feel a heat I've never known whenever you're near…" He reached up to brush her cheek and the skin felt immediately cooler – which she quickly realized was due to the residual moisture of a tear she hadn't noticed he'd wiped away. "I feel empty any time you aren't with me, and whenever I imagine you living somewhere without me, I feel fear."

"Fear?" she echoed in a near whisper. "Why?"

Hope's face fell slightly. "You've disappeared on me before," he said quietly, his grip on her hand tightening as if he thought she would do so right then and there. "If that were to happen when we weren't together, I couldn't save you."

Something inside Lightning snapped as she leaped out of her chair and threw her arms around Hope's neck, joining him on the floor and smiling at the grunt of surprise that escaped him, not unlike the one he'd uttered the first time she hugged him in Palumpolum. The déjà vu was overwhelming, and not in a bad way. "Hope, you don't have to save me," she murmured against his shoulder. "You already have."

"Huh?" She felt more than heard his confusion in the way his body stiffened.

"Almost as many times as you say I've helped you." Lightning smiled as she felt Hope's hands trail around her waist and back until he fully returned her embrace. They stayed that way for quite some time, but something else was nagging at her and she pulled back.

"…So what happens now?" he asked, effectively handing the decision to her, even though she knew what his answer to that question would be. Her face fell as she already felt guilty about her own.

"I… I don't know that I'm ready to discuss it," she faltered, refusing to meet his gaze lest it betray the hurt and confusion she knew she must have caused as soon as she opened her stupid mouth. Already feeling the need to apologize, words started tumbling clumsily from her lips. "I do care about you, a lot – probably more than I'm to even think about, but I just… with everything that's going on right now and how little sleep we've both gotten lately, and, honestly, how not used to you being older and taller than me I-"

She was interrupted by his rich laughter and blinked as she looked into his eyes, which harbored not even a veiled pain. "Light, it's okay," he smiled as he took hold of both of her hands this time. "I understand completely, and I don't want you to feel pressured." The warmth of his smile gave her butterflies and she could feel her face slowly heating up. "I don't expect anything from you," he continued. "And just because you know how I feel doesn't mean we have to act on it."

"But I want to act on it," she blurted before she could stop herself, and knew by how her face was positively radiating heat that it had to be as red as her old GC uniform cape.

"Good," Hope sighed in relief.

"Just… not yet." Lightning puffed out her cheeks as she blew the hair out of her eyes in exasperation. "Can we just, I don't know… stay the way we are for now? I promise I'll let you know the moment I'm ready."

"Of course we can, Light."

"Because I will be ready, sooner or later," she vowed, then adding so quietly he barely heard, "since I can't imagine being without you either."

"I've waited this long. I'd wait forever for you." A funny little grin appeared on his face. "If you think about it, I already have waited forever for you, so there's no way I'm throwing in the towel now."

"Good," Lightning smiled, taking the hand he offered to help her to her feet after he stood.

"Now, will you come down and help with dinner?" he asked. "It's been nearly ready for a while now, and Mom is probably wondering what it is we're up to, what with all the banging around you were doing earlier."

Lightning scowled as she shoved him halfheartedly through the door in front of her. "Shut up." He laughed and did not resist as she pushed him along ahead of her, which was mostly to keep him from seeing how flustered she was again. She made a mental note to spend some time later doing whatever she could to avoid losing her cool whenever more… delicate subjects came up between them, because there was no way Snow would let her live it down if she did so when he was around. Lightning was already fairly sure she would get an earful when he and Serah came back and her fist was at the ready should he not let up.

When she and Hope had reached the kitchen, they found Nora had already cleaned up from their first cooking lesson – which is what she had been doing while Hope was working in the yard – and had already finished the rest of the prep. She was sitting on one of the barstools at the island sipping some tea and reading some old book, which she promptly closed as they walked in.

"Oh good, you're out," she said, her mischievous tone from earlier completely gone. "Ready to eat? Serah just called and said she and Snow were about to pass through Alsace, so they'll be here in about ten minutes."

Lightning groaned as quietly as she could from behind Hope and he answered for her. "We're starved," he said. "What can we help with, Mom?"

"Oh thanks, honey. Why don't you and Lightning get all the plates and things and set the table?"

"Sure," he replied, already reaching towards the cabinets. He counted out six plates and handed them back to Lightning.

"Wait, sorry," Nora said quickly from where she was busying herself with the chicken they had set to roast earlier. "Don't worry about getting your father a plate. He had to stop at the university and won't be home until after dinner."

"Then… how are they getting back, if Bartholomew isn't driving them?" Lightning asked.

"Or is Dad hitching a ride home?" Hope added.

"Apparently Sazh gave your sister that car he let you borrow," Nora explained, reaching into the oven for the gratin dauphinois after placing the chicken on the stovetop. The smell was so overwhelmingly pleasant that Lightning felt an uncomfortable twinge under the base of her tongue as she salivated, which only momentarily distracted her from the fact that her sister had gotten a vehicle for free.

"What? What for?"

"She didn't say." Nora smiled as she carried the chicken and potatoes into the dining room on a single oversized serving platter. "But I would guess it had something to do with Estelle." Lightning glanced up at Hope before the two of them followed her with the place settings.

"I want a car," Hope muttered, and Nora couldn't help but laugh at his childlike disappointment.

"I'm sure your father wouldn't mind taking you into town so you can buy one," his mother told him as he set plates and salad bowls at five of the chairs around the table. Lightning followed behind him with glasses and utensils.

"I think I want a bike," Lightning said out of the blue, and Hope and Nora glanced curiously at her, the latter before disappearing back into the kitchen.

"It would take you a while to get into town on a bicycle, Light," Hope teased, "though if both Serah and I have a car, I suppose you wouldn't really need-"

"No," Lightning interrupted, shaking her head. "I mean a sportbike."

Hope's eyes widened, then narrowed as his brow furrowed. "Those things are incredibly dangerous."

"Only if you ride them like an idiot," she countered, "and maybe don't crash them into Vestiges like somebody I know. Besides, out here, I wouldn't have to worry as much about the stupidity of other people while riding." He remained conflicted despite her sound reasoning, and she felt a combination of affection and exasperation in regard to his concern, but she couldn't blame him for it. She would have reacted the same way were the tables turned. "I'm not asking permission," she added in as non-confrontational a tone as she could manage. She had made up her mind, but didn't want him to think she was completely disregarding his feelings about it. His worry had abated some, but it was still there.

"Will you at least see if Serah or I will drive you wherever before you run out on that thing?" he pleaded with her. Even though it wasn't the most appropriate response, she couldn't help but laugh.

"Hope, I haven't even gotten it yet," she grinned. "But it's just for whenever I want to get some air or something. I promise you'll get to chauffeur me around more than you'll probably want to."

"Oh, I doubt I'll ever not jump at any excuse to spend time with you," he said warmly, and she looked away as her cheeks warmed again, focusing instead on needlessly straightening the utensils on the table. Nora had returned with a pitcher of tea and a large bowl filled with salad greens, placing both in the center of the table on either side of the main dish.

"Things went well upstairs, then?" Nora asked innocently. Lightning could have dropped dead from embarrassment since it was clear from the undertones of Nora's question that her suspicions were anything but.

"Not as well as you're thinking," Hope replied slyly, "but I think we came to an understanding." He gazed affectionately at Lightning as he said the last bit, and she smiled as she looked down at her hands again. "Just don't start planning any weddings or anything, Mom. I know how you are."

Nora laughed and held her hands up in surrender. "I wasn't going to," she grinned. "There's another wedding to plan first."


Serah sat in the driver's seat scrolling through information about the University of Strasbourg on her phone as Snow topped off the gas tank. They had stopped just inside Alsace proper to fill up (and also because Snow needed something to tide him over until they got back for dinner) and she seized the opportunity to do some more research on the education degree program there now that she knew both Estelle and Bartholomew were working there.

"Whatcha lookin' at, babe?" Snow asked as he slid back into his seat with a bag of chips and a soda, handing her a bottle of peach green tea before pulling his door shut.

"Thank you," she said, bringing the glass to her mouth and letting the smooth, lightly sweetened tea soothe her throat. "I'm looking at the teaching program at the university Bartholomew works at."

"What for?"

"Because I have to have a degree if I want to teach in this world," she explained simply.

Snow's brow furrowed suddenly. "So… you're going to go to school?" he asked hesitantly.

"Well, yeah," Serah giggled. "I was going to go to university in Eden before… everything happened. You knew that back then."

"When do you start?"

"I don't even know if I've been accepted yet," she smiled. He was strangely concerned and she thought it silly.

"How long is the program?"

"…Snow, would you like to read the pamphlet?" she teased as she turned the key in the ignition, smiling as the car roared to life. It still hadn't quite sunk in that the car was hers now.

"No, it's just…" He stopped short and she glanced curiously at him in her periphery before checking to see if traffic was clear enough for her to pull out.

"Just… what?" she pressed.

"Do you want to get married before you start, or do you want to wait until after you're done with school?" The words tumbled out of his mouth with such speed that she had almost misunderstood them entirely. Snow's expression reminded her of a lost puppy when he did that, and she softened immediately.

"Oh, Snow… people get married while they're in school all the time," she assured him gently, still waiting for an opening in traffic. "Don't worry. We've been together this long, through life and death. I don't think a few years of university will be too much of an obstacle."

Snow sighed long and low. "Yeah," he said finally, "you're right. As usual. I don't know why I freaked out, but I'm sorry."

"I wouldn't call that a freak-out," she giggled just as she saw a break in the line of cars and prepared to accelerate. "Hold onto your drink," she told him. "Here we-"

Something flashed out of the corner of her eye and she slammed on the brakes before turning to look in the direction she was driving. There, right in front of the car, was a Moogle. "Mog?!" she exclaimed, narrowing her eyes as she inspected the tiny creature with no wand. No wand... "Wait, you're not… but how can you-"

"Serah, look at it," Snow cautioned. She did so, surprised by his defensive tone, and after a few moments, she could have sworn it flickered.

"But… I don't understand," she faltered.

"It's a decoy, Serah," he explained. "Lightning could do that. Which means one of our friends is nearby with power they shouldn't have."

Serah looked around in her rear and side-view mirrors, as well as anywhere else she could manage. Snow got back out of the car for an unobstructed view of their surroundings. She was at a loss as to who could be calling the decoy, but reached for her phone to tell her sister and Hope – and promptly dropped it on the floor with a start when a dark figure slammed against her window. "Snow!" she cried as she whipped around to face whom-or what-ever had face-planted into her door, eyes widening when she came face to familiar face with the would-be ram. "Wait… Noel?"

Sure enough, her time-hopping partner, looking rather winded doubled over with his hands on his knees, rising only enough to smile and wave while he caught his breath, was standing next to her car door, and the Moogle was gone. Serah got out of the car in a hurry, and Snow was at her side in an instant.

"Hiya," Noel said once he had the breath to do so. "Miss me?"

Snow hooked his arm around the side of Noel's neck in greeting before Serah even had a chance to blink. "Well, well! If it isn't the love-sick Shadow Hunter himself!"

Noel shrugged him off and punched his arm good-naturedly. "Oh, I'm sorry, who was it that locked himself in his room because he missed his fiancée too much?" Snow grinned and shrugged as Noel nearly fell back from the force behind Serah's embrace.

"What in the world are you doing here?" she asked incredulously, holding him at arm's length to look him over. "Are you okay? Where's Yeul? Was that your Moogle?"

"A million questions, as always," Noel chuckled. "You haven't changed a bit." He pulled back completely and straightened the neckline of his old silk shirt after both of them had completely displaced it. "One by one, then. I'm here because I'm looking for Lightning. Yes, I'm fine. Yeul is back at our flat in Paris, and… sort of."

"Sort of?" Snow echoed.

"It was just an illusion," Noel explained, then turned his attention to Snow. "I could see you from a few blocks back and was hauling ass to try and catch up to you, but then you got back in the car and I thought for sure I wasn't going to make it. Then suddenly, that little guy showed up."

"Did you feel strange when it appeared?" Snow asked urgently.

Noel's mouth narrowed and he nodded. "Yeah, it did, and I know why. I didn't know I even had any power, but the powers themselves are why I'm trying to find Lightning."

"She's back at the Estheims'," Serah told him.

"Hope's place?"

"His parents, actually, but we've all been staying there until we can find our own places to live."

Noel crossed his arms over his chest. "Does he have any powers?"

"He did," Snow said, "but they somehow transferred into Sis when she touched him in mid-spell."

"It was chronostasis, and we were affected, so we didn't see anything," Serah said, clearly troubled. "Lightning said Hope was burning up when she made contact with his arm."

"Yeah, I can imagine," Noel said darkly. "It's good he's free of it, but it could mean trouble for your sister, Serah."

"What do you mean?"

Noel glanced around them, looking uneasy. "Look, can we go see her? I can explain what little Yeul told me when we're all together."

"We're heading back there now," she said. "You're more than welcome to come along."

"Good. It's gonna take a while to explain all this and I'm fairly sure she's not gonna like it." Noel sank into the backseat of the car as Serah and Snow reclaimed their respective places. As she pulled out into the momentarily empty street, Serah silently thanked whatever was responsible for the convenience as she was sure she would have either dangerously cut off any oncoming vehicles, or collided with one. If there was something wrong with Lighting, or with any of the rest of them, a brick wall in the middle of the road wouldn't have stopped her.

[end ch. 11]


A quick note:

- Estelle's lullabye is an actual (though old and relatively obscure) lullabye called "Moon of Mamaku." I obviously made some changes to the lyrics, but if you want to know how it goes, feel free to Google it! One of the sites I could find (that I can't link to because of FFnet's formatting) has not only the lyrics, but an audio sample of the song sang by, if I'm not mistaken, Zooey Deschanel.

See you next week with my other favorite chapter so far! Leave a girl some feedback if you feel so inclined. :D