Isabella Swan
"Hello." I said into the phone, tentatively. "Is, er, Jacob there?"
"He's out with the pack." Billy answered simply.
"Can you tell him to call me when he gets back?" I said in a small voice. "As soon as he gets back."
"Sure." he said. "Why so worried though? He's fine."
"I know." I sighed. "It's just…I don't want him to get hurt."
And the fact that, apparently, the pack disagreed with us as a couple. I didn't voice the last thought.
"He's okay."
"I know." I curled the phone cord around my finger. "Well…bye."
"Yeah." Billy grunted. "Take care."
I sighed again. Charlie had gone out fishing with friends from his work. Jacob was still with his pack---I hadn't known whether he had told Emily or Leah yet.
Then, a muffled voice sounded from the phone, interrupting the awkward silence.
"Hey, is that Bella?" I heard a stressed voice say.
"Jake!" I breathed into the phone. "Is he home?"
"Here he is." Billy said in a resented tone.
My heart sputtered, awaiting for Jacob's heartfelt voice to fill the phone. The relief that surged through me was surprising---I hadn't realized I was holding my breath.
"Bells?"
"Jacob." I closed my eyes, clenching my hands tighter around the phone. "How did it go?"
"Not too well." he admitted. "Emily is at the reservation's clinic, unconscious."
"Oh. Poor her. She must be…in pieces." I shuddered, remembering how pathetic I had felt when Edward had left me. She would be beyond repair. Emily didn't have a Jacob to go save her, to show her that she had fallen for the wrong guy. She had to survive alone because Sam was her one soul mate in the entire world.
"I know. Everything's so messed up here." His tone was stressed and thick. "Leah didn't take it too well either."
I sensed a story behind his heavy words. "What happened?"
He hesitated. "She got…upset. You see…she blames me for his death."
"Jake, don't listen to her. You were---"
"I'm sick of hearing a million people telling me that I'm doing fine. Billy always tries to make me feel better about being Alpha, as if I really deserve it. Then there's Seth. He's trying to cheer me up, trying to forget the fact that I made his sister run away. And then I have to organize a bunch of stuff with the Elders, about what we're arranging. I don't need you trying to make me feel better too."
His words hit hard against me---as if the wind had been knocked out of me.
"I'm sorry!" he sounded hurt as he said the words. "I'm sorry, Bella. I keep saying things that I don't mean to."
"It's okay. Don't worry about me." My voice was a whisper.
"It's not you---it's me. I'm just…overwhelmed with my werewolf crap." he managed to chuckle. "You know how they say men aren't in touch with their emotions? I don't think it's like that for me."
"You are very in touch with your emotions." I managed to crack a smile.
"I can probably make up for the eons of apathetic men." he sighed. "It's just that I pour out my feelings to the one person who will listen. Sorry if I seem like a complainer."
"Please, Jacob." I shook my head at the phone. "I'm the one who has issues---I'm heavily impaired when it comes to my sense of anxiousness."
"Sure, sure."
He sounded like my Jacob again---in the days when we were just best friends in his garage, with sodas and candy hearts. It reminded of his wide, sincere grin whenever he saw me. It was my Jacob. "So, when can we meet up again?"
"We can take our motorcycles out this weekend sometime. I'll be pretty busy tomorrow."
"Really?" I tried to hide my disappointment. It didn't work.
"Bella…look, I can come over there at night. Would you mind?"
"Of course not!" I blurted. He laughed at my enthusiasm.
"I'll be there late, though." he cautioned. "I'll have to wake you up and everything."
I rolled my eyes. "I don't really mind. As long as you show up."
"You must be really desperate." he laughed. "Just kidding. Well, gotta go. Love ya, Bells."
"I love you too." I whispered after he hung up. I stared at the wall blankly, waiting for the loneliness to consume me.
"Bella?"
A heart-wrenchingly familiar voice echoed in my ears. I certainly hoped I wasn't losing my mind again. That voice---a velvet murmur---happened to be Edward Cullen's.
I didn't dare answer it.
"Bella, it's me." It continued. "Edward."
"No." I muttered. I would not answer the voice---it reminded of my ridiculous hallucinations of the past. I stared at the wall even harder, wishing it would just swallow me.
"Please answer me. I can't take this."
I finally turned around. There he was, in his Greek god-like glory, boring his ocher eyes into me. He was perched on the couch, watching me with an agonized glaze in his eyes.
I immediately shut my eyes. After feeling my heart thrash violently in my chest for a minute, I opened them again, fervently hoping he would be gone.
He wasn't.
"Gah." I shrank away from his pained glare, looking at the frames of the pictures on the wall. "I'm not going crazy. I'm not going crazy. I'm not going crazy."
"You're not going crazy." I heard him say in his typical annoyed tone. I knew him well enough to know that he was rolling his eyes. "I am actually here in your house."
"No, you're not."
Dang it---I had slipped, and was talking back to the illusion.
"Yes, I am." he said. "I need to talk to you, Isabella Swan."
"Don't do this to me." I bit my lip. "I don't want to talk to you."
"I just want you to understand---to consider your options." he paused. "To weigh your options. See what you have in front of you."
My heart skipped a beat. "I love Jacob Black, Edward. You can't do anything about that."
"Good. You're finally accepting that I'm here." he laughed nervously. "I'm trying to get you to see what you have, Bella."
"I don't want to see it."
"Stubborn as usual." He chuckled again, lowly. I cringed from the sound---so many painful memories flooded back. His tone turned serious, "Bella, I love you. I have always loved you, and will always love you. For as long as my existence."
I could feel gasps tearing out of my chests. "Get out of here. Go away." I felt like a five-year old, but I didn't want to hear his voice. The voice that so carefully composed my life when I moved to Forks---and the voice that had shattered it. All his voice was saying were lies. "Leave me alone."
"Bella." he breathed in my ear. I lurched---the intoxicating, sweet smell made my head dizzy. "I love you."
"N-no." I stuttered.
"I want you to choose me."
Sorry for the cliffy. I couldn't make this any longer. I promise I'll continue it in Bella's POV the next chapter, despite my new decision: I'll be alternating in Bella and Jacob's POV for chapters. I'm heading out to hang out with my friends---and when I return, I'll be watching NBC. Taylor Lautner is on SNL tonight. Guess who'll stay up to see it?
Bye.
-Alice
