Final chapter. Since reading this again, I re-discovered that I loved it. I hope you guys did too! Love the dear mischievous Itachi and the 'King of the fairies'; away-with-the-fairies Shikamaru. xD Review? Even if not; read on and enjoy.
Neji woke up in an unfamiliar bed, half-naked and his hair a complete wreck. He was about to freak out, when he discovered that there was a hot, also partially naked redhead curled up against his side, an arm possessively slung across his chest. As his eyes adjusted to the unfamiliar lighting, he realised that he was in Gaara's bed with him. Despite not remembering their trip from the Uchiha mansion, he was content, and wrapped an arm around Gaara, instantly falling back to sleep.
The first thing Sakura decided when she woke up was that she was very stupid, and quite hung over. Her eyes fluttered open and winced in the sunlight, spying a familiar face leaning down over her in concern.
"Sakura!" You're awake!" Lee exclaimed, and though his voice was a little too loud for the time of day, Sakura didn't find it troubling. She just smiled weakly as he beamed down at her with his eyes filled with joy over seeing that she was okay. Had he always radiated such happiness?
"Morning…Lee…" she managed to murmur out, and he looked overjoyed that she had spoken to him directly. As she blinked a few times, she found herself gazing up at him; intrigued.
Had Lee always been so cute?
Shikamaru was just about nodding off when Temari began to stir. Instantly, he was at her side.
"Temari?" he inquired quickly, bending down beside her as she groaned, rubbing her forehead. She looked up at him and blinked, as if confused.
"Shika?" she asked.
"How do you feel?" he queried.
"…Hung over," she muttered, "I feel like I've had the strangest dream…" Shikamaru suddenly tipped her chin up to his face and kissed her softly on the lips, "…What…what was that for?"
"Please don't ever leave me again," he whispered quietly, "I'm lost without you Temari."
"I should never have left you," she murmured, kissing him on the cheek beside his lips. "…Shika…I don't know what came over me…I…I should never have wanted Neji…"
"Forget it," Shikamaru assured her, "Forget it all. Just stay with me. I love you so much."
"…I'll always love you," Temari whispered, wrapping her arms around him, "Even when you forget our anniversaries and my birthday."
"I promise things will be different," Shikamaru promised, "I'll do better. You're worth it." She just smiled at him and lay down in his arms; where she knew she belonged. "Temari, we have class soon…"
"Now you decide to care about class?" Temari snorted, forcing him to lie down, "…Konoha doesn't need the King of the Fairies right now; his queen does."
Unlike his friends, Deidara didn't have the luxury of waking up slowly and growing accustomed to the situation he was in. He woke up suddenly and rather abruptly, his eyes snapping open to the sound of soft snoring.
The first thing he saw was his own arm curled across a sculpted abdomen. As he stared around in what might've been horror, he found that his head was rested rather comfortably on a strong chest, and that his hair was thoroughly tangled. Following the chest up to a head, he realised that the body he had been so comfortably snuggling against was none other than Hidan; and that they were both completely naked, one of Deidara's legs slung quite casually over one of Hidan's; his cock rubbing against a powerful thigh.
"Oh god, un!" Deidara yelped, and immediately made to leap out of bed. He got caught in the sheets and went plummeting to the floor, unimaginable pain shooting up his spine from his ass as it connected with the ground. Memories flashed through his mind of the night before as he stared at a dent in the door.
He remembered being pushed up against that door, his legs wrapped around Hidan's waist as he was raised and impaled upon his huge cock time and time again. He remembered throwing his head back and gripping Hidan's slick shoulders, moaning like a whore and begging for more, gravity forcing him down onto Hidan even deeper than before. His back had been slammed against the door with so much force that he was surprised it hadn't broken; Hidan had been relentless.
Then there was the memory of lying on his bed; Hidan's hot, sweating body above him, their hips connected and then disconnected time and time again with every sharp, pleasure-inducing thrust; Deidara's hard cock bouncing between them as Hidan kissed him deeply.
And then there was the image of Hidan beneath him as he rose and fell; forcing that enormous cock deep inside his abused hole. Hidan was thrusting upwards sharply and pushing Deidara's hips down to get as deep into his as he could. Deidara could've ridden that cock all night and not have gotten sick of how it made him feel; stretching him; hitting his prostate with nearly every thrust. He knew his expression was that of complete ecstasy, and when he and Hidan came together, he had become even more turned on by the feeling of warm cum leaking from his ass.
Deidara tried to move again, but found that anything other than remaining completely stationary sent a sharp pain through his body. He groaned in a low tone and managed to get back on the bed, lying on his side. His shuffling had apparently woken Hidan.
"Morning," he greeted in a husky voice that now sent a shiver down Deidara's spine, and then he did something that the blonde was not expecting; he leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. Deidara was too stunned to do anything except stare at him as Hidan threw off the sheets; completely ignoring the fact that he was stark naked until Deidara averted his eyes; blushing.
"Nothing you haven't fucking seen before, blondie," Hidan remarked with a small grin as he pulled on his pants, Deidara trying to cover up a little with the sheets and feeling something caked to what felt like the majority of his body. His face must've given away his disgust because Hidan just laughed again.
"…Maybe a shower before class?" he smirked, halfway through pulling on his shirt when, by impulse, he planted a kiss directly on Deidara's lips. He didn't pull away until Hidan finished half buttoning his shirt and headed to the door, smirking at the dent. Deidara didn't want to point out that Hidan couldn't have looked more like he'd just had sex if he tried. His hair was a mess, his buttons weren't done up correctly, and his pants were still partially undone. That; and he was carrying his shoes and smelled very strongly of sweat and sex.
The room stank of sex.
Deidara didn't even know what to say before the door slammed shut behind him and Hidan was gone. He gingerly took off the sheet and winced at the amount of dried cum that was caked to his legs and chest, grabbing a nearby towel and limping as best he could to the door. Every step was pure agony, but he couldn't help feeling that fuck had it been worth it.
He smiled to himself a little as he limped; remembering fondly the tender kiss Hidan had just placed on his cheeks and then his lips. That was when he caught sight of himself in the mirror and realised that the elder man had probably just been looking for a quick fuck.
"HIDAN!" he snarled in a shriek.
There was snickering in the boy's locker room, and Deidara was trying very hard to ignore it as he stalked in stiffly, trying to hide the limp that had hounded him all day. He obviously wasn't doing a very good job of it, because everyone in the room was staring; including all his friends.
Kiba was leaning against a locker trying very hard not to burst out laughing as he spied Deidara limping in with an incredibly pronounced limp; as though someone had jammed a rod up his ass.
Not only that, but there were about six poorly hidden hickeys clearly visible; riddling the blonde's neck and collarbone and Deidara looked clearly rather irritated. The other guys had stopped what they were doing and were watching him as he acted as though he didn't look like he had a skin disease. He managed to act completely natural as he pulled off his shirt…
And then everyone burst out laughing.
There were huge bruises in the shape of fingers on both the front and back aspects of Deidara's hips; obviously from where he had been brutally gripped; and his chest, and some of his back was coated in at least twenty hickeys. Deidara tried to maintain his dignity as he struggled with his shorts, glad that they couldn't see quite how far down the hickeys extended.
Hidan had arrived for basketball practice whilst the blonde was struggling with his clothes and trying to block out the laughter. He smirked when Deidara gave him a livid glare.
"…Fuck…who fucked you last night?" Kiba remarked, a snigger escaping against his will. Hidan raised an eyebrow; about to take claim for it, when Deidara just snapped, "Nobody in particular."
Ouch.
Pride wounded, Hidan flung down his bag aggressively and began getting changed in fuming silence. Kisame and Neji merely exchanged very knowing glances and Kisame barely managed to contain a snort, which Hidan unfortunately heard.
"You got a problem, shark boy?" he snarled instantly.
"…Not at all," Kisame assured him with a smug grin, "…I…nothing, Hidan…" He, Neji, Kiba, Shikamaru and Sasuke all just immediately turned away and headed out to their basketball practice.
Since it was such a nice day, Hinata had decided to go watch her cousin and boyfriend at practice; managing to pull Sakura and Temari along with her. Gaara, Naruto and Suigetsu were already sitting on the bleachers by the outside court as the basketball, volleyball and track teams began running their laps.
"What are you guys doing here?" Sakura inquired curiously. Gaara said nothing but flushed slightly.
"…Gaara wanted to come watch Neji but needed moral support so he didn't seem like a creep," Naruto replied brightly, to which he received an elbow to the gut, "Hey, come on man, it's true."
"I don't see what the big deal is," Suigetsu rolled his eyes, "I mean he stayed at your place last night…I think you're allowed to come watch him practice." The girls 'oohed' and Gaara gave them all death stares. Neji jogged past and flicked Gaara a small grin; to which they all proceeded to mock him for.
Lee was on the track team, and waved brightly to Sakura; to which she returned it with just as much enthusiasm.
"So you and Shikamaru are back together?" Sakura inquired, to deflect questions about why she was being so nice to Lee. Temari nodded shortly, "Hooray! The power couple of Konoha are back!"
"Stop saying that…" Temari rolled her eyes and sighed, spying Itachi coming over to join them, "Afternoon Itachi!"
"Have you seen Deidara?" Suigetsu chortled as the Uchiha joined them, "Fuck, it's hilarious!"
"Oh god, the amount of hickeys he has…" Sakura gasped. Suddenly, their discussion was abruptly halted by the fact that a small pile up had occurred nearby, with people rushing over to break up what appeared to be a fight. They all leapt up and headed over, when they recognised the familiar blonde and platinum haired heads that usually meant trouble.
As they arrived on the scene, it became apparent that Kisame was holding back Hidan, and Kiba was attempting to help a very sore, very stiff Deidara gingerly to his feet.
"What the fuck was that for, un?" Deidara snapped, pushing away Kiba's help and wrenching himself to his feet, despite the pain; for dignity's sake.
"Tell them," Hidan demanded, pushing Kisame aside, "Stop saying it was no one; fucking tell them." Deidara glowered, not wanting to cause a scene in front of everyone. He didn't want to out Hidan, and he sure as hell didn't want to seem as though their activities the night before meant more to him than what they probably meant to Hidan.
"I thought you'd rather keep it your shameful secret!" he snarled, gesturing at his chest, "I didn't ask for this, Hidan!"
"Well you were fucking begging for it last night," Hidan growled in a low tone and there was a sharp intake of breath, "It was all, 'fuck me harder, Hidan', 'fuck me again!' And now what; you're trying to act like nothing happened; seems like you're the one who wants to have a shameful secret!?" Someone appeared to have fainted. Itachi was positively gleeful; but kept his composure. "Fuck, I only slept with you because I thought you liked me and I'd do you a favour…"
"You'd do me a favour, un?" Deidara snorted angrily, "Are you kidding me? You're the one who was getting the favour…I felt sorry for you!"
"Hold the goddamn phone, blondie," Hidan growled menacingly, "You're the one that likes me; fuck, I heard fucking Sasuke and Kisame and the basketball guys talking about it in the locker room!"
"I heard from Suigetsu and Naruto that you liked me!" Deidara snapped, and the two of them looked from each other to their friends and then back again once they realised that their friends were looking far too angelic to be innocent.
"…What's fucking going on?" Hidan demanded to know.
"We've been tricked, un," Deidara growled accusingly looking at the group around them, "You don't like me?" Hidan made a scoffing noise.
"No, I hate you," he snapped, but Suigetsu heard the lie in his brother's voice.
"Well, I hate you too, un," Deidara sniffed back, folding his arms, "…So I fucking let you take my ass virginity for nothing, un…" Hidan raised an eyebrow; a little surprised at this information.
"So we hate each other and our stupid friends tried to get us to sleep together?" he glowered, looking for someone else to unleash his rage upon.
"Exactly, un," Deidara growled.
" –Succeeded in getting you to sleep together, it appears," Itachi suddenly spoke up, moving towards the front of the group and ignoring Hidan's deathly glares and mutinous mutterings. Of course it was Itachi. "…No need to look at me like that, Hidan…I think you might be interested in seeing something…"
Deidara's eyes widened. Was that…was that his sketchbook Itachi was holding.
"You didn't…" he breathed in disbelief.
"I suggest you lock your door, Deidara," Itachi advised, handing the book to Hidan, "Neji, Kiba, restrain him if you will…go ahead Hidan, have a look…" Deidara instantly lunged for the book but was caught by his two should-be-ex-friends and was restrained as Hidan flipped open the book and stared as he turned the pages.
"It's not what you think!" Deidara tried to shout, but felt his face growing increasingly red as Hidan's eyebrows rose in interest.
"…Seems you don't hate me as much as you say you do, blondie," he remarked quietly, and Deidara could've sworn he saw the elder man lick his lips slightly. He wanted to just go and die in a hole right then.
"Exhibit B!" Suigetsu suddenly proclaimed, leaping forwards to stand beside Itachi, whipping out a brown, leather-bound book. "Kisame, go!" Kisame instantly wrapped his arms around Hidan's chest to restrain him, the sketchbook falling to the ground; open on one of Deidara's sketches of Hidan pressing him against a wall.
"I'm going to fucking kill you, Suigetsu!" Hidan snarled, "Kisame, you're fucking next!"
"Hidan's journal," Suigetsu smirked, knowing that Kisame was strong enough to hold back his brother. He flicked open to one of the more recent pages and cleared his throat.
" 'I don't know what's wrong with me'," he read aloud, " 'I can't stop fucking thinking about him' –"
"…Hidan even swears when he writes?" Shikamaru remarked, and was quickly hushed.
" 'It can't be normal to think about someone this much. Whenever I'm around him I just want to…" Suigetsu was instantly cut off as Deidara snapped, "Let me see that!" and Hidan glared mutinously at his brother. Deidara read for a few moments, his face blushing in embarrassment as he read what Hidan had written that he wanted to do. After a tense silence, he finally looked at Hidan.
"You like me, un," he smirked, folding his arms smugly.
"You wipe that fucking smirk off your face or I'll fucking do it for you," Hidan snarled.
"I want to hear you say it," Deidara grinned.
"This is a fucking dangerous game you're playing, blondie…"
"You want to fuck me again," he began slyly.
"Say another word; it'll be your last!"
"You fucked me last night and enjoyed it."
"…Don't you fucking dare…"
"I wasn't the only one moaning…"
"DEIDARA, I'M WARNING YOU!"
"…Remember how you said I was the best sex you've ever had…"
"I'LL KILL YOU ALL!"
"Once wasn't enough…it took five…"
"Fine! I like you! I like you, Deidara!" Hidan yelled out; and then broke free from Kisame, wrapping Deidara in his arms and kissing him hard. Anything to stop more words from coming from that irritating mouth! It didn't take more than a few seconds for Deidara to relax and hungrily kiss him back. There was a chorus of wolf whistles, to which Hidan broke free from the kiss and aggressively announced,
"To whoever just did that; quit it before I fucking break your fucking necks."
"…I don't even know why I like you," Deidara commented flatly, rolling his eyes at Hidan's not necessarily idle threat, "But I do…" He dragged Hidan back in for another kiss.
"Hold on!" Sasuke growled, and everyone stared at him as he stepped forward to confront Itachi, "Really? That really worked? You tricked them into liking each other?" Hidan and Deidara's expressions soured, but listened as they broke apart, Hidan's hand resting firmly on the blonde's backside.
"I suppose I did," Itachi remarked with a superior smirk.
"And this has nothing to do with that 'Love in Idleness' magic drink that you have to make people fall in love?" Sasuke inquired darkly. Itachi feigned surprise, "You know the one I mean; the one you spiked my drink with that made Sakura and I fall in love with Naruto; and I'm guessing the one that made Temari fall in love with Neji?"
"You did what?" Temari growled.
"…What's not to say Temari didn't just fall in love with me?" Neji remarked, offended.
"Oh please, you can smell the gay on you a mile away," Sasuke rolled his eyes. Again, Neji looked offended, "And I saw you give something to Gaara…" Gaara's eyes widened and he looked over at Neji. Could…could that have been that drink he had at the bar that night? Itachi's smile widened.
"…Sorry to break the news to you, little brother," he replied, "…I put nothing in your drink. And Neji; Gaara; no need to look at each other like that; I did nothing to Gaara's drink."
"But I heard –"
"…If you thought you were going to fall in love with Naruto, you finally accepted that you did," Itachi clapped his hands together, "Sorry to inform you Naruto, but my baby brother genuinely does love you. It just took tricking him into thinking he'd drank a magic potion to make him admit it." Naruto sidled over to Sasuke with a raised eyebrow.
"Idiot," Sasuke greeted, not looking him in the eye.
"…So you do love me?" Naruto inquired. Sasuke looked away and mumbled something inaudible. "I'm sorry, bastard; what was that?"
"…Maybe."
"That's good enough for me!" he grinned, grabbing Sasuke's hand and entwining their fingers, reaching up to kiss him on the cheek. Sasuke flushed, bit his lip and then just decided 'to hell with it' and turned his head to kiss Naruto deeply on the lips. Again, there were the catcalls and the wolf whistles, which Naruto responded to with his middle finger. When they finally broke apart, Sasuke glared at Itachi as if to say 'are you happy?'
"Sakura, Temari, yes I may have used a magic drink on you," Itachi admitted, "…Twice…But it's all better now, right? Gaara likes Neji; Neji likes Gaara; I suppose with a little bit of my intervention…Hidan and Deidara…Kiba and Hinata…Temari loves Shikamaru again and Sakura's fallen in love with Lee…" Sakura instantly flushed and Lee punched the air in triumph as she looked embarrassed.
"…You set up Gaara and I?" Neji growled, highly affronted.
"I suppose I did," Itachi shrugged thoughtfully.
"Fuck y –" A hand was clamped over Neji's mouth.
"He means 'thank you'," Gaara translated, with a sly, sideways glance at the Hyuga.
"You see, happy endings for everyone," Itachi summarised.
"Not everyone," Sasuke remarked; a dangerous glint in his eye as he and Deidara exchanged glances. There was no way he was letting his brother get out of this scot free. "There's still you, Itachi."
"…What about me…" Suigetsu moped with a scowl, but was quickly silenced by Sasuke's glare. Sasuke and Deidara both looked at Itachi, who immediately felt feelings of dread surfacing as they both announced,
"Itachi's gay."
No glare had ever been colder than the one Itachi threw at his younger brother at that moment as several jaws dropped –but not as many as he expected. Kiba was one of the ones that practically choked on his next breath.
"Itachi's gay?" he exclaimed in disbelief, "What? Sasuke, how do you know?"
"I caught him making out with a guy," Sasuke smirked.
"Dei? How did you know?"
"…I was the guy he was making out with," Deidara replied sheepishly, pressing his cheek to Hidan's chest.
"You made out with my blondie?" Hidan suddenly growled in a low tone, about to advance forward, but was stopped by a large blue hand on his upper arm.
"I wouldn't touch Itachi if I were you," Kisame advised simply, "…I've been waiting for this to become public knowledge for quite some time and I would be rather unimpressed if you killed him before I got the chance to have sex with him."
Itachi's jaw dropped.
What was happening?
"…You want to have sex with me?" he asked flatly, not sure he had heard right.
"Are you fucking kidding me," Kisame rolled his eyes, "For a genius, you sure are stupid." Itachi floundered.
"…And…and what if I don't want to have sex with you?" he snapped, knowing he sounded like a child. There was snickering and a chorus of laughter from the watching crowd.
"...I really don't think that's an option after the amount of time I've spent waiting for you to admit it," Kisame smirked.
"Admit what?"
"Oh please, Itachi," Sasuke snorted, "Everyone knows that you're in love with him…"
"Everyone…" Itachi repeated weakly as he gazed at his friend group and they all nodded and smirked at him; minus a few people like Hidan and Kiba who naturally were surprised by this new titbit of information, "Why did no one bother to mention this to me?"
"It was pretty clear you had an image to uphold," Suigetsu shrugged, "And you were so absorbed in trying to hide how much you wanted Kisame's cock that you didn't even realise that he was in love with you too…"
That was it; Suigetsu was definitely not one of his favourite people right now. Kisame just chuckled and held Itachi against his chest with one arm around the elder Uchiha's stomach to prevent him from maiming Hidan's younger brother.
"Oh come on, Itachi," Sasuke rolled his eyes, "It's been like the two of you have been dating for the past four years."
"…Minus the sex," Kisame grumbled, and Itachi found himself fighting back a blush as Kisame's other hand inconspicuously came to rest against his ass.
"…Says the kid who only realised he was in love with his best friend after being tricked into thinking he'd been dosed with a magic potion," Itachi snapped back, very irritated at how the tables had been turned on him; but not able to find it in himself to pull away from Kisame's chest. Sasuke promptly closed his mouth, but added, "Mother knows," accompanied by a small smirk.
Itachi wanted the ground to swallow him whole. He looked over his shoulder at Kisame, his eyes begging him to say it wasn't true.
"…She's already planning our wedding," he informed him.
"I knew there was a reason you were sucking up," Itachi growled, glaring at him accusingly. Kisame just grinned his toothy grin that Itachi loved so much, and then, without warning, leaned down and pressed his lips against his best friend's. After a few seconds of kissing back, Itachi pulled away, highly affronted.
"You could at least ask me out before just kissing me!" he snapped irritably.
"You tricked Hidan and Deidara into sleeping together; you get no such privileges," Kisame smirked, and spun him around, kissing him again.
This time, Itachi cockily pressed his tongue against Kisame's lips, and then found his own tongue forced back into his mouth as Kisame quickly asserted his dominance and deepened the kiss.
"Well fuck me sideways," Hidan remarked, watching the two of them and finding that maybe, yes, it was turning him on just a bit to see two guys making out; Kisame's hands eagerly groping at Itachi's ass, and Itachi not complaining. He looked down at Deidara, who just looked up at him cheekily and pressed back against his hand. Hidan couldn't resist a grope; not when he saw that Deidara's eyes were clearly expressing that he wanted a bit more than groping.
"It's about fucking time," Sasuke muttered, rolling his eyes at his brother's display.
"Does this mean I'm your boyfriend?" Naruto inquired curiously, shaking the hand that was connected to Sasuke's.
"Idiot."
"That means you have to come to the arcade with me," he grinned mischievously, kissing his cheek. "Because boyfriends do that kind of stuff together." Sasuke glared at him. Kiba smiled down at Hinata as she leaned against him shyly, and kissed her forehead -an action that was not lost on Neji; whose eyes narrowed.
"Let it go," Gaara sighed.
Shikamaru wrapped an arm around his girlfriend; the love of his life, and as he always did, observed his friend group. It had been a crazy last couple of weeks, but in a roundabout way…Itachi had fixed things…and now…what could be better? Itachi broke away from the kiss to look over at the King of the Fairies, who caught his gaze and smiled, both thinking back to their talks in English class.
Give me your hands, if we be friends, and Itachi shall restore amends*
And there we have it; the end. Thanks for sticking with it; hope you enjoyed it! Let me know what you thought!
YAY FOR KISAITA! How many of you picked up on Kisame liking Itachi? So cute! xD Hooray! My fics are finally all together!
*Give me your hands if we be friends, and Robin shall restore amends" -A Midsummer Night's Dream.
I love Shakespeare. "A Midsummer Night's Dream" and "Much Ado About Nothing" were the plays that this fic stemmed from; if you're familiar with either/both, I hope you picked up on some of the similarities!
xx K
