Hello! Oh my gosh, I was so happy to see all of the reviews! Yes, I loved getting all fluffy in that chapter, but as usual, I had to kill the moment with a good ol' attempted suicide. Well, read on, my friends. Here comes chapter 11! Warning, though: It may be a short one!
Sam Winchester remembered the Pit. He remembered being the chew toy of Lucifer and Michael, and he sure as hell remembered feeling the presence of the fallen archangel hitching a ride in his flesh. But now that he sat with Dean on the steps to the abandoned warehouse, he realized that no memory could ever prepare him for what it felt like to actually be an angel. It was that rush of power, that exhilaration, that feeling of pure freedom that gave Sam such euphoria and unhindered joy. It was those feelings that allowed him to go flying with Gabriel or just smite any monster he encoutered. Sam was happy as an angel. Of course, that would never matter if Dean ever succeeded in committing suicide.
Ever since Sam's older brother had attempted to slit his own wrists in the driver's seat of the Impala, Dean had always carried the angel sword in that leather sheath at his waist. It was ready for a deadly use that Sam dreaded. However, every time that Dean raised the holy blade to any one of his many body parts, Sam would fly in and knock his brother unconscious. And then Dean would wake up an hour later, bound to his bed while Sam ranted and raved about how 'life's a precious thing' and 'do you think this would make Castiel happy, to know that you want to end yourself?' And Dean would apologize, lying through his teeth about how he'd never do it again, blah, blah, blah.
The thing was, it had happened nine times now.
Dean Winchester remembered Hell. He remembered enduring every moment of thirty years of being torn to shreds, day after day. He remembered saying yes to that dickhead Alastair and making that first cut into a screaming soul. And he remembered clawing himself out of his grave, courtesy of a very special angel. But he was never prepared for the moment that he realized that his angel had disappeared into the inner workings of Heaven. It was that spike of loss, that crashing wave called loneliness, that anger and hurt being contained to a single human that had gotten him this way. He knew that he could fly to Heaven a any time to be with Cas, but he knew that it would do no good for either of them. The darkness that welled up in his heart was inescapable by flight or by just getting Cas back without a fight. Dean had to settle this the Winchester way.
He had to kill every holy bastard that had touched his angel.
Sure, killing himself wouldn't really be beneficial to his operation, but he needed to keep his adrenaline up. He needed to watch as his blood drained away, only to be saved at the last moment by Sam. For once, Dean realized with a mirthless chuckle, his baby brother was the one being the protector. Not the other way around. Truth be told, Sam had taken care of himself for years now. He'd only needed that little boost that Dean had given by, oh, selling his soul. Oh, and that time when Sam had gotten high on demon blood and started the freaking apocalypse! No biggie. Dean knew that he'd done some idiotic things for his brother, but Sam wasn't such a saint either. But of course, Dean just had to forget all of those times when Sam had gotten possessed, when he'd been without a soul, or when he'd thrown himself at the Devil, Michael, and a giant hole into hell. Not to mention when Sam had risked his own life until he was inches from death and Dean was having a goddamned heart attack from fear and stress and guilt.
But that was all water under the bridge now, wasn't it?
Gabriel lay on his back in the soft, queen-sized bed that he'd poofed up in his and Sam's curtained-off haven. His Sasquatch was cuddled up beside him, his deep breaths tickling Gabe's neck and chin. The former Trickster stroked at Sam's luscious chestnut locks, letting the silky strands fall aimlessly past his fingers. Sam stirred at the touch - damn, that kid's hair was sensitive - and woke up, stretching with that cute little tired groan that drove Gabe crazy. "Morning, sunshine," Gabriel whispered, grinning cheekily at his lover's face while poking Sam's nose. The hunter playfully swatted away his angel's hand, replacing the annoying touch with a peck on the lips.
"Hey." Sam struggled to sit up; Gabriel's arms were wrapped in a vicelike grip on his waist, so it was a bit of a challenge. "What's up in the world of the tiniest archangel in existence?" He grinned at the affronted look on Gabe's face and began to laugh. Gabriel retaliated by digging his hands deeper into Sam's lower back, tempting a groan of pain/pleasure from the human. "Uncalled for," Sam grunted grumpily. "I was just joking, so you don't have to go and be a tease about this."
"What are you talking about?" Gabe looked up at his human with his trademark 'I'm so innocent' eyes. "I wasn't doing anything like THIS." As he said the last word, Gabriel detached one of his arms from Sam's waist and trailed his fingers down the human's chest, skittering down towards the thin cotton boxers. They rested lightly on the front of the boxers, delicately tapping out a rhythm that made Sam groan with want. "What's that, Sammy?" Gabe smirked up at Sam, who had his 'this is a bitchface but I really want you to have sex with me right now' bitchface on. Sam's eyes were annoyed and begging at the same time. "Sorry, Sam, I didn't catch that last thing that you said." Gabriel smiled his very best Trickster smile and removed his hand, much like the way that Sam had totally ripped him off that first day in Hawaii. "I am the Trickster, Sammy. Now you've got your just desserts."
Sam glared playfully at Gabe and swung his legs off the bed, reaching over to his duffel bag. As he stripped off his dirty shirt, Gabriel couldn't help but reach out and stroke his feather on Sam's incredibly muscled chest. It had become a favorite pasttime of his, just sitting with Sam and talking and observing. Sam would, it turn, lightly skitter his fingertips over the angry red scar that stretched across his angel's abdomen, courtesy of Lucifer. It was just the little things that reminded them that neither of them was truly human, no matter how they acted. Throughout Gabe's epiphany, Sam had changed his shirt and was buttoning his pants by the time that Gabriel woke up from his little soul-searcher trip. Gabe, observing the trouble that Sam had gone to in order to get dressed, merely snapped his fingers and was instantly clad in faded blue jeans and a wine-red shirt. "Smooth," Sam snorted, and then he pushed his way through the ratty curtains and entered the main warehouse. Gabriel followed, though at a slower pace. He knew what to expect.
Glares of suspicion immediately snapped onto the faces of the angels that sat at the large, round pine table. Circiel's glare was more of a sneer, really, the little smartass that she was. Saziel was frowning; Alariel had his eyes cast down; Hadriel and Eltrael were scowling at him, and Kyriel just pointedly turned her back. They still didn't trust their older brother, not after they'd found out what Gabriel had done to Cas when he'd been brainwashed by God. Sam instinctively shifted his position into an admittedly intimidating stance, one that placed his archangel in Sam's range of protection. Gabe smiled up at his protector, whispering, "Thanks, Sammy." Sam just grinned in a Trickster-worthy fashion and put his arm around Gabe. Sam steered the two of them away from the hostile angels and moved towards Dean's 'room.'
"We have to check on him," Sam commented worriedly, running his free hand through his hair.
Gabe snorted. "What for? The kid can take care of himself."
Sam's affectionate gaze turned to fury. "For God's sake, Gabriel, he's suicidal! I can't leave him alone for five minutes without coming back to him about to slit his wrists! I can't believe you just said that to me!" The hunter scowled and shrugged out of Gabriel's reach, ignoring the archangel's calls of 'Sammy!' He shoved aside the curtain to Dean's room and vanished inside, leaving Gabriel to stand there like an idiot. With nothing more to do, he snapped up a beanbag chair and some M&M's and waited for his little bitch of a boyfriend to return.
Damned hunters. They think they know everything and are all high and mighty. Well, I've got news for you: if anyone is high and mighty, it's angels. Literally. Oh, and Sammy, playing the suicide card? Uncalled for. Though I do have to admit that you are the one thing keeping me out of the reach of God, so...I guess I owe you a measly apology. Just one, though. I may have a soft spot for you, but I'm still Mr. Badass Holy Archangel Policeman of My Father. Hell, yeah, I am.
With that little guilt speech set in his mind, Gabriel stood up, dusted the M&M's wrappers off of his lap, and strode over towards Dean's room. As he approached, he could hear hushed voices inside. One was clearly that of his Sasquatch; the other was Dean.
"De, this has gone way too far. You're blowing this way out of proportions."
"Oh, really? Yeah, I'm sure that I'm totally overreacting here."
"Yeah, you are! When I lost Gabe, I didn't try to off myself every day!"
"Oh, because you didn't start a fucking war in Heaven or anything, Sam! I'm sure I'm totally imagining that you did that, Sam. I guess I'll just add that to the list of things that you say are wrong with me. And trust me, it's one hell of a list."
"For the love of God, why won't you just leave me alone and come fight the fucking war instead of moping about it? I think that Cas is our highest priority right now, and if you haven't noticed already, he's in Heaven! You know, where the war is?"
Gabriel could hear the cold steel in Dean's voice as he answered. "Sam, I know that you care about me and all, but how about you go off and be pretty while I get ready for this fight? I don't see Gabriel or any of the other guys trying to pressure me into this. Of course, Gabe always did follow you like a lapdog, so I'm guessing he's with you on this."
Sam's hateful silence made Gabe's fists clench. Say something! he wanted to scream, but he had to let Sam respond to this one. "Dean, what the hell are you playing at? Do you really think that by insulting Gabe, you can get somewhere? You're a fucking child, Dean! That's what you are! And once you get your act together and realize that Cas is dying while you play with knives, you come and talk to me." With that, Sam stormed out of Dean's room, and before he trotted after Sam, Gabriel could catch a glimpse of Dean standing by the curtain. His eyes were cold, and a sneer of hatred was growing on his face. In that split second, Gabe could barely see the brief flash of wings that exploded from Dean's back before they disappeared again and left Gabriel wondering if he had just imagined it all.
Yes, it was short. Sorry, but I needed a filler chapter of angst and rivalry and stuff before the big fight chapter. What do you think? Well, you know how to tell me what you think, don't you? Reviews, my friends. Reviews are the key to me ever finishing this story. And if you don't, you'll always be left wondering which AWESOME character I was going to reincarnate in the rest of the story. Whoops, too bad! So, review!
Love and unicorns forever,
ImpalaAngel13
