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An: Sorry for the long delay in posting another chapter.
At the mouth of the Ibi River, Sesshomaru stood on a hill above the tributary staring at the clear peaceful horizon. He looked around the wide expanse of land which was almost bare, stripped of the magnificent trees and vegetation by humans as their numbers grew and with it more need for shelter.
The air was completely still, yet a troubling thought murmured inside his head. The time would come when the human world and the demon one would separate into two realms. It was nature's way to ensure symmetry in the world.
Humans far outnumbered his kind. Their lifespan was short but they made up for the shortcoming by breeding very rapidly, which was significant to their survival, but deadly to his species survival. Demon-kind was nature's offspring, and without the intrinsic magic of its essences living as spirits within the trees of the forest they would wither and die. Lesser youkai needed the shelter of the woodlands to hide and to live in seclusion.
Regardless of that, humans continuously rape and pillaged the land, desecrating the enchantment of the wilds with no real thought of the consequences. And for those of his kind, who could endure until the very end would have the kami's to thank for their compassion. The signposts would be there for them to see and follow to their definitive salvation.
He sighed softly before walking away from the cliff's edge. His thoughts if he allowed them to continue on that same unsavory path could become quite bothersome. He frowned. Why worry about the inevitable when that emotion wouldn't change anything? He made a tight fist; he was strong and would remain unbending till the end of time.
His steps took him to a network of twisted vines running along the ground that crept around the base and trunk of a massive black pine. He stopped and glanced up; noticing that the tree was dying but still had enough vibrant branches on its right for shelter. He stood still for a moment longer letting the light and darkness filtering through wash over him.
He inhaled sharply and then sat down after the fading sunlight warmed not only his body but his mind. The atmosphere though peaceful was brought to life with the delightful songs of nesting birds. All else was quiet from the mountains at his back to the western horizon. It was the first time in days that he would be able to relax, letting go of his troubles and take a much-needed break from his duties. He watched attentively as snatches of light played across the terrain in ever deepening shades of gray and orange as the sun began to set.
In time shadow took the place of light and soon it was dark, the moon rose full and round high in the sky. Now in the darkness and solitude, thoughts of his dead brother's wife occupied his mind. She was the most intriguing mixture of confidence and fire, and undoubtedly a threat to his sanity.
He recalled her sensual aroma that heightened his arousal each time that she was close and he did the unthinkable, he lusted. She was the untamed wind fanning his flames, soaring, burning brightly then dimming so low that the contradictions made him anxious. He yearned for her in the privacy of his mind alone at nights. Even now he wished to hold her close to breathe her fire if only to burn.
He shook his head slowly and then lowered it to the forest floor, his mind a convoluted mess of emotions. He told himself that he didn't care for her; this was simply a case of unbridled lust. So why then was his heart and mind consumed with her beautiful image and smile?
With a little humph, he turned his head to the sky. The full moon a good omen that complimented his nature, staring at it brought him tranquillity. Tomorrow would be a year since Inuyasha's death and he would pay his brother a visit, but for now he needed to rest; if only he could get that wretched woman off his mind he would be able to accomplish it.
Seconds passed into minutes, minutes built into hours, nevertheless sleep eluded him. He closed his eyes willing the sleep to come so as to silence the thoughts of the priestess, but to no avail. He watched and waited, ever patient growing angry, but still slumber would not come to give him the respite that he needed so badly.
At the crack of dawn, the wait ended. He slowly got up and proceeded to the river, he needed to bathe to be rid of the desire that had consumed his being like wild-fire and to clear his thoughts. The icy waters were before him now, his eyes fixed on it as he remembered the passion that they'd shared that day on the banks of the river. He shook his head, clearing his mind and swiftly undressed.
Lowering himself into the cold waters sent a chill throughout his body; he settled the shock to his system with a deep snort and closing of his eyes. While he rested in the river Sesshomaru felt as if he was trying to find his way through a dense fog that got thicker and heavier with each faltering step that he made. Making it hard to see and to breathe, he felt blinded by emotions that he never thought he had.
He couldn't think straight in the quagmire, but he knew one thing for certain, the priestess had left an impressive mark in his head and on his heart and now he was having one hell of a time sorting everything out. If he gave in and took the woman for himself. Would it mean that he would have broken his promise to his brother?
At this point in time, he wasn't certain what he wanted, but the complicated ethics of the problems were a preferable focus rather than the constant lust that he felt in his loins for the woman. Throughout his long life he had consorted with many women but never one this conflicting. He shook his head. He just did not know. Should he he to be the one to save them both from their pride and stubbornness?
His dreams and thoughts of Kagome were a reservoir of substance echoing in his mind; he heard every judgment, every question, every careful answer and every prideful rejection, confusing him and making a mess of his mind. There were not many assurances in life, but there were warnings and terrible consequences for an unsure footfall.
As explanations went, he was sorely lacking in relevant points when it came to love, having no point of reference, never loving except with his body alone he was ignorant of his failings. He only knew that what he felt needed careful thought, but on the other hand, he had never denied himself anything that he truly desired.
He exited the water and gazed at the sky; the heavens had become brighter with the daylight. The worst of his thoughts he didn't want to think about but neither would they be put to rest. They appeared large and impenetrable in his mind like the green, stony expanse of the western mountains, and still, he would carry on.
sksksk
The long wait had finally ended; it was dawn and the day of Inuyasha's memorial service. Her satchel was already packed with a few things that she would need while she was in Edo. She tried to leave the house as silently as she could, taking small unhurried steps along the wooden flooring, but a shy voice calling her name made her aware that her efforts were not at all convincing.
She turned around in the dim light of the hall and saw the dark-haired demoness watching her nervously. She smiled sheepishly having been caught trying to leave unseen, however, it was much more than that. She knew instinctively that although Jun and Momo acted relaxed around her, they still feared her a bit.
It didn't come as a shock to her that all in the house except for Sesshomaru was cagey around her because she was a priestess. She smiled genuinely at the female this time and it put her at ease. Now she could inform her of her plans.
"Jun I am leaving for Edo shortly and it wasn't my intent to wake you, I would have been gone for no more than a day," Kagome said softly, while the demoness eyed her with scepticism.
"Mistress," the demoness said sternly, "the lord will be back this afternoon and I am sure that he would not be pleased on his return to find you gone and to hear that neither Momo nor me know of your whereabouts."
She could hear it clearly, the obvious reprimand and disapproval in the servant's tone and wasn't bothered by it. The female was employed by Sesshomaru to care for her and if she had succeeded in leaving without being seen, then the maid would have been in a bind when the Daiyoukai returned.
"I am sorry, I wasn't thinking," she said apologizing.
Jun nodded but scowled deeply while Kagome looked on wondering what could be the matter with her. They stayed silent staring at each other for some time before the priestess spoke up.
"I will see you tomorrow," she said and turned quickly towards the door again. She needed to get to her destination early to help with the festivities.
"Lady Kagome please wait!"
The unexpected plea stopped her immediately. She turned around with a worried expression on her face.
Jun sighed loudly enough for her to hear. "Mistress, I know that yours and the lord's affairs are a private matter," she said nervously, watching and gauging Kagome's body language, she saw nothing out of the way to suggest that the priestess was upset and so cautiously she continued.
"I couldn't help overhearing the contents of your disagreement…twice," Kagome's brows rose in response to the declaration.
"Is that so?" She asked with sarcasm. Their arguments had been loud enough for anyone with normal hearing to hear, it was noisy and violent, and with heightened senses that demons possessed, hers and Sesshomaru's quarrel must have been quite a racket. Kagome smiled.
The demoness stared at her puzzled but chose to continue regardless. "If I may can I offer you some advice?"
Kagome shot her a quick glance. "Yes you may,"she said impatiently; though she was curious to hear what the demoness had to say she needed to leave as well.
"I have never seen the lord behave quite like this before now, and I believe you are the cause of his afflictions. He loves you but he fights with himself over it,"she paused and stared directly at Kagome who inched back from the uneasy stare.
Her lips quivered a little before she continued, and Kagome wondered what Jun was contemplating to make her so uncomfortable, however, she didn't need to ponder on it for much longer.
"You fight and challenge his authority as the head and a demon recklessly. I believe if you were someone else he would have killed you already," the last part was said so low that Kagome almost missed it. She gasped when she looked into the demoness's eyes and saw no apology only the truth.
She was at a loss for words at the moment and what she wanted to say was slow in coming, but when it did it was laced with vehemence. "I only fight with him because he is an arrogant bastard that only wants things to go his way and another thing, he doesn't love me, he only wants to possess me and I refuse on that premise."
"Such strong words," Jun rebutted immediately, "but how do you know what the lord feels in his heart, have you ever taken the time to find out what he likes and what he is about?"
Kagome froze at the harsh comment and stared at Jun for long, there was a bright sparkle in her eyes and Kagome was glad to see that Jun was serious but did not hold a grudge against her. They both held different beliefs on the situation but at least it was not enough to cause a problem.
Without responding she smiled once more and then left the demoness standing alone in the hallway. Could she be right? Kagome wondered as she made her way outside looking for Ah-Un. No, she answered herself; he doesn't know the meaning of the word love, and she would be foolish to believe such a thing. It would be best if she lived her own life and not think too much about him.
Kagome rode in silence for a long time reflecting on Jun's words to her about Sesshomaru, and yet she couldn't accept it. Too much bad things had happened between them and only a miracle would change her opinion of him.
She felt tears pooling in her eyes when the dragon went airborne. She had behaved foolishly and was suffering because of it. No more would she let Sesshomaru occupy her mind and heart. It's been months since he had spoken to her and slowly she was adapting to the changes.
But if that was so, then why did she feel so miserable and empty without him? She made a frustrated sound and shook her head fiercely willing the confusions away. Today was her husband's memorial service and she would not think about anything else.
She reached Edo around mid-morning and on a whim decided to stop by her old home. To her surprise, it seemed like half of the slayer's village was already in her yard occupying themselves with some activity that had to do with the celebrations. She was stunned but happily so.
There was no time to waste, she led Ah-Un quickly to the back of the property and turned to leave, then halted when she remembered something. She approached the beast slowly and whispered near its left ear. "Stay here I will call when I am ready."
There was so much left to do and she needed to get busy and help with whatever she could. She spotted Katsumi one of Songo's direct descendants building a fire pit in the yard and assisted her. When they were done, their combined effort constructed a pit that was large enough to contain five different cooking pots.
Her old home was abuzz with activity. Small children made images of animals from colorful paper, along with the more professional artwork and spread them along multiple lines erected all around the yard. Firecrackers were placed on poles at different intervals.
It was perhaps mid-day when all the cooking and decorations were done. Kagome went inside to bathe and dress. Katsumi had informed her earlier while they'd worked side by side that the head-stone was already at the Tree of Ages, and when she was finished they would all meet up there.
After cleansing herself she removed a beautiful lavender kimono that Sesshomaru had gifted her with from her bag. It was of the finest silk; she rubbed the fabric along her cheeks and closed her eyes at the soft downy feel of the texture.
Afterward, she rests the garment down gently on the bed and went to sit on a stool in front of her old vanity. She brushed her long wavy hair until it shone, then parted it across the middle and twisted the front portion in a loose bun, the rest she left loose down her back.
She wanted to look beautiful for Inuyasha, he would not like it even in death if he knew that she was unhappy and mourn for him still.
The white pearl powder that she dusted on her face gave it a dry cool look, she stained her lips blood red, and her eyelids lids she lined an obscure black. She stood back and looked at her reflection and did not recognize the beautiful woman that stared right back at her. How could that be her when she did not feel beautiful or loved?
Automatically she reached for the rich lavender kimono and adorned herself; it fitted snugly, hugging the swell of her bosom and every curve of her hips and bottom. She didn't care for the elaborate obi so she tied a simple bow to the back of her dress and slipped her feet into a pair of slippers. She took one last lingering look at her image and then left the house.
Kagome whistled softly, and the dragon carefully approached the doorway where she stood, his hooves sending small amounts of dust in the air. Whistling to call him was a trick that she had developed over the months as the beast had become one of her closest companions.
The animal lowered himself to the ground and Kagome climbed onto his back, and in no time at all, she was near the gravesite. She dismounted some distance away and walked the remainder of the way to the site to prevent the uneasy stares upon Ah-Un.
A hush fell over the group when she appeared standing alone in a sheer kimono of the deepest lavender and patterns of the lightest purple. Her movements were lithe and sinuous, that many men noticed her. But one, in particular, a very handsome dark brown haired man could not tear his gaze away from the stunning vision. He felt his blood rise hot and heavy.
The ceremony proceeded without any problems; all who remembered the half demon spoke favorably of him. The monk prayed for Inuyasha's soul and wished him peace. Kagome took her time when it was her turn to speak, she didn't cry this time, Inuyasha while alive never did like to see her cry.
The stone was erected at the head of the grave and cemented into the dirt so that it could not be unearthed, then two girls around age eight planted flowers around the site. When the ritual was over, all in attendance made their way back to Kagome's former home for the celebrations.
But somewhere between coming to the gravesite and leaving, a burgeoning load of depressing emotions began to assault her mind and body. She felt a prickling at her nape and began to sweat. The world spun out of control, catching her into its spiralling empty depths, it flung her recklessly around into a whirlwind of debris, smashing her mind into bits.
She held her head in her hands trying to remain steady, but still fell to her knees staining the exquisite kimono brown; she felt cold and lonely even though she had friends. What was happening? She couldn't tell, she felt faint and choked out a desperate sob. Taking long deep breaths helped to calm the frightening anxieties. She sighed and stumbled towards her ride, leaving the scene of her past.
The day progressed as she had hoped; except, everyone present was having fun except her. The more emptiness filled her heart the more she filled it with sake, she wasn't drunk yet, she was almost there. Faces blurred, one running into the next, her mind clouded, her stomach queasy and she couldn't differentiate who was who.
Musicians played beautiful music filling the night with magic; she tried to dance but stumbled over the long kimono each time. Soft cinnamon eyes watched the striking sad woman the entire time and decided just now to go talk to her.
A handsome man approached her when the sun had set and lighted lanterns along with the full moon were their source of light now. The light and shadows cast an ethereal glow on his face. Inebriated now, she pressed up against him with the sake bottle dangling from one hand.
"My wine is finished could you get me another?" She asked, her speech slurring with each word that she'd spoken.
He laughed showing even white teeth. "I don't think that you need another drink," he said politely.
"I will decide what I want for myself," Kagome argued, and moved abruptly away from the gentleman only to fall onto her hands and knees into the dirt. He approached and helped her to her feet by lifting her up by the arm.
Her feet were unsteady and she leaned onto his side for support. He looked down and saw how tired she was and offered to assist her.
"Lady Kagome would you like me to take you inside?"
Without answering she moved away from him again staggering as she did, he grasped her arm holding her firmly and led her down the path to her front door. On the inside, she directed him to her bedroom where he laid her down.
"Goodnight lady Kagome, rest it will do you some good,"he advised.
She rose up on her elbows flushed and realized that the handsome stranger watched her. She felt nauseated and her throat dry. She looked at him carefully or tried to do so but her mind was muddled by the liquor, all she felt now was a need, an intense feeling of loss and loneliness and she did not want to be alone.
"Please don't go!" She said almost pleadingly, as he turned his back and was about to leave.
His eyes narrowed and he turned right back around and stared at her in bewilderment. "Kagome Sama I am a man and you are a beautiful woman, to stay here with you tonight would be unwise."
"Stay," was the simple one-word command.
He was awestruck as he should be, the most beautiful woman that he had ever seen had just offered him something that he would cherish for ten lifetimes. He removed his outer garments, entered the bed and snuggled closely behind the desirable woman in front of him
sksksk
Sesshomaru had just left his brother's grave with the realization that the humans had made some changes. His sensitive ears heard music, shouting and merriment of many individuals coming from Kagome's old home. It was none of his business but as usual, when it came to the priestess he could not resist the urge to see her.
He knew that she was in the village; her scent was one that he could never forget or doubt. Just the thought of seeing her again made him feel lighter. Perhaps this time they could really sit down and talk. He had never been a coward, and what he felt within, he was willing to face again. The time that he'd spent alone with his thoughts he'd come to accept certain facts.
sksksk
Kagome turned into the arms of her nameless lover and felt the hammering of both their hearts. A vision of Sesshomaru's face crossed her mind in that moment and she closed her eyes tight, she would not think about him now, that selfish cruel being that had no capacity for emotions much less to love. Tonight she would let someone else hold her close, perishing the thoughts of him.
Hot lips touched hers when her breath met his face and they burned with a consuming fire. She was aware even in drunkenness that she was giving herself to a stranger, but somehow she didn't care.
She needed to be loved and wanted, to feel alive, and even if it was just for one night she would burn with passion. She wouldn't think too much on it now, tomorrow she would regret if there was something to regret, but for now she would live.
When at last they were both naked, his kisses seared her lips and body. He was slow and tender, and when he took her, joining them as one in a loving embrace of penetrating bliss, she melted with the desire. Their bodies moved together, not like strangers, but like old lovers dancing and crying out in the crispy night air.
sksksk
Sesshomaru halted upon hearing Kagome's cries of passion. Then silently, in disbelief he entered the house from the back and saw her naked form writhing beneath another man. He stared for awhile, gritting his teeth before quietly leaving.
As he walked into the darkness of the chilly night it felt as though the cold mist that touched his skin had turned to steam and he was burning up with misery and pain.
His hands had trembled as he'd watched and murderous thoughts had billowed inside his heart, but he'd willed the rage away. The woman wasn't his and he had not made his intentions known to her. He had no rights to dictate what she did with her life.
Then why did the memory of their time together fill his heart even now? Perhaps because he had weighed her sweet heavy breast against his hand, taste the ripeness of them and her luscious lips. He had gotten drunk from the sweet nectar of her blood and womanhood, and now he longed for her again.
He shook his head slowly, wishing fervently that he hadn't given any heed to her welfare and what she'd thought of him then. He should have just taken her when he had the chance.
Jun - Obedient
Momo - Peach
