State of the Union

Chapter 11

Beckett's fist connected with the punching bag with a satisfying thud. Sweat dripped from her hairline, threatening her eyes, but she didn't stop her assault, landing blow after blow to the hard, red, vinyl casing.

The standing punching bag had been an impulse buy, but given the free space in the otherwise empty second bedroom, Kate had no regrets. Her left leg came up in a roundhouse kick and a grunt echoed off the cool, cream walls.

Part of her had wanted to march straight into the Oval Office and give him a piece of her mind, the rest wanted to curl up in the corner and berate herself for her own stupid fairytale ideals. The President of the United States falling in love with a secret service agent? It was something out of a cheesy romantic comedy she would watch with her mother and a bottle of pinot noir.

Another growl erupted from her throat when her cell chirped from the corner, interrupting her continued pummeling of the bag. She had half a mind to ignore it and continue her assault but instead she ripped off her right glove and stalked across the room, not even bothering to look at the number before snapping into the receiver.

"What?"

"Good morning to you too, Katherine."

"Mom," Kate sighed, sagging against the wall, wiping ineffectually at her brow with the back of her still-gloved left hand. All the fight drained from her body.

"I would ask what's wrong but I saw the news this morning."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Kate replied, ripping off her other glove before chucking it and its mate into the plastic bin in the far corner of the room.

"I am perfectly fine. In fact, I'm better than fine," she continued, padding her way into the kitchen to pour a glass of water from the pitcher in the fridge. "2014 is a brand new year. I'm considering a new look, maybe joining a couple dating sites. Hell, I may go crazy and get a cat. I hear the shelter has an adoption fair coming up over the weekend."

"Kate, I know you're upset…"

"I'm not upset. Why would I be upset? Because a man with whom I am not in a relationship and who is my boss's boss's boss is dating another woman? I have absolutely no right to be upset over that."

"Katie," her mother chided gently her childhood nickname on the other end of the line and Kate slid down the wall onto the cool kitchen tile, all her bluster and bravado melting away.

"I kissed him, mom. I kissed him and he gave me this gorgeous Christmas present. It was perfect, something out of a dream, and then he lied to me. He lied and I had to find out from Alexis that he's dating someone else. And then, then, he had the gall to invite me to have coffee with them. I'm humiliated and pissed off."

There was silence on the other end of the phone and Kate pulled it away from her ear with a frown, checking to make sure the seconds of the call were still ticking by.

"Mom?"

"He kissed you?" The reply came slowly over the phone.

Kate winced as she bit her lip. "Well, technically I kissed him, but… yes?"

"And you, someone who works everyday inside the White House, had no idea he was dating someone else?"

The blush worked its way up Kate's neck, heat radiating from her clavicles to the tips of her ears.

She spoke her next words through a clenched jaw. "What exactly are you insinuating?"

"Nothing, Katie," Johanna continued. "I just think you should talk to him is all."

Kate's head fell back against the wall, bottle of water dangling from her fingertips between propped knees.

Talk. Right.


It took Kate the weekend, and an onslaught of news articles, tabloid covers, and late night talk show punch lines, to gather the courage and the words to confront Castle. Then, Alexis started back to school on that Monday and Castle was halfway to Germany for a meet and greet with the Chancellor, "Freddy", and the European Union, before the last bell.

By the time Air Force One landed back at Andrews Air Force Base later that week, Kate had lost her courage again. It wasn't until the next Monday, when Kate watched from the couch in her apartment, assured that Alexis would be in the capable hands of the president's "elite team of agents", as Castle wrapped an arm around his daughter's shoulders and escorted her along for a "family" dinner and movie night with Melanie Carmichael that she decided enough was enough.

Kate took a swig of her beer, jammed a finger into the mute button and forced her eyes off the picture of a silent, smiling president, girlfriend and sullen pre-teen. Anger gnawed at her gut as she read the crawl line talking about polling numbers and debates on family values. She could still feel Alexis staring miserably at her from the screen. With a second swig of beer, she turned the TV off all together.


"I need to talk to you."

Castle glanced up to see an irate Kate Beckett standing in the doorway to his office, Becky fuming quietly behind her.

"This isn't a good time, Beckett," Castle responded with a sigh. He was due to give the State of the Union Address in less than an hour and his staff was still squabbling about wording and scrambling with rewrites. The last thing he needed was his suddenly complicated personal life adding to the mix.

"Well make it a good time."

Castle froze, eyes rising from the piles of papers on his desk. "Becky, could you give us a moment please?"

They both stood silent, Beckett's head cocked slightly to watch over her shoulder as Becky turned to exit with a set jaw. He had been getting that look a lot from his assistant lately. Even from someone so small it sent a shiver down his spine.

"She really doesn't like it when people brush by her." Castle started, the feeble attempt at a joke falling flat as Beckett continued to stare him down. "Look Beckett, this isn't the time or the place for this. I know what this is about and we do need to talk but right now I really need to -"

"Have you talked to your daughter lately?"

"Wha- what?" Castle stuttered.

"Have you talked to Alexis about Melanie Carmichael?" Beckett elaborated, her words falling slowly from her lips.

"Yeah." Castle shrugged, completely thrown. "She said she's fine with it."

"Right. Because she's actually fine with it, or because she has to be fine with it?"

"What are you insinuating, Agent?"

Castle could feel his frustration swirling up from his gut, curling in tendrils around his lungs, tickling at his throat. This maddening woman. She had all but ignored him for the past two and a half weeks since Christmas, and now instead of talking about what they should be talking about, she was storming into his office, acting like she knew his daughter better than he did?

"I'm not insinuating anything. I am saying that Alexis is miserable about this whole situation, but you would know that if you had actually spent any time with her in the past month."

"How dare you…" Castle fumed, stalking around his desk to the middle of the room. "You have no right to tell me how to raise my kid. She knows I'm always here for her. She would tell me if something were wrong."

"Really? Well then I guess you know that Gina Griffin went to your kid behind your back and told her that she had to like Melanie and play nice for the cameras or else."

Castle's next words halted on his lips. "She what?"

Beckett's lips tilted up in a sad smile. Her voice was softer when she spoke again. "She's upset, she's hurt and she feels intimidated. You need to talk to her. Really talk to her."

Castle sank down onto the edge of his desk. His hand ran through his hair, the anger seeping from him. "I know I haven't been around as much as I should have been this month, but I figured Alexis was okay. We talked about it before I decided to run. We talked about how much I might be gone, about how busy I would be and she seemed to understand, to be okay with it."

"She's a kid, Castle," Beckett responded, her voice low now, sympathetic. "She probably didn't completely understand."

"I know. I know, but she's been fine so far, and now that she has you, I…"

"What?"

"You heard her the other day. She loves you. She looks up to you. Hell, you've been here for more in the last six months than her mother has in the last six years."

"Castle, it's my job to look out for her."

"Right, so that's why you spent New Years here with her? That's why you were hanging around every night this past week while I was in Europe - don't think I didn't hear - because it's your job?"

Kate turned her back to him on a sigh, pacing the few steps to the door, one hand running through her hair. "Just talk to her, okay? She doesn't need a friend right now, she doesn't need the president, she needs her dad."

"I'll talk to her."

"Good. I, uh, I should go."

"Kate." Castle was across the room in four long strides, his fingers catching the meat of her palm in a loose hold. "I need to talk to you too."

She turned back to him with a sad smile. "I don't think there's much to talk about."

"Please just let me explain."

"There's nothing to explain, Mr. President. I understand. Now if you'll excuse me."

Her hand slipped from his hold and Castle swallowed hard. He knew that tone. She was shutting down, and if he let her go now…

"We're not dating."

His words stopped her in her tracks, her fingers gripping the doorknob.

"Melanie and I..." He started again, sending silent prayers heavenward that she would actually stay to hear him out. "Gina and Paula came to me a couple days after Christmas, said polling numbers showed that the public wanted me to date. At first I thought this was great, that I could actually... But then the next thing I know I'm ditching my daughter and you to smile for the cameras with a woman I barely even know hanging on my arm and I - I am so sorry I didn't tell you before now. I know you're hurt and angry and I've messed up with both you and Alexis but I just wanted to explain and..."

She was facing him now, wary eyes softer.

"I wasn't lying - what I told you at Camp David. I just don't know how to do this," he finished with shoulders slumped. For the first time since he had walked in on Meredith in their bed with another man, he felt completely defeated.

"I-," she started, only for the door to burst open behind her, members of his staff not giving the agent a second glance as they flooded the room around them.

"Mr. President, we have to go."

"Right," Castle replied glancing at the clock. 8:55. Davis Monroe shoved a stack of pages in his hands rattling off key points that had been edited in the speech. He spotted Beckett against the far wall as he was being ushered out the door. "Wait for me."


"...This is why I am proud to call myself the President of these United States. Thank you and God Bless the United States of America."

Castle smiled as he exited through the sea of flashing lights, the room around him a deafening cacophony of applause and shouted questions. If someone asked him right now what he had just said over the course of the past hour, he would have been at a loss. All he could think about was Kate, getting back to her, explaining and making everything right again.

"Great job, Mr. President." Becky beamed at him as he turned the corner back toward his office.

"Thanks, Becky," He replied automatically.

"Mr. President, I need to talk to you about..."

Castle stopped to turn to look at the man pacing him. "Davis, it's after ten PM, I'm sure whatever it is can wait until tomorrow morning."

"Yes, sir."

Castle nodded his head as everyone else hung back, not daring to follow him into his office. When he was satisfied they had all received the message, he flung the door open, hurrying inside.

"I'm sorry that took so long," he started, only to find himself talking to an empty room.

Kate Beckett was gone.


"Hey," Castle greeted with a tired smile as he knocked on the cracked door of his daughter's bedroom. He may have irreparably ruined one relationship tonight, but this one he could definitely save. "What are you still doing awake?"

"I wanted to see your speech," Alexis replied, carefully putting a marker in her novel before closing it on her lap.

"So, how did I do?"

"Very presidential, but one or two jokes wouldn't have hurt," Alexis informed him seriously, and Castle couldn't help but chuckle.

"I'll let Carmen know for next time."

Alexis gave a satisfied nod and Castle sank down onto the edge of her bed.

"I want to talk to you."

"About what?" Alexis turned to slip her book onto the corner of her white nightstand in a show of giving him her full attention.

"It's about Melanie."

"Oh."

Castle's heart sank in his chest at Alexis' downtrodden look. He wanted to kick himself. Kate had been right. He hadn't been paying attention.

"I know this is new for you and a little weird, my dating. I just wanted to make sure you're okay with it. I don't care what anyone else tells you, I'm your dad and you and I get the last say. If you don't like Melanie, I want you to tell me. If anyone tells you to do something you are uncomfortable with, come tell me. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. I know I haven't been around a lot lately, but I'm always here for you, no matter what. You come first, Alexis."

"Okay," the girl responded with a small nod, scooching forward in the bed to sit nestled into his side. "I'm okay with you dating, Dad and Melanie is nice, I just..."

"You just what?" Castle prompted, wrapping his arm around her to squeeze her into his side.

"I don't know..." She responded, her teeth worrying her lip in a move that made him smile. She had been picking up Beckett's habits. "Why her?"

"That's complicated," Castle started.

"Are you going to marry her?"

"I. No. I don't think so," He stumbled in response. Castle ran his free hand down his face. "Look, Alexis. Melanie is a nice person, and I am just enjoying spending time with another adult where I don't have to be the President."

"But you hang out with other adults too. You talk to Agent Beckett all the time."

Castle's heart clenched again at the mention of Kate's name. "Yeah, I do."

"So why do you have to date Melanie, why can't you just... hang out with Agent Beckett?"

"It's-"

"Complicated?"

Castle huffed out a laugh. "Yeah, pumpkin, it's complicated."

Alexis' body sagged harder against him. "Okay. If she makes you happy you have my blessing."

"Okay, but still, you come to me if something is wrong."

"I will, Dad. I promise."

"That's my girl. Now time for bed, I don't want to hear that you were falling asleep in first period algebra again."

"I've never fall asleep in algebra," Alexis parried back as she slipped under the covers. "That was you."

"Oh, right. My mistake."

"Goodnight, Father." Alexis stated, her face half buried in her pillow, voice already heavy with sleep.

Castle clicked the light off and took a moment to watch his daughter from the doorway, the room cast in shadows, the only light filtering in from the hall. "Goodnight, Daughter. I love you."

Castle trudged down the hall, his fingers tugging at the knot of his tie. His body ached with exhaustion. He wasn't naive. He had known going in that being president would be hard. He had known that it would mean making sacrifices and hard decisions, but he hadn't expected to come up against problems like this. It was like a slow motion train wreck that kept playing in his mind from the moment Kate Beckett walked into his life up to her look of utter devastation as he walked out the door of the Oval Office.

If they had met a year earlier, when he was just a presidential hopeful, if she had gone into law instead of the secret service. If he hadn't of hired her and asked her out instead. If he had just stood up to Gina and Paula and put his foot down, polling numbers be damned.

Castle sighed, maybe there was still hope. Maybe he could make this right. He could show up at her door, bring her flowers. He would grovel and pester her into forgiving him. They'd figure out her career, she wouldn't be able to guard Alexis anymore but she could be put on another detail. She could go back to the FBI if she wanted. Of course if she became First Lady even that would be off the table.

He paused outside his room and slumped against the wall. Was it normal to consider giving up the presidency for a girl? Unfortunately, that wasn't even a question that could be answered at the former president poker game. Castle's hand scratched through his hair and down to rub against the shadow of stubble beginning to pepper his jaw. He needed to sleep, or at least to try. Morning would come too soon, bringing with it its own problems.

With one last tug on his tie, he turned the knob to his room only to freeze with his fingers paused over the already activated light switch. There, on his bed, propped against the headboard with a book open on her lap sat Kate Beckett.


A/N: Thank you, as always, for the love and support for this story. Your words and flails never fail to bring a smile to my face. And, as always, thank you to Kate Christie for being an unfailing source of support and flamingo edits.

Until next chapter. :)

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