AN: So I'm sorry this has taken longer than necessary to get posted. My great grandfather passed away a few days ago and I've been super busy so getting this posted has been near impossible! But this is an amazing chapter, written by Jen! OH HOLY LEMON! Yesh, there is a lemon, so I hope you dig it!
Thanks so much for the great work Jen! You Rock!
©NataliaNicolette - Although I own nothing you may or may not recognize. No copyright infringement intended.
"When the evening shadows and the stars appearAnd there is no one there to dry your tearsI could hold you for a million yearsTo make you feel my love
I know you haven't made your mind up yetBut I would never do you wrongI've known it from the moment that we metNo doubt in my mind where you belong
I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blueI'd go crawling down the avenueThere's nothing that I wouldn't doTo make you feel my love."
To Make You Feel My Love Bob Dylan
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Pierce Mactal
--
I had never been a cautious girl. Perhaps that came from having been raised by such brave women, I never felt afraid to do anything. Things changed with Logan, I became a shell of who I was, never thinking I was worth much more than a life of fear and insecurity.
But now, in Spear's arms, I knew right where I belonged.
It had been a day of life, a day that could make anyone fall asleep with a smile on their face. It was different for me, though. Things were…perfect. I had truly felt like part of a family, something I hadn't felt since before Mom died. That was another thing that made today so special. My mom…I hadn't talked about her in years, hadn't wanted to remember anything about that day, but with Spear, I felt safe, I felt like I could share anything with him, even this…this action that I knew would be so…different.
I was seventeen when I lost my virginity. It wasn't special, it wasn't unique, and it wasn't something I ever wanted to share with anyone, except my daughter, someday, to tell her how it shouldn't be done, the backseat of a car never a comfortable place to feel like your last piece of innocence disappears. And not like Logan was gentle or caring when it happened. So, in a way, this time, this moment, was like a first time for me.
One minute, Spear was telling me how much his grandfather loved and adored his grandmother and the next, my lips were on his and I never wanted them to leave. Spear didn't seem to mind too much, holding me up, laying me on the couch, allowing me to touch every single inch of his chest and stomach. My mouth wanted to scream that I loved him. Tell him he was the only thing I ever wanted, ever. Then he picked me up from the couch, carrying me to his bed, something that should've scared the shit out of me. But I didn't. I felt more sure of this than I had of anything other than Spear in years.
And when I felt like everything was how it should've been, and I wanted him. Then, like a fucking knife to my heart, he pulled away and sat on his knees. What the hell? I thought. He could only look at me. "What's the matter?" I asked, my voice trying to hide some of the pain in my voice, though I didn't think it was working. "Did I do something wrong?"
It was quiet, more quiet than it had been between us in a long time, and I felt my heartbreaking. He didn't want me. Not like that. I was damaged goods, and I felt my eyes start to glaze over with tears. Spear distanced himself farther from me. "You didn't do anything wrong," he said. I didn't believe him. I had to have done something, but what?
"I don't get—" I started but he cut me off.
"It's not anything you've done. I just don't want to rush things. You've just gone through all that shit with Logan and I don't' want to—" Really? Did he think I couldn't do this with him because of Logan? If anything it was the complete opposite.
"What I had with Logan and what I have you are two very different things, Spear," I told him, trying to make him believe me. I crawled to him, stopping to put my arms around his neck. "I want this. I want you." I pulled back to pull off my shirt, as he watched me.
His hands found my waist and my body relaxed, giving into his warmth as I exhaled.
I closed the space between us, kissing his lips until he bit down softly and I sighed. I wanted more. He slipped his arms under mine and laid me down pushing us back to the pillows. He kissed me, harder, but it still wasn't enough, and I ran my hands down my bare stomach to the button on my jeans, as he pulled away from me.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
I nodded to him, moving his hands to my hips. "I'm sure about you and me and that's enough," I whispered, meaning every letter, every syllable. He kissed me harder, taking my hands away and lightly tickling my stomach as he unbuttoned my jeans, then slowly slid the zipper down.
I spread my legs to let him settle between them while he pressed his hands on either side of my head. His lower half wasn't going anywhere and he was pressing into me. I released the grip on his shoulders and ran my hands to his stomach, finding the button to his jeans, and then unzipping them, feeling the pressure increase between my legs.
Spear pulled away and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. He moved one of his hands to my waistband. "Can I take them off?" he asked, and I felt a warm pool between my legs. This was happening…
"Yes," I breathed, kissing him lightly on the lips. I lifted my hips and to allow him easier access to remove my jeans. He stopped at my ankles, a grin on his face as he looked up at me. For once in about a billion years, I was actually wearing matching undergarments, he pulled my jeans off the rest of the way. He was still completely dressed and I pulled his shirt off, kissing his chest, then looking up at him while I grabbed his waistband. "Do you want me to help you take yours off?" I blushed a little asking him.
"Yeah," his voice was so soft and low and sensual and he moved over, standing up next to the bed. He leaned down and kissed me once on the lips, before I pushed his jeans off, leaving him in his boxers, me in my panties and bra.
I laid back, propped up on my elbows. "Spear…" I said, wiggling my finger to him.
"You're so beautiful," he moved back to the bed, sitting up on his knees.
I pulled him down, laying him on his back and then straddling him. I looked down at Spear…my Spear…I ran my finger down his chest, watching the muscles jump, stopping at his belly button. It was the nicest belly button I'd ever seen, I referred to it as a "kinda outie" because it wasn't completely an outie like me, it was only kind of that way. "You are…" There were no words for how amazing he was, so I let my actions speak for themselves, leaning down to kiss his lips, then his neck, his collarbone, then his chest. "You have the sexiest bellybutton," I whispered, leaning down to kiss it. "Can I keep going?" I asked, almost embarrassed that I'd gotten so bold.
Spear pulled me down and kissed me. He ran his hands up my side to my back. "Can I take this off first?" he stopped at the clasp on my bra. I nodded, touching my tongue to his, the passion getting really intense and my head spinning a little. He expertly undid it with a single snap of his wrist.
"You're awfully good at that," I blushed again, letting the hot pink bra straps fall, kissing my wolf's mouth, moist and warm. Spears large fingers pulled it off the rest of the way.
I sat up, covering myself with my arm. "Hey, that's not gonna work," Spear smirked. I nodded and moved my arm, exposing my breast to him.
"Sorry…" I whispered.
Spear furrowed his brow. "Honey, you don't have anything to be sorry for. I just…I only wanted to see if you wanted to show me."
"I do. I, uh, you're only the second person to see me like this, and…before, I didn't, he didn't…I just know it's not all that much to look at," my voice was barely emitting any sound and every insecurity I had crept to the surface.
"Pierce, can I touch you?" Spear's voice was more confident.
I managed to breathe out a "Yes," Spear's hands finding my breasts.
"They fit perfectly," he smirked. "They're perfect, you're perfect." I knew I was blushing more and I leaned into his touch on my breast, running my hands down his chest again, and rocking forward. "Can you feel what you do to me?" He grabbed my hips and pushed me into him slightly and I shuddered at the hardness underneath me.
I got bold again. "Will you be on top?" I had barely said it before Spear flipped us, keeping his weight off me, kissing my neck and sucking all the way down to my nipple, where his tongue swirled.
"Mahal ng Diyos!" I groaned out, arching my back and pushing harder into him.
Spear stopped, his eyes heavy with lust. "I don't know what you said, but it's just about the sexiest fucking thing I've ever heard."
I parted my legs more. "I said, Dear God, but keep going and I bet I can say more than that."
Spears growled, his hands tugging at my panties, pulling them off before I realized they were missing. His hand held at my abdomen, looking in my eyes, and inching, inching, inching down to the most intimate part of my body and I gasp at the sensation of him only resting his hand there.
Now that I knew this was happening, really happening, I panicked for a minute. "Spear, is Shane, is he, coming home?"
He smirked and then chuckled. "Nope, it's just you and me, babe." He kept his weight off me, kissing my roughly, then pulling away. "Um, I don't have…I think Shane might have a condom, I…"
I ran my fingers through his hair. "It's okay. I'm, um, I'm on the Pill," I told him, stroking his cheek.
"Okay," Spear said, seeming like he needed that reassurance. I was already completely naked and I knew he was straining against his boxers, I could feel it brush my thigh or press into my core. "I think this is my new favorite part of you," he whispered, his fingertips lightly touching each of my breasts, making me shiver and my breaths come out more like pants.
A moment of courage hit me and I drove my hand down to his waist, pushing his boxers down. "Ugh!" he groaned as my hand grazed over him.
"I'm sorry," I breathed.
"No, don't be. It…it felt good," Spear panted.
That was all the motivation I needed. My hand slid down his back, around his side, over his hip, until I was groping him. I'd never touched anyone man like I was touching Spear right now, not Logan. Logan was more of a "quick fuck" kinda guy, no ecstasy to it. I knew, by the love I felt for Spear, and the love he felt for me, there'd be more than enough euphoria for each of us. I kept hold of him, shifting him in my hand, moving faster. I couldn't see, but I could feel, Spear's enormous size didn't just dominate his upper body, he was big everywhere, EVERYWHERE.
"Spear," I kissed him, spreading my legs even farther, him settling in a little more, groaning as I started to stroke him.
He holding back now, and he kissed my forehead, cheeks, and chin, still keeping his weight off me. Spear ran his nose over jawline. Then moved his hand down to my waist and he pulled me up just a bit.
"Spear, I need you," I whispered. "I need to feel you." I ran my hands down his back, pulling him down on me. "Now, please…" I was being rude and impatient, but I wanted, need him, I needed to be his.
"Are you gonna be okay?" he asked.
"I'll be alright," I whispered into his ear, kissing his neck right below it.
Spear's lips returned to mine, increasing in intensity, both of us making sounds and moaning like there was no one else in the world to hear us. His kisses didn't stop when I felt him situate himself, right where he needed to be and I gripped his shoulders again, hitching one of my legs over his hip.
"I want you," Spear whispered, starting to push into me slightly.
"Then take me," I whispered back, sparking something in him, his kiss feverish, sliding into me as I gasp. This was definitely not like anything I'd ever felt before.
He didn't move but looked down at me. "You okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?" His eyes were so full of worry, not that he was worried he was making a mistake. He was worried about me, his thoughts weren't of himself or what he needed, he wanted me…
I nodded, hoping he could feel my love for him as my eyes locked with his. "Just give me a second to adjust to the, um, size," I blushed, wiggling my hips, feeling myself stretch. Then, as I moved my leg back up over his hip, I felt it, something I hadn't gotten from sex in a long time, pleasure. "Move…" I commanded, feeling like a drill sergeant.
It didn't take more than that, Spear pulling out and then pushing back in. "Ugh…" he groaned and I climbed up his chest a little, turning my neck to the side, as he started to suck on it. "You don't…this feels…you're so…" His fragmented sentences made me smile, knowing I was the one doing that to him, keeping him that overwhelmed that he couldn't even form a sentence.
"Keep going," I moaned back, trailing my fingers down his back as he continued pushing in and out. My stomach started to tighten, my muscles tensing as he set a steady rhythm of in and out. I hitched my other leg up around his hips too, now allowing him a different angle. "Oh, God!" I panted. I wanted to be closer, if that were possible, I needed him to pull me closer to him. "Hold me tighter," I whimpered.
"I got ya, sweetheart. I'm not letting you go," he kissed my collarbone. "Ever." He hooked his arms under mine, making his thrust less dramatic but slower and more sensual, moving his lips back to my mouth.
I pushed my tongue forward, and he met it with his and a very soft, stiff thrust. "Ohhhh," I moaned. "There…right there." I didn't even mean to say it, it just kinda came out but it was worth it. Spear repeated his action, once, twice, three times, before I felt it coming.
"I'm gonna…" Spear's thrusts became erratic, and I felt the bed moving with him. He moved one of his arms from around me and fisted the pillow that my head was on. "Fuck!" he screamed and I felt him release. I didn't mind that I didn't get that release. I had felt more pleasure in that closeness to Spear than in every single bit of sex I'd had before. But when he opened his eyes, he looked horrified. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's just been awhile and I guess my body just…I'm the world's worst imprint, Pierce, I…you didn't get to, you know, finish."
I leaned up and kissed him sweetly. "It's okay," I ran my hand over his forehead, wiping off a few beads of sweat, feeling his heat more now that we were just laying here. "Kayo ay kahanga-hangang," I whispered on his lips and immediately felt him stiffen inside me.
"Let's see if I can't get you taken care of," he grinned, kissing me hard again. "What'd you say, by the way? In Tagalog?"
I bit his bottom lip. "You're amazing," I pulled my leg up more, and there was that feeling again, that amazing feeling, that took my breath away. But now, I managed to talk. "You are the best imprint anyone could ask for, and you make me feel so, ohhh…ohhhh!" It was building, his thrust back to the steady rhythm as my whole body tensed more, made more so as he opened his eyes, those swimming grey eyes and I lost myself in that moment, my body shuddering.
Like magic, I felt it all go, everything, all the qualms and fears I had about anything. I felt loved, I felt whole, and I felt Spear letting everything go too, our breathing staggered.
"You're amazing." his soft grey eyes never leaving mine, and I felt his grip ease on the pillow behind me. My body felt like every bone had disappeared, as he swept my hair from my brow and leaned down to kiss it. I had no idea this was what an orgasm was supposed to feel like and do to you, my toes curled and not moving.
"That was the single most satisfying experience of my life," I panted, as he slip out of me and rolled over. I missed his warmth and whimpered a bit at the loss of contact. Spear pulled me into his side, holding me with his arm wrapped around me, his fingertips dancing on my hip and backside. I yawned, closing my eyes.
"I couldn't of said it better myself. Are you tired?" Spear kissed me with soft lips.
"Hmmm…" I hitched my leg across his stomach, feeling myself drift, worn out from that one act of love. I felt my breathing change, relaxing next to him. Until Spear pulled me out of my slumber.
He inhaled, nuzzling me, putting his chin on my head. "I love you, Pierce," he whispered, so faintly that I knew he didn't intend me to hear, thinking I was asleep. But I looked up, kissing his jaw line, feeling like I could fly, but wanting to stay right where I was.
"I love you too." I said back, no quiet tone, I was confident. I loved him, and I was ready for him to know that. "Mahal kita."
Spear looked shocked, like he hadn't expected me to hear, let alone respond, "Mahal kita too," he placed another kiss on my lips, this time more passionate, his tongue snaking into my mouth. His hand gripping onto my backside and rolling me on his stomach. I could feel him under me, growing, but he didn't try anything else. He knew I was exhausted and I knew that he loved me. I closed my eyes again, this time really falling asleep.
I woke up, completely naked, still on top of Spear, the sheets down at the end of the bed, my whole backside exposed. The sun was peaking through the curtains and I was so comfy, until nature called and I had to use the bathroom. I slid out of Spear's strong hold, rubbing over him. My feet stumbled a little as they hit the floor. I looked around for my clothes, picking up my panties, that were ripped in half. I slid on Spear's big t-shirt, then finding Spear's boxers and put them on. The clothing hung off me, but I could smell Spear all over it. I turned to look at him, fully exposed in front of me, and I tiptoed to kiss his forehead, covering him up with the sheet.
The door creaked a little as I slipped out, and I yawned opening the door I assumed was the bathroom, relieving myself, swishing some mouthwash and trying to make my hair not stick up. I inhaled and exhaled, glancing in the mirror, deciding I would make breakfast for Spear and I.
I kept my head down walking to the kitchen, thinking about the night before, how much I loved Spear. I opened the refrigerator, looking over the supplies, pulling out the dozen eggs, putting them on the counter then leaning down to get out the ham and cheese.
"Uhm," someone cleared their voice, and I assumed it was Spear.
"Good morning," I smiled, turning around to see Shane sitting at the table.
"Morning," he smirked. This was not happening. He wasn't supposed to be here.
"Um, I thought you had plans and you were supposed to not be here," I panicked.
"Good to see you too. My plans changed and I decided to come back here," he blushed. HE BLUSHED! Dear God, he'd heard us, he was here for the whole thing.
"Um," I had no idea what to say or do.
"What are you doing here?" Spear said behind me, clad in a pair of fresh boxers. My eyes were wide as he pulled me behind him.
"Things changed, sorry," Shane groaned.
There was a knock on the door and Shane got up to answer it. Spear turned to me. "I'll be right back," he pecked my lips and ran to his room coming back a few seconds later with sweats and a t-shirt on, just in time to watch Shane come back in with Kai and Ayden.
"Good morning," Kai smirked, as Ayden shook his head with a laugh. "So, I see that someone is really, really a wolf-girl now, eh?"
I wanted to climb under a rock, feeling suddenly smaller in Spear's clothes. "I'm gonna go call Lola real quick," I told Spear, bolting for the bedroom and throwing on the clothes I had that hadn't suffered the night before. I called Lola, explaining that the baby was born late and I decided to stay in La Push. Lola seemed to believe me and I felt relieved notifying Lola where I was.
"Hey, you okay?" Spear slipped in the room, joining me on the bed, where I sat Indian style.
I nodded. "I'm just embarrassed. Shane probably heard us, and now there's all these people."
Spear put his arms around me. "I know, but it doesn't change anything. Last night was like perfect and I love you, no matter what. And besides, Kai and Ayden did much, much worse. Their pelvises were glued together for months straight after they were married."
I laughed and leaned forward asI kissed him gently then pulled away. "I love you too."
"See, doesn't that just sound right?" Spear grinned and then stood, helping me off the bed.
The sounds from the kitchen got louder, more voices joined in. "Hellooo, pretty Pierce! Did you know I'm an uncle now?" Chevy asked.
"Congrats." I chuckled at him.
"It's pretty cool. I can tell she already looks up to me," Chevy took a bite of the omelet that Kai made. He leaned towards me. "I'm pretty sure I'm her favorite Uncle. Just don't tell Kane."
"Don't tell me what?" Kane Ateara stood just outside the kitchen. He took a small sniff and then shook his head with a wry grin, patting Spear on the back. I had no clue what that was suppose to mean.
I turned, planning on grabbing juice out of the fridge but running into a wall of person. "Easy, Killer," the wall said, and I looked up at Jacob Black, grinning. He inhaled and like Kane smiled with a shake of his head. "Seems like someone had a good night last night."
"Alright, we're going elsewhere," Spear grabbed my hand and my purse, pulling me out the door and driving me home.
Last night was great, this morning - not so much. But I guess it didn't matter because I had my wolf and he loved me.
That's all I needed.
AN: Alrighty then! Whoop, whoop! Hope you enjoyed it! Holla!
