"Daria?" I said. I was completely surprised to see her here.

"What...what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Just taking in the view." She commented in her normal Daria monotone. I chuckled inwardly. I had briefly forgotten I was wearing nothing but my boots and my boxers.

"Well, if it's something fantastic you'd like to see, perhaps you can come into my tent." I flirted while tugging on the elastic waistband of my boxers.

"I might even still have that condom in my wallet." I teased. I rarely flirted with Daria; it always seemed to make her uncomfortable. But we weren't dating now, and I was far too relaxed.

"That would have expired by now." Daria delivered flatly.

"Then I don't have to bother looking for it."

"Tom..." Daria dismissed, indicating she was done with the joke.

"Relax, Daria." I had gotten my laugh in. It was time to get serious. I didn't come out here to sleep with her, and I didn't want to anyway.

"You're probably wondering how I found you."

"There's only one way you could have gotten it." I replied. "The real questions are how did Quinn give it away and how much did you bribe her to spill it?"

"I overheard the first one as I passed by Quinn's door. As for the second, well, if you use the right words and you know what you want, you can get Quinn to blab her secrets."

"I can't help but wonder if that's a compliment or an insult." I teased. Daria said nothing.

"So anyway, back to my question. Why are you here?"

"I came to see you." A straightforward answer, for once.

"That's pretty unusual. Unusual still to come here. Wouldn't Quinn have told you I'd be back in a week?" I posed. Quinn did know the length of my plans, it didn't make much sense that Daria would exert this much effort just to see me. I did take pains to stay hidden, and Daria would have had to search to find the campsite.

"Tom." Daria pleaded. "I wanted to see how you were right now."

"Daria, you're acting strangely. I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" I tried to play dumb, but I knew what was coming next.

"Jane mentioned what happened to Elsie."

"Damn." I noted. "Well, let me get dressed." I rummaged around in my tent for some pants and a T-shirt. I brought out a cooler so Daria could sit, while I'll took a seat on a stump. This was going to be a long conversation.


"There's really no need for concern, Daria. Elsie's fine."

"Don't pretend like this doesn't bother you." Daria stated. An accusation, especially about denial, always sounded harsher coming from Daria.

"If we're playing the denial game, then why don't you tell me why you're here. You didn't come here to talk to me about Elsie." I posed. Daria spoke to Elsie even less then I spoke to Quinn during our time together. At my insistence, of course. Elsie had been screwing up her life when Daria came in to mine, and there was no way I'd let Elsie potentially mess her up. Although Daria may indeed have been concerned for me about Elsie, she would not have made the trek here just for that.

"Daria?" I probed. She was silent for a long time.

"I've been thinking all summer. About us, about everything." Daria finally spoke. "It's all I've been thinking about. I couldn't even concentrate on college."

"And what is it that bothers you?" I asked for clarification. Daria halted, as if she didn't know what to say. A rare instance, to be sure.

"Tom, ever since I met you, I realized just how awful I can be to people who care about me, even when I think I'm just being me." Daria had told me something like this before, about her parents.

"Hey, you had no reason to like me then." Something I had told her before. I had no interest in digging that up again.

"I meant Jane. When we first met, and when we kissed, I realized just how much I could hurt the people I cared about."

"We all do that. And Jane forgave us. I think. I mean, she hasn't come over punching me in the chest again." I kept my lighthearted facade up. "But I think you're getting off-track. Come on, Daria, tell me. What is it you needed to talk about?" Daria seemed almost relieved that I had called her on that.

"Tom, when we broke up, it hurt." She stated an obvious fact, something I knew well. Many things were going through my mind for responses.

"I know." Was the only thing I managed to get out.

"I told myself it was for the best. I still think it is." Daria stated. "I said we'd both move on, but months have passed and I'm still hurting. And I don't know if this is just normal for relationships or if there's something wrong with me."

I paused, unsure of what to take from her words. Was this the revenge I wanted? Did I want her to pine for me? I looked up at Daria's face for the first time since we started talking, and I looked into her eyes. There was such sadness, such devastation, it was like the world was holding her by the throat.

"I never realized how much this hurt you." I remarked. I remembered where I had seen her look that way before: at the Pizza Palace when we broke up. I dismissed it from my memory when I saw it then. I couldn't consider how she felt then, I wouldn't consider it. And the realization of it caused the same despair to infect me.

"I didn't want you to. I know you Tom. You always take the blame, even when you shouldn't. You did it all the time in our relationship."

"I did that because I screwed up." I remarked. It was true, I had no shortage of insensitive comments, stupid remarks, and just out-and-out confusion about the minds of women. As much as I had dated, perhaps I thought I knew better then I did.

"No, Tom. You didn't screw up. We both screwed up. And I had a hard time admitting that to myself. I wanted to blame you for everything. It was easier then blaming myself." I said nothing.

"You were right about Bromwell. I wanted to get in and I didn't." Daria vocalized my own thoughts on the matter. But hearing her admit it didn't make me feel better about accusing her of it.

"You are still smart enough. Daria, you're brilliant." I praised.

"I'm not as great as you think, Tom. Sure, I'm smart, but I'm not the smartest person here." Daria put herself down. My knee-jerk reaction was to protest, but I held my tongue.

"I had no extracurricular activities, and to top it off, my interview was botched. You didn't have those problems, at least not to my extent." Daria noted. "Just because I failed was no reason to mean that you should have as well."

"I still think you deserved to get in." I noted. I always had believed that.

"Tom, I know I've told you this, but you deserve to get into Bromwell." She had told me this before. She said it at Pizza Palace just before we broke up. Back then, it sounded like a kiss-off, something she didn't believe. Now, it sounded sincere.

"What about the wing and the legacy and all that other crap you said got me in?" I might as well have asked.

"What about your perfect math SAT's, your charming interview, and your outstanding grades?" Daria asked. I nearly stopped dead in my tracks.

"And I didn't ask myself this question why?" I thought. Even though I knew about these things, I didn't even consider them.

"You're still bothered by that, aren't you?" Daria asked, noticing my hesitation.

"It's been on my mind all summer." I admitted. "I couldn't shake it. It's caused me no end of problems." Even Daria could not shake her own accusation from me. Was it merely because I languished on it the whole summer?


I started to speak, but Daria spoke up first.

"Tom, before I met you, I could handle high school. I could deal with class, with the stupid students, the egotistical teachers, and all of that. I had a good friend in Jane and a few other close acquaintances and that's all I needed. Then you came along, and I realized just how much I could hurt other people."

"You were nervous, you didn't know what to do." I defended her.

"I'm not done." Daria continued. "Then we started dating and I realized something else. I realized that I could have more. And after that was gone, it hurt so much I was scared to talk to you, scared that I'd run back to you, do anything to stop this painful feeling. And when I saw you moving on with your life, it was almost too much to take." It was a lot to take in. A little flattering, to be sure.

"Daria, that's not how it was with me." Daria looked at me. She deserved to know the truth.

"When we broke up, I went practically insane. I tried to move on, but nothing excited me anymore. Everything became such a chore, and it wasn't like I was getting any peace, what with Bromwell and my family and all. And then Elsie overdosed, and I realized something." I paused, and looked at Daria. She said nothing.

"When Elsie overdosed, everything was so automatic, I could barely even care. And it wasn't just because it was Elsie and her stupid moves."

"You were in shock. You didn't know how to feel." Daria replied. "At least you didn't panic."

"No, Daria, I realized I wasn't moving on, I was stuck. Daily life had become a burden. I couldn't bring myself to feel anything." I admitted to Daria what I had admitted to Jane. Like Jane, Daria paused and said nothing. But unlike Jane, Daria spoke a moment later.

"I never realized I hurt you that much." Daria sounded downcast again.

"How could you? All I did was pick fights."

"We really screwed each other up, didn't we?" Daria asked a rhetorical question, but I answered anyway.

"Yeah. But that means we care about each other. Isn't it the same way with your parents?" Daria smiled. From all the rescuing I pulled from Helen Morgandorffer, and the lovable eccentrics of Jake Morgandorffer, I knew that driving each other nuts was tradition for Daria's family.


As Daria and I spoke to each other, I felt the entire scenery fade away. There was only me and her. I could feel connected to Daria again, could feel just how hard she tried to get over the relationship, but couldn't. I could feel just how much she cared about me, even with her stoic attitude. I felt moved, I wanted to help, what I couldn't feel with Elsie. I knew that, even with this closeness Daria and I were sharing, we would not get back together in a relationship. . I had no desire to fight with her again. Our relationship didn't end because I was a failure, and it wasn't because she was a failure. It was my relationship with Jane all over again: we were just two different people. That was all, nothing complicated. But I could start feeling genuinely good about Daria again, and know that she didn't hate me; she didn't want me to suffer. She wanted me to have peace, and to get over her.

We sat in silence for a moment longer.

"You moved me." I told her. Daria didn't answer.

"I looked up to you. You did whatever you want, and had no pretense. It was easy to like you, It was easy to admire you."

"Thanks." Daria replied. "It was weird when you told me that the first time, but it felt really good. Tom, you inspired me, too."

"Huh?" I had never heard Daria praise me like this.

"I drifted through high school resenting most everything, rejecting everyone before they could reject me. But not you. You were the only one who refused to reject me. You threw yourself before me and endured my insults just to make things easier for Jane. Every time I got nervous and messed up, you forgave me. Someone could harm you, and you could let it go. That was a lot more then I could ever do." It was a little embarrassing to be spoken of like this, but it felt really good.

"You know something, Daria, I'm glad you came out here. I think I can move on with my life now." I smiled. I don't think I smiled very much this summer. It felt...good.

"I do too." Daria stated, but this time I felt as though she meant it. It was about time we did.

"But moving on doesn't mean cutting ties. We should still be friends." I was hopeful in my statements.

"That does sound good. Is that pizza offer you made still good? Hope you're buying."

"It is, but there's a few things I need to do first." I replied. "I've still got another dragon to slay." Daria looked at me knowingly. Daria may have come to grips with her demons, but I still had one thing she could not help me with. And I think she knew what it was.

"Besides, you think my parents would let me go out looking like this? They'd kill me." I hadn't showered, shaved, combed my hair, or even looked in a mirror for four days. The only cleanliness thing I had done was brush my teeth.

"I'll call you when I'm ready, but expect it to be the day after I get back." I smiled. Daria smiled too, and went off. We weren't ready for hugs just yet; it was too soon.


The last four days of camping felt like the first three, with one major difference. Before Daria, I was relaxed because I wasn't thinking about anything else. But now, I was thinking about other things, but I was still relaxed. I thought about Elsie, and Bromwell. Talking with Daria had broken the malevolent thoughts over my mind. The voice in my head blaming Daria had silenced itself, and my thoughts became hopeful. I knew that I would have to speak with my parents when I got back, but now, I was ready for anything. There was still some lingering doubts in my mind about Bromwell, but now I was ready to explain things fully to them. They would see, or I would make them.

When I got back home, I unpacked and immediately took a shower. There would be no reason for my mother to complain about being presentable. After grabbing some clean clothes and making myself look as they always wanted me, I found them in my dad's office.

"Tom, we were looking for you." Mom mentioned.

"I was just cleaning myself up. Indoor plumbing is a fantastic invention." I teased. Mom chuckled only briefly.

"So, tell me, what's going to happen to Elsie." I posed.

"We'll discuss that later, dear. Tom, your father and I want to talk to you about your attitude as of late." Mom noted.

"Oh." Although my spirits were high, my parents were good at quenching that. They were better then Dracula when it came to that.

"Tom, we've been discussing what you told me about Bromwell." Mom said.

"Maybe I wasn't explaining it as well as I thought." I started, but my father rose up his hand. His principal command for me to be silent.

"Your father and I discussed it, and we...we think we understand why you feel the way you do." Mom got out.

"Huh?" Now I was confused.

"Make no mistake, you should not have spoken to your mother that way." My father started sternly.

"Angier, I will handle this!" My mother sniped. My father quieted down. He could never stand up to my mother.

"Tom, I understand that you're worried you got into Bromwell for reasons other than your own merits." Mom started. She was very calm, not a hint of emotion registered in her eyes.

"Yes." I replied. "I want to go to Bromwell, but I only want to go if I deserved it."

"Tom, do you deserve it?" My father asked.

"I...I don't know."

"Tom, do you deserve it?" My father echoed. I thought about it for a moment.

"Yeah." I replied, but very softly. "I think I do. I did do well on other things."

"Good." My father replied. "Now I can tell you something. Tom, do you honestly think you're going to go through life without being judged?"

"No." I answered his question swiftly. "I don't mind being judged if I screw up, but to be judged..."

"Tom, there are people everywhere who will accuse you of these things. If it's not your ancestry, it's something else. When I was promoted over a co-worker, she told me the only reason I succeeded is because I was a man. I've been told I only succeeded because I was white. I've even been told it's because I'm good-looking."

"Good looking?" I asked.

"Oh, your father was so handsome when he was young." Mom put her arm around Dad in a loving way, something I only saw of them when they were in private.

"But anyway, Tom, you're going to encounter that all your life. The only way to stop that is to succeed." My father finished.

"Tom, you've already been accepted to Bromwell. That's not going to change."My mother started. I heard Trent's voice echo in my head. He had said that too.

"But what you do there is completely up to you. And when you succeed like I know you will, then all this nonsense talk of legacy will disappear." Mom finished. I considered what my parents had said. It made sense.

"Hmmm..." I thought.

"Tom, your father and I know you more then you give us credit for. You only want to be judged on your own merits. It's why you didn't do after-school activities at Fielding, and why you never come to the gallery fund-raisers. You just want to be Tom, not some poster boy child of the Sloanes. And we understand that. That's why we never forced you to any of those affairs. We knew that even if you weren't around, you'd be doing the responsible thing. That was what we both wanted, to have children who could tell right from wrong even when they're not being watched." My mother's insight surprised me. How dense I thought she was, now she was knowing me better then I knew myself.

I didn't know what to say, really. I never imagined my parents would understand how I felt about these things. I almost felt like I was going to cry for joy.

"I'm going to head out. I promised Daria I'd meet her for pizza. But, I'll be back before long. We still have an entire month and Dad, you still have some days off work. There might be something we can all do."

"Daria? I thought you weren't seeing her." Mom asked.

"We're not going out." I replied. "But we're still friends." And I smiled, knowing I could finally believe the words.


"Your parents said that?" Daria asked me at once I saw her at Pizza Palace. I had informed her about my parents genuine insight into my life.

"I wonder how long it will last." I joked. I didn't want her to get all mushy.

"And I assume you told them about that night where you drank 5 martinis in the span of an hour and had to be hauled halfway across town. Unconscious. With your ex and her little sister."

"You're never going to let me live that down, are you?" I asked.

"Well, after 11 am on Moving Day, there might be something else to discuss." Daria teased.

"What?"

"Never mind."

"Hey!" Jane's voice sounded behind us. She took a seat without being invited next to me, Trent, also with her, took a seat next to Daria. I wondered if Daria told them we'd be here. Probably. Not that it mattered.

"So, you two are meeting together and no one is dead." Jane noted.

"Actually, we have killed each other." Daria jabbed.

"Our ghosts are haunting this booth." I eagerly joined in on the fun. "Two spirits eternally locked in a small pizza shop. Buy a pie for our hungry ghosts?"

"I wonder how much ectoplasm costs as a topping?" Never one to miss a joke, Jane joined in.

"Cheap, but it's salty. Like super anchovies." I kept going.

"It'll get pricier when they find a use for making the gastro-intestinal tract glow in the ultraviolet." Daria finished.

"I will never get you three." Trent had a sheepish look on his face, as he normally did whenever our verbal sparring went over his head. But Jane was wearing an extremely confident smile, and I couldn't help but think my meeting with Daria, and indeed, much of this summer's attempts at reconciliation, was an elaborate plot set forth by Jane to help her two best friends get over themselves and stop acting like little bitches.

"Nah." I thought.

"Trent, go get the pizza." Jane ordered.

"Yes'm." Trent slaggered off to follow orders.

"He'll be back before college starts. I think." I noted on his slow pace.

"For Jane, maybe." Daria noted.

"More pizza for me." Jane took it all in stride. "It looks like you two had a fun week."

"Something like that." I told Jane. She'd learn all the details later, from Daria or me, if she didn't already. Trent returned with the pizza, and we all sat down to eat. I couldn't help but feel as though I was missing out on something precious. Here we were, four close friends eating pizza together, and I had missed out on it all summer because I was too busy moaning about things I couldn't change.

"Hey, Tom!" I heard a familiar voice. I turned to the door to see Quinn, flanked by her friends.

"Hey, Quinn." I smiled. "It's only Sunday. Our lesson is tomorrow." I wonder if Quinn noticed that I was admitting publicly that I was her tutor. But she ignored it.

"I know. I just wanted to make sure everything was on schedule and you weren't home, so I figured you guys would be here." I think Quinn wanted to say something more, but wouldn't. After all, her sister was two feet beside me.

"Hey, Quinn, wouldn't this make a great picture!" Quinn's friend Stacy replied.

"Yeah, I think it would. Do you guys mind?" Quinn asked. I looked to the others. Trent shrugged, Daria made no motions, and Jane looked at me as if I had grown a third head.

"Sure, why not." I stated for everyone, or maybe just for myself. Quinn took a seat next to me, and Stacy snapped the shot.

"I'll develop it tonight." Stacy seemed eager. "And Tom, if you ever want to pose like that statue of Apollo picture, just stop by Headshots. I'll be waiting for you."

"Bye!" Quinn bounded off with her friends towards another booth.

"Statue of Apollo?" Daria looked at me quizzically. It looks like she found something new to taunt me on.

"Not a word." I chuckled. "Not. A. Word."