Liara dreamed of the others a lot. Well, more like she had nightmares about them. It was almost always the same thing - the crash repeating over and over in her mind. Her muscles straining with the weight of the barrier she tried to throw around the ship. Actually hearing from twenty yards away Joker's bones snapping in his legs, his screams of pain even as he held onto the Normandy's controls as best he could. The dead silence of the moments after they landed, the smoke burning her throat as she let down the barrier. Burning flesh. Debris scattered everywhere across the CIC where she'd been standing.
She'd been the one to find Chakwas, lying face-down in the remnants of the medbay. There were no cuts that Liara could see, but her head was bent backwards at an obviously wrong angle that nearly made Liara sick. On observing the scene and where Chakwas's body had landed, Liara had reasoned that Chakwas must have been thrown into one of the beds on impact. The only comfort here was that she would have felt no pain, only immediate peace. She at least deserved some peace, after all she'd done for them.
Stepping out of the medbay, she felt a spark of energy run through her, like someone tapping gently at her consciousness. She turned and looked around for the source, and as she walked towards the elevator shaft it grew stronger, more insistent. As she knelt on the floor, the spark was stronger than ever. She scrambled to the emergency shaft in the medbay, averting her eyes from Chakwas's body as much as possible, and scurried down the ladder to the engineering deck. She had to summon up what was left of her biotic strength to pull the doors open, gasping at the sheer effort of it. The insistent little spark nudged her a few more times, before fizzling out like a dying battery. She looked around frantically for any sign of life, having to step over Daniels' and Donnelly's bodies joined together by their outstretched hands. Finally, she heard a soft whisper. Her head whipped around toward the eezo core of the ship, and her heart sighed with relief.
"Kaidan, oh Goddess you're alive," she breathed, running over to him. He was sitting up against the railing in front of the core, his eyes glazed over and unseeing. But he was alive. Liara grabbed for his wrist gently and checked his pulse, alarmed at how fast his heart was beating.
"Can you hear me, Kaidan? Are you all right?" No response. She had to get him out of here, though, that much she knew. Grasping him under his arms, she hauled Kaidan to his feet and helped him to lean against the wall before gently pressing at various body parts with her fingers. Nothing broken, as far as she could tell, but there were still a great number of problems that could be occurring this very moment. He didn't say a word as she wrapped one of his arms around her shoulder and picked up his legs, marveling at how much lighter he was than he appeared. He grumbled a little bit when she hit his shoulder on the door frame, and she quickly apologized. It was incredibly difficult hauling him up the emergency ladder, but she finally did it. She tried to walk in such a way that he wouldn't be able to see the medbay floor, but he didn't appear to be looking at anything but the ceiling anyways. A relief, if a small one.
When they finally reached the CIC again, Liara laid Kaidan down gently on the floor and checked his vitals once more, determining that he would be okay on his own at least for a little while. That's when she heard small cries of pain coming from the cockpit that spurred her into motion once again. Joker.
He was still seated in his pilot's chair, a safety harness the only thing that had kept him from flying out the now-gaping window of the cockpit. His head lifted slightly when he heard her approach, and he let out a whisper. "W-who... who's there?"
"It's me, Joker," she murmured, kneeling down beside his chair. "Tell me where it is the worst."
He grunted, half-laughed, and snarked back, "How about everywhere, Liara. But really, I think all of my ribs are at least fractured. I know my legs are bad."
"We'll get you taken care of, don't worry. Would you like for me to try and lift you up?"
"Umm... yeah," he sighed. "Yeah, you can try." Liara nodded solemnly and reached down to unbuckle the safety harness. Joker sucked in a sharp breath when the back of her hand brushed across his ribcage, but when she opened her mouth to say something he shook his head. "Don't forget this has happened before, Liara," he choked out through gritted teeth. "I was a real fragile kid. I can handle it."
"I will find some medigel as soon as possible, Joker." As tenderly as she could, she picked him up in the same way she had Kaidan, easing out of the cockpit entrance and back to the CIC.
"You know, this is never quite what I imagined when I dreamed about an asari holding me in her arms," Joker quipped, and Liara couldn't help but laugh.
"I am sorry if I disappoint you, Joker," she chuckled in response. "Once we get you patched up, if you still need some... oh, what did Garrus say you humans call it? Coodles?"
"Cuddles!" Joker snickered. "Remind me to ask Shepard if - " He stopped, and they both looked away from each other. The humor was gone from the air once again. Kaidan was still lying down on the floor in the CIC, but he turned his head towards them and Liara let out a sigh of relief. At least he could move. She twisted one of the chairs at the workstations near Kaidan around with her foot and nestled Joker down into it, trying to keep him in as much of a consistent position as possible. "I'll be right back," she promised, walking once more towards the emergency shaft. Just as she was leaving the room, though, she heard a voice say something quietly. She turned back around.
"What was that you said, Joker?"
His eyes were sad, anxious, searching for something within her face. "Where's EDI? She wasn't in the cockpit when I woke up." Liara paused, trying to come up with an acceptable answer. She had no idea where EDI was.
"I will look for her while I am out." He made no reply but his eyes whispered gratitude as she turned and set off once more. She had no idea where to start looking for other survivors - as she ran through a mental checklist of the bo - crewmembers she'd already found, she realized that she hadn't yet made it down to the shuttle bay. Vega and Cortez. The current state of the ship did not bode well for them, but Liara knew she had to go down there at least to confirm it. As she shimmied down the ladder at the far end of the room, her stomach turned. The jostling of the Normandy had knocked the shuttle off of its bearings, tossing it on the ground. Liara could see a mat of dark hair and an arm sprawling out from beneath the shuttle, the sleeve rolled up to the elbow.
"Oh goddess, no," Liara whispered to herself, even as she stepped closer to the wreckage. It was definitely Cortez - or at least half of him, anyway. Liara couldn't see his legs, but something told her that even if he had survived being crushed, he would've been in horrible pain until the internal bleeding ran its course. I will believe he died on impact, just like Chakwas. But where was the Lieutenant?
"James?" she called out hesitantly, expecting no answer. But a spark of hope fluttered in her chest and her heart beat wildly when she heard a strong voice come back with,
"Over here, Doc!" She sprinted to the weapons lockers, James' usual spot. And her face fell.
"James, oh no," she started, but he held up a hand to silence her.
"It doesn't hurt, Doc. I don't feel anything right now." A hint of a smile graced his lips and he motioned her closer. She knelt down on the ground beside him, examining the wound where his old workout pole had snapped in half, pinning him to the floor through his left shoulder. Even as she looked around it, trying to find a way to free him, she knew there was no hope of his survival. Vega knew it, too, but he seemed calm. Ready to go, almost.
"Is there anything I can do for you, Lieutenant Vega?" The white of his teeth flashed against his bronzed skin in a genuine smile.
"I'm all good, Doc, but thanks. You know, mi madre always said that working out too much would kill me someday." The irony and dark humor was not lost on Liara, but she could not find it in herself to laugh. Not now. She felt a warm hand wrap around hers and she squeezed it back in reply. "Actually, Doc..." Vega began to say something, and then stopped. "Do asari sing? Is that common for you guys?"
"Poetry is a more preferred art form in our society, but we do have singers, yes."
"Could you... sing to me? Or say a poem, or anything really?"
The request was so simple, so unexpected coming from this krogan-sized human who, as always, appeared larger than life, even as Death came to carry him away. She nodded and gave him a tiny smile, scooting around behind him to let his head rest in her lap rather than on the ammo box it was currently nestled against. He sighed in relief as his neck straightened into a more comfortable position, and he folded his muscled arms across his stomach. Liara ran a hand through his short, dark hair absentmindedly, remembering how kind and polite he had always been to her. How good of a friend, and a soldier, he was. Is.
The human looked up at her, almost bashfully. "You don't have to if you don't want, Doc."
"I would love to. I have a horrible singing voice, Lieutenant, but I do know some poems. Would you like to hear a few that Shepard once told me about? She overheard a krogan reciting them to his asari lover, in hopes of gaining her complete affection. He was quite smitten, apparently." The lieutenant grinned up at her and nodded his approval, and so she began.
"All right, here's the first one. 'Oh Blue Rose of Illium, let your roots dig deep into the hot soil of Tuchanka. Let our scorching sun and sheeting rain turn your supple beauty into strength. For if our love is to survive, it must grow thorns to pierce the hand of any that would uproot it!" She chuckled along with Vega at the somewhat stumbling nature of the words, though she knew they both recognized just how sweet it truly was. "And then the next part went something like...
'Blue Rose of Illium, you have blossomed in a tower of glass and plastic. But beauty under glass is untested and weak. Where are your honored dead, to fertilize the ground that you might grow strong? On the rocky plains of Tuchanka, I will build you a garden from the bones of my ancestors. And then the last part, are you ready Lieutenant?" His eyelids were slowly drooping, but he nodded, still smiling.
"Blue Rose of Illium, leave eternity unembraced and grapple in the glorious struggle that is us, here and now! I am speechless, not with blood rage, but with love, and I stand here, humble and mute, to offer you a home. Come to me, Blue Rose of Illium. Let our three hearts beat as two."
"Damn, that asari must've been something, huh?" James muttered good-naturedly, winking at Liara. "You know, I think we found a datapad on a mission once with some kind of message about a rose of Illium. You think that might've been the same krogan?" Liara thought about it for a moment.
"That's very likely, Lieutenant."
"Actually, I may still have a copy of that file on my omnitool. Mind if I have a turn at reciting poems, Doc?"
"Certainly not. I would love to hear one from you." As long as he was talking, he was live, she thought to herself. Anything to convince herself that the iron rod puncturing his shoulder wasn't really there, it was all just some illusion that's all. That was it.
James took as deep of a breath as he could muster. "All right, Doc, here's what that krogan said.
"O Blue Rose of Illium, if these humble words reach you, then I have joined my ancestors. My -" Vega's voice faltered and he coughed harshly, specks of blood appearing on his palm. "My dream was to be by your side, a weed beside your beauty, twining together in the warm Tuchanka sun. But if my last days must be with krannt instead of kindness..." Another series of violent coughs, but he continued on, though his voice was growing steadily and steadily quieter. "Still, I will remember the perfume of your scent and ...the soft touch of your petals. Let my broken bones build... a wall around..." - cough - "your garden, so you and the flower we...We..."
And Lieutenant Vega spoke no more.
Liara bowed her head and said a prayer to the Goddess for this fallen warrior, who had deserved so much more than an end like this. They had all deserved more than this - being crushed by the ship that was their home, never knowing if the galaxy was truly safe from the Reapers. Never knowing if Shepard had succeeded, or if she was even still alive. Who's to say the Reapers wouldn't descend minutes from now, wiping away their existence as the last traces of their cycle?
The asari placed a hand over the Lieutenant's eyes and closed them, extricating herself from underneath his head and laying him down as gently as possible. "May your God find you and bring you home, James," she whispered, tears finally beginning to roll down her cheeks. She didn't know that she could take much more of this, finding her dearest friends' bodies scattered like ragdolls throughout this ship that she had loved and called home for so long. She dragged her weary body back up the ladder, returning to the CIC. Joker looked up when she entered, and she shook her head.
"I haven't found EDI yet. I'm sorry. Later, I will continue to look but for now..." Kaidan sat up slowly as she paused, looking between her and Joker. "For now, I need to rest. Are you both feeling okay?" Both men nodded slowly, looking away from her eyes. She heaved a deep sigh and slumped into the chair next to Joker's and rubbed her eyes wearily. Kaidan laid back down on the floor, and before Liara realized it he was sound asleep. She didn't have the heart, nor the strength to force him to stay awake at this point.
Suddenly, a loud flanging scream echoed throughout the ship, and Liara leapt to her feet unsteadily.
"Garrus?" she cried out, looking around frantically. The cry came again, from somewhere above her. Joker looked at her and pointed at the ceiling. It hadn't occurred to her that he might be there, but now she felt like an idiot for not thinking about it. She wearily jogged to the nearest emergency ladder and scaled it as fast as she could manage, forcing her hands not to shake with exhaustion. Luckily, the tunnel led directly into Shepard's closet so there'd be no need to bypass the door. "Garrus?" she called again, praying for an answer. There was a soft grunt from the bedroom, and she slid through the half-open closet door to see Garrus sprawled on his back across the carpet beside Shepard's bed. There was water everywhere, and fish, and... Oh, Goddess, what will Shepard think when she -
The fish tank was gone. Completely destroyed. Huge glass shards littered the floor, some piled on top of the groaning turian. Blue blood mingled with water and soaked into the carpet, spongy beneath her feet as she cautiously approached him.
"Liara," he gasped, turning his head towards her. "Thank the spirits, you're alive."
"I'm here, Garrus," she said as calmly as she could. "What are you doing up here? I thought you'd have been in the battery, or in engineering." He shook his head, and a wave of sadness washed over his face.
"I just figured that, if something happened and we didn't make it... Well..."
"Well what, Garrus?"
"I figured that if I died in here, with all of Shepard's things, it would make me feel at least a little closer to her. Reassure me in death or some shit like that, I don't know."
Liara nodded slowly as she began to understand. "Okay, Garrus. But we need to get you some medigel, right away. Your leg is..." She couldn't quite describe how bad his leg was. One of the larger chunks of glass had apparently managed to slide through one of the vulnerable cracks in his armor, slicing through a large portion of his knee. "Damaged. Your leg is pretty badly damaged."
"Shepard keeps a first aid kit under the sink," Garrus replied. "There should be plenty of dextro supplies in there, too." Liara nodded and jogged to the bathroom, grabbing the small dustpan and handheld broom from the corner behind the toilet in addition to the medkit. She swept away as much of the glass as possible from the area beside Garrus, and knelt down to begin bandaging him up. It took a long time, but she finally concluded that she had done all she could for the time being.
"Can you stand?" she asked, as she swept more glass off of his scratched-up armor. He looked at her anxiously, shaking his head.
"I'd say that's a no, Liara, you did see my leg right?" She nodded in agreement and thought for a moment.
"I think I have enough strength in my amp to lift you."
"Are you sure, Liara? I don't want to strain your amp, we don't need any more brain injuries than what we might already have on our hands." Liara waved him off.
"I'll be fine, Garrus. I know my limits. Now, hold very still please." She stood up and steadied herself, reaching into the farthest depths of her body to summon whatever energy still remained. With the greatest single amount of focus she'd ever put towards anything, she threw out a lift field and managed to ease Garrus up on to the bed. She jogged over as he descended to the mattress and turned his head to the side, so his fringe didn't get harmed. "I won't be able to move you down with the others," she mused, looking over him one last time.
"Who all is 'the others'?"
"I've only found Joker and Kaidan alive so far," she said sadly, and he sighed, closing his eyes.
"Damn."
"I know," she said softly. "But the four of us are alive. And we have to be grateful for that."
"Liara... where are we?"
"I have no idea, Garrus. I haven't seen anything outside yet. I will ask Joker if he knows though, okay? For now, try to get some sleep. I will come up here to check on you as often as I can. Does your omnitool still work?" The turian flexed his fingers and the orange screen came to life, albeit much dimmer than usual.
"Enough to signal you if something goes wrong. Go on back down, see if Kaidan and Joker need anything. I'm fine for now." Liara nodded and turned to walk back to the closet. As she slipped through the door, Garrus asked one more question.
"Do you think Shepard made it, Liara?"
"To the Catalyst, or... survived?"
"Either," he muttered softly, and she was glad she couldn't see his face from behind the door.
"Honestly, I don't know Garrus. I really don't know." She shimmied back down the ladder before the turian could say anything else, and hot tears blinded her as she walked back towards the CIC. Thankfully, both of the men were asleep now, and she took advantage of the quiet moment and sunk back into the chair next to Joker, allowing sleep to overcome her emotionally and physically drained mind. Little did they know, it was the last peaceful rest most of them would have for a very long time to come.
