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"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same."
~Unknown
The beginning of the work week was surprisingly normal, even though every moment of the day was still shadowed by sadness over Edward's departure.
The day after Edward went away, Victoria and Bree left to return to their home on the big island, and so our house was once again quiet. It unsettled me being there with it so calm - no sounds of Bree playing, or my aunt and mother talking, or Edward there to keep me company.
It had felt amazing to have so much activity around the house during the early summer when the island was usually at its laziest. However, I was glad to be back at my familiar desk in the communications building.
A consistent routine was exactly what I knew I needed to pull me out of my despair at the possibilities of what could potentially happen with Edward being so far away.
The familiar scent of Bella's perfume hit me just before she leaned against the edge of my desk and pulled on my sleeve, motioning me to follow her.
"Smoke break," she said simply.
"Oh, I don't think I can leave right now-"
"I already cleared it. You're fine."
I smiled as I followed her outside. Sometimes Bella's forceful personality served us well. It felt good to be out in the sunshine after being inside all morning. It was one of the things I missed most from my long weekend with my family and friends.
Bella said nothing as she lit her cigarette and took a puff, but the agitated way she bounced her foot let me know that something was bothering her.
"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"
She smiled sadly. "How did you guess?"
"You're always calm, Bella. I've never seen you on edge before."
She blew out a breath of smoke as her eyes fell to her lap. "It's ridiculous," she said.
"I'm sure it's not."
"It is, but I'll tell you anyway. I almost wrote to your brother last night. I had my pen and paper ready and even knew what I wanted to say. I was so excited until I realized he's only been gone two days and I don't have an address for him yet because it hasn't been long enough for him to write to me."
"Oh, Bella…" I trailed off, not knowing what to say. I was thrilled that Edward and Bella had found each other, but it was clear the harsh reality of the short time they had had to get to know each other weighed heavily on Bella's mind.
I had no doubt they were perfect for each other. I had thought they were from the moment I met Bella, but I could certainly understand her anticipation to hear from him. I knew firsthand how difficult it was to be separated from someone for long periods of time.
I had been seeing Charles for two years before he was sent to the mainland for basic training, and even that separation was more than I could bear. I remembered endless nights of lying in bed wondering what he had done that day, how often he thought of me, how he was getting along with his fellow trainees. Every day was filled with thoughts of him.
I couldn't imagine having to endure that separation in the beginning stages of a relationship.
"I shouldn't be this anxious," Bella said. "Edward promised he would write. He told me he couldn't wait to receive letters from me and that it was the best way we had to really get to know each other."
"He will," I assured her. "My brother doesn't make promises lightly. And he's fascinated by you, Bella. He'll write whenever he gets where he's going."
"I know. I guess I just needed someone to remind me."
"You really have nothing to worry about, you know. I knew right away Edward would be taken with you, and it was written plain as day across his face they first time he saw you."
She grinned. "No one's ever looked at me like that before. I have to admit I was jealous of you before that night, Esme."
My eyebrows knit together. "Why?"
"I saw Edward looking at me the way Carlisle looks at you."
The way Carlisle looked at me?
I hadn't been aware that our attraction to each other was so obvious, but during the week of Edward's visit I had heard more about my potential relationship with Carlisle than ever before. It felt good to know my friends were all so supportive, even if that support sometimes bordered on them meddling in my affairs.
"Speaking of Carlisle," she continued, a wide smile curving her lips. "First date tomorrow."
I couldn't help but return her smile. "It's not like it'll be the first time we've been out together."
"True," she agreed. "But this is on a different level. It's exciting."
I had to agree with her. Despite my insistence that it was nothing to make a big show out of, I was quite excited for what the next day would bring.
"Just promise me you'll tell me all about it," she continued with a laugh.
"I'm sure you'll hear all about it before I even see you next."
She laughed lightly. "I'm sure you're right," she said, before becoming serious once again. "Thank you, Esme. For what you said. It helps to know there's someone who's been through it before."
I took her hand. "I do, Bella. I know exactly where you're coming from. Now come on, you've had your smoke break. Time to get back to work. We both had enough time off last week."
She rolled her eyes as she stood and put her cigarette out. "Yes, ma'am. I hope Carlisle appreciates how bossy you are," she teased.
I laughed. "I hope he does too. I guess we'll find out won't we?"
"That's the best part, Esme. All those little things you learn about each other."
"And you'll have that with my brother too," I assured her. "I promise."
oOoOoOo
Late the next morning Rose came to the house to help me get ready for my date with Carlisle. I had assured her I was perfectly capable of getting dressed on my own, and that it was nothing to make a production out of, but she wouldn't hear of it.
She insisted that although Carlisle and I had spent a great deal of time together already, there was no harm in looking a little special for our first official date.
I now sat, with my hair in curlers, tapping my fingers anxiously on the surface of my vanity as she sifted through the contents of my closet.
"What about this one?"
She walked out of the closet holding a white lace dress with a cinched black belt.
"Rose, that's one of my church dresses."
"Exactly," she replied. "Meaning it's one of your most beautiful dresses."
"I'm not sure I'm comfortable wearing white."
"Well I'm not letting you wear black. You're going on a date, not to a funeral."
I didn't intend it, but I knew my face fell slightly.
"I didn't mean that, Esme. I'm sorry."
"No," I told her. "It's me. I need to stop being so sensitive. Today is about beginning the rest of my life. I need to be positive."
"That's the spirit," she said, smiling. "Now, I have a solution. You're wearing your pretty new navy blue dress, and that's final. It looks perfect on you. He'll love it."
She was right of course. The dress was stunning, and as I twirled in the mirror, watching it sway around me, I found myself almost giddy with excitement.
Even though it didn't feel like a first date to me, it would be our first trip out alone together, and I knew it would feel different, more intimate, once he arrived to pick me up.
Rose found it highly amusing that Carlisle was borrowing Emmett's car for the afternoon, but I found it sweet that he wanted to do everything properly, including picking me up from my home and asking my father's permission to take me on a date.
"Where is he taking you?" Rose asked as I removed the curlers and adjusted the pins in my hair, creating a swept back look that perfectly complimented my dress.
"We're going to eat at a diner and catch a film."
Rose nodded. "Sounds like him."
"Yes, it does," I replied, laughing.
"Here," Rose said, coming up behind me and handing me a white sweater to put over my dress. "You'll probably get cold."
"Thank you, Rose."
She sat back down on the bed, and watched me for several minutes before speaking.
"He makes you happy." Her voice was quiet, but her words were powerful.
My hand stilled as I processed her words and the meaning behind them. Sometimes it was easy to get caught up in the fun and wonder of a new relationship, and I had to admit I had let it happen to me. And all the while Rose had been in the hovering in background, observing our interactions.
I turned around to look her in the eye. "Yes, Rose, he does."
She leaned forward and rested her arms on the front of her dress. "You remember the afternoon your mother had to call me because you had locked the door and were refusing to come out of your room? You had yelled at her – even cursed at her. She heard you throwing things. She was… She was terrified, Esme. She thought you were going to hurt yourself. Her face when she let me in…" Rose shuddered at the memory. "I don't ever want to see your mother look like that again. When you finally let me in you were curled up on the floor, too tired to yell at me. But your eyes said it, Esme. They were dead. You were breathing, but it was like the life had been pulled out of you."
She took a deep breath as I tried not to cry.
"I knew it wasn't rational but in that moment I never thought I would see you smile again," she continued. "I nearly gave up on you that day."
"I'm glad you didn't," I whispered.
"I'm glad I didn't either."
"I owe you for this, Rose; all of it. I would never have met Carlisle if it hadn't been for you."
She waved her right hand. "Nonsense, Esme. Technically you can thank the retaining wall at the park."
We both laughed, lightening the mood in the room instantly.
We quieted at the sound of a knock on the door downstairs. I quickly applied a fresh coat of lipstick and grabbed my small purse before we snuck onto the landing at the top of the stairs. I knew Carlisle wanted to do everything properly, which included asking my father's permission. My mother would fetch me when they were finished talking.
That didn't mean I didn't want to eavesdrop, though.
Rose and I silently slipped down the stairs till we were halfway to the foyer. I could hear muffled voices coming from the sitting room.
My mother passed by, smirking as she made her way down the hall. She shook her head and laughed lightly as she walked into the kitchen.
I turned to see Rose stretching her neck to better hear the conversation taking place. She pointed down the stairs, and I got the message. She wanted to move closer.
We made our way quietly down to stand on the third and forth steps and pressed our ears to the wall. The muffled voices came in more clearly than I had assumed they would.
"It sounds like the base is lucky to have such a capable physician on staff. I have to say, the stitches you gave Esme healed that cut in no time."
My father's voice was full of pride, making me smile as I imagined how nervous Carlisle probably was.
"Thank you, sir. It's an incredible honor to serve on Pearl. I would never take the opportunity I've been given lightly."
Carlisle sounded so sure of himself as he spoke. I knew my father would more than approve of our dating. Anyone who could speak to him without wavering had his seal of approval.
"I hope you also realize what an honor it is to date my daughter," my father teased, laughing lightly.
Rose started to laugh and quickly clapped a hand over her mouth, looking up at me. I rolled my eyes at her and listened more closely.
"I do, sir. Esme is an amazing woman. I'm lucky to have met her."
I smiled as the familiar rush of warmth flooded my body.
"Well, I have to say I'm damn proud to let you take my girl out. I have only one requirement."
My eyebrows shot up. What was my father doing?
Carlisle's voice was full of well hidden trepidation when he responded. "What's that, sir?"
"Make my princess smile, Cullen."
No need to worry,Father. He already has that covered.
Rose turned and pushed me up the stairs when we heard the scrape of chairs against the floor. Barely a minute later, my mother came up to play her part and tell me Carlisle was waiting for me.
I had no idea what Rose was still doing there at that point, and honestly I didn't care. I walked down the stairs faster than I probably should have, and was met with the most incredible sight when I entered the foyer.
Some irrational side of me was acting like I had never even seenCarlisle before. He was leaning against the wall beside the door, holding a bouquet of pink roses. His khaki trousers and white shirt were nothing I hadn't seen on him before, but something about them made him more stunning than usual.
Maybe it was the fact that this was our actual first date. I may not have wanted to make a big deal out of it, but seeing him standing there, holding a bouquet of flowers and wearing that shy smile that was reserved only for me, made me realize it was in fact special.
My father came out of the sitting room before I had a chance to move. He gave me a small smirk and patted my arm as he passed.
"You two kids ought to get going. Don't want to miss your film."
I hugged my father before he disappeared down the hall. I slowly made my way to Carlisle as he stretched out his hand, offering me the flowers.
"They're beautiful," I told him. "But you didn't need to bring me anything."
"I wanted too. I wanted to see your eyes light up when you saw them."
I was about to excuse myself to the kitchen for a vase when my mother appeared from the dining room carrying one that was already filled with water. I knew my father must have told her about the flowers.
"They'll look wonderful here on the table," she said as I handed her the bouquet. She put them in the vase and placed it on the thin table that stood against the wall.
"There," she said. "Just beautiful." She turned to Carlisle. "You know how to choose flowers, young man. I'll give you that."
Carlisle gave her a sheepish grin. "Thank you, ma'am."
"Well, don't let me keep you. You kids go have fun."
She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before ushering us out the door.
Carlisle lifted my hand and placed a kiss on the back of it as he led me down the steps to where Emmett's car was waiting in the driveway. He opened the passenger door and helped me in, before settling in for the drive across town.
We had both agreed that a quiet afternoon in Pearl City would be more enjoyable than the hustle and bustle of Honolulu. It was more heavily protected by the military police due to its close proximity to both Pearl Harbor and Hickham, but neither of us cared.
"I hope you don't mind if we take the scenic route," Carlisle said as he started the car.
I shook my head. "Of course not."
He started down the road that led away from the highway and looped around the city, against the base of the foothills.
As I looked out the driver's side window I could see all of Honolulu and the bay. It was an incredible view.
He grinned. "I knew you would like coming this way."
"It's beautiful," I replied.
"Have you spent time in Pearl City before?" he asked.
"No. I've been through it, and stopped to eat once, but I've never explored it."
"I think you'll like it. It's very relaxing. I figured it would be the perfect place to spend an afternoon with a beautiful woman."
I couldn't help but blush.
"So where is it that you're taking me to eat?"
"Just a little diner the locals all recommend."
"And Emmett didn't mind letting you steal his car for the day?"
Carlisle smiled as we turned toward the bay on the west side of the city and headed toward the highway that would take us past the base.
"He was thrilled to offer it to me. Said something about it being about time I took you on a proper date."
I laughed. "Well, I think you had perfect timing. How did you get off work anyway?
He shrugged. "It wasn't really that hard. One of the other doctors was glad to cover for me. He said I don't get out much and deserved a day off."
We lapsed into comfortable silence as the scenery changed from lush tropical forest, to busy city, to quaint village. I watched out the window as we passed small shops and eateries. Many families were out, mingling seamlessly with sailors, flyboys, and military police. It was the perfect little military town.
Carlisle pulled up in front of an out of the way little diner about halfway down the main street running through town. It was the kind of place I would never have thought to stop at on my own, but the more I thought about it, the more I already loved the place.
He came around the front of the car and opened the door, offering a hand to help me out. It was an incredibly sweet gesture.
I slipped my arm through his as we entered the diner. It was virtually empty being a Tuesday afternoon, and we were able to find a corner booth by the windows overlooking the water. It was the perfect setting for a first date.
After handing us each a menu and ordering a glass of water for Carlisle and a milkshake for me, the waitress disappeared into the kitchen, leaving us with only one other couple in the diner.
I sipped my milkshake and watched the cars go by outside.
"I like it here," I finally said. "It's peaceful."
Carlisle nodded. "That's why I brought you out here today. You've had a busy couple of weeks. You needed a break."
"Well, thank you for bringing me here. I really do love it."
Before he had a chance to respond, the waitress returned to take our orders. We both ordered simple sandwiches and another milkshake for me.
Carlisle looked amused once we were alone again.
"You seem to love milkshakes today," he observed.
I smiled. "I always do. I just rarely get to indulge anymore. My mother is strict about rationing."
"There's nothing wrong with that. She's very patriotic. That much I've noticed in the two times I've now met her."
I nodded. "Yes, everyone in my family is. No one should have been surprised when Edward enlisted."
"Were they?" Carlisle seemed surprised by this possibility.
"My grandfather was. Edward was always very academic. Our grandfather expected him to immediately follow our father's footsteps into law. Of course, when the attack on Pearl happened Edward would have enlisted right away, but no one really believed he would beforehand until the day he did."
Carlisle's eyebrows knit together. "I thought Edward looked up to Charles and wanted to emulate him?"
"He did, but our parents never took him seriously. Not until he came home with enlistment papers."
Carlisle nodded as the waitress brought us our food. "I can understand that. Growing up, every time I tried to start a conversation about wanting to sign up, my father would change the subject back to the church. I knew I would have to take matters into my own hands to make him see I was serious."
I hated that his father was so set on Carlisle following in his footsteps at all costs. Being a doctor made Carlisle happy. Being a sailor made him happy. Perhaps even I made him happy.
We would never have met if it hadn't been for him enlisting. I would always be glad he did, even if I never understood what such an amazing man saw in me.
"Have you seen Bella since your brother left?" he asked suddenly.
"She was at work yesterday, why?"
"I was just wondering how she's doing...with regards to your brother and all. It can't be easy being left behind when a relationship is just barely being formed. I know I would hate to be separated from you right now."
I smiled sadly. I would hate that, too, but it was always a possibility.
"She misses him," I replied. "She'll be okay, though. Bella's tough."
"True," he agreed. "Still, it must be difficult for her."
"It is." My voice quieted. "And you know there's always a possibility of us being separated. If you're transferred or assigned to a ship."
He reached across the table for my hand. Its smooth texture calmed me, and the solid force of his thumb rubbing slow circles on my palm calmed my fears.
"I know, Esme. But I don't want that possibility to change anything. It wouldn't, you know… Not for me."
I could see the question behind the pleading look in his eyes.
"It wouldn't change anything for me either," I confirmed.
His answering smile was brilliant. "Thank you."
"There's nothing to thank me for, Carlisle. It's the truth. I hate the thought of you being taken away, but I know it's possible. It doesn't affect my feelings for you."
"You're incredible, Esme. I'm lucky to have found you."
"We're both lucky," I said with a laugh.
He gripped my hand once before letting go to pay the bill the waitress had brought. I grabbed a peppermint from the counter before we left the diner and climbed back into the car to head to the theater.
The theater was nearly empty. Only a few small families sat in the rows around us. If felt strangely comforting to be able to sit in the dark with my hand in Carlisle's as the newsreel and then the film played.
When we exited the theater the sun was beginning to set. Carlisle drove back to my house along the same roads we had taken to Pearl City, holding my hand across the seat the entire time.
We didn't talk much, choosing to ride in comfortable silence instead. I was tired after the busy afternoon we had shared, but it was good kind of tired. I felt relaxed and at ease. By the time he pulled up the driveway to my house I was already lamenting that our day was over, even though I knew there would hopefully be many more to come.
He walked me to the door, still gripping my hand in his.
"I had an amazing time today, Carlisle," I said turning to face him.
"So did I, beautiful. So did I."
His arms enveloped me in a hug so forceful I was momentarily lifted off the ground. I laughed as he set me down and placed a soft kiss on my cheek, making my heart race.
"May I call you tomorrow?" he asked quietly.
"I would be quite disappointed if you didn't, Doctor Cullen."
Kaukau means 'food'. I wanted it to be 'date' but couldn't find it.
So… First date. How do you think it went? Have any fun first date stories? I can't share my best story so publicly. It's rather NSFW. And the rest are fairly boring.
AtR has moved onto to round two in Best Canon Pair and Best Carlisle in the Avant Garde Awards. Thank you to everyone who voted and don't forget to vote for your favorite in round two!
Thank you to Mackenzie, Lauren, and Kelley for being so incredible all the time. I love you girls.
And if by some miracle you're reading this, Elizabeth, happy birthday.
As always, thanks so much for reading! I'm going to try as hard as I can to go back to weekly updates on this story. Forgive me if it doesn't always work, but I'm going to try.
