This chapters deals with a mother's love, separation, honesty & Sansa's taste of the sacrifice of others.
I am glad you are well daughter. Your Lord Husband and your King need to talk. Let us walk for awhile.
I gather my cloak and I cast a meaningful look towards Sandor, my husband...I like the sound of that rolling off my tongue. I know my Lady Mother is full of questions of the how and why. Especially why him. She makes small talk of the weather. We find a stand of cotton wood trees where the horses are tethered. A felled tree is now our bench.
Are you really well ? Will you tell me of your time on the road with the Hound ? How it came to be that you love him ?
King's Landing wasn't what I expected mother. Full of false friends, deceit, greed and cruelty beyond measure. He had me beaten like a dog. He had me stripped in front of the court. He MADE me watch Ser Ilyn Payne... And I burst into tears. I tell her in between sobs of Sandor's kindness and words of wisdom. I even tell her of the cotton from the cotton wood tree and what he did for me then. I tell her about the town we stopped in for supplies. He thought it better I wait in a copse of wood while he went in to get jerked meat and wine. About the man who confronted me and tried to...
Sandor has been training me in hand to hand combat and small arms. I have the dagger I brought from King's Landing which is small but lethal if used properly. Don't come at em girl, wait until he comes to you then go up into his belly and work it around like you're stirring porridge. Knee him in the stones. Gouge his eyes with your fingers. Anyone coming for you here isn't going to care WHO you are, only that you are easy prey.
This is for your life, they will think nothing of taking yours, your maidenhead the shoes off your feet whatever they think they can or need. Do not falter it is you or them.
What about sword play I ask innocently.
He draws Bane over his shoulder and holds it in one hand. It is a great sword. Longer than I am tall. He holds it by the blade and motions for me to grasp it's grip which I do. As soon as Sandor releases his grip the blade noses into the dirt. I cannot lift it more than a foot off the ground with both hands. Well perhaps if you're in a tree you can drop it on their head he says with a smirk.
I go to town. Keep out of sight I will return shortly. And off he went with a brisk stride leaving me and Stranger, each eyeing the other with slight distrust. I go to find a cluster of sweet grass, he does upon occasion allow me to feed him, provided I drop it in front of him and back slowly away. I find what I sought and walk back to Stranger. His ears prick and he snorts stamping his feet his flanks quiver. I cock my head wondering what is amiss when I clammy hand envelopes my mouth and my captor snarls in my ear.
I did't think the big man would ever leave you. I want some of his honey, you give it to him why not share a little with me, huh little one ? He says all the while squeezing my left breast to the point of pain.
My dagger is in the hand clutching the grass, I don't care I stab backwards to plunge into his thigh and run. He shrieks and withdraws the dagger, I see it covered in blood about three inches up it's blade. He comes limping towards me clutching my knife now in his hand. I stumble backwards and I'm at Stranger side. He covers the distance waving my blade and says," Now I get poke you , you little BI... "
It was fast, before he could finish his sentence Stranger's hind legs lifted to kick the man in his head with his right hoof. Nothing but a wet pulp and mist remained where once his head sat. His corpse didn't appear to know it was dead at first, his arms flayed wildly and his knees buckled where he landed in a slumped mess of gore. He sat twitching for several moments before he lay still. His bowels let loose if the smell is any indication.
I stood there staring for long minutes until I heard the approach of someone. I peer around the trees to espy Sandor his carry sack bulging and a cloth wrapped something tucked up under his arm. He walks up eyes moving taking in everything in his surroundings until his eyes land on the cooling ruin of what was once a man. He rushes to me and asks if I'm alright. I stabbed him is all I could say. He goes and kicks over the corpse to see the the wet, red mess of his head and looks at my handy work. "Why did you not stab him again " he asks. I wanted to get away from him.
Never leave your weapon behind, girl is all he says.
I curse myself for stopping in the tavern for a pint of my own. Had I not done so I would have been here to stop the attack. It could have gone so very wrong had My Little Bird not fought back. I make a promise then and there that neither wine or mead shall ever pass my lips again.
That struck me as wrong and said as much. I told him it was easy for him but this was my first time defending myself and it turned out okay. He retorts only because Stranger removed his filthy head. He walks over to his dropped cloth parcel and hands it to me. I open it to find a small sword. It's not nearly as heavy as Bane but the heft feels good in my hand. I proceeded to learn basic swordplay from a Master.
My mother says not a word with pursed lips as I continue my tale.
In the beginning Sandor would disarm me with ease. We would practice with sticks. More than one day I went to sleep with the throbbing of wrist or smacked knuckles. I complained bitterly one day before we started our daily round of practice. He said only, get better and it won't hurt. It angered me and I decided then and there I would not falter no matter how badly it hurt. I also decided I would not be satisfied until for once, I could disarm him.
That day came when he decided we would practice with dual weaponry. Sword and dagger. I cam at him with fury. I remembered every horrible experience I'd endured over the past thirteen months, the pain and humiliation the horror of it all. I spun, slashed, parried, lunged and whirled to spin and land a resounding thunk on the back of head, kicked the back of his knee to unbalance him then jabbed him savagely in his man parts with my stick dagger.
It would have been better he gasps had you...He falters and winces, alarmed I kneel to try and offer comfort when he grasps me and flips onto my back, winded, all thoughts of defense take flight. Quick he withdraws his real dagger to place at my throat.
NEVER, he thunders approach one wounded or " dead " unless by spear or sword point. Then only to finish him off. Do not assume that just because he's not moving he is dead. I've seen more than one man killed by a supposed " corpse ". He is above me on his side.
We are face to face.
I look into those all seeing eyes and I crane my neck upwards quickly to plant a kiss on the cheek of his bad side. He starts and for once my Protector is at a loss for words and movement. He still leans over me. I see shimmers of emotions roil behind those beautiful brown eyes.
He gets up swiftly and stalks off into the surrounding brush.
She kissed me...SHE kissed ME he screams in his mind...WHY ?! His great heart lurches within him to pound out a staccato rhythm of pain, fury, lust, need, want and...Love. He wages an internal battle between his mind and what she has just done..The She Wolf teases..It's not YOU, it's her need in a maturing body you fool. It would not matter if it was a minstrel or one of her false knights that was near her, only that he had a willing cock.
She deserves more. A man with vast holdings and lands and the proud banner of one of the great Houses who's lineage can be traced back to the first men. Not a house who's head is a ravenous animal on two legs. Who's house was formed only three generations ago and granted not by the King but a Lannister.
She KISSED me...thump, thump...SHE KISSED me..thumpa,thumpa...She kissed ME..bam,bam,bam goes my heart and a small smile ghosts on my lips..I will love her from this day till my end day..A small glimmer grows in my heart. I clutch it with greed to the innermost region of my beating heart...Maybe, just maybe if I prove myself worthy...STOP my mind rages..And what if she " loves " you..What then, what do you think her Brother the King will do on finding his sister and a daughter of Winterfell is soiled beyond repair by the likes of YOU ?! You will be beaten and caged like the dog you are, castrated to have your body dumped in the offal pit. There is Sandor Clegane who's tarred head now graces the walls of the great Keep of Winterfell. He was a brave but foolish man.
I search my gauntlet for a folded bit of paper and saunter over to my carry sack to rifle through it find my ink pot, Sansa sits honing her small dagger, eyeing me with curiosity. I sit down a few yards from the object of my life, my reason. I snap off a twig to use as a quill and commence to my prose, that IS what she wants, right ? I sit with a blank stare to what I have written on my paper." I love the way..I want you to know...I need... AARRGGHH.. with disgust I refold my paper and stuff it into my gauntlet to stalk off once again to clear my clouded mind.
I watch him through the corner of my eye. He sit's there with a distant look in his own eyes to smirk, shakes his shaggy head, screw his face into a grimace to finally fold the paper and stuff it into his gauntlet.. I muse to myself I wonder what I wouldn't find should I shake with vigor his gauntlets, it seems he uses them with frequency to carry, hide, pack bits of this and that... As he stretches a the paper falls to the ground as he stomps off to his thoughts.
After I am sure he is out of sight do I scurry over to the fallen bit , to open and read, in his own hand what he scribbled in his broad and surprisingly neat hand. It is a prose...Or the beginnings of one.
My thoughts are brought back to the present and my Lady Mother who's hand on mine breaks me away from the scenes in my mind.
He does have a love for you I see, says my mother.
Our musings drift by the wayside at the approach of my brother and husband. Now that I am relaxed I see with trepidation the lines of my brother's face. This war and the responsibilities he now carries are aging him. Sandor's eyes always open to me are now shadowed by something I cannot define.
So soon is all my mother says ?
She grasps me in an embrace so tight I can barely draw breath, she releases me with tears brimming her deep blue eyes. Next is Robb who also hugs me close and breaks the hug and steps back to search my face landing on my clear blue eyes to say.
No matter what comes to pass Sister always remember. You are a Stark of Winterfell and you have steel within you.
Soon for what ?
Come Little Bird , we ride this night.
