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Chapter 10: Carmen
"Yes?" It was a beautiful day. Blue sky, green grass, clear water and that hinge of spring air was just what she needed. She had been travelling a lot, up and down the region just trying to have a good time. It had been the time for her to return though, having been on the road for close to two months now. She was never an avid Pokémon trainer, despite her relatives being generally high-ranked among societies for their Pokémon-related activities. To be quite honest, she never did feel the need to. All she wanted was to have a kid to take care of after all. Raising that child was, surprisingly, the best part of her life, but that was not without resentment. Nurturing such a problem individual was not easy, and now that it was over, she had to use her time to pamper herself. It did not hurt to have a good conversation once in a while though. "Who is this?"
"Mom?" Speak of the devil, "I need to talk to you about something."
"Why of course dear," Penny would have liked nothing more. Living by herself had its own merits, but it got lonely from time to time. That would be why she was travelling so much in the first place. Nothing really beat a call from her lovely daughter, however. It was not hard for her to notice the tone in the psychic's voice, though. There was obviously something wrong, and if anything she would like to be there and help fix that problem. "I will always have time for you, drop by whenever you want."
"Thank you mother," A moment of pause, then spoken the one thing, which she would never have expected. "I'm glad I have you right now."
"Of course dear." Sabrina hung up the phone quickly after, and she would not have been able to see the face of her mother anyway. Penny's eyes were sparkling with energy and her hands were pumped with commitment. Her daughter has finally needed her again. She felt like squealing. Calming herself down with a few deep breathes; she still boasted that bright smile on her face, as she dipped herself into the pool and brushed off the odd day's heat. This was her best day in a long time. She had so many things planned out to greet her daughter after she dries off. Perhaps a big meal, their old favorite DVD or even karaoke. The possibilities were endless.
…
"Hello dear!" Penny opened the door with a huge smile on her face. What she saw however, was not what she had expected at all. Sure, she never really got around to thinking what exactly her daughter might has been needing her for, but it was certainly not going to be that serious.
She might have just been very wrong.
Sabrina did not immediately answer. The psychic was simply standing there on the front porch, staring deeply into the broken night. It was certainly much later than Penny had expected, considering how they were not even living that far away from each other. The psychic, however, did give out a worrying vibe that her mother was able to pick up almost instantly. "What is the matter dear?"
"Can I go in first?" Chilling voice lead the mother to predict it was nothing but bad news. She simply stood aside and allowed her daughter the entrance. The psychic was quick with her movements, simply stepping into the luxurious condo that was her mother's place. She had been living her entire childhood here, and there had always been something inside her telling her to come back here when she really needed help. She was just hoping that her trip was worth it. As she entered and rested upon the couch in the living room, her mother sealed the door and soon joined her in sitting. "Mom…"
"Yes dear?" Penny was now starting to look worried. Her daughter was neither being snide nor bitter like normal when the two of them met, but instead just appeared depressed. She knew her child had always been a dark and spiritual kid, but the psychic was never the kind to get too emotional off of much of anything, and this had been nothing but discarding that belief. "What did you come here to talk about?"
"Mom, have you…" Sabrina was taking her time with the story. Her hands clutching to the leather beneath it, she pushed out each word through a single breath. It did take a while, but her message got through barely coherent. "Have you ever been so scared of doing something yet felt like you have to do it?"
"Why do you ask such a thing dear?" Penny was starting to understand how her daughter was not faring well. It was not even anything strange, but only her daughter being human, just like everyone else. The psychic had been putting up bravado for so long that even her own mother had begun to judge her and think of her differently. Penny knew her daughter though, at least as a child.
"Please just answer me, mother." It was obvious that Sabrina was being deeply troubled by her thoughts. Her mind had been stuck within this mess ever since her visit to the Pokémon League a few days ago. It got so bad that she had to discard every part of the image she had been trying to put up for quite a while and opted to ask her mother for help. It certainly was not easy, but what she had been experiencing warranted even that kind of advice. "Have you?"
"Certainly, dear. Your father was certainly one of them." Sabrina looked at her mother astonishingly. That was not exactly that kind of answer she thought her mother would give. Penny just smiled as she ran her finger through that lavish long dark hair, admiring its textures. "There is no need to act so surprised honey. It did not mean I love him or anything."
"What exactly do you mean by that then?" More questions come, but Penny knew better than letting those swarm her. She was supposed to be the calm and collective mother after all, and this was all instinctive to her.
"I took a huge gamble on him, dear. He was always such a hard head, but he seemed so trust worthy, and also I was impatient, that I decided to go for it." She reached her hand out and pulled the psychic in for an embrace. Sabrina was certainly much bigger now than she was when they used to do this frequently, but Penny's love for her daughter had not diminished at all. If anything, it had grown immensely since then, despite the obvious lack of respect that her once childish offspring was no longer giving her. "He turned out to be the most trustworthy person I could have found. Without him, you would not have existed, and we would not be here together right now."
"He loved you didn't he?" Sabrina, her head well rested within her mother's embrace, asked something that she had been meaning to for a long time now. Back when she was still a kid living with her parents, the two of them were so different that a lot of times she did not even know who to turn to. Eventually she took after her mother, but that was not to say that her father did not support that notion. "He did all of this just to be with you for all of those years."
"I believe so, that bastard; even though I told him I would never love him." Penny laughed slightly. Her daughter's words certainly brought back memories. She supposed she was being unfair to her daughter's father, but then again he quite literally asked for it. There was not a fraction of guilt upon her conscience, but it did remind her of him quite often. "He stuck with me anyways; even helped me raised my child half decently."
"So did it pay off in the end?" Sabrina spoke lightly, as she could feel her mother slowly nod in agreement. She was now leaning completely towards Penny, as this was definitely an emotional childhood moment she was experiencing again. It was something she had not feel in a long time, so she might as well enjoy it while it lasted. "It was not easy though, right?"
"Oh hell no," Penny lightly placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead. All of this, without a doubt, gave her a lot more insight into her daughter's mind and how she should deal with this situation. "It was definitely the rocky road in. We did not have enough in common, and we would fight constantly over the pettiest thing. If only artificial fertilization existed back then things were a lot easier, so I would not have to have sex with him when I felt like gutting him."
"Mom!"
"Sorry dear, I know you do not like to hear that kind of things." Penny poked the psychic's cheeks a little as if they were inflated with red. Sabrina did not react too harshly to that though. She did not respond positively, but she did not outright brush it off either. "Still, looking at the end results, I can tell you it was all worth it."
"Do you really love me that much mom?" Sabrina had never quite understood the position her mother was coming from, as she obviously had never given birth before. Sure, when she was young, times were nice and the two of them got along comfortably well. When her teenage years rolled around, however, her mom suddenly seemed so far apart that she felt that she should act the same. It had been almost a decade now and their relationship had yet to change for the better. If someone would act like that to her, Sabrina would be assured to break them. "I mean I have not been treating you in the best ways."
"Oh silly, I would always love you that much." Penny playfully stretched her hands to the side, letting her daughter drop to her lap. "I took all of those risks for a reason, and I AM your mother."
"So are you saying that I should just go for it?" Sabrina, at this epitome of emotions, finally decided to ask the one thing that she came here for. She felt like her mother did not need her to provide the context, which she had been afraid to mention, and simply would just give her the answer she wanted.
"If you feel like it's worth it." A beaming smile greeted her thoughts. "Go for it."
…
"Right…" Sabrina wakes up on the queen-sized bed. The new day's light was already shining upon her face, waking her up from a shallow slumber. Looking around, her mother was nowhere to be found. For all she knew, Penny could be driving to Johto right in that Cadillac, but it was not of her concerns. It was all symbolism after all. Her mother wanted her to deal with this by herself, and she will. It had been a long while since she had slept in this bed; Sabrina noted. Way back when she used to have nightmares and would climb into her mother's bed. It was a sign of reassurance, and if her mother's inability to be here for her was one, she would just take it. "Another trip to Celadon."
Toughened up her own skin was what she needed to do, Sabrina thought. This would not be easy, but she got herself into this mess after all. It was now her problem that she must pull out of. Taking no more time, she quickly exited the house. The place was only a few minutes' walk from the main streets, so she opted to do that instead. Once there, it was simply a matter of deciding whether she would be better off taking the S.S. Anne once again or just get taxi to drive her all the way there. She figured it would be best not to have to deal with distractions of switching transportation. Decided upon that, she went and called a cab, simplistic and to the point.
The road trip was not nearly as calming as she thought it would be however, as time and time again her concentration was broken by honking car noises, the driver trying to make small talk or the fact that traffic was not being kind to her cause whatsoever.
Or perhaps it was the fact that she could not stop thinking.
