A/N: Hey! It's been a month already? Jeez time flies. No seriously, I only knew that since I just checked when I last updated. WHOOPSIE.

Wow, 8 reviews. Awesome. Thanks you guys!

Whoo, long chapter

So far the Traffic is almost 5,000 so a thank you goes out to everyone who has read this story this far. It's been fun. Oh no, don't worry, it's not even half over yet haha.

Katie, you wanted me to update before Thanksgiving. I did as you asked. Kinda. Maybe. No? Eh close enough. Thanks for reviewing ;P

Firefreck, thanks for liking chapter 6 haha. Nice name by the way

Also, big thanks for Credete for being patient with me when I kept falling asleep while he was editing it xD;; I feel bad, since I just suddenly konk out without warning and he's left there like "hello...?" So, yeah, sorry Credete D: And thank you so much!

OK, so I'm stuck on a part in the next chapter and homework's hammering me down. Don't really do anything in school though... fuck I can't wait until next year, eh? I plan on taking an extra class to graduate early so I can enlist for winter boot camp for the Navy. *sigh* two more years. just two more... it seems so far away ;_;

Yay, so my month-long sickness is almost gone. That's good. Just coughing right now, although that has gotten worse I no longer have runny noses- yay. Blah. Yes, I've been sick for over a month. It sucks.

If you are still reading this, cookie for you. If you are still reading this and haven't figured out that I'm hyped up on Ginger Ale and pecan pie, give me back my cookie.

Hahaha, this story has twice as much of hits than My Life. I find that funny since My Life is my first story and I honestly have been trying to keep it my main goal. If you haven't noticed, this has switched to here and now I feel immense guilt for those who like My Life. Nuttex, I feel really bad since you've been waiting forever for me to update but do not worry, once I get passed one part it will be updated. This weekend in the MOST. Tomorrow in the LEAST.

My sister's birthday is tomorrow! :D She'll be an official adult. *sniffs* I'm so happy, now I can constantly annoy an adult. You have no idea what's in store for her saturday. Muahaha. Yes, I would find it bad if I started annoying her on her birthday. Odd for the youngest of two? Yes. Am I ashamed of it? Fuck yeah. Too polite for my own good. And here I am swearing to whoever is reading this (damn I would feel bad if I was the one tampering a little kid's mind with cuss words... although, I don't really like kids, so it balances out). Which isn't polite... OK I'm poilte to people that I know. Happy? ;P

Haha, so this weird person randomly added me as a friend on Xbox Live the other night, and he starts asking my name and my age. So I tell him, and he's like "me too :D" so now I'm wondering if he's the kind of person that creeps on little girls and want to fuck with their minds or something. Meh, oh well. He told me to text him, and since I don't have a phone (and proud of it), he hasn't talked to me since. Yay :D

Ok, enough of my personal talkings. Have an awesome holiday weekend/week/Thanksgiving/November25 and enjoy!

The sun shown over Reach, spreading its warmth through the leaves and warming my face as the grass tickled my legs. My shoulders shifted against the tree trunk, folded hands resting on my belly. I stared up at the sky through the cracks and gaps in the leaves, enjoying the rare day-off. A particularly large shadow was next to me, the source of it up in the tree above. I peered up to my fourteen year old friend, smiling as I watched him with his hands behind his head, a leg dangling from his tree branch. The silence was broken, but the warm voice that rose from his chest kept its peace.

"What do you think is outside?" I raised an eyebrow, confused but smiling nonetheless.

"What do you mean? We're outside right now."

"No," he cracked open an eye, that all too familiar adventurous smile on his face. "I mean, what's outside here? What would it be like being..."

Normal?

I shrugged, closing my eyes.

"I don't know, why not ask Déjà the next time we have her?"

"She's an AI, she doesn't know what civilians do; only the facts and stories in the databases." He paused, thinking about it. "It must be boring, being a civilian I mean... where's the excitement? The action? The only thing I can think of that a civilian would find exciting is a movie or a fire. I mean, moving pictures? A little flare? Whoop-de-doo. Here we have guns, we learn how to fight, to live." I squinted up at him, a small frown on my features.

"Then why were you wondering about them, Mannie?" He didn't answer.

I leaned back, closing my eyes again.

He didn't have to.

I woke before dawn, the old memory still lingering in my mind.

That was one of the few days we got to ourselves, one of the few days we got to do whatever we wanted. Only bad thing was that we had to stay in the designated area, that includes the barracks, the mess hall, the courtyard near the school, the training grounds, and anywhere else Spartans-in-training are allowed to go.

I stood and saw that John still hadn't moved from his spot. I scoffed, rolling my eyes before stretching. I got my under-armor and MJOLNIR armor on, leaving the helmet off for now. I made my way to the fire pit, having packed everything up. I kneeled and grabbed a box of matches, striking one and lighting the half burned wood. I stocked it with more wood, before sighing and falling back on my butt. I hissed, my back still sore, but better than last night. Sure it didn't help sleeping on the ground, but it must have been better than sleeping in my armor all night. Taking out my small pack full of MREs and other necessities, I grabbed a package. Glancing at John again, I took another out.

What? It won't do anyone good to have a half starved, cranky-assed leader.

A few minutes later, I was carrying the two ready MREs and my helmet over to John and plopped beside him. I dropped his food into his lap and placed my helmet to my side, preparing to dig right into mine. Putting the mash potatoes on one half of the bun, chicken and butter on the other, I squashed it together. Yup, even though I have time, I never get tired of the weird but good taste of MREs bring when you eat it like this. Half in my mouth, I cracked open an eye to see that he didn't even react. Huffing, I knocked on the side of his helmet.

"Yo, twinkletoes, it's time to eat." His helmet moved an inch in my direction, before moving back.

"Not hungry."

"Bullshit. Eat it before I make you." I watched out of the corner of my eye to see him pick up the MRE and put it to the side, and glared. "Well?"

"Already ate."

"Yeah, and I bet you got some sleep too. Did you really sit out here all night?" I took his silence as a 'yes'. I reached over and picked up the MRE and put it in front of his helmet. "Eat." He grunted and snatched the packet out of my hand, making me grin in triumph. The seals hissed, and he took off his helmet after a quick look around. I froze, wide eyed.

"What?" He turned his eyes to me and I snapped my eyes and mouth shut, shaking my head with a little too much force.

"Nothing!" I shoved my food in my mouth, keeping my eyes to the ground. He raised an eyebrow, but went back to his food and began eating. Mouth half full, I remembered something, making my half chewed food go down my throat and causing me to hammer on my chest to dislodge it. "Oh yeah! Didn't somebody say that some elites were going to be joining us?" I didn't look at him as I asked, just taking another smaller bite of my sandwich.

"Yes. We will be regrouping with them at noon. They'll be landing in a different LZ, so the group wouldn't be too big to get easily spotted." I nodded and we ate our meals in silence. I glanced at him when his seals hissed again, only to see his helmet on and him crumpling the wrappers up. I ate my last bite and did the same, tossing the garbage behind me, it landing in the fire as the rest of camp began to wake up. I shoved my helmet on and walked out of the campground, looking around. I turned back and watched the sunrise as the rest of the team got ready to head out.

… … … ... ... ... ... ...

It was an hour after dawn, and already we could see our objective. I stopped, gazing at it.

"Whoa…" Yeah, that is big.

"Split into two groups. Michael, you lead one while the Chief leads the other," Pfft. Of course he gets to lead. I thought grimly. "Take the four marines and two ODSTs; the rest of the ODSTs will come with us." Cortana spoke through John's helmet, with us standing for her; John and I. As we hit the trees, in one motion the large group split off.

"Michael, your team will take shore's side. We'll go head on through the entrance. Once we get through, have your team head for evac as the Chief and 113 go into the cartographer and retrieve the map. Keep a pelican waiting." They agreed and it was silent as the teams broke off, still enabling us to see each other through the trees.

About a half hour later, the objective got even bigger.

I stopped, gazing up at it.

"Holy shit... and we're suppose to find a map in that?" John paused, turning and pushing me forward to keep going.

"Yes, but we won't be able to with your mouth flapping." I wanted to shoot a glare at him, though thought differently and settled on glaring at his feet. Besides, he, nor anyone else for that matter, would be able see it anyways. I grumbled under my breath, hefting my shotgun and continued on, searching the trees for any sign of danger.

We reached the clearing with a straight shot to the entrance. John stopped before the tree line and signaled for us to take cover nearby. I put my back to a tree, glancing over my shoulder at the structure. Johnson said that the Covenant believed in something like a 'journey' and the 'four runners' or something. Gods I guess. They had built structures, like this, on the Halos and other worlds. Especially the Ark on Earth. Never been there, but I hear they're still recuperating.

I might not remember the names of the gods and the journey thing, but I do remember something. The Halos are a weapon, and we must not let the remainders of the Covenant to fire them.

"Jessica," I glared at the one who called me that in a hushed tone, before immediately looking away, gritting my teeth and clenching my eyes closed. "Go with Michael's team." He nodded to the other team leader. My eyes snapped open, wide, as my chest tightened. "Once I signal you, come to the entrance and we'll go in from there." I barely nodded and crept over to my new team leader, he and his squad only thirty feet away.

Go with Michael's team? By myself? Wait, a minute, Jessie. You don't need to have him on your team. This is what you've been wanting ever since training with him started. So man up and listen because the squad leader's moving his helmet like he's talking... Oh.

"Alright, move out." John gave the signal and our team went right of the trees, traveling as quietly as we could as team John's team disappeared out of view. I moved over to a marine, cursing my luck. I'm on the same team as Lopez, Tyler, and Dillon. Thinking quickly, I made my way over to Dillon, recognizing his bright blonde hair bangs sticking out through the helmet.

"Private," I whispered. He looked over at me. "What'd the squad leader say?"

"Quiet." Lopez whispered back, nodding to the squad leader as he looked back at us. I nodded to them and made my way over to the tree line, still traveling with the group. Being a seven foot tall metal man, I had to keep my head lower than the others.

"Shit, brutes are already here." I heard someone say, and I looked to the structure, taking out my scope. On the ledges were jackals and grunts stationed around and a few brutes here and there. I put away my scope just in time to not run into a marine. He was about to glare but stopped when he saw me and turned forward with a pale face. Heh heh, being a Spartan has its perks. Everyone stopped and gathered around the squad leader, two soldiers keeping a look out.

"Okay, here's the plan. You three," He pointed at my friends, "Will go left while you three," He pointed to two ODSTs and a marine, "Go in from the middle. I'll cover the Spartan." Oh, why am I getting a bad feeling? "Spartan," He turned to me. "You head for the water, the trees should end just a little bit before the shoreline. You head underwater and start going towards the structure and hit them from the rear." Oh, that's why. "By the time you surprise them, they'll be out in the open and it'll be too late for them to retreat. Everyone understand?" Everyone but me nodded. "Good, let's fall out." We traveled a bit more before the leader did a hand signal and my friends fell behind. After 25 feet he did the same thing and the ODSTs and marine fell back, staying there. The rock in my stomach grew heavier when we stopped at the tree line, the waves crashing up on the shore.

Yeah, I like water and all, but I don't like being underneath it. Have I ever told you that?

Nope. And weighing a ton has nothing to do with it.

He gave the signal, picking a target and headshotting a jackal. All three patrols burst from the trees, guns blazing. The enemy was taken by surprise, but a moment later they retaliated and started firing back. The leader nodded, my signal, but I hesitated, staring at my watery enemy.

A cry made me look back to the battle, mind buzzing as I watched a marine go down. Water or disobey orders?

Oh fuck it.

I burst from the trees, running straight into battle, alarms in my head going wild as I went against instincts. I've been trained since I was a kid never to disobey orders, not unless if it meant losing the battle.

I slung my shotgun from over my shoulder and shot it forward before snapping it back, pumping it one handedly. I shot a grunt's head off, unstrapped a SMG from my thigh, bullets from the SMG digging into a brute's shield and body.

Click. Click.

The empty cartridge dropped and I slipped in a new one single-handedly. Yup, being a Spartan has its perks.

Almost immediately all gunfire was directed at me as I ran, jumped, and flipped over dead or dying Covenant bodies. I pumped the shotgun again and swung the handheld gun into a jackal's neck, a juicy crunch being my reward.

I searched and spotted my next target. I jumped and landed on the brute's chest, knocking it down flat on its back as it roared. I shoved the nozzle of my shotgun down its throat and pulled the trigger.

Brains splattered everywhere before I looked up. All enemies neutralized. I looked towards the trees to see two bodies being hovered over. I blinked as I looked down and removed my shotgun from the blood pile that used to be its head, a trail of brain matter and blood following it. I shook the grime off and made my way over. One marine dead, the other body had some spikes through his stomach and chest; it was the squad leader. Two marines hovered over his body, doing all they could to get the spikes out and save their leader. While I was observing, I didn't notice the marine until his face was shoved in mine.

"This is your fault Spartan! If you had followed orders then this wouldn't have happened!" He screamed in my face, immediately recognizing Tyler. My eyes narrowed behind my shield but guilt already weighed in my gut, making me feel a lot heavier all of a sudden. If I did follow orders… would this all have been prevented? The thought bounced back and forth in my mind as the red-faced marine continued to scream at me. A click made me glance to the side before turning away from the pissed off marine.

"113!" A voice, hinted with annoyance, barked in my ear.

"What?" I had to resist the urge to rub my ear, since my helmet and all that.

"Don't you fucking "what" me you fucktard!" Tyler shrieked, thinking I was talking to him. He must really like the word fuck, he's said it 23 times already. I waved him off, making him even more pissed.

"Come to my position." John's naturally grave voice sounded in my ear.

"Roger." I turned back to my still screaming friend.

"This is your fault! This is your fault. I knew we couldn't trust Spartans! I knew that you guys were bad luck! I knew- Hey, get back here!" I was already a good five feet away when he noticed, thanks to my longer strides, and he took three steps to try and catch up. "Don't you fucking walk away from me!"

"Spartan." Oh no, John's starting to get impatient. Whatever shall I do? Maybe switch armor with him and have him deal with this screaming two year-old! Oh wait, we have the same armor. But still.

"I'm coming, I'm coming…" I waved off Tyler and continued to walk around the large structure; Tyler still screaming insults after me. Within minutes I was walking up the ramp; I spotted John standing at the entrance with a couple ODSTs keeping an eye out, though Cortana would be able to warn them if there were any hostiles. I didn't look at John, only walking within five feet of him, helmet facing him but I myself was looking away. A feeling stirred in my gut and I suppressed a shutter.

"Any casualties?" I heard Cortana ask.

"One marine dead, the squad leader is receiving medical treatment." I grumbled, still sour over the battle results. I feel dirty. I looked down at my gloved hands and grimaced. Little bits of brain and blood were splattered on them, my arms chest splattered with blue and dark orange blood, along with my shoes. I rubbed my hands together but only succeeded in smearing it more, brain bits falling to the ground. "You?" Cortana spoke for John again.

"Two ODSTs. Ready to go?" I nodded and John led the way into the structure, the shock troopers following. John took the lead and I followed behind him, keeping my distance as the four ODSTs followed in between and behind us.

"There's a chance that they contacted the others, so be ready for anything." Cortana murmured. I looked around, part of me fascinated with the structural design of the place while another part of me was a little creeped out for some reason.

I shuddered at the wonder of why the ceilings were so high.

"This is odd…" I looked ahead.

"What is Cortana?" I even had to convince myself that I'm only looking at Cortana, not John.

"The structure, it's different from the last Halo ring."

"How so?" I looked around again, trying to find anything out of place. This place was bare, except for the designs, doorways, and the occasional hallway going off in a different direction.

"Well, for starters, the last cartographer was underground." Okay, that's a good answer.

"Maybe every Halo ring is differently designed, to throw off intruders?" An ODST suggested, speaking up.

"Possibly," Cortana considered this option. "But the question is if they knew something like this would happen. If they knew the rings would be uncovered, that they would be attempted to be used as weapons." Silence hung in the air after that, everyone thinking about what she said. Minutes later, a different ODST broke the silence.

"Hey, does anyone else have the feeling that we're underground?" The group stopped, but John kept walking and we soon followed. I hesitated as the distance slowly increased between me and the group. A thought flashed through my mind, making me gulp and run to catch up with my comrades, keeping a weary eye on behind us.

I looked around, suddenly on high alert as my mind raced with unwanted thoughts. My head popped in the nearest door, the darkened room lit up with my flashlight. Clear. I repeated this action a few more times before John suddenly stopped and looked at me, the hair on my neck rising to tell me he was warning me. I turned off my flashlight, settling for my hand resting on my gun strapped to my hip, but my eyes still looked in each room and hall we passed.

What I'm experiencing is not paranoia.

Adrenaline raced through my veins, making me want to run and get the fuck out of here. My breathing quickened, my throat suddenly became dry.

No, this is another fear.

I've tried to keep them secret, but as you can see, some of fears are stronger than others. Some I cannot hide, like right now. Remember when I said that I accept death, even though I fear it? Yeah, I fear not just death, but the causes of it. Like being buried alive for example.

I blinked, tuning in for a second just to make sure nothing was going on before I went off into my own little world again.

Let's see if I can list all the things I'm afraid of.

Being buried alive, drowning, spiders, needles- Okay, I gave myself a few shots back on Reach but it was either that or risk infection. So there, meh. Okay, what else… Bugs, I hate bugs. Creep me the fuck out with how many eyes they have. I'm afraid of the color white. Yes, white, the color in the doctor offices. Doctors of course; don't trust them. Let's see… ah I can't remember anything else. Oh, hey, where do all these hallways lead to? Why aren't we going through them?

I glanced at the group, before slipping into the next hall we passed. I walked along, gun held at the ready as I looked back and forth. Huh, no doorways? That's odd…

It happened so fast that I couldn't even shout out in alarm. Someone grabbed my arm, spun me around, and began pushing me back the way I just came. I was about to go into panic mode when they hissed next to my ear.

"Don't touch anything, don't make a sound, and don'twander off. If I have to keep an eye on you every minute of this mission, I'm sending you back." I glared as best as I could at John before he gave me a shove when we reached the main hall where the rest of the group was waiting. John took the lead, and the ODSTs followed behind me. I rolled my eyes as I followed the 'o great leader'. I bet John told them to. Probably to make sure I don't wander off. Maybe I should just go back, it's better than being bored out of my mind underground. I glanced back where we came, mouth open to announce my decision, but the eerie hallway seemed endless and dark, making me change my mind.

If something were to get you, no one would hear your screams…

Okay, now where did that come from?

I waited for the creepy voice to do a little "muahaha" at the end, but it didn't come. I resisted the urge to sigh. Sighing would probably count as speaking in John's book. Damn his book. It's probably really long. Longer than the dictionary I bet. If I ever have to read his in order to figure stuff about him out then I'm just going to have to go with the old fashion way. Annoying the hell out of him until he cracks. He has pretty good patience though, so it could take quite a while… ah, who am I kidding, to him I've probably grown even more annoying then twelve years ago. Haha, probably because he's an old man now. Well, not really that old, only ten years older… that's not so bad. But still, he's ten years older than me, making him an old man. HA!

The grin vanished from my face and my eyes darted around, cheeks growing red before I paused in my footsteps, logic working at my mind. No one would be able to see my grin. Even if they did, they wouldn't hear my thoughts. My face returned to normal with a cheeky grin. Ha, I bet John has no idea what I'm thinking. That know it all, thinks he knows everything… he knows nothing of what I think. Heh heh heh.

"Spartan!" My head jerked up, looking around. I looked down to see an impatient ODST. "What's the hold up?"

"Oh, I was… sorry." I think being underground is making me a bit crazy. I hurried up to join the others and tried to keep my mind go blank.

It didn't take long for that to blow over.

My mind drifted to the past two weeks. Getting rescued, finding out we're allies with an alien race, meeting two okay friends and one douche bag of a friend that hates the actual person I am, seeing Mike and Jai… I felt my eyes start to tear up.

Everyone… almost everyone is gone…

I felt myself shake and silently begged that it didn't show. The last thing I need is having someone ask me if something was wrong then having my voice crack. But I just couldn't stop shaking. I bit my lip before I swallowed, keeping any and all sounds from escaping my throat.I've shown weakness once, and I will not do it again. Not now.

I took a shaky breath in, letting it out slowly through my nose as the tears went back in, never running.

You know when you want to cry so bad, even if there's no reason, you just want to cry and you're holding it in until you feel like your chest is going to burst? That's how I feel.

I breathed a soundless sigh.

And everything has changed. No more Reach, no more Harvest from what Johnson says, and hardly any Spartans. My throat tightened and I snapped my eyes shut.

God damn it… don't cry Jess… get it together… you can't appear weak, especially when there could be enemies around.

My guard went back up at the thought of the Covenant. Brutes, drones, grunts, hunters, elites… I shook my head. No, elites are our allies now. The event from a little over a week ago flashed through my mind and I cringed, trying to push those thoughts out. No, they are allies. What happened on Reach… What happened there is in the past.

Does that mean you forgive your family's murderers?

I tensed up, a shiver running up my spine. I clenched my eyes closed.

No, they are not… I won't forgive them. I'll never forgive them for killing my family. But I will give them a chance.

Why does it feel like I'm signing a death wish?