Hello? Yep, I am still alive and … it's almost a year since I updated this story. Huh, sorry? Well, real life has been all consuming and then there was this fucking writer's block. Ah well …
Now, here you get a new chapter, finally. I have been sitting on this one for … uh three months? And I am still not happy with it, probably because I changed a lot and didn't like the way this chapter was proceeding and then there were a few holes I had to repair … well.
Anyyyways I really hope you'll like this chapter. Also, somehow my laptop lost the function to tell me which words are actual English and which are not which means probably more mistakes in here than usual. Sorry.
As always, personal thanks are at the end of the chapter
For We Do What We Can
The whole hall is full with urgent whispers when she enters. Her muscles ache and her eyes are about to shut in exhaustion. Billy is next to her, eerily quiet. She doesn't like it. Red Fury is standing in the corner with her mother, Hank is sitting on one of the tables, surrounded by other heroes and maps of the city and different buildings.
"You know this is all your fault, right?", a voice says next to her.
"What?", Nora hisses, low enough that the conversation will stay between them. The girl who stepped next to her, throws her dark hair over her shoulder. Stella. She's one of he heroes that emerged out of need. Too young to fight in such a war, but had to. Just like them, just without the emotional baggage.
"Not just you", she says, looking down at her. "Your whole family, I've heard them talk, you know. Basically I hear everybody talk", she stops, presses her mouth together. "If you had kept Max under quarantine until we've cleared whether he was lying or not, all of this could have been avoided. You know I'm right." she sighs, shaking her head.
"There is a lot going on here, a lot I don't agree with, still", her gaze hardens. "If your parents hadn't sweet talked Red Fury into allowing Max all his freedom, Phoebe would still be here and not free with the most dangerous villain known."
Nora stares at Stella for a moment and swallows. She's right, she knows she is. Her family probably had begged Red Fury to go soft on Max without knowing what was really going on, without being certain. On top of that, they had been too overjoyed at having him back. They hadn't been thinking. Phoebe and Max, those two were one and the same, they couldn't go without one another, no matter how much they liked to pretend they did.
"Nora, we need to bring them back!".
"I know", she nods, pressing her lips together. "But … I fear that they will execute her. They will execute Phoebe and … even though I know what she did, she … she's still a part of this family. No matter how much I would like to pretend I don't care about her, the truth is I do. Also, I fear of what's going to happen if they will execute her. My parents will be devestated and Max-", she swallows- "Max will probably go crazy". She can feel Billy's arm around her shoulders, squeezing her to his body.
"Come with me", Stella says after a moment for the siblings to calm themselves down.
"Where to?", Billy asks, speaking up for the first time.
"Just .. come with me", she repeats, her voice much firmer now. Nora risks one last glance to her parents still tense around the other heroes and deeply in conversation and consideration.
"All right, it better be relevant".
Max is tense. His whole body feels ready to go, to attack, to do something. He really doesn't understand why that man is still here. The red lips pressed together, blood running down the Destroyer's chin. That was what he looked like when they locked him in his new cell. Still he looked … content. Like he was exactly where he wanted to be, like he'd planned everything.
That's not possible, Max knows, but it still gives him an uneasy feeling just thinking about it. He takes a few deep breaths and tries to concentrate. Phoebe's what's important now and they need to figure out their next steps.
It was dumb luck that Colossus had found them in the dark tunnels and told them about an abandoned building. All flats, perfect for now, but no final solution. Still, it's just recently abandoned that nothing's been touched yet and they are fairly certain that they won't be found. Not yet anyway. Still, he doesn't deem them save just yet. He's still on edge and that not only because of that creature with them. He's thinking of their safety, he's worried about Phoebe, of her state of mind.
She seems uneasy and skittish. Hard and confused. He wants to help, he really does, but he thinks she just needs some time on her own for now. He does long for some contact with her, wanting to be near her and being sure that she is alive, that she does actually breathe and her body is fine. He also would like to look at her wound. He wants to know if she might need stitches.
He holds himself back. No, he should give her some time first, to sort out her thoughts and feelings. Then he'll approach her.
Billy is watching Nora crefully. They went with Stella into her rooms and now are sitting on her bed. Nora is chewing her lower lip, staring at a dark spot on the blanket. They haven't spoken since Stella has left the room, claiming that she has to gather some things before they can start.
Billy isn't as stupid as many may believe. The good thing is though, that a lot of people keep on underestimating him as well, thinking we won't get it, when they present it in front of him. It's not a secret he yells out.
Nora was always the one who he confided in, who would get him and who is his best friend. He can't imagine losing her, one way or another. He ponders the thought, what he would do, would Nora change sides. She was always the smart one of them, the one with a plan, an idea and that little harmless mean streak. It's not hard to imagine that Max would follow Phoebe wherever she would go. He would do the same, stick to her like glue, be with her all the time. And he knows, even if Max and Phoebe try to hide it, that their connection was much stronger than theirs.
It's the little things, the way Max couldn't bear it if Phoebe was unhappy and the way Phoebe would always be there for Max as soon as he needed her. They tried to be bigger than that, to dismiss that fact, but Billy caught it. Because if there was one thing that he could do better than their siblings it was loving his family to pieces. He wanted all of them save and to be honest, the knowledge of Phoebe's impending doom (which was what one of the heroes called it) had him missing sleep.
He had ignored the voices outside, body weary with the few hours of sleep he would actually catch and the fact of losing his sister. Hearing Max for that rescue mission had made him feel lighter. Then again, it had taken everything in him to let Nora slip out of her bed and leave the room, creeping after Max.
"Here we are", Stella crows as she bangs the door open. Nora flinches and he doesn't blame his sister. Stella is loud. He guesses, that she doesn't even realise it, her voice being her source of her power and all of that.
"What did you find, why are we here?", she asks, narrowing her eyes and keeping them on their fellow hero.
Stella closes the door behind her with her foot and jumps between them on her bed. "The map, now we can really begin", she looks between him and Nora and then nods. "We need to do this right and you owe it to everyone here", she says, opening the map of Hiddenville, or what it once used to be.
"All right, let's go to work"
Billy yawns. He's watching Nora and Stella discussing and drawing on the map, hefting post it notes on it, removing them, putting them back. It's mostly the knowledge of their sister Stella wanted. Which places did she like, which did she connect to her brother, which were special and then also where were they taken to and later tortured. Why did she choose her later lair and what did it mean for Phoebe to have Max up and awake with her.
Nora was chewing on her bottom lip, brows drawn.
"I always thought it looked like a castle", Billy throws in, when boths girls stop talking.
"Well yeah, kinda. I guess Phoebe got used to it and I mean it was easily defended. All those super heroes have never been able to really get into it. She's been ruthless with it, casualties were … well, casualties".
"Do you think she is different now?", Billy asks his sister.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that, well, she has what she wanted, doesn't she?", Stella raises her head from the map, a disregarded post it note sticking to her cheek.
"What?"
"Shouldn't we just give them time? I mean, Max and Phoebe do have each other now and that's basically all Phoebe wanted, why she started all of it. Now, if we leave them, won't they just disappear, live in a little hut in a forest, eating berries all day and maybe going hunting-"
"Billy", Nora interrupts him in that tone, that tells him that apparently he said something stupid again. Stella though looks at him as if she just realised he was there. Maybe she did, because all those hours spent, she hasn't exchanged even one word with him which actually, is pretty rude, thinking about it.
"No, no, no, wait", she says. "Let's follow that thought, maybe not the living in a forest one, but before that. He's right. All she wanted was her twin. From what I've learned, she only became evil once Max was threatened. So what to do with a brother who is not able to defend himself in possible combat? Lock him in a castle and defend it to the death."
Nora watches Stella for a moment and then nods. "I mean, yeah that does make sense. It really, really does. But why start to terrorize the city? Wouldn't it be enough to just lock him in? I mean as long as he was in the hospital, Phoebe was fine. She was really tense all the time, barely slept and worried, but still, she was recognizable."
Stella looks down at the map again and starts writing on a post it note. "Did you … has she ever spoken about what she went through?", she asks, not looking up, sticking the post it note somewhere.
"No".
"So, there's a young girl, escaping a lunatic who abducted her and her brother, tortured both of them in a yet unknown way and then, after her brother falls in a coma just keeps going back to normal?"
"I mean, no", Nora says, looking down at the map. "She was quiet, always at Max's side and less … bubbly. Less herself, but at the same time I understood. I wouldn't be me if Billy were in a coma".
"I get that, I really do", Stella admits, "but don't you think she should have been more different? That's not an experience you just work through alone, especially if the repercussions were still right in front of her. No other changes in her demeanor? No talking with a psychiatrist?"
"A saiariacorist?", Billy asks, making Stella smile lightly. It doesn't feel like he is being laughed at, so he lets it slide.
"A psychiatrist, a person who has expert knowledge about the human psyche and can help people who endured traumatic experiences or have phobias".
"Nope, I don't think she ever saw one", Billy decides and Nora nods.
"She should have been examined, I don't get why she wasn't. It's not just her psyche, but also to what degree she was hurt physically and what kind of tort-"
"I doesn't matter, stop it", Nora interrupts heatedly, teeth grinding against each other. "She was fine … as fine as her situation allowed her to be and clear headed, she was the one who told us everything. When they came back I hugged her, I hugged her as tight as possible, telling myself that from now on I would be there for her to protect her. She was fine in her head!"
Stella only looks at her, her look almost pitying and as much as Billy liked the other superhero, he doesn't like the way she looks at his sister. He gets up and steps next to his sister, sliding a protective arm around her. Stella sighs and shakes her head. "I think, she was just as strong as she had to be. We have no real idea what games the Destroyer played with her mind, we just know she was strong enough to push herself and her brother out of the claws of that monster. That's so impressive, don't get me wrong, but it begs the question of how much she had to suppress to get through it. What has been lurking in her mind for her to get weak again to catch up to her."
Billy feels Nora tense further and squeezes her elbow softly.
"How much is her fault and how much isn't? We don't know what happened to Phoebe, we don't really know who she is by now, how much her experiences and other influences changed her. We have no idea who Phoebe Thunderman really is."
Phoebe's squeezing the dagger tightly in her grasp. The door to the room looks big, looks almost dangerous. That's stupid and Phoebe knows, still there is this nagging feeling and it won't leave her alone. She hates it, because it's not letting her think clearly.
He needs to suffer. He needs to die. After suffering, he needs to … he needs to-
"Come in", his voice calls her through the door. She's not even wondering how he knows she's there. She makes sure the dagger is still in her hand and then she opens the door. The Destroyer is sitting on a chair, leaning against the wall so he can supervise the whole room. He raises his head in interest when he sees her coming in cautiously. His bloody and bitten lips stretch into a bigger smile.
"Ah, Ms Thunderman, what a wonderful surprise", he says, his voice calm.
Phoebe grinds her teeth together. "Not for long", she whispers viciously, deciding last minute that coming closer might be more dangerous for her. She lets go of the dagger and instead lets it hover with the help of her telekinesis.
The man in front of her watches her with growing interest, grinning at the sight of the dagger.
"Very sensible, eliminating the threat before it's going to hurt you", he nods, praising her.
"You're not a threat, not anymore. You can't do anything without your powers and we're definitely not going to take the anklet off of you."
"Oh, please, I didn't expect that. So, you want to make me suffer for everything I did to you and your brother?", he asks and oh god, he almost sounds curious, interested. Why, why is he not afraid?
"... yes", the dagger in wobbling in the air.
"Doesn't sound very convincing. Hmmm … how about I play more scared, would that ease your mindset?", he opens his mouth ridiculously wide and rolls his eyes back, the back of his right hand touching his forehead.
Phoebe balls her hands into fists. That's not how she imagined it. She wanted for him to beg for mercy, she thinks. She wants him to ….
"So, how about we start talking about the real thinks, that what's really on your mind?"
"What?"
"Oh yeah", he steps closer. Phoebe holds her ground, the time is over to be intimidated by him.
"You're not angry with me. Not really, I mean, I may be the starting point, but your real hate? That's not directed towards me", his voice is quieted, words flowing out of his mouth more easily. She's listening, why is she listening?"
"You're angry at the superhero community and at your parents. I mean, hell, so would I. First, they try to kill your brother, without any reasonably grounds and then they antagonise you. They try to take him and everything you achieved away from you. And then, once dear brother wakes up and instead of leaving him in your capable hands, they take him away. Because he can be saved, because he can be trusted. You can't, of course! You just took care of him for years and then they take him away from you", he sighs and shakes his head.
"It's so unfair, isn't it. All you wanted was your well deserved revenge on me and living peacefully with your brother, but did you? Oh no, of course you didn't. You are too dangerouse, too … evil", he smirks at her.
"To top it all, they wanted to kill you, you! And that even though they wouldn't even avenge you and your brother, what you had to go through. I would have hated them too", he stretches and wanders back to his corner. "Well, good luck with that. At least I won't have to watch them defeat you and take him away. Hey, maybe now that he helped you, they're going to kill him as well, wouldn't that be fun?"
"Shut up"; Phoebe hisses. She has no idea how she manages to stay this calm, though inside of her it's boiling. "Shut up, don't .. don't-"
"Don't what? Talk", he laughs. "Don't show you the truth, because this is what's going to happen, whether you want it or not. This is what's going to make these supposed super heroes famous".
She shakes her head, she needs to concentrate. She came in here with a purpose. With her fingers she raises the dagger again, lets it fly closer to the Destroyer and then … then she stops. Phoebe swallows, words ringin in her head and ears, demanding all of her attention span.
It's too much.
She lets the dagger come back to her, grips it in her hand and then walks out the door. She makes sure that the locks are in place before she loses control.
Her head is reeling. She has no idea what to think. His words, they made so much sense. Everything seemed to slot into place, just like he said and she hates it. Hates it, hates it.
Worse, she hates herself. She went into that room to get her revenge, because she deserves it. She deserves his pain, his death even. And then, when she is about to rid them, herself and Max of his existence, she doesn't do it. Because … because she thinks he can be useful. She's not quite sure that she is right, but oh god …
Phoebe swallows and closes her eyes, tries to think clearly, tries to make sense to everything that is going on here in her life right now. She doesn't even know what her guts are telling her. Se used to trust her own feeling, now it just seems to worsen everything.
Mechanically she makes herself a tea and watches the colour spread through the water, sitting at the small kitchen table. She needs to stop thinking … or start thinking.
Max stretches when he walks out of the small living room. The last four hours he spent looking at possible new, better lairs, which might not be found that easily. Something to hide where they are, because even if their temporary lair is nice, it won't do the trick. They need to find something safe.
He stops in the hall, when he hears a knocking against one of the doors, or more precicely, at the door where they keep the Destroyer in. He digs his fingernails into his palm. He knows that rhythm, knows it by heart and it makes him break out a cold sweat and his heart beating furiously.
He tries to calm his breathing, but fails. He still doesn't understand why he is still here, he should be dead, should be gone and out of their lifes. He himself should leave, with Phoebe, just go somewhere. He'll miss his family, but at least he'll know that they will be safe and so will he and Phoebe be.
He looks at the door again. As soon as he is gone, they need to get rid of him and then they will be fine. He knows it. With big steps he walks by the door and over to the kitchen. He sees his twin staring into a cup in front of her.
"Hey, you okay?", he asks her, sitting down next to her. Phoebe starts, moving the table in front of her and then looks over at him. Her eyes are dark, not quite the same. One of her eyes is darker, has been since- he shakes his head quickly.
"Are you okay?", he asks and Phoebe nods stiffly, gets up and takes her cup. She empties it into the sink. The tea bag flops down with a dull thud.
"Yeah", she answers, her back to him.
"Pheebs", she shakes her head at his words. "I'm … are you really okay?".
"I'm just thinking. Thinking of what we're going to do next so we can have an actual life".
Max frowns, watching her. This somehow doesn't seem right. He wants to just write it off as twin-intuition or maybe he just knows Phoebe better than he wants to admit to himself. "You don't have to do this on your own, we can do that together. It's our life now, we can-"
"No I just", she grates her teeth, her shoulders tense and her whole body basically screams restraint. "It's so much to think about, because … because", she hits the sink with her fist. The movement is quick and sudden. Max steps back, unsure all of a sudden. Phoebe hesitates before continuing. "Because I don't think we can live in a world like this. We have to do something, we have to show those who are against us, that they can't just play with us like they want to. We are not their puppets to move as they please. We are powerful and not afraid to fight back-"
"Phoebe, Phoebe, stop. What … what are you talking about? A fight? War?" Max stares at her, unsure on what to say. He had hoped they could avoid this. He had hoped they could just leave this country and live somewhere else. Yes, an ordinary life did sound boring but at the same time it was safe and with Phoebe that's what they needed. He knew after what she did, they wouldn't let her go, hell that's what these last days in the heroes quarters proved. A lot of them wanted her dead and those who didn't still wanted her rotting in a cell.
Phoebe made a dismissive sound, her body language changing into a more casual stance. "Tch", she made, before looking at him again. "I knew you wouldn't understand".
Confused, Max stepped backwards, staring at his sister. He didn't know what changed, but she seemed different, like someone turned a switch.
"You … why wouldn't I understand? I am here, just as you!"
"Because you are still sixteen", Phoebe shouts and Max stops in his tracks.
"What?"
"You heard me. Your body aged, but you didn't. How could you, you weren't conscious for the last few years, how could you have aged. You are still just a stupid boy, you need to see, really see all the pieces of the puzzle", her face is red and her brows are knitted and dark and it just hurts. It really hurts. So what is he? Just a little boy caught in the action with the big guys? Because, to be honest, it feels like yesterday when he and Phoebe faced The Destroyer for the very first time. Is that what he is now? A boy caught in the past?
And even if he is, he would have expected sympathy from Phoebe. He still has to get used to all of this, all these new developments he missed these past years. He's still adjusting, grabbing pieces of information wherever he can find them. To make up his own mind. He doesn't want to be left behind, he wants to fight with the big guys, on whichever side he decides to. He is not to be left in the dark and protected. He can do the protecting just as well.
Then again, her sudden outburst seems too sudden. And if her words hadn't made her this angry, he might have just ignored it. Might have thought about it how to calm her down, because the worst thing they could do was seperating. If they stopped trusting each other …
"So? Is that all I am? Your poor brother who needs to be locked away for his own good? I can fight all by myself. I don't need you to protect me, I just need you to understand, that I am capable of everything you are. Maybe I didn't age mentally but that doesn't mean I didn't suffer through the same things you did. Actually, I bet I can remember them better, because I am still sixteen." Max breathes heavily, eyes set on his sister who watches him with a blank expression.
"You've just proven to me, that you're nothing but that boy", she sneers. Phoebe shakes her head and turns around. "You are unable to understand it, there is so much more to-", he feels frustrated, his stomach churning angrily. Gosh, that's not his sister, he is sure of it. That is a delusional young woman who has been manipulated. And there is one more person here, that he is sure has the power to manipulate her the way he wants. He knew keeping him was too dangerous. He doesn't now what, but he is sure that the Destoryer is planning something, something bad no doubt and for some reason Phoebe starts to side with him and leaves him all alone.
He turns around, leaves, his hands balled tightly into fists. He can't let himself get angry at her. When he is gone, and if he has to dispose of him, that monster will go. And then, he hopes, he'll get his sister back.
Capter End
So, I really hope you enjoyed that chapter. I am always happy hearing your response and I love answering them! As always special thanks to everyone who bothers writing me a lovely review.
Guest: Désolée, mais ce histoire n'est pas de romance. Et désolée pour mon pauvre francais.
Britt: No, this is not going to be a thundercest story. All there is is sibling love.
starfire: Thank you so much. And sorry it took so long, but real life and writers block went in the way of my writing process. Also the story is already plotted out … mostly and sorry, but there will be no thundercest in this story.
Joog: Thank you so much. And well … you'll see if they know how to handle him.
Lucayathegood: As always I simply adore your reviews. There is so much I love and I keep smiling and giggling. And don't feel bad, I mean I haven't uploaded a chapter for like what? Almost a year … h gosh. It didn't seem that long.
Phia: Thank you so much. I am really glad you like the story so much. I hope you also continue reading :)
ThunderGirl: I'm really sorry, I think there is not much planned with Hank and Max. But I do agree, in the show it really is missing and … well now that I am thinking about it … I may be able to write something more with them, but you shouldn't get your hopes up too much.
Guest: I am definitely not abandoning this fic so … here have some more story.
: I really want to write more chapters, but stupid life and writers block was in the way. I will definitely complete this story, I actually have already the last two chapters written out, there are just a few chapters left which … yeah are in the middle.
: I'm glad you love it and well, here it continues :)
Strugberry: I can soothe your worries, I will definitely not abandon this fanfic. Even if it will take more years, which I hope will not be the case, I will definitely finish it. And yeah, it's almost been one year since I uploaded the last chapter but .. hey it's one more chapter … And wow .. masterpiece? *Blushes heavily*
The Elemental Angel: Well here you have your update, all fresh and .. I think the longest chapter sine ever. I'm glad you love it, I hope you continue to like it.
