Chapter 9
Sakari looked at Rong as he stood by the window, waiting impatiently for something. "Rong, it's late. Come on, get some sleep – it'll wait once it's arrived if you're not awake." Of course, she knew he was too stubborn to listen to her. He wanted to wait for the Messenger Hawk to arrive, no matter if that'd take several days or not. But he was in luck today: several seconds later, the bird arrived. "Why are you so impatient this time?" Sakari inquired. "Something important?"
"Just a feeling." He took the message from the bird and quickly read it. To her surprise, he almost cheered. "Yes! See, I knew some nice news would arrive! Here, I think you'll like this."
He handed her the letter, which she took with astonishment. "Eh… okay?" She first read the names of the senders: Yukon, Kaya and Yukon junior. It wasn't like the last one could write already, but it was the idea that counted. She then read the whole letter, and especially one passage really drew her attention to it.
'... and we're so happy! Kaya's given birth to our second child the other day. It's a girl, and a really wonderful little child. We've decided together we're calling her Sakari. We owe it to you. We owe you that Sakari will always be living in the Northern Water Tribe, even if it's another Sakari. Because really, it's the least we can do to thank you.'
She stared at the words, and she could hardly believe what they were telling her. Were they really that grateful to call their daughter after her? Grateful for what, anyway? It wasn't like she'd done much to help them, they'd done the most by themselves. But it moved her nonetheless.
"Told you, there is good news," Rong smiled, "well? Aren't you happy?"
"Yes…" She felt how tears ran down her cheeks, tears because she was so moved by this gesture.
Rong softly stroked them away with his finger and looked into her eyes. "Are these just tears of happiness or is there something else that causes them?"
She swallowed, worked up the courage to look deep inside her heart. There wasn't just happiness there because of this baby girl called after her. There was also sadness: it was like it was expressed in the letter. Yukon and Kaya's daughter was now the girl named Sakari in the Northern Water Tribe. It didn't feel like she was replaced, but it did hurt her to read about it. "There's something else," she thus confessed, "but I can't express it in words… so let's just say it's mere happiness, okay?"
He didn't seem too happy with that message, but he decided not to take this matter any further. "Alright then. Listen, before I forget – I received another letter the other day. The new school year is about to get started, and since Sakka and Xia are almost five years old now…"
"I get it. What's it like?" That was her first concern. She wanted to know what place she was sending her girls to before she was willing to let them go. Sakka and Xia were precious to her. Sakka stuck around with her mother a lot while Xia was more attached to her father, like it'd been from the very beginning. But Xia also talked to her mother now, and Sakka seemed a bit timid to connect to her father, but she tried to at least. Eventually, the twins seemed to appreciate both of their parents equally much.
Their whole little family was now getting used to living in the Fire Nation. Rong had gained a job. After being rejected for the navy and army because of his back and 'traumatic experiences', he'd gotten a job quite similar to the one he'd had in the Water Tribe. He made pottery and all sorts of other supplies for daily life. Sakari in the mean while had become a stay-at-home mother: not because it was her wish, but simply because it'd turned out to be that way. She actually liked being able to take care of the girls this much, but it also meant she hardly made contacts with the people outside. And that part didn't really make her happy.
"Fire Nation schools? Basically a lot of propaganda," Rong answered her question. "But we are there to help them to see the war in another perspective. I managed to teach myself to do that, so the twins must be able to do it as well, most certainly if we help them. It's not that bad, really."
"Okay… so, when do we need to register them?"
"This week. Both of the parents need to be present during the registration."
"Okay…" She fell backwards on the bed and closed her eyes. So one day this week, she'd come in contact with other people, who truly belonged in the Fire Nation. Oh, alright – she could deal with that, right?
Registering the twins wasn't half that bad as she'd suspected. No questions were asked about their roots of origin, and they didn't even receive inquiring looks after mentioning their names. Sakka and Xia in the mean while had become very excited about the idea of going to school, and luckily for them, school would start the next week. Sakari couldn't help wondering what that was going to be like, all day long without the children around. Her chores would be done rather quickly if there were no twins to keep her busy, so she'd probably be left with time to kill – for the first time in a long, long time, so one could say. Maybe she could practise her calligraphy? She'd always wanted to improve in that, but now she'd finally have the chance.
But that chance was gone pretty quickly when Sakari went to school to pick the twins up after their first day.
"Picking up the kids from school?"
She looked up in surprise: a woman, several years older than she was, had spoken to her. It was a first someone spoke in a normal tone to her, especially for a woman. Most Fire Nation ladies hadn't spoken to her directly when she'd passed them on her way. "First day," she answered, "for both of them. They're twins, you see? Two little girls."
"How adorable," the woman smiled. "My boy's an only child, unfortunately. It's not exactly his first day today, but I want to pick him up anyway."
"How old is he, then?" she couldn't help asking.
"Eight years," the woman replied. "Why don't you wait around for a while after your girls are out of the building? Then my boy will come and you can meet him."
"Oh, I'd love it," she beamed. This woman was genuinely nice to her, not nice like in 'hi, I treat you nicely but I hope you'll leave soon' like she was used to be treated like. And before she realized it, she slipped those words. "This is the first time a woman here talks in a normal voice to me! I, eh, I'm from the colonies," she hurried to say.
The woman nodded pensively. "I thought so already. The first thing, I mean," she added to Sakari's surprise. "I mean – you're young and still youthful as well, which makes you a natural beauty. I bet most women around here are just afraid their husbands find you more attractive than their wives." She grinned now, a bit bitterly. "No reason for me to feel jealous of you, though."
"Your husband truly loves you," Sakari smiled, though that smile wasn't returned.
"No, he's dead," the woman simply said.
The words struck her like lightning. "Oh, I'm sorry, so incredibly sorry!"
"Never mind. It's been eight years already," the woman carelessly said. "He died during one of the fights in the Northern Water Tribe. One of the very few deaths on our side – I don't dare to think about the victims that must have fallen on the Tribe's side."
Sakari felt how she became nauseous, but she tried to remain calm nonetheless. "So you're against the war?"
"I've always been, even before it took away my husband's life," the woman sighed. "He hated it too, but as a skilled firebender, he was forced to join the army and fight."
The story sounded awkwardly familiar to Sakari, but if she'd talk now, she'd give everything away. And thus, she decided she'd keep her mouth shut.
The woman hardly seemed to notice, as she was now in the vein of talking. "I don't understand it – for as far as I ever paid attention in class, all I know is that our great Fire Lord Sozin suddenly decided he wanted the Fire Nation to rule the world. The selfish git!"
Sakari couldn't help sniggering, and she was actually relieved by those words. So it didn't really matter her knowledge of the Fire Nation's history wasn't that wide – this Fire Nation woman didn't know much about it, either.
"Ah, there are the first-years! Where are those twins of yours?"
Sakari turned to the gate, but she couldn't find them in the mass at first. Then, Xia suddenly ran towards her and grabbed both of her hands.
"Mummy, school is fun!" she cheered. "But now, I want to go home. I'm tired…"
"As soon as we've find your sister," Sakari smiled. "Where is she?"
"With someone older," Xia carelessly said. "She made friends already."
"Friends? With whom?"
At that moment, the woman next to her pointed at the gate again. "With my boy, perhaps? It's the first time I've seen him holding hands with someone."
And indeed – the boy she was pointing at was holding her other daughter's hand. Sakari couldn't help herself but smile. "It's a nice boy by the look of it," she kindly remarked, "what's his name?"
"Sho. I called him after his father, Shoji," she said. "As a way to honour the memory of him, I suppose. He died before his son was even born."
"I'm sorry…" To honour the memory… Maybe that was why Yukon and Kaya had called their second child after her. That'd be a nice way to think about it, nicer than just 'there's now another Sakari in the Tribe'.
"Ah well," the woman interrupted her thoughts. "It's been eight years, so I should just get over it, right?"
"No," she spoke from experience. "No, you'll never completely get over it if you lose someone you love, whether it's to death or to something else. Not in a lifetime."
The woman looked at her, completely taken by surprise. "You're the first one who puts it that way," she whispered, moved as she was. "You're most certainly a rare one, but I like you… What's your name?"
"Sakari."
"Mine's Mei Li," the woman smiled as they shook hands. "Sakari, eh? Sounds foreign."
"It is," she confessed, followed by the cover story they'd made up a long time ago. "My mother was partial to names that sounded a bit exotic; it's as simple as that. And I inherited that treat, didn't I, Xia?"
"Yes! My sister's name is Sakka," Xia told Mei Li with a bright smile. From timid, she'd become very vivid, unlike her shy sister. It was therefore only more surprising that it was Sakka, and not Xia, who was holding hands with Sho. They'd now approached Sakari closely enough to be audible without having to shout, and Sho now let go of her hand.
"She was a bit scared to go out alone and her sister had already left," he calmly explained. "So I held her hand."
"That's very nice of you, Sho," Sakari smiled, embracing her second daughter. Sakka seemed relieved as familiar arms were wrapped around her, and she closed her eyes happily. "Listen, Sho – I've just been talking to your mother while we were waiting for you two, and I'd really like it if you two would come over to my home. Would you like that? Both of you?"
Mei Li looked up in surprise again, but there was a smile on her face. "We'd love to, wouldn't we, Sho?"
Rong was concentrated on his work. It wasn't his dream job to make pottery, but then again, what was? He liked doing statistic work, but he refused to work in benefit of the war. And with that, he'd ruled out all of his options, because the only statistics he could do were concerning the war. No, he was happy enough he was rejected for the army or the navy, and he was certainly not going to meddle himself into war affairs voluntarily, not at any rate.
Failing the tests he'd had to go through hadn't even been that easy. They wanted as many firebenders as they could get, and Rong wasn't one of the worst benders around, unfortunately for him. But he'd shown his back and told the story: that he'd barely survived a 'friendly' fire attack, that it still was enormously painful and that he was suffering nightmares and other physical 'damage'. Only the first thing was true, but he'd managed to pretend he was in pain enough to be rejected. He'd had to hold himself back not to cheer.
A bell rang: there was a customer. That wasn't part of his job – he made the supplies, his boss sold them. He'd only take over the selling part if his boss was away, delivering or something like that. Wait a minute – hadn't he just left to deliver something? Rong now quickly left his pottery for what it was, washed his hands and rushed from the room in the back where he was working to the actual shop itself.
The customer was a man, slightly older than Rong, and he was just looking around for a bit.
"The owner is gone for a delivery," he formally remarked. "So I'm replacing him for now. How can I help you?"
The man now looked up, and almost immediately, he gave Rong an astounded and puzzled look. "Rong?!"
He could only stare back at him, and now, he recognized the other one as well. The one who'd helped him with his letter, who'd helped him to get a life boat – the only one in the navy he'd ever considered a friend. "Jian?!"
"Man, talking about coincidence," his friend grinned. "I hardly ever come in this store! But what are you doing here? Weren't you supposed to be dead?"
"It's a long story," Rong sighed, "and it's not the nicest one, either. But I could ask you the same question – I thought you lived elsewhere?"
"I moved," Jian simply shrugged.
Rong now noticed something about him – his right arm didn't move as he shrugged. Actually, he didn't even see it – the sleeve just hung there, and there was no hand sticking out of it. "What happened to your…"
"Blown off. Earthbenders," Jian carelessly remarked. "I got hit by a boulder, and my arm got crushed. There wasn't much to save, so I had it amputated."
It was merely the thought that made Rong a bit nauseous already, and he didn't dare to ask more about it. He wanted to show his sympathies, but this subject would probably be too painful to talk about. And thus, he remained silent.
"Quite a conversation killer, an injury like that, eh?" Jian now grinned. "Don't worry, I got used to being able to only use my left hand, it's been quite some years. Plus, it was the perfect way to get out of the war, so you won't hear me complaining about it. But really, I'm more interested in your stay. What brought you back here? Weren't you with…"
"I still am," Rong quickly interrupted him, before he could say something like 'some waterbending girl'. One could never know who might be listening. "Some things didn't go as we planned, so we moved to here with the girls."
"The girls?" Jian inquired, completely surprised. "Excuse me? How many girls did you hit on exactly?"
"I meant our daughters," Rong grinned, holding back a laugh because of the misunderstanding. "We're parents of twins, two girls."
"Ah, alright," Jian smiled, a bit embarrassed by his own mistake. "Children, eh…"
"Do you have any?" Rong couldn't resist asking. He was curious to his friend's life, after being so convinced they'd never meet again.
Jian looked up after that question and gave him a gloomy look all of a sudden. "You and I need to talk someday," was all he said. "Then we can discuss things like that. I don't have much time today, but what about tomorrow?"
Rong nodded, and they made an appointment right away. He hadn't had much time to socialize ever since they'd arrived in the Fire Nation, and it was time to change that. This was a good start.
As he arrived at home that afternoon, he was surprised to see five instead of three people sitting on the couch in the living room. He was even more surprised as he recognized the face of the unknown woman sitting next to his wife.
"There's my husband!" Sakari cheered, once she'd noticed he'd entered. "Mei Li, Sho – this is Rong. Rong, I invited Mei Li and her son over, they're… what's the matter?"
He didn't want to talk about what the matter was, as he knew this would be far too painful to discuss.
"Rong?"
He barely heard Sakari worried voice as the memories came back to him. When was it when he was shown that portrait? It had been several days before their arrival in the Northern Water Tribe, only a couple of days before he…
"Rong!" Sakari now shouted. "You're dozing off here and I want to know why! Hey, hello?! What's up?"
"I know her face," he now finally muttered. "I'm sorry, it's… not a nice memory." He knew that probably sounded slightly ambiguously, but he couldn't help it. It was the truth, after all.
"I have never seen him before," Mei Li quickly said. "I really don't…"
"I've only seen your portrait," he now sighed, still reluctant to tell the whole story. "Your husband showed it to me, several days before he… well… He was so enthusiastic about being married to you and becoming a father in the near future…" He'd said it now, but it was hard on him already – he didn't want think about how hard it'd be on Mei Li. It wasn't like he'd known her husband personally, but it'd certainly struck him as he'd found out someone so full of life had died only a couple of days later. It had made him aware of how much luck he'd had to still be alive.
To his surprise, however, Mei Li didn't cry or responded in any sad way. The opposite: she gave him a smile. "I'm glad," she now whispered, "I'm glad that he was so happy about it. Were you friends with him?"
He now shook his head. "No, but he showed more or less everyone on the ship your portrait," he now said, truthfully. "He was so excited about it, he… you two had only gotten married weeks before he had to go, hadn't you?" he suddenly remembered. Of course, that was why her husband had been so exuberant – it had all been so new to him, and he couldn't even be with her. It was only logical he wanted everyone to know and be happy with him. That was the next best thing if you couldn't be together.
"Two months," Mei Li nodded. "I found out I was pregnant the day before he had to leave…" She was spontaneously embraced by Sakari, but she didn't seem to need comfort. Was she already over it, or was she too happy about the fact her husband had been so merry until his last day?
Her son just sat there, in between Rong's own children. He resembled his mother in any way when it came to appearance – of course, he couldn't judge his character. Had he missed his father as he'd grown up until the point he'd reached now? Why was he actually so concerned about the wife and son to someone he didn't even remember the name of? He had no idea. Maybe it was because he could relate to their story. Maybe because it gave him chills: what had happened to them, could have also happened to him and Sakari. Yes, things were put into perspective again. He shouldn't take everything for granted.
"I feel so sorry for Mei Li," Sakari said, as she was sitting up straight in bed. They were early in getting to bed that night, but that was mostly because Rong had to get up early the next morning to prepare a big delivery.
"She seemed to feel alright," Rong responded from the bathroom, washing his face. That was a shallow comment, and he knew it. He didn't know why he was acting like that – probably sleep was catching up with him.
"But she wasn't. Didn't you see how she held Sho when they left? As if she was afraid to lose him. And I bet she is – afraid, I mean. She already lost his father!"
"Can't we talk about something else?" he sighed, entering the bedroom now. He really didn't want to discuss this topic, as he knew what it would lead to. Either to him remembering the things he was so desperately trying to forget, or to both of them feeling uncomfortable because Mei Li's fate could have been their own. He didn't want to take either of those roads.
"Fine. You come up with a subject, then." She was upset with him, but she did her best not to show it.
"A friend of mine will come over tomorrow," he now said. He'd completely forgotten to tell today, as Mei Li had suddenly popped up in their house.
"Do I know him?"
"How many of my friends do you know? You hardly come out of the house!" He'd said it before he'd realized it, and he immediately regretted the words. But it was true – it bothered him to no end she didn't seem to have a problem with being a stay-at-home mum.
"You talk about them," Sakari snapped at him, grabbing a piece of paper, ink and a brush. She obviously didn't care she spilled some ink on the bed as she began to write with fierce strokes. "Big chance I remember them from your descriptions. Talk, then! I'll listen, I'm just writing a letter to my own friends."
She was angry, and not just a bit. He'd hurt her by saying it in a voice like he'd done, and he knew it. Should he say something about it? No, better if he didn't. "His name is Jian, I think I mentioned him before. He's the one who helped me getting a life boat."
"Oh, that same friend that copied that letter for you?" Sakari scoffed. "That letter that told you were dead? Such great friends you run into, I have to say!"
He deeply sighed as he stepped into bed. This didn't promise much good for the next day: they had to talk this out, now. "Sakari, you're mad at me, right?"
"It really takes a genius to figure that out, doesn't it?"
He'd never experienced her this sarcastic before. "Why are you so angry?" he calmly inquired.
"It's not just one reason," Sakari groaned, signing the letter – which was too short to be an actual letter – and putting the stuff aside. He now had her full attention. "You just go around and meet your friends, while I… Y'know that I'm still writing to the Tribe as if I'm just on a long holiday? I'm still convinced I can come back whenever I please to, even though I know it's not true! But you don't understand, of course not. You can't see why I miss Pon-pon so much, or why I always allowed Yukon to embrace me, even though I've made it clear I don't think about him in a romantic way. I thought you could understand, but…"
She was silent for so long, that he started quenching the candles just to have something to do during the awkward silence.
"Good night," she muttered. She turned away from him as she lied down.
"Good night…" He made an attempt to embrace her, but she acted so coldly that he gave up eventually.
He had almost fallen asleep as she suddenly whispered: "Rong… do you think love is enough for a marriage to sustain?"
He didn't respond to that, mainly because he didn't know the answer. But he was sure of one thing. There was more than love between the two of them, in despite of their little quarrel just now. What they had went deeper than true love, if that was even possible. Even if the answer to her question was 'no', it still wouldn't be the end of their marriage. The strong bond between the two of them would hold, no matter what.
With those thoughts in his mind, he crept closer against her and fell asleep almost immediately.
Author's Notes: sorry for Sakari's still not-so-happy mood. I'm listening happy songs now, so mostly, that means my characters become happier too.
Anyway! In case you wondered where I got the names from - Shoji was mentioned in The Headband, so I used it and also made Sho out of it. Mei Li is based off Meiling in Card Captor Sakura. Not qua appearance or whatsoever (not intentionally anyway), but just because I like her name. Jian is a name I saw in a review of a book by a Chinese woman (Lulu Wang I believe it was).
And yes, Yukon and Kaya have two kids now - Yukon Jr. and Sakari. Wow, they're SO original in naming their kids... Kaya's behind it mostly, of course.
Thank you for reading! And if you're going to comment - thanks in advance! I love to read what people think of my stories!
