Disclaimer: I own nothing.


Part V

"Memoria, memoria..."

Come As You Are - Nirvana

December 16, 2012 – Manhattan, New York – Stark Tower

It turned out that she needed surgery. Since the nerve wasn't completely healing on its own, her body kept trying to heal around it and, much to her dismay, her body was doing more harm than good.

A week after the 'bot incident, she agreed for Dr. Banner to knock her out and fix her up. It took another week for her to be up and about, but everything was fine. Her body was able to heal without hindrance and Steve had begun sleeping in her bed because he wanted to, not because he had to help her pee every several hours.

It also meant that she could start trying to initiate sexy times since the blond had eased her off nearly every time things went a little too far.

But she got the all clear from the good doc and her hormones were a mess after sleeping next to the perfection that was Steve Rogers for too long with too little. She planned on rocking his world.

She was still concerned when it came to James. When was he coming? What was he even doing? He said he had to make it safe. Did that mean he knew what happened to her? The same thing must have happened to him. He looked the same, acted nearly the same. He might know something she didn't.

"Can you not think about sex right now, please? Pepper's in Tokyo and if I'm not getting any, neither are you."

Darcy groaned and flipped him the bird. "Shut your face hole, dude."

"Ah, sexual frustration. I hear you."

"I really don't want to have this conversation with you."

"Then stop making that face!"

She glared at him. "It's my face."

"Sinfully sexy. Got it."

Darcy sighed and picked up Pi. "I'm going to sleep – "

"It's noon!"

"I'm an adult," she protested, Pi beeping in agreement. Bless her daughter. "And I can sleep whenever I want."

Tony glanced at her. "But why sleep when you can create?"

"Because all work and no play makes Darcy a dull girl."

"Get out of here, Lewis."

She gave him a two finger salute and disappeared into the elevator.


December 24, 2012 – Manhattan, New York – Stark Tower

Expensive lingerie? Check.

Ruby red lipstick? Check.

Heels that she almost killed herself walking in? Check.

Now, all she had to do was wait for Steve to walk through the door of his – read: their – apartment so she could wow him. He was due back from Washington after being wrangled into settling a political debate by Fury. She had told him not to go, but his country was too important for him to ignore.

Hours passed, but Steve didn't show.

She had fallen asleep on the couch and woke up to the sunlight streaming through the window and Pi beeping in the kitchen. With a smile on her face, she got up and slowly made her way to the sound, sure that Steve had shown up and just hadn't wanted to wake her. But Pi was alone.

"Jay, did Steve come home last night?"

"I apologize, Lou. Captain Rogers was called away for a mission with Mr. Wilson and Agent Romanoff."

Her brows creased together and she scooped Pi off the floor. "What kind of mission?"

"There was a recon mission – "

"For what? All Avengers are accounted for – "

"I am not at the liberty to say."

What the fuck? "I have the highest clearance – "

"Captain Rogers has initiated privacy protocols. They can only be overridden – "

"TONY!"


"Sorry, short stack, if Cap locked it down, it would take me and Pepper to override them."

Darcy growled in frustration. What good was creating an AI if you couldn't override it? Steve was purposely shutting her out. Leaving her in the dark.

"And Pep won't go for that," he continued, handing Pi a wrench to hold. "She's a real stickler for personal space."

The brunette looked up at the ceiling. "All right, Jay. What's it going to take to get you to crack?"

"I do apologize, Lou, however my protocols – "

"That's General to you." Oh, yeah. She would pull out the big guns if it meant getting what she wanted.

There was a stilted silence before the AI stiffly said, "My apologies, General Lewis. However, as I have previously stated, there is no way for me to reveal Captain Rogers mission or location until he lifts his protocols."

"I really didn't want to do this, Jay. I thought we were friends."

"General Lewis?"

Darcy sighed in regret. "I'm going to hack you. It's going to hurt. And I'm not gonna stop until I find Steve."

"General Lewis, I can assure you – "

"You're not seriously going to hack my AI, are you?" Tony asked, slightly bewildered at the determination he saw in her gaze. "His firewalls have firewalls."

She shrugged. "I'll do what I have to do to find him. He doesn't go dark without good reason and he always tells me. Something's up. I'm gonna find out what." She glanced at the ceiling. "May the best man win, dude."


December 25, 2012 – Manhattan, New York – Stark Tower

James Buchanan Barnes.

A blast from the past that made sense and confused her all at once.

It made sense in the way that he had been Steve's best friend since they were both young. Nearly inseparable on and off the battlefield. Until he fell from the train and was declared Killed in Action.

However, it confused her in the way that he was the man she had agreed to marry when she was eighteen years old. That he, the love of her life, was born decades before her and hadn't aged a bit. Just like her.

In the end, JARVIS had fought tooth and nail to preserve Steve's privacy blocks, but he was no match for the way she took him apart to the bare circuits before building him back up again. No doubt he would be salty when he finished rebooting. Tony had watched everything avidly, seeing where his security measures had failed and making notes on how to improve them.

"That's the guy?" The billionaire asked tactlessly. "The one – you know."

Darcy rolled her eyes as she tracked the path Steve was taking. "Yup. Defiled little eighteen-year-old me. Even agreed to marry the lying bastard."

"Is it really considered lying if he doesn't remember?"

She sighed. "We can't…I can't give myself that hope, Tony. He's the one that shot me out of the sky in Bucharest. Patched me up, too." She swallowed hard and looked down, unable to meet his gaze. "He said he would come back when he was ready. If Steve went after him before that, it could end badly."

"He's the one that told you about HYDRA."

It wasn't a question, yet she still cringed under his scrutiny. Steve had gracefully glossed over the time period that had caused her injury and Tony seemed determined to ignore that it happened because it meant that he failed. The only thing she had offered was HYDRA and SHIELD had been buzzing ever since.

She just happened to leave James out of it all together.

"He wasn't an essential part of the story," she said. Sensing her mother's discomfort, Pi beeped next to her and the brunette scooped the little bot up. "He plans on coming back on his own terms."

He glared at her. "You're leaving, aren't you?"

"I have to!"

"No, you really fucking don't. You were shot out of the goddamn sky last time."

Darcy shrugged. "Then he should know what plane not to shoot this time around."

"I'll call Fury."

"Do it. I already did. He gave me permission for backup, but I prefer solo."

The billionaire huffed. He hated being outsmarted. "I'll stay on the coms with JARVIS."

"You know he won't want to help me after I hacked him. I betrayed his trust, Tony. Hell, he might make Pi turn against me."

The bot made an indignant whirring sound at the suggestion.

"You're going in blind."

He wasn't exactly wrong. She knew nothing of the op – whether it had an alternate mission or not. All she had was a hit on Steve's tracker that told her where he was headed. Darcy couldn't let him go in when it could end so badly.

"I'll be on the coms," he repeated. "I'll talk Romanoff down if it goes sideways. Wilson doesn't listen to me for shit, but I'm hoping Cap will listen to you."


Somewhere in Bucharest

"This is the stupidest idea you've ever had."

A crash sounded above them and Sam crouched further behind an overturned desk.

"I didn't really have a plan," Steve bit out. "It was more spur of the moment after he tried to kill me."

"Your…girlfriend has been trying to find you. Tony's been helping," Natasha said, her nose wrinkling delicately at the thought. "JARVIS was down for hours and just came back up. She's initiated complete blackout protocols."

Steve stopped barricading the door – really, what was he thinking dropping them in the middle of a damn HYDRA base? – and looked at her. "You don't think…you don't think she's going to come here, do you?"

The office window exploded behind them and Sam fired his gun blindly before yelling, "If I die here, I'm going to kill you, Rogers!"

"On your left!"


Somewhere over Bucharest

"I swear to god, if you go down again…" Tony's voice threatened over her radio.

There had been some turbulence, but nothing she couldn't handle. Especially since Tony had decided that her bird needed some Stark upgrades.

"Have you been able to reach Steve?"

"Their coms are down. JARVIS can't get them either. I really hope you're right about this, Lou."

"Maybe I should have had you make me a suit," she smirked, checking the coordinates one last time.

He growled, "Don't tempt me."

Darcy was able to see the base below. It was older than the one she had been held at. It looked like it was a front for a factory, but, according to Steve, it was really a HYDRA facility. Sneaky bastards.

"So, dive in, guns blazing?" She suggested somewhat seriously. The idea had merit.

"I fucking swear, Lewis – "

"Too late!"


The base was deathly quiet. Maybe because there were bodies littered everywhere or maybe it was because Darcy was holding her breath; she wasn't sure.

Almost all the bodies leading into the factory had a clean shot through their foreheads. A sniper, her brain supplied. When the bodies ran out, it was clear that hand to hand combat took places, the victor literally wiping the floor with their opponents.

It was too messy to be Steve's team or SHIELD. Too organized to be military. It was…methodical. Each target was taken out purposefully, with minimal fanfare. It didn't make sense.

She knew what James was capable of after being on the business end of one of his episodes, but she still wasn't sure if that qualified him for such brutality.

He shot you out of the sky, dumbass.

Everyone had their moments.

"Bucky, please."

Darcy glued herseld to the wall at the sound of Steve's pleading. Her gun felt familiar in her hand, her breathing even. Could she shoot him if she had to? In theory, she would like to think that she would. But maybe it would be easier to zap him. That had been an interesting memory to get back.

But it wasn't the time or the place to dwell on what she had done to Yon-Rogg. Shit, that was literally a lifetime ago.

"I'm not who you remember anymore," James said. His voice held much more than a hint of sadness, but she was relieved that he at least seemed to know who the blond was. "I'm not who Darce remembers, either."

"What does Darcy have to do with anything?"

"She didn't tell you?"

Well, it was now or never.

"I didn't know," Darcy said. It had been a true feat to put one foot in front of the other to stand in front of the both of them. A quick scan of the ransacked office told her that Sam and the Widow had been knocked out, either by James' hand or the enemy's. "I didn't find out until a few hours ago."

"Darcy, get back – "

"He won't hurt me, Steve." She was so sure in that, that James seemed to relax slightly. "He's my Peggy."

The blond looked between them in confusion. His mouth opened and closed a few times before he just shook his head. "I don't understand."

"Me neither, punk. Best to just go with it."


January 29, 2013 – Manhattan, New York – Stark Tower

Things were weird.

Normally, she would hide from any sort of confrontations in her hangar. And this time was proving to be no different. Old habits died hard, okay?

Darcy Lewis could be classified as a coward for that reason alone. Especially when the two men she adored more than anything were trying to sort through their own messy relationship. A relationship that was decidedly…boy/boy.

And, Christ, had that nearly revved her engine so hard that she attacked them both with her mouth. And hands. And lady parts.

But Tony had aided her in hiding. By the time she flew back into US territory, the billionaire had a simple apartment built in the hangar so she didn't have to leave if she didn't want to. And it even came with a fully stocked kitchen. If he wasn't so gone on Pepper, she would've considered adding him to her harem. Her decidedly empty harem.

It had been a month since James had decided to go home with them. A month since Darcy had fled and allowed them to work out their own issues. That also mean it had been a month of nightmares.

Pi had kept her company when she couldn't sleep anymore. JARVIS was still angry with her – rightfully so – but it made it harder to avoid Tony when he needed avoiding. Namely after a particularly bad night.

So, there she was, a month later, functioning on little to no sleep and a frightening amount of coffee.

The circles under her eyes looked more like bruises at that point, but she refused to think too much about it. She lost weight, but that was a given considering her lack of sleep and, well, food.

Darcy really just wanted Steve and James to work everything out because, technically, James was Steve's first. The blond had laid claim on her love decades before she was even born. It would be like breaking up the Beatles if she got between them. And, contrary to popular belief, she wasn't a home-wrecker. Or rather, a tower-wrecker.

Once her boys were settled, she could try to make nice. Maybe be their friend or some other garbage that would leave her heartbroken.

"General Lewis?"

The brunette startled so hard that she flung her mug of coffee off the lab table. With a low curse, she realized it was just JARVIS.

JARVIS.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She babbled, trying to make amends. "I didn't mean to ruin our friendship, but I had to choice! It was – "

"General Lewis, if you would please follow the blinking lights to the panic room – "

"Panic room? What's happening?"

"General Lewis, if you will – "

Darcy threw up her hands. "Jay, c'mon, what's – "

"Lou. Please."

Dimly, she thought that she had never heard him beg. But that was right before something hit her in the back of the head and her world swam into nothingness.


"Sir, there has been a perimeter breach in the hangar."

The AI caught the attention of all three men in the lab. Tony was the first to articulate a response as he flipped up his welding mask. "Lock down the tower. Do we have eyes on them? Where's Darcy?"

The month had been absolute hell for Steve. As soon as the quinjet and Darcy's plane had landed at Stark Tower, the brunette was locked away in the hangar. He had been forced to deal with Bucky – James – as if he were a naughty child with amnesia.

"No, Buck, President Kennedy was assassinated before the Vietnam war."

"She doesn't hate you, she just wants us to work through our stuff."

"Of course I remember! I was only half-drunk when you decided to tell me that you loved me and wanted to – y'know."

He figured, what with the modern outlook and all, that it wasn't really a big deal if Captain America turned out to be bisexual. Hell, Steve Rogers had been bisexual since 1932 when he saw Bucky without a shirt for the first time. Being a queer teenager was hard in Brooklyn. The sex that followed was far and few in between, only occurring when the brunet had a dry spell and still needed…something.

So, while they were busy putting Bucky's memories back in order and ensuring that all the HYDRA was flushed out, Darcy kept herself locked away and it only served to confuse him more. He had real feelings for Darcy. The kind that made him want to, well, marry her.

It would be a pipedream to have the both of them wrapped around him in the middle of the night. Even if that meant sharing nightmares and the like, seeing as Darcy had a hell of a left hook and Bucky could have him pinned in seconds. It was a goal that he wanted to work towards since Bucky had started documenting everything that HYDRA had done to him since the fall, including the time that overlapped with Darcy. The time that was the gaps in her memory. And certain trigger words had to be defused before he could do anything too important.

Those two weeks had been absolute hell for Bucky's PTSD.

And now something was happening in the hangar and he wasn't there to stop it.

"General Lewis is – I'm sorry, I seem to have lost connection."

Steve was out of the uncomfortable chair that he occupied when Tony insisted on looking at Bucky's arm in an instant, intent on heading to the hangar. A hand on his arm stopped him and he had to contain the snarl when he turned around. "What?"

Bucky's blue eyes were staring back at him, a hint of gray clouding them. "If it's HYDRA, we need to know."

"He's right. JARVIS, get SHIELD on the line. Robo-Cop, head towards the hangar."

"You told me what they did to her," Steve said quietly. That had not been a conversation he wanted to have. Especially since he would have to have it again with her present. What they did to the people he loved…well, he understood why Bucky wanted to burn them to the ground. "They can't have her again. They can't hurt her again."

Bucky clenched his jaw, but nodded anyway. His arm whirred dangerously as he looked over his shoulder at Tony, gruffly asking, "You comin', Stark?"

"JARVIS, get a suit ready. And activate Darcy's tracker."

"At once, Sir."


February 2, 2013 – Unknown Location

This wasn't happening.

Darcy was really tired of waking up in random places. Random gross places. By a rule of thumb, if the place only had one window, a metal door, and a dirty mattress, it wasn't a good place. Maybe she was too spoiled by Tony's luxury, but she definitely did not want to touch the cement floors. Even with shoes on.

It was familiar somehow and Darcy knew she couldn't be the damsel in distress while she waited for someone to find her. Maybe she could zap them. But that meant she had to touch them. Ew.

Chancing a glance down, she realized, thankfully, she was in her beat up mechanic suit. More coverage.

Focusing on pulling the tingling sensation into her hands, she saw her fingertips begin to spark lightly. She could do this. She would survive.

And then go back to the tower and kiss the daylights out of her boys.

Zap, zap, motherfuckers.


February 6, 2013 – Manhattan, New York – Stark Tower

Steve was getting restless.

When Bucky had narrowed down Darcy's location and cross-referenced it with known HYDRA bases, he had come up with a ramshackle house in Seattle. A house that was filled with unconscious men.

"It's only been a day!" Tony had exploded in a whisper, toeing one of the bodies gingerly. "Where did she go?"

Steve had sighed with a shake of his head while Bucky had smirked. Noting his friend's mood, the blond asked, "What's the grin for?"

"You wouldn't believe how smart she is."

Giving a last glance around the small house, he said, "I'm beginning to get an idea."

After they found her tracker, the trail went cold. It was concerning because no one knew if she left of her own volition or if she was trapped somewhere else. The men in the Seattle house has said she had electrocuted them – with her hands? – and didn't know where she went. Which sounded promising.

"I told you we had history," Bucky said, glancing sideways at the blond worrying his nails to the quick.

Steve nodded absently. "Yeah. Well, me and her, too."

It wasn't a contest and neither man wanted to step on the other's toes. They both wanted her, together, but they were unaware that they shared that desire. Unaware that it would be welcome. Both men were engrained so deeply in the other that they needed to be together.

"I don't want to take her from you. I want us…I want us to be together."

Well, there was no use beating around the bush.

Steve blinked. "You want…"

"I want. And I know where she's headed."


February 8, 2013 – Near the Mojave Desert, California – Pancho's Bar

It was empty and dusty and exactly what she remembered. The trek down had been longer than she would have liked – her zappy hands could jumpstart a car, thank god – and involved a few 'borrowed' cars along the way.

No phone, no bracelet. It was like she had been cut off from the world. On the bright side, she was able to spend more time in her mind. More time with the memories that plagued her.

Including the missing time.

The chair. Alexander Pierce. Project PEGASUS.

He had wanted her to talk, spill the beans about everything Dr. Lawson had worked on, but she couldn't. She refused. And she was beaten bloody, her brain wiped repeatedly for compliance. Hell, she was sent out on mission for them. She killed people. Innocent people because she was ordered to.

And, in the end, she had destroyed him.

"I command you to stop!"

Darcy looked down at the small blade in her hand. Was she ever trained in using it? By the way she had picked it up without a thought and brandished it like an actual weapon, she figured she had to have been taught at one point.

Tracking down Pierce had been somewhat easy. Infiltrating his security had been harder, but she managed. It was a mere hour before she had him tied to a chair in a hotel room that just so happened to be on the west coast as she was – really, what were the chances that he was overseeing the opening of a new government building?

"You don't get to command me to do anything," she whispered loud enough for him to hear. "You don't own me."

There was more yelling, more talking, just more.

And Darcy slid her blade across his throat and relished in the gurgles and the lifeless slump his body.

It was her turn to protect her family. Her turn to protect James after all he had done for her.

She had survived because of him. He had them wipe her before questioning her so she would be safe. The core protected her, enabled her healing so she didn't become a vegetable. A blessing that kept her mind said and allowed her to electrocute people, a curse that kept her physically unmoving despite the years that had passed.

It allowed her to be with Steve and James for as long as their luck held out. A true blessing.

"Oh, make me over. I'm all I wanna be…"

She smiled at the song playing on the jukebox in the corner of the dimly lit bar. It was odd that it was empty in the evening, but she wasn't about to complain about her good luck.

Of course, that was when the door opened and closed behind her.

"Been lookin' for you."

Darcy turned her head, a small smile gracing her features when she saw her boys hovering near the entrance. "Took you long enough," she snarked back. "Been waiting."

Steve looked around the bar curiously, noting all the military memorabilia coating the walls. "Seems nice," he offered with his hands in his pockets. "We missed you."

Her blue eyes found the brunet's. "This is where we met."

"Why do you think I'm here, baby?"

She had two sets of arms wrapped around her before the first tear even had a hope of falling.

"We're not going anywhere, honey," Steve whispered against the crown of her head. "You're stuck with two old men that love you to death."

Darcy smiled. Maybe it was all worth it.

Maybe this was where she was meant to be.

This time, this place.


Let me know what you think!

~Grace