Warning: strong language/profanity used.

Chapter 11 – Can't Find My Way Home

In time, during the autumn and winter months, they fell into routine where Nelly would run Opie's household and look after the daily necessities of his kids, while he provided her with whatever she needed to accomplish those tasks. Almost every time he came home late at night, she'd still be there, and they would settle at the kitchen table over dinner or share a bottle of beer, and talk. They talked about the events of their day, the kids, the troubles of SAMCRO, and planned for the day ahead. This nighttime shelter of quiet conversations crafted a new kind of intimacy between them, it helped them come to grips with this new world and new life, it healed their pain. And then, after sharing their thoughts, Opie and Nelly always retreated to their separate beds in separate houses. As he walked Nelly to his front gate, and watched her cross the street and disappear into her house every evening, Opie's instinct told him that there was something wrong with this picture. He found himself longing for Nel during those brief times when she was away.

The club's holiday party was happening in a few days and Opie really wanted Nelly there with him. She had been attending family dinners at Gemma's since that day she confronted him at the clubhouse, and Opie knew that Gemma and others were fond of Nelly, but her coming to that party was his way of letting the club know that she was important to him.

Nelly flat out refused. "Dinners at Gemma's are about family, this is something else. Only Sons' old ladies and sweet-butts attend those."

"Then I'll tell them you're my sweet-butt." He joked, but blushed as he did.

"You wish." She too blushed as she ribbed him in return, then added, "Anyway, kids and I have a date with Toy Story."

Despite his teasing, he felt disappointed that she wouldn't come. To be honest, he only went because he was expected to show up. He drunk too much, he talked too much, and for some reason attracted attention of a porn star from LuAnne's outfit, who called herself Lyla and fondled him under the table. It was so easy to loose himself in all of it. As he was about to take her to one of the back rooms of the clubhouse, Jax stepped in his way. "What are you doing, Ope?"

"Enjoying myself. Isn't it why you wanted me here?" The alcohol was buzzing in his head, arming him with false swagger.

Jax silently dismissed the girl with a tip of his head and she objected. "Are you going to let him treat me this way, Ope?"

"Yes, I am." Opie gave her a level look, and she left in a huff.

When she was gone, Jax said, "I want you to be happy again, brother. Is this going to make you happy? A quick fuck with some whore?"

Opie glared at him. "You're the one to talk, Jax."

"Yeah, I am. Don't make the same mistakes I've made." He shook his blonde head, disappointed. "You've got a good woman at home with your kids, Ope. Go to her." Then he turned around and melted into the party.