Maura has watched Jane slowly walk towards her and stop beside the bed. Each step brought Jane closer, but each one made Maura incrementally more anxious. It felt as though it took a lifetime, and all the while Maura found herself looking for any hint that it was all an awful joke. Logically, she knows that Jane would never tease in such an awful way, would never kiss her and use the word love unless it were true. But another tiny, fragile and damaged part of her is having difficulty in accepting that Jane is in love with her. Wants her. All of her.
Jane. How can such a plain name belong to such a woman. And yet Maura has no words to describe Jane. She considers herself to be an educated and eloquent woman, but none of the words that pop into her head do justice to describing the woman before her. Strong, bold, confident, beautiful, enigmatic, powerful, stubborn, statuesque, protective, loyal, fierce - all them could be used to accurately describe Jane, but there's one missing. The defining one. The one that describes why Jane is so incredibly important to her, and why Jane couldn't possibly care for her so. It's illogical, she knows, but she can't help thinking that if two sets of parents - the people who by definition are meant to love you unconditionally - hadn't wanted her, how could she expect that Jane would?
She has wished for Jane's love since the second week of their then fledgling friendship. Nine days, to be exact, of brief but friendly small talk during work hours was all it had taken for Maura to be taken with Jane. While she was thrilled by every step closer that they took, especially the night that Jane had first appeared at her door, she had always secretly wished they could one day be more than friends. More than best friends. She had even been actively pursuing Jane for the last couple of weeks. But now that it's actually happening, it's taking Maura a while to reconcile the dream with reality.
Her insecurities are quickly defeated though, and all it takes is a small, shy smirk from Jane. Jane is worth putting her heart on the line for. Because she trusts Jane with her life.
Maura reaches out her hand into the space between them. Jane takes it immediately and holds tight. It is as if Jane is aware of the metaphorical significance, but really, that's just Jane. And Jane will never leave her hanging.
# Maura wanted her own tiny introspective chapter too. Who am I to deny the Maura muse? Plus it balances out the story before the bedroom action scene! Thanks for reading guys :)
