Well, at long, long, loooonnnggg last, here's an update. I also went back over and reposted the previous chapters, because I didn't like some of the wording before, so if you read the whole thing except for this chapter, you haven't missed anything. Enjoy!
Chapter 11
I wasn't even given a moment to gasp for breath. The rush was so intense, and so sudden, that I felt like a fish yanked from a quiet stream, and hurled into a maelstrom of sight and sound. I no longer had any control over my body; indeed, I really couldn't tell what my body was anymore. Then, the change was so riveting that it excluded all other awareness, to the point that I forgot about being Anna, about being Annalynne, about being nervous and excited and still deeply scared, until I merely existed in the space, the time that had been brought on by the mere tip of Avima's finger.
In front of my eyes, or my mind, or something, a brilliant river of color and light streamed by, twisting and shifting and changing until I almost grew dizzy from the beautiful movement. It was so bright, I would have blinked and closed my eyes, if the mind had eyelids. As it was, I just looked and looked, drinking it in, until it began to dim strangely. Lines of dark crisscrossed the sight; it was not a malevolent darkness, but more like the necessary darkness that succeeds the day. The lines grew closer and more distinct in front of me, rapidly morphing into a perfect replica of the lines that had marked my body. Leaves sprouted off of the dark lines, and they began to wind and spin around themselves. They wove a sort of net around me, and though I could not feel it in a material sense, it seemed like my very essence was being mummified in vines, wrapped and encased and almost smothered in active green. Just when I thought I might panic under the pressure, that this might be what dying was, the vines began to somehow integrate themselves into me, until they no longer constricted but instead became an intrinsic part of the whole. They sank further and further in, until they touched my core, my center, that indescribable seed of energy, and as soon as they touched it, it expanded. Exploded.
It was like before, at the school, only more so. Much, much bigger. The seed sprouted, shooting forth limbs of this pure energy, blossoming in all of my being until I couldn't feel anything but the humming, throbbing power. Gradually, I could begin to feel my body again, in pieces, though I didn't really register the presence of the familiar meadow. There were trees around me, but it wasn't the physical form that held my attention. It was the light, the life, the unbelievable force that lived inside of the trees and all the plants around me.
Eyes wide with awe, I stretched my arms over my head and breathed as deeply as I could, reveling in the feel of my lungs expanding, contracting, the pull of every nerve under my skin as I reached towards the sky, standing on my tiptoes. It was a sense of strength that I had only felt in my dreams before, those dreams where I was a bird, a superhero, anything other than simple and human, those dreams that hurt so much to lose in the morning. In those dreams, all it took was a thought, and then I'd be soaring across the sky, screaming through the air and clouds, more free than I'd ever been. Now, with Avima's gift, I felt that strength again, deeply familiar. So, I thought hard, willed what I wanted, and then I really was flying. The trees shot away to either side of me, the branches twisted back so as not to infringe on my flight. Up in the deep, deep blue sky, I paused and gazed down all around me, at the miles and miles of endless forest. I couldn't see any cities, but the brilliance of the spirits of the forest could have outshone any stretch of metal and concrete. There really wasn't even a word to describe the beauty of it.
As my eyes began to adjust to the splendor, I stared below me, looking for the clearing that I'd left. Far, far down in the woods, I could see a tiny figure blazing with power, which seemed to be staring back up at me. Avima.
Taking my time, I drifted back down to where she stood, seeing as much as I could in the limited time. Finally, I slowed to a stop at ground level, letting my feet rest on the forest floor. I took another cleansing breath before looking up to meet her eyes.
"Thank you," I said simply.
"Your welcome," she replied.
"Why didn't you come with me? Can you not do...that?" I had thought she said she had many different abilities, all the ones that I would get, and yet she'd stayed on the ground when she could have been flying towards the sky, too.
"I have seen it many, many times, and though it never grows less amazing, the first time is always the most potent. I wanted you to be able to have undiluted joy in your first true sight of the forest, and all the Forest Intimate." I smiled at her, as wide as I could, and she seemed pleased. However, I continued to glance around, at the woods, and sky, and the clearing, anywhere but down at myself. Avima watched me for a second, and then frowned.
"Anna, you have to look sometime. I promise, it is not as hideous as you might fear."
My heart clenched a little, realizing that she knew what I still didn't dare to find out. Grimacing, bracing, I finally steeled myself to look down, to see how my body had reflected the amazing changes that the rest of me had undergone.
It, honestly, was no worse than I had imagined, although that was certainly bad enough. No, not bad. Simply...strange.
My body had altered into a tree-like form like that which Avima had used when she first actually talked to me. However, there were a few obvious differences. Her form was loose and free-flowing, resembling the weeping willow to which she seemed so attached. I, too, had those vine-like appendages, in place of hair and dangling off of other parts of my body. However, I was a much darker color of green, like the forest shadows at twilight and my shape seemed more sturdy, less malleable. Where before I had had a normal human torso, now thick, woody vines wrapped around me in rigid, vaguely familiar patterns, almost like the bark off of a tree. The leaves were closer to the shape of a star than anything, and they covered my body like a skin-tight suit. All the vines on my body were less flexible than those on Avima, almost like they were tiny saplings or branches that were sprouting off of me. Yes, branches, like I was a living, breathing, stunned tree, but one of stronger stature than a weeping willow. Shifting and craning over my shoulder, I saw that the same thing had happened to the backside of me, though I still retained a vaguely human form underneath all the growth. Curious, I lifted one of the delicate leaves that adorned me, and was momentarily shocked by the sudden flash of color. The undersides of the leaves were vivid hues of orange and red, like the brightest leaves in the fall, flaring up at me.
Suddenly, I dashed to a nearby pool and stared into it, taking in my first full-length sight of my new self. A swift breeze swept down from the sky, lifting the leaves on my body so that I shone as brightly as a tree in autumn. For a second, I could not reconcile the new, wild image with what I had once been. Even my eyes seemed different, somehow more fey, more full of life, of energy. As I stared, and slowly ran my hands up and down my arms, it gradually settled into my mind that this truly was me. And as I grew accustomed to it, it occurred to me that I was not ugly or freakish at all. Indeed, my new form was beautiful, in an alien sort of way.
Though I took this all calmly, a weakened, distant part of me wondered how on earth I could do so. It really hadn't been that long ago that I'd been going to school, going home, doing homework, just like a normal teenager. Then, all this had happened. And somehow, crazily enough, I'd adapted. There's being a human, for you. Or whatever I was now.
So, keeping in mind my deep, endless sense of calm, just in case I was merely in shock, I turned back to Avima and said, "Alright. What do I do next?" Calm. I am calm, at peace inside. Don't think too hard. Just do. Do what you're here for.
She seemed surprised by my peaceful demeanor, but didn't question it.
"Now I finally can teach you all that you need to learn. Some things I will teach you by voice, and others I will merely be able to show you, as there is no way to describe the action sufficiently. It will not be easy, but it will not last forever."
She was still treating me like the human I had been. Impatient, always eager to move on to the next thing and anxious if that didn't happen fast enough. She would have to learn, too.
"I'm ready."
She stared at me for another second, judging, and then seemed to decide that it would have to do.
Let me say, if they taught me in human school the way that Avima taught me during our time in the forest, I might have been a little more inclined to learn. Of course, they would have tried to teach me Calculus and grammar, and all those things just tended to pale in light of what Avima had to show me. There were no textbooks for this knowledge she wanted to impart. There never could be.
"The first thing you have to learn is not actually about the forest and what you do here. Instead, it is more of learning to take a step backward, to where you might be if you'd not lived so long as a human before changing. You have had years and years to ingrain yourself with the need to communicate. Or rather, with the need to speak aloud." Avima lifted her eyebrows in a condescending manner.
"Your human words are all very fine for connecting in a shallow, simple way. However, to continue at any rate in your learning with me, you must go back to a different way. There is a time, at birth, where even humans have a different way of communicating. Words, spoken through the mouth, are not necessary at that point. Though many don't realize it, human infants can communicate with their parents without words, and not just in the grunts and shrieks that so seem to characterize human young. There is a sort of, well, I believe you would call it telepathy, that is used in lieu of the standard speech. Humans are trained out of this at as young an age as possible, and then gradually forget that they ever had the ability at all."
We were sitting near a good-sized stream, leaning back on moss-covered stones and letting the light sunshine warm our bodies. However, the mood itself was not nearly as relaxed. Avima managed to impart a sense of urgency into everything she said, which both energized me to learn and also wore down on me a little. However, I was determined to show how dedicated I was to my path, so she would have as little opportunity as possible to chastize my lingering human characteristics. At that point, I felt there was very few things I wouldn't do to keep this connection with the forest, and expand it.
"This is something you must undo. You have that ability deep inside you, ingrained, but we must work to bring it back into the open. Only then will I be able to impart all the knowledge that cannot be put into words. Fortunately, because you were born with this ability, it should not be terribly difficult to regain the skill."
While she spoke, I was searching back, as far back in my memory as I could, seeking that hidden skill she spoke of. I honestly couldn't remember ever having any sort of telepathy, though the idea struck me as more of a possibility that it might have even a short month ago. Had there been a time, before my ability to recall, when I'd been able to do that? Avima had been right about so much else, it seemed silly not to put my trust in her now. I shifted my body to work out the kinks, and then noticed she was staring at me.
"Are you paying attention?"
"Yes, yes, I was just trying to remember being able to, you know, speak with my mind. I figured it might be easier if I could at least have a memory of it, but I don't."
"That is not surprising. As I said, you will have gradually forgotten the ability over time as you learned to speak with your mouth. However, now we must begin to retrieve it, so quit thinking so hard and focus on me."
I turned, training my eyes willingly on her face, actually looking forward to this new change. The strangeness of the whole situation registered so little with me anymore.
Her eyes were intense, a deep, deep emerald green, and the black pupil in the center seemed to be trying to pierce into my head. I sat patiently, trustingly, waiting for her to do whatever it was she had to do. The sounds of various insects buzzing around the clearing seemed to intensify as we grew silent, though only a few birds chirped in the late afternoon warmth. Avima still didn't move or change, but just sat staring, until I almost wanted to fidget. The buzzing of the insects grew even louder, punctuated by climbs and falls in volume, almost like a cadence. It sounded vaguely familiar, and I forgot about Avima's eyes while I tried to place the strange feeling of deja vĂș. The locusts in the trees were so loud I could hardly even concentrate anymore, they were scrambling my thoughts, I couldn't place the sound...Avima's hands clenched in her lap, and the slight movement brought my attention back out of my head and onto her face. The strain on it surprised me, so at odds with the relatively peaceful feel of the forest, and I believe that if she had been capable of sweating, she would have been. Whatever she was doing, it was not easy.
But I didn't feel any change. The only thing that seemed to be affecting me was the sound of those insects, buzzing so loud now that I couldn't hear my own breath, and it became ever harder to sit still and focus. The noise grated on my nerves, and seemed to put a strange pressure on my head, digging at it and making it begin to ache. I grimaced and started to shake my head to dislodge the feeling, but Avima made a sharp negating gesture with her right hand, and I froze again. If it was possible, her eyes grew even more intense, until I felt like she was drilling inside my head, making it hurt. The pressure grew and grew, and I couldn't move or cradle my head in my hands to make it stop, because Avima did not want me to move, and Avima was usually right, but now my head really HURT, and if this took much longer I was going to have to move, to get away from that grating noise that the insects were making, and it was just getting too strong, what was going on, that really hurt!!
--Hello, Annalynne--
Well, now she was talking again, and I'd sat here being so patient with my headache when she wasn't even going to accomplish anything. That was just great. Now that that hadn't worked what were we going to do?
And with a muffled pop, the pain was gone from my head.
--That's better, isn't it?--
I refocused on Avima again, and saw she was smiling slightly, tired but apparently pleased with something.
"Yes, the pain is gone, but what are we going to do--"
It was only then that it occurred to me that her lips had not moved.
--I told you you'd remember how.--
It took me a few seconds to understand just exactly what she meant. And then, partly out of curiosity and partly out of instinct, I directed my attention to Avima and thought as hard as I could.
--Is this how it works?--
She winced, rubbing her own head as if she was getting a headache, too.
--Would you mind not yelling?-- she grumbled.
"Oh, sor--" I cut myself off.
--Oh, sorry.--
--That's better.-- She looked weary again.
--Umm, why didn't I have to do anything?-- This mode of communication became easier and easier as I used it, like something I'd always been able to do. Which, according to Avima, I had.
--You forgot how to do it such a long time ago, there wasn't really anyway you could help. I'm sorry about the pain it caused, but I had to force you rather quickly back into a different habit. And as fascinating as this all is, I need to rest. There will be no more teaching today.--"
With that, she lowered her eyelids and drifted back towards the nearest tree, fuzzing and changing until she seemed to blend with it's textured bark. Within seconds, I could barely make out where the tree ended and Avima began.
Of course, she needed the rest. But that left me all alone, by myself in my head with no one to talk to.
