"Hey!" Jayne yelled at his captain. "Why am I always gettin' blamed for everythin'? I'm offended by your...your..."

"Discrimination."

"What she said."

Mal glared at his mercenary and pilot. "That's enough outta both of you. And, River, don't encourage him with them big words. Ain't never gonna be a smart man."

Jayne flashed him an evil glare. "Ain't no call for bringin' somethin' like that up, Cap'n. No call at all."

Mal raised his chin in a challenge. "Callin' it like it needs to be said, Jayne. What there's no call of is bein' so uppity like a bee in your hind. Don't be scared of the truth."

"Ain't scared of no truth. You tha one should be scared."

Mal straightened up. "You threatenin', Jayne."

"Nope. I ain't the one you scared of."

He smirked. "Oh?"

"The organ responsible for life is one feared through for no good reason as does not rule that which you actually are afraid of."

Everyone looked to the floor where the pilot sat, drawing. "Thank you, Crazy Moon Brain," Jayne said, rolling his eyes.

She looked peacefully up at her insulter. "It is the truth you seek to inform the Captain about."

"Most my life's been without you defendin' me. Think I did just fine without ya."

"'Sides," Mal just had to add, "he ain't understandin' you no how."

"Oh, you gonna act all knowingly when we all know your brain ain't got the capacity to know Crazy's mind."

Mal glared at Jayne. "Watch out, Jayne. Throwin' those big words 'round you might get confused for a learned man."

"Ain't no confusion. I know lots of things."

Mal snorted loudly as River and Inara exchanged looks and eye rolls. "What you know ain't worth crap, Jayne Cobb."

Jayne sat up straight, his eyes so narrow they were slits. "I know 'nough to stay alive an' I know 'nough on how ta kill a man. Think that's a pretty good head up on some."

"Children not yet weaned from their Ma's know that much, Jayne."

"Knowledge comes not just from books but also from a way of life," River blurted out. "Opportunities missed pave the way for future gain and those who live long while forgetful of their verses can tell of memory passed."

Jayne flat out ignored her. "All's I'm sayin' is I ain't too dumb to know what's what an' you are too 'fraid of 'motions ta get past your basic thoughts."

Mal laughed. "You playin' shrink doctor, Cobb?"

Inara felt the need to intervene. "Mal, perhaps it's time to stop being childish and quit trying to pick fights."

He stuck out his bottom lip in a pout. "Jayne started it, An' now he's spoutin' go se that needs to be challenged."

"Ain't done it," Jayne protested.

River closed her notebook and stood, stretching gracefully. "Jayne has merely put my thoughts into a comprehensible language you can follow, Captain Daddy."

Mal looked between the two suspiciously. "Since when you talk crazy, Jayne?"

"Ain't done it," he repeated, looking perplexed. "Just speakin' mind s'all. Don't know nothin' 'bout Crazy Bird talkin'."

"I find that interestin'," the captain said but Simon entered the area, looking down.

"Kaylee angered at deception," River noted.

The crew members scattered like flies, not wanting to get in the middle of that particular battle.