Eyes of the Broken Soul
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor am I affiliated in any way with Naruto. I just like the show and mangas so I wrote this fanfic.
Naruto faces his own fears and low self worth, finding a new determination to carry on growing. Will the others be able to help him pick up the pieces of his shattered soul?
Hope you enjoy the next chapter.
--
Chapter 11 - Searching for Hope
The shuffling of busy feet and hard working hands sounded briskly throughout the stalls and shops that littered Konoha's streets as four quite souls walked down it's dusty paths, silhouetted in the increasingly heated midday sun. Kurenai and Kakashi watched carefully from behind as Iruka held Naruto closely under his arm. The chunin slowly stroked the boy's back, still trying to ease the pain and fear he felt inside the blond's agonized heart.
"Is it... always like this between them?" Kurenai looked over to the masked jounin as he quietly murmured his questioning thoughts. She could see the pain still evident his expression and she knew it definitely had something to do with what happened a few minutes earlier.
"Yea, I guess it is. Naruto has lived a difficult life so far and has only recently found someone to love him and protect him. He hardly ever travels far from Iruka's side and is almost always in his arms if the opportunity allows it. I guess being alone and isolated for so long, with no-one to love and comfort him, has made the boy terrified of losing contact with the only one who ever tried to help him out of that nightmare."
Kakashi didn't even try to hide his anguished sigh. Hearing Kurenai say those things made him feel a sickening knot form in his stomach. The way Naruto clung so desperately to Iruka's side was almost heart breaking to watch, but the jounin was beginning to understand why he acted that way. No doubt Naruto was feeding off his sensei's comforting emotions, trying to recover from the ordeal the boy had just been through, an ordeal Kakashi himself had never really gotten over in all these years.
Just then, as if to rescue the jounin from his deteriorating thoughts, the ramen stand they were headed towards suddenly came into view. The old man Teuchi burst into a massive grin as he saw the approach of his favorite customer, but his smile soon soured when he saw the distressed look on the boy's tear-drenched face.
"Ah, it's good to see my favorite boy back here again!" The old man muttered as they walked into his stall, trying to sound as cheerful as possible. Naruto managed a brief smile at that, much to Teuchi's relief, but his face still marked heavily with the evidence of dry tear stains.
"And... I see you've brought a new friend as well." Kakashi just waved as he and Kurenai followed into the store. Kurenai had already been there once with Naruto and Iruka so she needed no introduction. The old man forced a smile as the four sat down and then asked for their orders. By now, Naruto was able to make out the words on the menu and he quickly ordered his meal in a polite manner.
A few minutes later saw Naruto almost returning to his normal self as he happily gulped down one bowel of steaming ramen after another, much to the surprise of the masked jounin that sat nearby. Although Kurenai and Iruka were now used to the boys veracious appetite, the copy ninja was becoming deeply concerned by this clear defiance of the laws of nature, gravity, displacement, energy and overall general physics.
"Just where the hell does all that food go to?" Kakashi mused, looking over the short scrawny figure that was Naruto.
He had seen the boy's small body the previous day during the water walking exercise and it looked as though Naruto hadn't been fed a decent meal in years, or ever for that matter, but here he was loading more ramen into his small frame than an Akamichi could possibly hope to match. Almost equally surprising, and much to the disbelief of Iruka and Kurenai, was that Kakashi himself had already finished his own bowel of ramen before they knew what hit them and neither of them had even seen him remove his mask to eat. How the hell did he do that!? No jounin was that fast... were they?
Teuchi just watched with a growing smile as he saw the blond's face slowly begin to light up with glee, finishing of his seventh bowel of steaming goodness, only this time it was a more genuine smile. It seemed the boy's favourite food was all he needed to help cheer up, although Iruka's presence most certainly helped too. Once the boy was finally finished his food, he looked up to the old man with a massive grin.
"Thanks Teuchi-sama! That was great!" Kakashi felt a sudden lump form in his throat. After seeing Naruto so upset before, it was relieving to see the young blond smiling so wildly again. Iruka was about to hand over the bill when the masked jounin interceded.
"I've got this one Iruka." He eye-smiled, handing over the money in Iruka's stead.
The young man smiled in return while Naruto looked up at the tall man with forlorn eyes. As he scanned over the image of the silver haired jounin, he couldn't help but cringe in discomfort. He didn't know what he saw when looking into the Kakashi's eyes, but he somehow knew it must have been deeply painful experience from his past. Naruto wanted to ask what happened, but eventually decided against it. Some things were better left buried and some things were just too painful to remember, Naruto knew that better than anyone else.
After giving their thanks for the meal, as well as a generous tip, the four of them finally said their farewells to a grateful Teuchi and slowly headed out the ramen stand. As they stood on the side of the dusty streets Kurenai eventually spoke up to break the looming silence.
"So Kakashi, you mentioned yesterday that you may have a solution to increasing Naruto's training speed. Mind telling us what it was?" Kakashi motioned his head towards Naruto, causing the others to look over in the blond's direction.
The boy gave out a deflated sigh, he knew that meant it was time for the adults to talk privately. He slowly walked away from his three teachers, kicking the dust beneath his feet as he went. Naruto made sure not to wander too far though, knowing all too well about the ever present dangers of being amongst the villagers that hated him.
"So then, what is it?" Iruka murmured, turning back to face Kakashi.
"I've decided to teach Naruto the Shadow Clone Jutsu. It should help him immensely when it comes to learning faster and with some luck, he may even be able to catch up to the rest of his class." Both Kurenai's and Iruka's mouths seemingly dropped to the floor.
"You're gonna what!?" they both shouted in unison, causing a curious Naruto to look over at the three. Both of them knew what the jutsu did and it's 'unique' benefits, but they also knew the high risks involved with such a high level technique.
"You do realize that that's a kinjutsu you're talking about here. It's to dangerous to just go teach to anyone you fell like. I mean how do you even know it in the first place?" Kakashi gave out a deflated sigh, he knew Iruka would drill him for this.
"My sensei was the one who created the technique in the first place and he managed to teach it to me before the risks were discovered and it was declared a forbidden jutsu. The main repocussions involved are the high amounts of chakra it takes to use it, but Naruto seems to have an abundance of that at his disposal. This means that the only real threat is the physical strain on Naruto's body."
"So you really think this is a good idea? I mean Naruto is still quite young, his body may not be able to handle it even if his chakra levels can." Kurenai mused.
"I agree" Kakashi replied. "But he should be able to create two extra clones of himself without any real problems. Besides, things have become a lot more complicated now." The other two stared at the masked jounin in confusion before he continued to explain.
"Whatever insight Naruto's doujutsu gives him, it seems to carry as much risk as his physical touch, if not even more. Judging by what happened this morning, we have to get it under control as soon as possible to avoid further incidents, this is the only way to do it." As much as Iruka hated to admit it, Kakashi did have a point. Although the Shadow Clone Jutsu did have risks, they were problems they at least knew about and could effectively work around. Naruto's bloodline, however, was still a mystery and mysteries could be far more dangerous.
"Alright, it's decided then. We'll go through with the Shadow Clone Jutsu training." Both Kurenai and Kakashi nodded in final agreement. They then turned to retrieve Naruto once again, only to find the boy wasn't there anymore.
"N.. Naruto? Naruto!!!!???"
--
A cruel snicker echoed throughout the walls of a dark tattered alleyway, piercing through the heart of a young boy as he slowly backed away from the large shadowy figure of the drunken man standing in front of him, his eyes filled with dread at the thought of receiving another beating. The young boy had heard a commotion coming from around a nearby corner from where he stood and had decided to investigate, much against his better judgement. Apparently the burly man had been thrown out of a nearby bar and was now taking his frustrations on the surrounding debris, that is until he caught sight of a better opportunity for relieving his built up anger in a certain young boy.
Naruto tried to run away, but the man had cornered him off before he could even get far, forcing him back into the dark alleyway.
"Please, don't hurt me... I didn't do anything" Naruto yelped, stepping back as the man walked towards him, his eyes dark with a sadistic glint.
"Oh how... 'hic'... sad, the little demon is crying for mommy to save him." The man then swung his massive hand without even thinking for a second, smacking Naruto on the side of the cheeks and sending him hurtling to the floor. "Hehe... 'hic'... now that felt good."
"Nggghhh!!!" The young boy yelped in pain as he held his throbbing cheeks, but he quickly got up to his feet soon afterwards. Naruto then backed up against the cold hard wall as his instincts always told him to do and closed his eyes in preparation for the ensuing abuse. Tears began to stream down his face as he felt the man's shadow falling over his small quivering form, his attacker's breath oozing with the bitter smell of alcohol. Naruto tried to call for help, he tried to scream the words that clung to the back of his throat, but his fears held his voice shut as his body quivered violently in terror.
"I guess today's my lucky day." The man snickered, slamming his fist into his hand in preparation for the beating. "I get to have fun with the little monster." Naruto took a deep, wavering gulp as he felt the man raise his fist to strike.
"Take this... 'hic'... you little shit!" But before the drunkard's blow could land on it's mark, a small thud was heard in it's place.
Naruto froze in his sandals, not knowing why he hadn't been struck yet. He carefully opened his tear filled eyes, only to see a fist clenched firmly in front of his face with another hand holding it stiffly in place. The boy looked up to see his rescuer, finding the face of the masked jounin as halted his attacker's advance.
"You've made a very big mistake!!!" Kakashi growled, throwing so much killing intent into the air that it was almost tangible. Kakashi's only visible eye was filled with an endless amount of burning rage, so much so that even Naruto didn't dare to gaze into it.
"Why are you protecting this little monster?! He's nothing but a..." The man soon found out the consequences in his poor choice of words as the enraged copy ninja grabbed his throat and promptly slammed him into the opposite wall. A sickening crack was heard as his head hit against the hard surface behind him. "Agghhh!!!!"
Naruto watched on in complete shock as the jounin effectively knocked the man into unconsciousness with a single hardened blow. Blood began to fall from the back of his head and down the wall he was held against. Kakashi then let go of his grip and let the body fall limply to the floor. Naruto, having fallen into a complete state of shock, then sank down against the wall he was leaning against and then proceeded to cry on the floor, releasing the tension of what had just happened through his tears. Kakashi turned around to face the sobbing boy as he sat on the floor, walking up to Naruto to check if he was unharmed.
"Are you okay?" Kakashi gulped, reaching his hand out to touch the boy's shoulder.
Naruto immediately noticed his advancement and quickly pulled away from his grasp, still holding his hands up to his face as the tears poured over them. The masked jounin pulled his hand away again, realizing that the boy didn't want to be touched by anyone he didn't trust. The jounin was relieved, however, to see that Naruto only had a red bruise on his left cheek. Most of the damage, no doubt, was psychological.
Just at that moment, Iruka and Kurenai charged into the alleyway, franticly searching for the lost boy. The chunin's face went pale when he caught sight of a crying Naruto sitting on the floor only a small distance away from a large unconscious man.
"Oh no... what have they done this time?" Iruka ran up to the boy and quickly fell down into a crouch beside him. "Naruto, what happened? Are you alright?" At the sound of his sensei's voice, Naruto quickly looked up from his tears and leapt into Iruka's arms, crying on his shoulder as he held on for dear life.
"I... Iruka-sensei..." the boy mumbled, not letting go of the man. Kuenai walked over to the blank, expressionless face that was Kakashi and then looked down to the unconscious man beside him.
"W... what happened here?" Kakashi snapped out of his daze and looked over to the red-eyed jounin.
"Naruto was about to be attacked by this drunk when I found him. If I arrived any later..." The copy ninja's visible face fell into a heavy cringe, emanating with the frustration he felt inside. "How... how can they do this to such a young boy?" The jounin's voice was filled with a deep anger that threatened to tear apart anything that it fell upon.
The two then watched as Iruka tried to release Naruto's hold on him, but the boy didn't want to let go. He eventually resigned to picking Naruto up off the floor and carrying him in his arms back to the training field. The boy just held on to his sensei's jacket as tightly as he could, not wanting to leave his defensive shield of protection. Kurenai began to follow soon afterwards, but then realized Kakashi was still standing in place.
"Aren't you coming?" she murmured, gaining the jounin's wavering attention.
"I'll be with you guys soon, I just have a special delivery to make for Ibiki." The woman just nodded her head in understanding before turning to follow Iruka. Kakashi then turned back to the unconscious man laying on the floor.
--
Somewhere, a lone wandering Anko felt a chill crawl up her spine.
"Ooohhh! Is someone thinking about me?" she murmured to herself, before taking a bite off her dango stick. "I... haven't felt a chill... like that since standing... in front of Orochimaru for... the first time." she murmured, as she chewed on her meal. The truth is, there were three people in Konoha who know had Anko on the brain. The sadistic jounin was about to get a lot of 'special' requests in the next few coming days.
--
Iruka and Kurenai eventually found themselves walking back into the quiet safety of their private training field, the said chunin still carrying a panic stricken Naruto in his arms. He gently let the boy down onto the grass underneath the shade of a nearby tree and sat himself next to him, letting out a deep breath as he did. He then turned to look down at the boy sitting next to him with concerned eyes.
"Are you alright?" The man murmured, putting his arm around a still shaking Naruto. The boy just gave a small nod before leaning his head against his sensei's chest.
"I... I'll be fine." he stuttered through his sobs. Iruka could feel Naruto's emotions slowly coming back under control. He gave a deep sigh of relief and squeezed the boy in comfort. Naruto had cried far to many tears today... far to many. The chunin was just about ready to kill every villager in sight, in fact the only thing stopping him from doing just that was the fact that he knew Naruto wouldn't approve of such an action.
"Naruto, if you like, we can stop the training for today and continue tomorrow. What do you say?" Naruto pulled of Iruka's chest and sat upright, looking down at the grass as he thought about his sensei's proposal.
"No Iruka-sensei. I have to carry on training, otherwise I'll never get better. I have to catch up to the rest of my class if I ever want to become a shinobi." Iruka could feel a sudden spurt of determination flowing from Naruto's touch and then smiled. It seemed the boy was adamant, despite what he had just been through. Kurenai herself found her lips etching into a grin, but it was a somewhat sad and empty one. It was hard to truly smile after seeing the boy she cared for in so much pain.
"Alright Naruto, if that's what you want. Kurenai and I will always be here for you the whole time." The boy looked up and smiled at his two precious people, the only two who were ever allowed to touch him.
"I know..."
"It's good to hear you're ready to continue, because it's time to teach you something even more exciting." The three sets of eyes immediately shot up to see Kakashi sitting on a branch above them.
"How long have you been waiting there?!" Kurenai scowled, her eyes drilling into the masked jounin. Kakashi jumped off the branch and landed smoothly in front of his companions.
"I just got here now if you must know. Naruto, if you don't mind, can you please meet me in the centre of the field?" Naruto reluctantly left the safety of Iruka's arms and complied, walking away with a heavy sigh. Once he left for his destination Kakashi turned to his companion's and spoke again.
"Once we have this jutsu down, I think one of us should also start Naruto on self defence training as well, perhaps some taijutsu to begin with. He'll have to be able to protect himself when we're not around to look after him." The other two nodded in agreement and then watched as Kakashi moved over to where Naruto stood.
The masked jounin could see the nervousness in the boy's body language as he approached, realizing Naruto was still in shock after what he had just been through.
"So, are you sure you're ready to continue our training?" Kakashi murmured as he stepped up to the blond. "If you want to stop for now I understand completely." Naruto took a deep gulp before answering.
"Y... yes Kakashi-sama, I'm sure." The jounin shrugged at the boy's formal use of words, but knew it was only because Naruto was still intimidated by him somewhat. But he knew what he was about to say next would cheer Naruto up.
"Good, because now I'm going to be teaching you a new jutsu and a very high level one at that." Kakashi's one eye looked carefully over the boy, waiting to see his reaction and, as expected, Naruto's face blew up into the very embodiment of excitement. He knew that would put a grin on Naruto's face.
"R... really?! What is it?" The masked jounin smiled under his.
"It's a very advanced form of the replication jutsu you were learning at the academy. It's called the Shadow Clone Jutsu." Naruto's eyes went wide with excitement and anticipation, but then quickly lost their sparkle as a sudden memory came to mind.
"I... I already tried to learn that jutsu, but I couldn't read the instructions on the scroll" Naruto skulked as he recalled the night of Mizuki's betrayal. Kakashi was surprised at first, but then remembered what Iruka told him about Naruto stealing the scroll of sealing on Mizuki's behalf.
"Ah yes, that may be true, but this time you won't be reading anything. I'm going to be showing you how to do it myself." Naruto's face lit up once more at the sound of Kakashi's words. Suddenly this day got a whole lot better for the boy.
The next few minutes were spent with Kakashi explaining the ins and outs of the Shadow Clone Jutsu, as well as it's advantages and risks. The boy listened with complete attention, his eyes not once leaving the jounin instructer as he demonstrated the poses and hand seals. After all that was said and done, Naruto began to attempt the jutsu for himself.
--
Naruto had now spent hours trying to activate the Shadow clone jutsu, but there was still no luck. The boy was slowly beginning to run low on chakra (and self confidence) after many repeated attempts to master the skill. Kakashi watched on with a heavy face and an even heavier heart as the boy tried over and over again, helping him out when he saw a mistake. He would have tried to help the boy settle into a better standing position and posture to make better use of his vast stamina reserves, but he knew Naruto wouldn't want to be touched so he had to resort to visually showing the blond what he could. After a few more unsuccessful attempts, Kakashi eventually raised his hand to call for a stop. He could see Naruto was close to pushing himself over the edge and he didn't want to be on the receiving end of his two protectors' wrath if something happened to the boy.
"Alright Naruto, that's enough for today. We can try again tomorrow after school." The said boy quickly threw his hands down in frustration. Even with Kakashi showing him how to do it, he still couldn't get it right.
"Why... why am I so useless!?! Why can I never get anything right?!" Naruto shouted, as tears formed in his eyes. Iruka and Kurenai heard the commotion from where they sat and watched on with heavy hearts. Kakashi looked over to the boy with saddened eyes.
"Naruto... that's the orphanage talking now isn't it?' Naruto flinched and looked up to the man with a sudden wince of pain in his heart.
"I......." Naruto was at a loss for words. The boy looked down at the ground and slowly broke into tears as the thoughts of his caretaker's cruel taunts flowed into his mind. Kakashi knew he hit a sore spot, but Naruto needed to hear this for his own good.
"Naruto..." Kakashi continued. "The reason you're always being held back is because you don't know how to believe in yourself any more. Those bastards at the orphanage have taken that away from you as well as many other things." Kakashi then knelt down in front of the boy and locked his eyes with Naruto's.
"I know what they said was cruel and sometime's you may even think they were actually telling the truth about you, but they were not right about you at all. I want you to know that you are definitely not useless, you're not any of those terrible things they made you feel like at the orphanage and you are most certainly not a monster."
Naruto felt his heart being pulled inside as listened to Kakashi's speech. The memories of Iruka's words of kindness flowed into his mind.
"Naruto isn't a monster, he's a special boy who I've come to love and acknowledge."
"Naruto... It's not about what's in here that's important. It's about what's in your heart that determines you who you really are deep inside."
"You did great Naruto, you did wonderfully. I'm so proud of you."
The boy felt a well of emotions filling up inside his body. He knew Iruka cared for him. He was the first person to really believe in the boy and he would always tell Naruto he was proud of him. It was the type of thing he always wanted from a father and he wasn't about to disappoint the man that held him in such high regard.
"Iruka-sensei, you've always believed in me. I won't let you down know."
Naruto then wiped the tears from his eyes and nodded in understanding, the boy knew what he had to do. He couldn't allow the cruelty of others to bring him down, he couldn't allow them to rule his life and determine who he really was inside. he looked up from the floor with newfound determination, staring into the eye of his instructor.
"Kakashi-sama... if you don't mind I would like to continue the training." Kakashi smiled as he saw the newfound determination in the boy's face and a glimmer of shimmering gold in his eyes. He then stood up again and nodded his head in approval.
"Alright, then lets do this." Naruto slammed his palms into each other once more and made a single seal. A sudden spike of chakra began to flow around his body, moving the grass apart under his feat. Kakashi, Kurenai and Iruka were all surprised by the sheer amount of chakra he still managed to radiate despite his severe exhaustion. "SHADOW CLONE JUTSU!!!"
A large puff of smoke erupted into the air around the boy, causing Iruka and Kurenai to stand up in anticipation. Kakashi's own heart froze in place as he waited for the haze to clear. When it did, an astonishing sight was met before their eyes. There, standing next to Naruto, was a picture perfect copy of the boy, fixed in the exact same pose as he was.
"Naruto!!! You did it!!!" Iruka yelled, pulling the boy out of his trance. Naruto looked over to his side to see another Naruto staring back at him in confusion. His face suddenly began to light up as he realized what he had just accomplished.
"I... did it... I really did it!" Naruto leapt into... Naruto's arms and the two identical twins began to jump up and down in excitement.
"I did it, I did it, I did it!!!" The other three watched with lifting spirits as the two boys danced in a circle, jumping up and down on the spot. Kakashi just laughed at the sight of it. One smile from Naruto was enough to lift your heart, two was that much better.
"Alright Naruto" Kakashi giggled. "It's time to dispel your clone."
"Hai!" Naruto did as Kakashi requested and held his seal to release his jutsu. Once the other Naruto disappeared in a puff of smoke, the boy turned to Iruka with massive grin on his face.
"Go ahead" Kakashi sighed, knowing what was coming. Naruto didn't even hesitate to comply and quickly ran over to his sensei. He leapt into Iruka's arms and squeezed as tightly as he could.
"I did it Iruka-sensei! I completed the Shadow Clone Jutsu!" The chunin felt a rush of emotions flowing into him as the boy began to quiver in his arms.
"I... I really did it..." It was almost as though the boy were still trying to convince himself of his own achievement.
"Yes Naruto... you did do it and I couldn't be more proud of you." Naruto then pulled out of the hug and gave his sensei a teary grin. He needed to hear that, he just needed to hear someone else say it, just so he knew it was really true. With that, Naruto's eyes began to fall dark and he soon collapsed unconscious onto the floor.
"N.. Naruto!" Iruka yelped as he watched Naruto hit the ground with a thud.
"Don't worry, he'll be alright." The panicked chunn looked up to a smiling Kakashi.
"He's just passed out from exhaustion that's all. Take him home and get some rest, he'll need it after today." Iruka let out a deep sigh of relief and then picked Naruto up off the floor.
"Kakashi... I just wanna say... thanks... for your help. You don't know how much this means to me and Naruto." Kakashi gave off an eye smile and waved the chunin off.
"I wouldn't have it any other way. I'll see you two tomorrow after school then." With that the jounin disappeared in a gust of wind and leaves. Kurenai smiled as he vanished out of sight. The masked freak was slowly making it from the 'people she must kill' list to the 'just barely tolerable' list. She would still have to see about those books of his though.
"I guess there's no studying tonight then." Iruka sighed as he looked down at the unconscious body in his arms. Naruto's face was so peaceful as he lay there quietly, almost completely at peace. It was almost as though he were still smiling in his sleep, remembering with pride what he had just managed to accomplish. The chunin then carried the young boy home in his arms, waving off Kurenai as they parted ways. Although it had been a very rough day for Naruto, Iruka had a feeling it turned out alright after all. The look on Naruto's face was one filled with hope and achievement. He was so very proud of the boy he came to think of as his son. Now he just needed to contact a certain sadistic ninja and set up a meeting.
--
It's back to school in the next chapter. Some more emotional clashes await as Naruto begins to re-find himself and mend the broken soul that was shattered by his past.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter! :)
