Chapter 11:
"So Spence, I have to ask," Hanna started as the girls sat around their dorm living room a few nights later.
"The answer is no Hanna." Spencer cut her off quickly with a roll of her eyes. She knew exactly what her blonde friend was going to ask, it was a question always on her mind.
"Wow, really? Haven't you guys been dating for almost two weeks now?"
"What's your point?" Spencer questioned as she reached for her glass of wine.
"Yeah, Han, please explain the workings of your brain to us." Aria chimed in.
"My point is that it's like a written rule that you sleep with the guy your dating after the first few dates." Hanna said as she leaned into her seat with a magazine.
Spencer rolled her eyes again. "Let me guess, Caleb and you have already slept together?"
"Of course, we've already been out on 5 dates."
"That is the most degrading thing I've ever heard Han. Woman who follow this 'rule' need to have their heads examined, starting with you."
"Oh c'mon Spencer, are you telling me that you never slept with Sc…" Hanna cut herself off when Spencer's face fell and she quickly threw her magazine down as she went to comfort her friend. "I'm sorry Spence. I wasn't thinking."
"No, its okay," She leaned into Hanna and sent a weak smile to the other two girls. "And no, Scott and I never slept together."
Silence fell over the girls, as each wondered if the night that had just begun was already over.
"Spence, do you want to talk about it?" Aria asked carefully. "I mean, you don't have too if you're not comfortable to tell us, but you know we are all here for you right?"
"I know, and I know I should talk about what happened, it's just," She let out a sigh and looked down at her hands. "I don't even know all the details of what went on that night, I only know what the paper said about it. There are so many questions I have and they will never be answered."
"You told us that you two got into a fight before the accident. What were you fighting about?" Emily asked as she moved to sit down next to Spencer on the floor.
"Thinking back to it now, it seems stupid." Spencer said as she took a small sip of her wine. "He had been pulling away from me and I called him out on it in a note."
"A note?" Hanna questioned. "Wouldn't it have been better to have talked in person?"
"Yes, it would have, but the problem was we never had the same free days off from work, so pretty much our last few weeks of dating were though text messages and MySpace. I knew what days he had to work so one night I drove by and stuck the note to his windshield."
"What did the note say?"
"That I was worried that our relationship was over and that if he wanted to break up with me, I would rather have him tell me to my face instead of giving me the silent treatment, but if he couldn't face me, than this was our goodbye. I also told him that I didn't need him to take me to that party my parents were throwing for Melissa at the club, I had found another date to bring and he was off the hook."
The girls starred at her in surprise. "You wrote all that to him? Wow, Spence, way to kick a guy to the curb without a chance of making it back on the sidewalk." Hanna spoke.
Spencer shook her head. "It gets worse. He had actually messaged me the day before the party and told me he was sorry for pushing me away, he did it because he was trying to spare my feelings for when he left."
Emily raised her hand out to interrupt Spencer from continuing the story. "Explain that last part to us. Spare your feelings for when he left, was he talking about his death?"
"I'm not sure, I think so. It makes sense now after everything that happened, and I know he was big on the supernatural. That same day of the message, he asked if he could still take me to the party, he wanted to keep his promise to me and I turned him down." Spencer paused as tears started to form in her eyes. "I told him I couldn't count on him not to stand me up again and as much as I wanted to go with him, I had to give the other guy a chance to prove himself."
"The next night I found out he passed away in a car accident. His car got a flat and the papers said he had gotten out of the car to fix it and ended up being killed by a drunk driver who smashed into the car, pinning him between the two."
Aria squeezed Spencer's hand in comfort; while Emily and Hanna just leaned in closer to hug her.
"I had logged on that night to email him and I had an invite to a memorial page for him. I thought it was a joke at first until I searched online and found all the articles." The tears were falling freely by this time. "I didn't know what to do, I was so angry at myself for how I spoke to him and I knew I couldn't take a word of it back. Everything I should have said to him, I lost the chance and it still kills me to this day knowing that I never got the chance to tell him how I really felt about us."
"He knows Spence, and he forgives you." Hanna said softly as she rubbed her friends back.
Spencer nodded as she brought her hand up to wipe her eyes. "I know I should be moving on with his death since it's been months now, but it's still so fresh in my mind that I wake up some mornings forgetting that he is gone."
"You have Toby now; do you think he will help you move on?" Aria asked.
Spencer half smiled with teary eyes. "Yeah, he already is, more than he probably knows."
The next day
"So we have two different movie times," Toby stated as he walked back into his living room with a newspaper in his hands. "Are you feeling an early movie or late?" He asked as he down on the couch and moved her legs to rest on his lap.
Spencer shifted the book she was reading down to her chest. "How about a late one, surprisingly enough I don't have a class in the morning."
Toby tossed the newspaper over to his coffee table and moved his hands to her legs, letting his fingers draw small circles on her skin. "So we have all afternoon to spend together before the movie, what would you like to do?"
"Well, even though I don't have class in the morning, I do have to finish this chapter for class." She sent him a small toothy smile. "You don't mind if I finish right?"
"Not at all," He smiled back. "I'll just watch you read."
"That's not creepy at all." She teased.
Toby laughed. "Just read your book Spence."
"Fine, it shouldn't take me much longer to get through the chapter." She said as she raised her book back in front of her face.
"Are you excited about graduating this year?"
"Yes and no. Yes because I will be done with my bachelor degree and one-step closer to becoming a lawyer. And no because I still have 3 or 4 more years of schooling left before I can take the BAR exam."
"It will all be worth it in the end."
Spencer sat up on her elbows, sending him a look. "You sound like a fortune cookie."
"Probably," He smiled and grabbed her hand pulling her up into his lap, wrapping his arms around her waist. "But you are going to make one kick ass lawyer that all the criminals are going to be scared shitless of."
"Thanks, I think." She laughed and leaned her body against his, opening her book back to the page she was reading before he pulled her over. "I'm still debating on which side of the law I want to defend."
"Really? You seem like the type of person who does not hit cross roads too often in her life."
"Usually I don't, but lately," She shrugged. "I've have a lot of big grown up decision that keep coming up and if I make the wrong choice, my whole future could be ruined."
"That's a little intense don't you think? Ruined just because you might pick the wrong profession?"
"Failure isn't in the Hastings game book."
"Spencer," Toby said seriously, as he carefully shut her book and moved it to the other side of the couch. "Failure is a part of life, without it, we don't grow and learn from our mistakes. So in the next few months, when this big choice comes up and you are wondering which one to make," He took her hand into his own. "I want you to come to me and if you want, I will help you in any way that I can."
Spencer smiled as looked up at him. "Thank you Toby that is exactly what I needed to hear."
"You are welcome." He said as he leaned down and placed a quick kiss on her lips. "So if you found out that you couldn't be a lawyer, what would you do with your life?"
"I'd give interior design a shot; my friends say I've always had an eye for it."
Toby smiled. "Now that is a job that I can see you enjoying very much. I should bring you by some of my units and see if you can work your design magic and help me fix them up enough to sell."
"Really? That would be great; I'd love to help out."
"I'll run the idea past my mother but I'm sure she won't see anything wrong with it." Toby rubbed her back slowly. "So I have an important question to ask you."
"Sure, anything."
"I have a big company party this weekend and I was wondering if you would be interesting in going with me and letting me show you off?" He asked with a smile.
"This weekend I'm all yours." Spencer smiled back.
"Great, the party starts at 7 but since I'm the host I have to be there around 6 to make sure everything is set up."
"Would it be okay if I meet you there for when it starts? I have a few things to do in the early afternoon and I don't want to hold you up if I'm running behind."
"Not a problem, I'll text you the address this weekend. Actually, Caleb will be there, why don't you and Hanna just come together, that way he can lend me an extra hand in setting up."
"I'm sure Hanna will love that idea, any extra time for her to get ready is a blessing. So what's the dress code, black and white ballroom style?" She asked with a half smile.
Toby laughed. "No, think more cocktail style attire."
"Oh much better, I was afraid I was going to have to drive back home and pull out one of the old ballroom dresses from my attic."
"You have ballroom dresses?" He questioned with a raised eyebrow. "Now this I have to see, do you have pictures?"
"I do but you will not be seeing them." She laughed.
"Oh c'mon!" He smiled and hugged her tighter to his body. "I bet you looked adorable, will you bring one for me to see the next time we get together?" He rested his head against the side of hers and kissed her temple. "Please?" He said as he started to kiss her neck.
"I'll think about it." She smiled and closed her eyes at the feeling of his lips on her skin.
"Mmm, okay." He muttered and pulled away reaching for her book, resting it back on her lap. "I'll stop bugging you and just go back to watching you read."
"Creeper." She teased again giving him a quick kiss before opening her book and leaning back into his chest.
A/N: So who else is excited that PLL is back on tonight?! I am! Can't wait to have something to do again on tuesday nights. haha. Anyway, hope you all enjoyed this chapter. This one was hard for me to write, but I think I did a good job on it. Let me know what you think. :) Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, you all ROCK! Love reading your comments, so please keep them coming for me.
All spelling and grammer mistakes are my own, sorry in advance.
