Chapter 10: Broken Trust Part I
Still half asleep I groped for Oswald beside me. I expected the firmness and warmth of his body under my fingertips, instead I felt the softness of the cold bottom sheet. My eyes burnt as I slowly opened them. "Oswald?", I muttered wearily. Raising up my upper body and rubbing my eyes I searched for any sign of my man. My man?! The idea of Oswald being my man conjured a smile on my face. Don't be stupid, it's far too soon to think like this.
Deeply disappointed I had to accept he was really gone. Plumping down on my bed again I imagined how it would have been like to wake up in his arms. A tickling frisson of pleasure pervaded my body. Rolling over onto my stomach I pressed the soft pillow against my face. He was still so palpable, his faint salty scent embedded into the cushion. Or was it the scent of our... well, what was it? Love making? Only sex? I could have sworn that he was still inside of me, this feeling of him filling me was still so current, like it was happening right now, at this very moment. Oswald wasn't the first man I slept with, but the emotions he let me experience were completely new. I felt different, my body felt different.
Anew I wondered what I truly felt. My prior thought was that we just would have our dirty fun. And now? I learned he let me be the first girl he had sex with, but was it really only a bodily connection we shared since last night? The way he kissed me, the way he touched me, held me... filled me... This act wasn't an animalistic one, an act only for pandering. Was it starry-eyed to think Oswald and me were linked in more ways than carnally? Only a few days ago I hurt him, scratched his face, so he would stay away from me. Last night I gave him corporeal love, scratched his back in passion and pressed him closer to me, so I could take in as much as possible from him. Could feelings change so rapidly? I didn't get it. I didn't understand what he was doing with me.
My lips were burning when I remembered his kisses. I grinned like a little schoolgirl who got her first innocent kiss. Longingly I caressed the empty space beside me. "Why did you leave?" The night with Oswald was so present. Are you cold? Should I close the window? It made me giggle once more. Who would have thought that he could be so caring? Would he lie next to me this night, I asked myself. Oswald's with lust twisted face formed in front of my inner eye. This vision set me on fire. Now I desperately wished he would be here.
It was time to get up, the early bird gets the worm! Well, it wasn't so early though. Curious I eyeballed my whole self in the mirror, spinning from side to side, twirling around. Was it just my imagination or were my cheeks more rosy, my body more womanly? Of course my breasts and butt didn't grow, but looking at my reflection made me more aware of my femininity. I felt great, sexy somehow. Oh, I really had get some new things, new lace underwear, a whole new outfit, perfume, make-up... Okay, let's forget about the make-up; he said I don't need it so much. But nothing spoke against a bright red lipstick, right? Not bothering to take on my underwear, and therefore any clothes, I went to the kitchen to make some breakfast. As usual, a cup of steaming coffee and toast. Snuggling into my soft and cuddly blanket I flopped on my sofa and let out a content sigh. A piece of paper caught my attention. Was this...? Indeed it was! The copy of our agreement. Below point six was something handwritten.
7. _ _ _ _ _ will make sure to carry a prevention with her at any time, in case of spontaneous activities.
"You little pig!" I smirked sheepishly. "Spontaneous activities?!" This left me speechless. But hey! Since when was this only a woman's business?! Or maybe he was too shy to purchase them by himself? I guessed that was the more valid explanation. At least he intended to repeat our lately actions. Speaking of which, since he was a virgin and I always used a condom before, an idea hit my mind. The pill! It would kill two birds with one stone. No worries about forgetting to bring a protection every time and anywhere, and, and thinking of this let my cheeks glow, feeling him and him only. Just then I detected another piece of paper. How could I overlook it? A few digits were strung together. Was this what I thought it would be? My heart jumped in joy when I took it with my shaky hands. A phone number! This was Oswald's mobile phone number! Sure, he called me once, but the number was suppressed that time. Immediately I saved it. Was it silly to take a pen and draw hearts next to the digits? Oh yes, it was and I didn't care at all! Something else was written on the piece of paper.
Need a key!
The ball pen in my hand traveled along the empty space of the paper. I made a few notes what I had to get. The stuff I thought of before. As for Oswald's request, the key: my father had the duplicate key. Chewing on one end of the pen I asked myself if it was really alright to take it away from him. Then again, Oswald couldn't play the burglar every time he wanted to visit me.
Better quickly get over and done with it! Hopefully my father wouldn't ask too many questions. The sound of the dial tone reached my ear. No one answered. Surely he was still asleep. Or he enjoyed his morning bath. I left a message. "Hey dad, here is _. Ehrm, well... I don't wanna be a pain in the ass, but... ehrm... I need the spare key back. Could you bring it tomorrow afternoon or is it okay for you if I stop by? Thank you. Love you. Bye." Nice, at least one job done. So what next? I had Oswald's number. Did he expect me to call him? Write him a message? Or would it be too intrusive? I could invite him somewhere for lunch maybe. Alright, first, an ordinary message. Showing interest, but nothing pushy.
Hey, Oswald! Are you okay? You were gone after I woke up, so I am a bit worried.
And... sent. Maybe my message was a little bit pushy after all? My deep sigh broke the silence. The only thing I could do was wait now.
Ding-Dong
Knock-Knock
What the-? Well, that was quick. Did this guy wait in front of my apartment door or what?
... ... ... ... ...
Oswald's vibrating cell phone caught his attention. "Oh, Oswald, you know I don't want that modern things on our breakfast table. What is this thing anyway?" Gertrud asked skeptical, turning up her nose at the technical device. She absolutely didn't care for all these new-fangled stuff nowadays. "Please forgive me, mother, it might be important. Don't forget my job keeps me quite busy." "No other woman then?" "There we go again," Oswald wrinkled his nose.
Penguin took his mother's hands in his, giving her a wry smile. "You know you are the only person I trust, mother." "And this detective. You are sure he his trustworthy, my boy?" "Yes, he is mother," he slowly grew impatient. He needed to know if it was her who texted him. "And you are the only woman in my life, mother." She smiled at him, only like a mother could do, and pressed her lips against the back of his hands. "My good boy." She let go of him. "Forgive me, now look at your," Gertrud pointed at his mobile, "thing there."
Oswald did. "Good girl," he thought satisfied. His blue eyes wandered to his mother again and his smile disappeared. The time together with _ _ _ _ _ and her father plopped up in his mind. Reality hit him like lightning. Someday his mother wouldn't be here anymore. Did she really want him to be alone then? Oswald imagined him, his mother and his girl sitting together, enjoying a cup of tea and mother's homemade biscuits. Henry was quite likable, actually Oswald really thought so. Her father accepted him straight away. Why couldn't his mother be a little bit more open minded like him? Why couldn't he and his mother be... normal?
He opened his mouth to say something, but the words were suffocated before they could escape his lips. First, he didn't want to upset his mother and second, this happy-family-image would indicate some romantic feelings towards _ _ _ _ _, and wasn't that something he didn't want to let pollute his heart? "Are you alright?" His mother didn't miss the empty expression on her son's face. "Bad news?" In return she got a weak smile. "Nothing to worry about."
In his room he changed into his usual clothes, although without the vest and jacket. How different her and his bedroom were. Black and purple were the predominating colors of his and even though there was a big window, it always seemed like the sun won't find its way into it. To him. This room felt cold. Always. Or was it because he was always alone in here? And _ _ _ _ _'s bedroom? You entered there and were greeted by a warm and welcome atmosphere. It was colorful, the whole apartment was.
Oswald watched his reflection in the mirror. Lightly he touched the patch on his cheek before he removed it with one tug. He winced a little bit. His cheek was nearly healed. Oswald's bed creaked under his weight. Turning his upper body he let his fingertips glide over the dark sheets and slowly _'s naked body appeared in his mind. The tips of Oswald's fingers prickled, the feeling of her soft skin was still locked in his head. Would she ever wriggle so captivating under him in his own bed? In his imagination strains of her hair were running through his fingers, and he took in the sweet scent of them.
He remembered her tears. Like shiny liquid diamonds they ran down her pretty face. Thinking about that it was his fault that she cried a little bit created a faint sting in his heart. Did she sleep with him because it was her own decision or because she felt like she had to? The thought of she actually did it because she felt forced made him heavy with grief. Wasn't it his own fault by doing this stupid contract though? But her lovely moans, the way she stretched out her body towards him, how her fingernails dug into his flesh in ecstasy... That wasn't a fake, was it? He just had to go to her. This experience from last night, this firework that exploded in him and threatened to shred him into tiny pieces was something only she could give him. And now that he had tasted a piece of paradise, he craved for more. For a brief moment his pain was numbed as she abandoned herself to him. Did she hear what he said before he left? He guessed not. She wouldn't have written a message to him if she really knew he was actually a criminal. A killer. She mustn't find out! He had to be more careful in future. Grabbing his mobile out after a while, Oswald wrote back. "I'm on my way."
It was an unusual hot morning. Especially for Gotham. The more glad Oswald was for only wearing his shirt. Sitting in the sticky car made him even more sweaty. Or was it the knowledge of seeing her again soon that let him feel that way? He arrived finally.
Ding-Dong
No response.
Knock-Knock
No response. Why this girl always had to sleep when I come? „_ _ _ _ _?!" he knocked on the door one more time. Still no response. Oswald decided to call her. The dial tone made him nervous somehow. He thought he could hear a faint ringing inside. "Hi there! At the moment I am-" He cut off the voicemail and tried it again. Annoyed Oswald rolled his eyes after getting the same result. Really? He had to break in again? It started to feel beyond awkward. His hands on his hips, Oswald took a deep breath. After checking if the coast was clear he manipulated the lock of the door for the, what it felt like, hundredth time.
„_ _ _ _ _ _?" Silence. Her mobile phone was on her table. Picking it up, he noticed she didn't even read his message. Oswald put her cell in his trouser pockets. A blanket lay crumpled on her couch. Underneath he found the copy of their agreement and the piece of paper with his mobile phone number on it. And... drawn hearts? What's the point of that? She made more notes.
New lace underwear His face burnt. Why!?
A new outfit For what?
Perfume Again, for what?
The last note made his eyes pop out of his head. Appointment gynecologist For God's sake! Why?
„_ _ _ _ _?!" he yelled once more.
Penguin examined every corner of her apartment. She was nowhere to find. His fingers ran through his black hair, cold sweat was running down his temples. Where was she? Her phone was here... She wasn't... Looking around once more, he suddenly noticed a small amount of blood on the kitchen floor, together with shattered glass. How couldn't he see this before?! Oswald's alarm bells rang. Why did he just leave her last night? Did something happen to her? That Sarah seemed not to be normal, maybe she came and-! Otherwise, he was neither someone who people would call normal, and how did people say? Birds of a feather flock together. Perhaps that's why Sarah was, or she thought she was, attracted to him?
Oswald's heart almost stopped. He had no clue of her whereabouts. Rushing out of the apartment, Oswald met Mrs. Sullivan. Maybe she knew something? The elderly lady sensed his distress. "Is something the matter?" she asked him very kindly. "Did you see _ _ _ _ _? She isn't home and-" Her ringing cackle suffused the hallway. His eyes twitched in rage. Before he could respond anything, Mrs. Sullivan continued babbling, "Don't worry. I saw her going out with a friend." „A friend? Do you know where they wanted to go? " The friendly woman scratched her chin as she pondered. "Well, I heard them saying something about the GCPD. Maybe they went there?"
GCPD?! That... bitch really dared to approach his girl once more despite all warnings? Did Sarah even tell her what he said to her in his ire? That he killed people before and wouldn't hesitate to do it again? There was a possibility they went to the police department, maybe even to Jim, to incriminate him. Oswald would go behind bars, _ _ _ _ _ would be free and Sarah would have her revenge. Sarah was crazy, having that delusional idea of really feeling something for him. Oswald's quiet laughter affrighted the elderly lady a bit. "Is everything alright, my dear?" He looked up again. "Mrs...?" "Sullivan, my boy." "Mrs. Sullivan. Thank you very much for your help. But please excuse me now. I have to hurry."
The way to the police department was filled with the wildest ideas of what was going to happen. Oswald was exasperated. This slut had to pay for this. If you don't want to listen, find out the hard way! The traffic seemed to be heavier than usual. Every minute that passed could end everything. Finally he arrived. The air inside of the building felt stinging cold compared to the sticky air outside. His lungs even hurt when he breathed in. For sure another reason was his anxiety of what could happen any moment. But nobody took notice of him. Several policemen were quite busy with their bagels and donuts, the telephones rang like crazy, the faxing machines sounded without a break, the clacking of typewriters could be heard from every corner, a few dangerous looking thugs were pushed into their cells, their curses and threats didn't impress the police officers at all. Anxious he waited for Jim or Bullock coming over, saying, "You are arrested for suspicion of murder." He could hear the Click of the handcuffs on his wrists already.
Cold blue eyes ran over the inner area. There she was! But alone? _ _ _ _ _ was unharmed. Oswald sighed in relief. The danger was not over yet though. Where was Sarah? Perhaps she talked with Jim? He limped towards his girl, always looking right to left and vice versa. Each step he took let his heart race faster. "Got you!" he seized her arm and turned her around.
