Now that I had an act on the show, I was finally a proper Muppet. I still felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb, but I at least I was part of the Muppet family, even if I was a part that no-one liked.
~::~
Nevertheless, I was super excited and super intrigued a couple of shows later, when Kermit told me that someone in the audience was asking to see me. I fled out of the backstage doors, dashed through the crowds of people and found a small, white cat wearing a pink dress and a furry feather boa.
My cousin Hazel.
I haven't introduced Hazel yet, have I? She's my Dad's sister's daughter and she's the exact opposite of me. To put it simply, she's a posh snob with loads of friends who talks way too much and drives me up the wall
"Oh," I said. "Hi, Hazel."
"Jinx!" she cried. "Oh boy, I couldn't believe it when I saw you on that stage. 'That can't be Jinx' I said, but when I heard you sing I knew it had to be you. I can always recognise your singing. Do you remember when you came to our house for Christmas? And you sang for us then? Oh my, that was remarkable, I tell you…"
And she was off. I can't put anymore because I have to admit I stopped listening. Hazel was a terrible and she never shut up. Once she was going, there was no stopping her.
"…but I'm not jealous, I mean, I would kind of like to perform on stage in front of millions. And it's not really fair that I've never had a proper chance at fame before, when you have…but I'm not jealous."
I raised my eyebrows. "No, of course not," I said.
"Say," she said, having thought of something. "It's not true what's happened to Aunty Lucy and Uncle Mitch and Ebony is it? Because Mummy told me that-"
I held my paw to show that I didn't want her to talk about it.
"I'm afraid so," I said. "That's mostly why I'm here."
"Golly," Hazel replied.
We were both silent. It was the only time I'd ever seen Hazel speechless.
It couldn't last though.
"So, how is it then?" she asked. "Fame, I mean. And of course you've met the other Muppets, how are they? Nice?"
I shrugged. "Yeah, good," I said. "Mostly."
"Mostly?" she echoed. "So…which bits aren't?"
"Well…"
Where do I start?
"Listen Hazel, I need some advice. What do you do if you make friends with someone, but that friend is going out with someone you absolutely despise, but you can't get them in case you break friends with the other person," I blurted out, not making a whole load of sense.
Hazel blinked. "What?"
I sighed. I was about to explain it again, when I heard the familiar tap, tap, tap of heels on wooden floorboards. I turned around.
Miss Piggy.
It was now or never.
"Hazel, she's coming! Quick, how do you get revenge on someone you hate who beat you up a few days ago?" I asked.
"Well that's easy. Here," Hazel handed me her left-over popcorn. "Throw this at her."
I didn't think it would work, but I turned around and yelled "Hey pig-face! I hope you like popcorn!" and flung it right in her outraged face.
The popcorn was coated in toffee, super sticky, brilliant. Miss Piggy fixed me with a vexed glare, popcorn strewn randomly in her hair and on her clothes.
Suddenly, she threw back her head and yelled: "KERMIT!"
Oh sausage rolls. I had forgotten for a moment that her and my boss were a thing. I turned around to realise that Hazel had disappeared.
She had ditched me.
I tried tip-toeing away silently, but I soon felt a hand on my shoulder and heard: "Where do you think you're going?"
I turned and saw Kermit looking pretty stern.
"Heyy…Kermit!" I said, grinning guiltily.
But the expression on his face told me it was hopeless.
Uh-oh, looks like Jinx is in the doghouse! I've had this chapter for a while and I've been waiting ages to write it, so I hope you liked it. Especially the introduction of my favourite character, Hazel.
