Toaxabineh: Hey everyone! Rian forgot to put her own little message in here -_-" I think she's a little bit forgetful! XD But anyways, thanks to everyone who's been reading, reviewing, faving and following! Rian and I appreciate the support!
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Disclaimer's on my prof.!
Sorry for any spelling issues, spellcheck dislikes me -_-"
Enjoy reading!
Jack's brow twitched as Knockout rattled off questions, answering them as best he could without letting on how irritated he was.
"No, I don't feel comfortable around a lot of people, and before you ask, yes, I like having time to myself." He said, not caring in the slightest at how Knockout was now giving him a warning look.
"Take that tone down a notch. This is to help with your PTSD symptoms." The medic retorted irritably, to which Jack snorted.
"You have no clue how to handle a humans mental health."
"I have spent years working with Jackson, so I do not appreciate your lack of confidence in my abilities." Said Knockout, glaring now.
"The other me has schizophrenia. Big difference between him and I."
"I have studied on other humans as well." He added, seeming to 'puff' up a little. "I know what I'm doing. If you would simply cooperate-"
"But I'm fine! I never asked for help!"
"You still need it." He commented dryly, overlooking Jack's answers, to which he had logged into his memory. "After that fiasco with Silas, I'd rather not take my chances. Now, are you easily startled by loud noises?" Knockout continued, to Jack's annoyance. The teen groaned, head falling down as he smacked a hand to his forehead.
"For the love of- no, not usually."
"Alright, now-"
"I'm not doing this scrap anymore!" Jack said finally, throwing his hands down. "If you want to look at anyone's head, I think it should be Silas'!"
"I have already reviewed Silas before, and he is of good mental health." Knockout replied, left optic twitching. Jack stared at him blankly for a moment, then,
"That has to be a joke, right?" The youth said, his expression one of disbelief. "Silas runs a military group of humans and fights alongside giant alien robots against more alien robots, and I'm the one who's possibly mentally unstable?!"
"You aren't unstable, Jack." Knockout retorted sharply. "I'm doing this because everyone, myself included, is worried about you! We worry about why one so young is suffering PTSD!"
"It's none of your business! Not yours or anyone else's on this ship!"
"Why is it so bad if we care?"
"Because it's weird! No one cares!"
Knockout frowned.
"What do you mean? Of course people care-"
"No, they don't! It isn't natural!" The teen had turned now, jumping down from the low table he had been sitting on. Knockout almost missed him when he made a run for the door, careful that his grip wasn't too tight on Jack when he snatched the teen from the ground. "Frag it Knockout, put me down!" Jack shouted at him, glaring daggers into the medic.
"Not until you listen to what I have to say."
"I don't need any help, Knockout. I don't want any."
"And I know that, but I want to help you. Megatron wants you to have help, June does, Silas does, everyone! All you have to do is talk, nothing else."
"I don't want anyone helping me, especially you! And as far as Megatron and the others are concerned, they can shove it up their tailpi-"
He was flicked on the head.
"Ow!" Jack exclaimed, grabbing his head. "What was that for?!"
"There is no need for such language, especially not in my medbay." He scolded.
"Well excuse me, but I'm not exactly happy!"
Knockout sighed.
"Look, just...try it this once? Please?" He decided to pull out the big guns. "I promised Miko and Raf I would help you." At the mention of his two friends, Jack's face lost almost all of its anger, his tone dropping down to a low.
"They know?" Jack asked, voice barely above a whisper.
"They always knew, Jack. Your 'attacks' aren't subtle. They don't like seeing you so scared, Jack."
Jack looked way, feeling guilt wash through him. How could he have been so obvious about it? He was supposed to be a pillar of strength for his friends, not a liability! Dammit, where did he go wrong? If they had know for awhile, why hadn't they said anything? Were they ashamed of him too, like his mom and the bots? They couldn't be, they couldn't know! He thought he had hidden it so well...
Knockout frowned when he saw Jack zone out, and gave him a light shake.
"Jackson, it's fine. You don't have to continue keeping up this facade."
"But...but I don't need help."
Yet Jack didn't look to sure now.
"Everything is going to be fine." Knockout comforted, placing the teen back down on the table. "It isn't wrong to want help Jack. Everyone needs it at some point in their lives, and you are no different."
Jack frowned.
"But I shouldn't need it. I'm supposed to take care of Miko and Raf, at least until we can get home..."
"You do need it. More so than Raf or Miko. You spend so much time trying to make them comfortable and assured, that you yourself have doubts. You're exhausted, and it's only a matter of time before it catches up to you." Jack sighed, burying his head in his hands. Knockout took it as a cue continue. "All I want is to talk. Sometimes just talking to someone can help more than anyone could imagine."
"About what?" Jack murmured. "I'm wasn't the most social person in school..."
"And that's why I'm sure talking will help you."
Jack didn't answer straight away, looking at his shoes awkwardly. After a long moment...
"Fine. Just this once." Jacks eyes flickered around briefly before finally focusing on the medic's faceplates. Knockout sat down in a large chair fit for one his size, and crossed his arms as he prepared to listen. "I've...There's always been a lot of responsibilities on me." Jack started, a flush coming to his cheeks. "Ever since my dad...left...mom's tried to keep me busy with school and then work. I think she's afraid I'll turn out like him."
He glanced at KO. The mech didn't say anything, only listened, so Jack hesitantly continued. "Then with the bots...I mean, they're my family, I care about them all more than anything, but sometimes I feel like they...like they look at me and don't see a sixteen year old. It's like they look at me and see an adult. And then there's Miko and Raf...they look to me to do the right thing. The bots expect me to be an example to them, being the oldest and most responsible." Jack gave a sound of frustration, running a hand through his hair. "And frag it, I never asked for any of it! I never asked to work a job, I never asked to become a second guardian for Miko and Raf, I never asked for anything! They expect me to do all of it, without complaint. And if I try to have even a little fun, then I'm the 'irresponsible' one, and I'm reprimanded for it! It doesn't matter that I'm sixteen and supposed to have at least a little enjoyment now and then!"
"When did the PTSD end up showing?" Knockout asked softly. Dark eyes flickered to the mech, surprised at the sudden sound of his voice, then he looked away once more.
"I've...I guess I've always had it. Since I was little because my dad-...well, because of my dad. But the attacks didn't really start until I got involved in the war."
"Do you think there's a reason for that?"
Jack shrugged.
"After my dad, I would shy away from any physical contact, but that was it. The war involves loud sounds like blaster shots and explosions, and I guess I just...associate that with protecting Miko and Raf, with running..."
Knockout grimaced sympathetically. "Does it have nothing to do with the M.E.C.H. of your world?" Jack flinched, making the mech regret bringing it up so soon. "Sorry, I know it's too soon for me to be asking-"
"It's fine." Jack interjected, eyes returning to the mech. "M.E.C.H didn't help, but it was too recent for me to tell if it's changed anything really."
"I...see." Knockout replied, feeling pity for the boy before him. He was too young to have gone through as much as he did. Too young to have such weight forced onto his shoulders. He cleared his voice modulator, a human habit he had picked up before resuming to speak. "So...how recent is 'recently'?"
Jack pursed his lips in thought.
"Mm...five months? Six? Seven at most."
Knockout would've paled if he were capable of doing so.
"Not long at all..."
"I managed a fast recovery, though. Ratchet and my mom worked together to ensure I had as quick a healing process as possible."
A short nod.
"No muscle spasms? Cramps? Do your scars sting?"
Jack rolled his eyes.
"Not anymore. No cramps. And scars always hurt, that's not a good question."
"I swear, you and your counterpart live to try and offline me..." Knockout said with a miniature glare at the teen, whom was grinning at him.
"We do what we can."
"I'm sure you do."
A sheepish look, and the teen shrugged.
"Are we done now?" He asked, placing a hand against his stomach. "I'm getting kind of hungry, so..."
Knockout sighed.
"I suppose."
"Thanks. Now uh...which way is it?"
Knockout chuckled, scooping him up.
"Come on. I'll take you." He said good naturedly, even as Jack squirmed in his hands.
"I can get there myself-"
"Stop being so stubborn."
Jack huffed, settling in for the ride.
Jack had been nearly asleep when he heard the distant echo of voices from the hall. Who would be awake this late? He yawned, then turned back onto his side with the pillow over his head, hoping he could just ignore it and go back to sleep. But he couldn't help but keep wondering what was going on... With a sigh, he stood, padding over to the medbay doors, pressing the button so that they would open for him. The voices got louder and louder as he got closer to the rec room, recognizing most of them. He had to strain his ears hard, trying to listen in to the conversation.
He jumped when there was the slam of metal on metal.
"C'mon, why can't we just ask them?!"
"Because they do not need to be reminded that in their world, we are the enemy!"
That was Megatron speaking now...were they talking about Miko, Raf and himself, Jack wondered. The other voice, who he vaguely remembered belonged to Soundwave, spoke again, sounding painfully anxious.
"I know, but we have to know-"
"We do not." Megatron stated bluntly, cutting off the mech. "If they are our opposites, then there is little we must guess."
Jack frowned. Could they really not just give him the benefit of the doubt and ask?
"It's not important anyway." Said another voice, this one belonging to Knockout. "Why do you even want to know Soundwave? You want to hear how about how evil we all are in their dimension?" He said, despite his own curiosity.
"I'm just saying we should ask!" Soundwave groaned. "What's the big deal?!"
"It's apparently a big deal if you all think you can't ask." The rec room's occupants all jumped in surprise, turning to the newest speaker. Jack stood there, arms crossed, a brow raised at the lot of them.
"What're you doing up?" Knockout asked, surprised and cross looking. "You're supposed to be in bed."
"I was about to doze off when I heard voices. Conversations carry through the halls amazingly well, the metal helps with the echo. So, care to tell me why you all think my friends and I are so weak we can't answer a few questions?"
"We do not think you are weak." Megatron answered, frowning at the thought.
"Well apparently you do, if you think you need to spare our feelings."
"I call it having some consideration." Megatron replied dryly.
Jack rolled his eyes, moving more into the room. "If you have questions, just ask. I'm not going to be offended or anything, just because you're all curious. If you want to know that badly, then I'll tell you what you want to know." The mechs shifted on their feet lightly, unsure if now was the right time. Jack shook his his head, stepping forward. "It's fine." He assured.
Soundwave was the first to ask, perking up, excitement lighting up his face.
"What am I like? Have you met me in your dimension? Does Megatron-"
"One question at a time." Jack interjected, earning a frown from the slim mech. "Yeah, I've met my dimension's version of you. You rarely speak, and when you do, it's only through voice clips that you've recorded of other people. You're almost as deadly as Megatron." At the end, Soundwave threw a cheeky grin at Megatron.
"You hear that? I'm almost as dangerous as you!" He said, to which Megatron scowled, thinking up ways to put the talkative mech to work later. "But wait- are you saying that I don't have a voice?"
Jack shrugged.
"I've heard it once, but only once. It's heavily vocoded."
Soundwave waited for Jack to say more, blinking once as he watched the teen.
But the boy only turned to the others.
"Anyone else ready to ask me a question? Or are you all still not convinced that it's okay to ask?"
"And me?" Said Knockout.
Jack sighed, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly.
"Vain. Very, very vain."
"That's it?" Knockout replied, rather put out. He liked his plating to be shined and buffed, but surely it wasn't much more than that. "If it's because I like to keep myself clean, I would hardly qualify that as being vain."
Jack snorted.
"Oh, no, it's not like that. Once, when Miko, Raf and I infiltrated the Nemisis while all of you were in forced stasis, we climbed up your plating to get to a console. When you woke up and realized I was on the console and that you had handprints all over your plating, you threatened me with a giant drill." Knockout scowled at the thought of his other self, and wondered what Breakdown must have been like. The mech was boisterous to be sure, and liked to have fun, but enjoyed his privacy as well.
"You're sarcastic too." Jack continued, as though he hadn't been interrupted. "And have a thing for shocking people and knocking them out, which is where your name originates from I'm guessing. You also have a thing for racing, and bumping humans off the road."
Another thought clicked though, and the medic eyed Jack precariously.
"What were you infiltrating the ship for?"
Jack winced, smiling sheepishly.
"Well...Megatron decided to try fueling the Nemisis with dark energon, and the ship...sorta went out of control. It put all of you and the vehicons in stasis lock, and the same happened to the bots when they fought the ship. Since me, Miko and Raf are all human, and the ship could only detect Cybertronians, we went aboard to reverse the stasis lock it had put on the bots."
"And in the process awakening every Decepticon on the warship." Knockout summed up, to which Jack nodded.
"Yeah, well." A shrug. "It wasn't anything new, we already have to run from cons all the time."
Knockout sighed, a servo covering his optics briefly as he shook his helm in resignation.
"I swear you three go looking for trouble." He said more to himself than to Jack. "If I turn my back for a klick, you'd probably been under the pede of an Autobot or Primus forbid a Decepticon."
Jack only shrugged.
"We're alive, aren't we?" His gaze shifted to the others. "Anyone else curious?"
"I admit I've been wondering what I'm like." Airachnid said, crossing her arms. Jack winced a bit.
"Well...I don't know how to put it lightly, but...psychotic."
She looked at him seriously, a glare in her optics.
"I was being serious."
"So am I!"
"Are you saying that I'm the one who's insane?" Airachnid asked incredulously, feeling insulted by the very idea.
Jack frowned.
"You're the one who wanted to know, don't get mad at me! You asked!"
Airachnid frowned.
"In what way am I...Psychotic?"
Jack grimaced, debating whether or not to tell her.
"I...don't think you want to know that." He replied vaguely, trying to look past her to see if anyone else was curious.
"You haven't answered my question."
"Because you really, really won't want to know."
"If I didn't, I wouldn't be asking!"
Jack sighed, looking at his feet, feeling oddly guilty.
"You...once chased me and my guardian Arcee through a forest, trying to offline her, and you wanted to mount my head on a wall."
There was a pause, then-
"I...what? That's impossible! I would never..." She said to herself, thinking that Jack must have been joking with her, or trying to hurt her but...he wasn't the kind of person to do that. And she knew he wouldn't make that kind of thing up.
Jack grimaced to himself.
"Told you that you wouldn't like the details."
Airachnid nodded hesitantly, optics downcast.
"I've tried to kill you?" Airachnid asked softly, shaking her helm in disbelief.
"Yeah...you like to hunt indigenous species. On Earth, that means humans."
"Scrap..."
Jack turned his gaze to Megatron, hoping to take all of here attention off of poor Airachnid.
"Are you curios about yourself?"
"...No." Megatron answered shortly. He turned to face his soldiers, giving each of them a look. "All of you, go back to your assigned tasks."
"But I haven't asked yet-" Breakdown started, only to receive a glare from his Lord.
"Back to work."
Breakdown huffed, but did as told.
Jack for one was relieved that he didn't have to mention what had happened to the Breakdown of his world. Airachnid didn't need to feel worse than she already did. Telling them that she had dismembered him wouldn't help, nor would informing them that Silas had placed himself inside of Breakdown's reassembled corpse, the result being a Frankenstein monstrosity.
Jack shook those thoughts away.
"So, no more late night conversations, right? I can go to bed?"
"It is not like we meant to wake you." Said Megatron, turning his back to the teen. "Go back to your room."
Jack only hummed tiredly, turning and leaving the room, his exhaustion making him stumble.
Raf hadn't known what to expect when he'd woken and stumbled into the rec room. Imagine his surprise when he'd found it almost completely empty, with only knockout watching a screen.
"C'mon, ask her already...!" Knockout whispered urgently, rocking on the pedes of his feet.
Raf frowned, puzzled.
"Knockout?"
"Ah!" Knockout cried out, stumbling forward and slamming into the console controls, hard. He then fell down to floor, hitting the ground face first.
Raf jumped, and hurried forward.
"Are you okay?!"
The medic got to his feet swiftly, using the console to lift himself up. Raf blinked when every screen in the room was filled with the same video, a man kneeling down to a woman with a ring in his hand. "No, no no!" Knockout shouted, freaking out. Raf blinked
"Are you watching...soap opera's?"
"No!" Knockout said defensively. "I was watching a monster truck rally before you came in!"
Raf giggled.
"That's what my papá always says too." Knockout embarrassment came off in waves, as fingers rapidly pressing down on buttons.
"Where's the fragging off button on this thing?!" Raf giggled again and crawled up Knockout's plating to the console. He jumped on the off switch, effectively turning off the screens. "You saw nothing." Knockout stated in a warning tone, pointing a finger at him.
Raf only grinned.
"Of course." He said, trying to hide his smile. Knockout scowled, looking away. If a Cybertronian could blush, then Knockout would be even redder than he already was.
