Save the Writer! Ch11

Wolfie: "Ah shit!"

Miku: "What?"

Wolfie: "I just remembered I forgot the disclaimer!"

Miku: "Oh well, you don't really need one."

Wolfie: "Yes I do."

Miku: "Why?"

Wolfie: "Because... I dunno, but I'm having one!"

Miku: "Fine..."

DISCLAIMER: Wolfie-sama/Der Blaue Wolf/Satoru Klein does not own Vocaloid or any associated songs, Yaoi (of any type), Fangirls (again, of any type), D&D, Yuri, 4chan, Hentai or any associated websites/literature/etc, Japan, Mist, Light, Star Wars, the Internet, Ninjas, Keys (well, not all keys), Trolling, Plot Holes (other than his own), Megaphones, Len (Rin owns him), Yu-Gi-Oh the abridged series, PRIMARCHS (both of which I rip the jokes off, kinda), Dragon Ball, Leeks, Toys of an adult nature, Steamrollers, Monty Python, 'This is Why,' Acidity, Continuity, Tales of Symphonia, Batman, Self-Destruction Mechanisms, Spacships or any Sanity. All of the above belong to the appropriate parties. The characters Misty, Lumi and Chewy are each representative of a real-live person, who has permitted their character to be tortured by Wolfie, and their characters are not fully representative of themselves.

Wolfie: "There, all done."

Miku: "Good, now can we get back to the inter-chapter private time. We haven't *censored* since before this story started."

Wolfie: "Sorry Miku, but we're starting the story now."

Miku: "Damn!"

Wolfie: "Okay guys, from the top..."

Everybody hurries to their positions.

Wolfie: "Action!"

Kaito: "So, Wolfie, you own your own private space ship?"

Wolfie: "Yeah, cool isn't it?"

Kaito: "One might almost call it badass."

Silence.

Meiko: "Kaito dear, please can you work on your jokes."

Miku: "I don't get it."

Wolfie: "What's the ship's name Miku dear?"

Miku: "Oh..." A look of horror crosses her face, "He did not just..."

Wolfie: "He did... but before we get caught up in another ridiculous argument, how about we get on board and go kick ass?"

Miku: "I'm in!"

A door opens in the side, and the group hurry on board.

Wolfie: "I'll take the main wheel! Misty, Lumi and Chewy, man the guns! Miku, you know what to do!"

Miku: "Yes Satoru-kun!"

Lumi: "Very well."

Misty: "You ordering me around? Oh well, I'll live."

Chewy: "WAAAH!"

Luka: "What about us?"

Wolfie: "Ah, I have something special for each of you..."


Aboard his flagship, the 'Intense Yaoi,' Derrick stands surveying the fortress that his enemies have fled into.

Derrick: "DESTROY THEM! THEY MUST NOT BE ALLOWED TO LIVE! Once Wolfie is dead, then we can take over this fic-zone!"

Yaoi Fangirl Pilot: "Then why didn't we kill him before hacking into his laptop?"

Derrick: "...I didn't think of that..."

Alarms ring loudly throughout the ship.

Derrick: "What? What's happening?"

Pilot: "An unidentified ship is approaching us from the direction of the fortresse!"

Derrick: "Bring up a visual!"

A screen shows the ship: a gigantic thing of blue. One the top was Miku, holding up a sign reading 'Hi Derrick!'

Derrick: "Concentrate all fire on that ship!"

Countless weapons turn towards the 'Supreme Badassery' and the girl standing on top of it and the guns fire.

Derrick: "Taste our fire-power! Wait... she's changed her sign!"

Miku holds up a new sign, reading 'How do you like my latest song: 'Only My Railgun?'"


Miku: "How do you like this?" Points a massive railgun at the sky, and fires. Through dramatic convenience, the shot destroys all the incoming fire, and takes out a line of eight Y.O.F.A.G. ships. "Pity that's only one shot..."

Wolfie: Speaking through the ship's comms system, "Miku, time to change to move to stage B!"

Miku: "Okay!" Runs back inside the ship.


Derrick: "How's the damage?"

Pilot: "Eight ships wiped out. Debris scatter badly damaged another six."

Derrick: "Damn! But we still have the upper hand!"

Pilot: "More craft detected leaving the main ship!"

Four spacecraft leave the main ship. One in the shape of a steamroller, only with massive wings, and a spiked roller. Another a rocket in the shape of an ice cream cone. The third, a huge tuna. Finally, a mecha leaped from the ship.

Derrick: "My yaoi! It's a Miku Hachune mecha!"

Wolfie: "Yes, or as we call it, the Micha."

Derrick: "Wolfie?"

Wolfie: "Oh, don't worry, this is just a projection of my voice. I'm not standing there ready to kill you. I don't need to be. Miku will kill you for me."

Derrick: "Shit..."

Wolfie: "That would approximate your situation right now, yes."

Derrick: "Hang on, this is out of your fic-zone, how are you messaging me?"

Wolfie: "Oh, sorry, plot inconsistency..." Voice stops in a puff of continuity.


Dodging around the copious firepower of the battlefield, the three tiny ships fly. The Micha is flying as well for the record.

Miku: "Luka, how do you like your tuna ship?"

Luka: "It's brilliant, a bit short on space with Gakkun in here as well, but that's okay, he's nice and cuddly!"

Miku: "It looks like Rin and Len are enjoying theirs too." The skyroller, or whatever you want to call it, crashes through a daring ship which had tried to stop it. It failed.

Luka: "But the 'Ice Cream Cone of Death' isn't getting very far."

Kaito and Meiko's rocket is under constant fire.

Miku: "Well, we do need a distraction, anyway, it's time to go kick some ass!"

Luka: "Sure!"

The Micha flies quickly towards the enemy ships. It fires leeks from what appear to be shoulder-mounted rocket launchers. The leeks explode on contact with the ships. The Micha then draws two more leeks, and flies up to one ship, slicing it in two with the leeks. Yes, they're blunt, so that shouldn't work, but do you want to tell Miku that?

Miku: "Screw realism, I have..."

Stop with the LittleKuribo references, please.

Miku: "You do it lots."

Yes, but I think we've kinda overdone it by now. Unless you're about to have Brooklyn Rage, or summon the executive producer, which would both help right now.

Miku: "I don't think so."

Right, well in that case, can we get on without the LK references?

Miku: "Oh~ I suppose we could."

Miku pilots her mecha directly towards the 'Intense Yaoi.' She fires off a volley of yaoi-seeking-leeks, striking the ship. The ship begins to plummet, but from it leaps a solitary machine. The new mecha flies towards her.

Derrick: Shouting really loudly from his mecha, "You may have destroyed my ship, but face the 'Knight of Yaoi!'"

Miku: "Seriously, could you not come up with a better name?"

Derrick: "Hey, I'm working on a budget here!"

Miku: "Could you really not afford three seconds for a better name?"

Derrick: "Time is money!"

Miku: "No it isn't. I'm spending time arguing with you, and it's not costing either of us anything apart from sanity!"

Wolfie: "Actually, he may have a point."

Miku: "Wolfie, shut up or it's the couch!"

Wolfie: "Are you determined to make that a catchphrase?"

Miku: "Yes goddamnit!"

Derrick: "Anyway, maybe we should fight."

Miku: "We could, or I could let Luka attack you from behind."

Derrick: "What?" Turns around, but Luka isn't there, "She's not..." Turns back in time to see Miku stab at his machine.

Derrick dodges, and slashes at Miku with a sword he drew from somewhere. Miku fires her leek rockets, which Derrick cuts through. Her then fires rockets of his own, which Miku dodges, causing them to collide mid-air.

Miku: "Why are you even doing this? What does filling Wolfie's fic-zone with Yaoi gain you?"

Derrick: "You don't understand! He slams yaoi fangirls point blank! He bring this on himself, we must rid the Internet of his kind!"

Miku: "You may have a reason, but you think that's a good enough excuse to kill him?" Flies towards Derrick, ready to swing her leeks.

Derrick: "What does your opinion count? In this fic-zone, you are merely a creation of his! You don't even exist! You're just a delusion!" Blocks Miku's leeks with his own weapon.

The two push with their weapons against each other, sparks flying.

Miku: "A creation? A delusion? Yes! I am those. But I'm something else too!"

Derrick: "What have you fooled yourself into believing you are?"

Miku: "Wolfie's Waifu!" Kicks Derrick's machine, which flies backwards. She flies up, preparing to impale him with her leeks.

The sound of metal breaking resounds, as a machine is run through.

Miku: "How..." Looks down, to where Derrick's sword has run through her machine, "...can this be?"

The Micha explodes.

Bis Bald

BW