Author's note: Hi guys! Thanks for reading, it's been great and I think I might be getting to the end of this soon (I plan on writing a sequel though). If you want more awesome fanfics for TMI check out angelcarstairs4679 who's been very supportive of me and totally great, thank you!

Chapter 11.

I wake up with my heart pounding in my chest and I don't even realise that I'm screaming until Gabriel comes running. Now I dream everytime I fall asleep. Jonathan is always there, torturing me. Killing me. I don't know how many times I've died the last few weeks. He doesn't tell me much either. Mainly repeats the stuff about our father. I still haven't told Gabriel and the others about what Jonathan did tell me though. I just feel like I shouldn't. I realise I'm still screaming when Gabriel starts shaking me. He's screaming too.

"Ira!" he yells. "Stop! I'm here, Ira."

"Gabriel?" I ask, even though I know that it's him. That's another thing that's bothering me. Gabriel almost always ends up sleeping in my bed now, it's just easier that way. I'm still mad at him though. He hasn't given me a satisfactory explanation for lying, at least not about his uncle, all he said was:

"He did have a stroke. He just didn't die." I sigh at him, thinking back at the last few weeks. At least I've gotten closer to the other Shadowhunters. Especially Clary, she's really cool, but she's kind of embarrassed that I've been dreaming about her.

"Yeah, it's me." Gabriel says, breaking me out of my reverie. He's holding me, stroking my back. I want to cuddle with him, but instead I push him away.

"You should go." I say. "I'll be fine."

"No you won't" he says. "He'll just be back as soon as you fall asleep."

"I can handle it." I say and he sighs. He gets up and leaves without another word. After he leaves, I fall back asleep almost instantly.

"Hello, little sister." Jonathan says, smirking at me. We're inside a chamber, with all kinds of instruments. I know what they're for, he's taken me here before.

"Jonathan." I say, knowing what is to come. I'm in my underwear, and I'm actually happy about it. The first time I was in my underwear I was horrified, but then he started having me naked, doing the most horrible stuff imaginable to me. So I'm happy I'm wearing something. I'm not so happy about the fact that I'm strapped to some sort of weird table though.

"Why so formal sister?" he asks, smirking. He's always smirking, with his black snake eyes sparkling. I hate him, I really do. How can he be my brother?

"Get me off this table and into some clothes, maybe I'll be more pleasant." I say, looking down at myself. I'm dirty, I'm always dirty in these dreams. I don't know why.

"Tell me where you are, and I will." he promises.

"Promises, promises." I say, smirking back at him. "What will happen once you find out where I am? What do you want? Like really want, no more crap about reuniting family. If you gave a crap about family, you wouldn't be doing this."

"Look, little sister-" he begins, but I cut him off, boldly.

"No more little sister either. Call me by my name."

"Okay, Seraphina." he says, smirking. I'm slightly annoyed by the use of my real name but I guess it will do. "First, I told you. We will come get you. Unless you're somewhere where you may be of use to us. Second, I also told you. It is all about family. Maybe not the typical family reunion, but all Valentine wants is to bring us back together." he says, looking dreamy.

"Valentine?" I ask, feeling slightly horrified. And for once, he looks slightly horrified as well. "Valentine is our father?" I ask again when he doesn't answer.

"Look, you little bitch." he snarls. "If you tell anyone about him, I will find you and kill you for real."

"I wasn't going to tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone much. I didn't even tell them your name."

"Tell who?" he asks. "Where are you?" I shouldn't tell him. I really shouldn't tell him. But... he hasn't tortured me yet. And I really don't feel like it, besides, I'm finally finding out some things.

"I'm in New York." I say.

"Which New York?"

"The one in our world, brother." I say.

"You might actually be of some use there..." he says, smirking. "Who are you staying with?"

"I'm alone." I lie.

"No. You can't possily expect me to believe that you got here by yourself."

"Does it matter?" I ask. I don't want him to know about Gabriel.

"Yes." he says, looking bored. Obviously, he doesn't think it matters. "Are you at the Institute?"

"No." I say. "But I've been there a couple of times." That seems to be good enough.

"Fine." Jonathan says. "You can tell me exactly where you are next time. Next time, you will also report to me on what's going on at the Institute." Then he leaves my head and I sleep for a long time, with no dreams at all.

For once, I wake up peacefully, with the sun shining through the window. I'm startled to see Gabriel sleeping next to me though. I punch him in the side.

"Ouff." he opens his eyes and glares at me. "What was that for?"

"I told you to leave, damn it!" I yell.

"I was afraid you'd have more nightmares" he says. "But you didn't, did you?"

"No, I didn't." I say, and it isn't quite a lie because it wasn't quite a nightmare. "And even if I did, I still wouldn't want you here! I told you to go!"

"Why do you keep pushing me away?" he asks, the hurt clear on his face. "I've apologized and explained plenty, why isn't it enough?"

"Gabri-" I begin, just to be interrupted.

"No, don't answer that by the way." he says. "Maybe it's best you go stay at the institute for a while. I'm sure they'd take you in."

"But... aren't they leaving for Idris soon?" I ask, confused.

"I suppose you'll go with them then." he says, turning away, walking away. I can't let him.

"No." I say. "I want to stay here with you. I'm sorry about how I've been, it's just been very difficult dealing with everything lately, you have to try to understand that. I know that I'm not eing fair towards you, I just really need some time right now, okay?"

"Of course." he says, still not looking at me. "You have all the time you need."

"Then look at me."

"I'm tired of looking at you. I'll go now, see you at breakfast." he says and then he leaves. I gape at the door. Can't he see that I'm trying? I really wish I could tell him more about Jonathan. Maybe then he would understand. But I can't. I need to keep this a secret. Valentine's my father... I contemplate the thought for a while. But that means... that means that Jace and Clary are my other siblings. But Jonathan said that Jace isn't our real brother, what does that mean? Is Jace adopted? I have to find out more about Valentine, I really do. Maybe Gabriel will tell me. I heard Valentine's been causing a lot of trouble anyway, so maybe he'll just assume I'm curious.

"I'm sorry. That was unfair." I jump, I hadn't even noticed him coming back in. But now he's standing in the doorway, staring at me and I just want to kiss him.

"Come here." I say, tired of being away from him, tired of keeping my distance. I need him, there's no point in pretending I don't. It's not over and we both know it. He comes towards me and lies down next to me. I put my head down on his chest and relax. I can hear his heartbeat and I just want to stay like this forever.

"Gabriel?" I say though, because I still have questions, even if I don't want to talk.

"Yeah." he says with his eyes closed.

"Tell me more about Valentine." when I say that, he opens his eyes and stares at me.

"Why?"

"I'm curious." I lie. "I don't know anything about this world, or what's going on. I just know that there are a lot of problems with Valentine right now."

"It's probably best asking Jace about him, even though I doubt that he wants to talk about it."

"Which is why I'm asking you. We both know Jace wouldn't tell me anything, not really."

"I guess that's true." Gabriel says. "Thing is, I don't really want to talk aout him either." I look at him and I see how much pain he's in. I guess if it was me I wouldn't want to talk about it either.

"It's fine." I say. "I understand, you don't have to tell me."

"I'll tell you one thing though." he says, looking me straight in the eye. "You never want to meet him." I shiver and look down, not able to tell him what I'm thinking. That I have to meet him. I have to see for myself.

In the afternoon, I tell Gabriel that I'm tired. That I need a nap. That's not true, but I need to talk to Jonathan so I take some of the sleeping pills I got months ago and never used. They work and within half an hour I'm in my dream with Jonathan.

"You're asleep kind of early."

"I needed to see you." I say. He looks suspiciously at me.

"Why?"

"I want you to tell me more about our father." I say.

"Fine." he says. "Tell me what's going on at the Institute and then I'll tell you about Father."

"There's not much going on, really." I say, telling the truth. "Everyone is going to Idris soon, even Clary."

"Interesting. Have you told them?"

"Told them what?"

"About me? About you?"

"No. I haven't told anyone who you are. Or who I am."

"Good, little sister." he says, smirking. "I don't understand why though."

"Because I want to know everything myself before I tell them." I say. "I don't know them enough to trust them."

"Good, you shouldn't"

"I don't trust you either, Jonathan."

"I never told you that you could."

"I guess we're on the same page then." I say. "Now tell me about Valentine."

"What do you want to know?"

"Why did he start the Uprising?" I ask. "How did it start?"

"It started with Circle." he begins. "Valentine knew how corrupt the Clave was. They still are. They associate with Downworlders, spare them even though the world needs to be cleansed." he continues for some time, but the speech sounds rehearsed, like he's just repeating things he's heard.

"You said you couldn't tell me about my mother, what about your mother?" I ask, wanting to find out more about Jonathan as well. He tenses up.

"My mother abandoned me. She hated me from the day I was born. I hate her as well. She ran from us, she was pregnant with Clarissa at the time so we lost her as well without even knowing it. You want to keep far, far away from her." he says with a bitter look on his face. I stay quiet about Jocelyn being in the hospital and how Clary's worried sick about her. I know it would just make him angry. Or maybe he would do something stupid.

"I'm sorry." I say instead. He snorts.

"I don't need your pity. I have my father, he's all I need."

"Then what do you want me for?"

"I just want you, Seraphina." he says and I feel a chill creeping up my spine.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, even though I already know. He doesn't answer me, instead he leans forward and kisses me, I gasp and then I'm back in my room, awake. Gabriel's there as well, looking at me.

"You okay?" he asks.

"Yeah, I'm good." I say and smile at him.

"No more dreams?"

"No, I think they're gone."