Not just a thing
Daphne opened the door to the apartment and let out a loud sigh as she removed her shoes. Never, EVER was she going to put on high heels and then decide to take a walk.
After the taxi had gone far enough from Fred she got off, paid the driver and went back home on foot. Most people would call strolling in a dark park after 10 PM a little crazy, but Daphne was so used to the alleys that she knew them better than her own hand.
The cold wind blowing through the trees made her relax, and after walking for several minutes, the adrenalin levels in her blood dropped. Daphne removed the shawl from her shoulders, then looked up at the sky as if she wanted to absorb the stars with her eyes. But there were not stars tonight-just a lonely, shadowed moon.
She was so tired she forgot completely that this wasn't her apartment and made no effort to conceal her coming back. Then suddenly, she froze, feeling a sudden stir in the kitchen. Matt turned on the lights and looked at her.
"You're back." He stated, looking at her messy hair and flushed cheeks "Didn't he give you a ride back?"
"No, I decided to walk." She shook her head.
"Walk?! In this pitch dark? For crying out loud, Daph, that's like a total suicide!"
"It wasn't that bad…" she started, then one of her heels broke and she grabbed the doorframe in order not to fall down. Matt sighed out in irritation and made her sit down on the couch, then removed the blasted shoe and took a disapproving look at her foot.
"You could kill yourself like that, you know." He said, then went to the bathroom to get a bucket of warm water. "Now put you feet in this and hopefully they won't be sore in the morning."
"Thanks. Are…are Shaggy and Velma still out?"
"Yeah. It seems Velma's sister came to town and they went to see her at the Dinkley's. They called to warn us that they might be staying in for the night."
"Oh…" Daphne smiled. Velma's sister, Ashley, came to town once or twice a year, whenever the Peace Corps could spare her. The visits grew shorter by the year and every moment she spent in Coolsville was precious-perhaps she wasn't going to see her sister for the next one or two years since her group was going off to the Philippines to help the victims of typhoons. "I guess it's for the best-they might have worried if they knew I went out with Fred."
"Yeah, they might have." Matt went to make some tea "Scooby is sleeping in their room, don't worry about him."
"Is something the matter? You won't look at me." Daphne seemed concerned.
"It's nothing." Matt sighed "I'm just a little tired."
"Weren't you sleeping?"
"No." he replied shortly "So…you and Fred are not back together, I guess…since he didn't drive you home…"
"You guess right." Daphne took a cup of tea from him "But I don't know whether I should be afraid or relieved that we had dinner tonight."
"Do you wish to speak about it?"
"Only if you'd listen." He sat down on the couch opposite her and rested his elbows on his knees. Daphne rested back on the sofa and sighed, looking at the sealing. "I really don't know what I expected. Perhaps the end of it all. This incertitude…this confusion…It pained me during the last year…before Mystery Inc dissolved. Always fighting…never comprehending our true feelings…forever hiding behind our pain. Your parents divorced, didn't they, Matt?"
"Yeah…" he nodded "Are you saying that it was like divorcing? The breaking up of Mystery Inc that is…"
"Yes. In truth I wasn't hurt because Fred and Velma fought. Everybody was different and disagreement was inevitable. I understood that, but they kept the others out of their fights. Shaggy, and Scooby, and especially me. Fred didn't want me to get involved into whatever arguments he had with Velma because he though that they would ruin me. I never told him I hated that."
"But he was only caring about your well-being, Daphne." Matt felt a sharp pang in his heart as he was saying this "And I think there have been enough reasons for him to think that you wouldn't endure it."
"Yeah-danger prone Daphne. That dreaded nickname I never got rid of. However, it wasn't about protecting me-whenever they liked it or not, Fred and Velma's fights concerned the entire group-we weren't united, everyone kept his thoughts to himself, the pressure and disagreement bottled up and in the end, there was just bitterness and anger." Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, but she wiped them away. "Mystery Inc was like a child, something all five of us created and kept alive…and when we started backing off, it died."
"If you don't want to talk about this…"
"No, I need to tell somebody." Daphne looked at him "I don't blame just Fred for this-none of us had the bravery or strength left to say what was on his mind and it led to the end of everything. Everybody knew it, everybody agreed…we had to change directions. And we did just that."
"So what's the problem then? What's this all about?"
"Freddie thought that I had to continue with him." Daphne said "A little before the problems started, Fred and I…we…had an affair."
"You got together?" Matt raised an eyebrow. Why was she so ashamed of something that the whole world knew would happen sooner or later?
"Yes, we got together. We did what everyone expected. I don't deny it, at first it was great. All the tension, all the problems seemed far away. We wanted to do this for so long, it was a relief after so much danger and fights. Sometimes I had thought it would never happen."
"Sorry to ask you, Daphne, but why didn't you guys do that from the very beginning? I mean, there was chemistry, so…"
"It wasn't about chemistry, that's why. We were just teenagers when we decided about Mystery Ind. There was so much to do-building up a detective agency from scratch, traveling, getting through high school, dealing with our parents-we barely had time for our lives, personal relationships were out of the question. Besides, romantic involvement was dangerous-if any of the villains found out that this was something more than sparks, he would take advantage and then it would be lost." Daphne bit her lip and thought.
"Then we moved out, we became more independent…" she went on "And things suddenly got a whole lot easier. Fred and I were together before we knew it and…it was great at first. It felt like we were two parts of the same soul…but that was short. Soon, the fights began and Fred got distant…cold…and eventually, he stopped noticing me. He didn't do it out of bad heart, I guess that he just stopped loving me. After a while, I stopped loving him as well."
"He just didn't comprehend it yet-that's why he tried courting me right before his wedding. We were so used with each other that he just couldn't accept that we couldn't love each other anymore. It's my fault-I should've stayed away!"
"No." Matt shook his head "That's not true, Daphne. It was your decision to come here and help Velma and Shaggy out. It was your decision to move on. And again, it was your decision to come back on foot tonight. Am I wrong?"
"No, you're not. Truth to be told, I don't know where we might have ended up if I didn't choose to walk away."
"Then? He can't hold you responsible for making your own decisions, right? Your feelings are only yours to manage, Daphne. You are a grown person, nobody has the right to tell right from wrong for you, or tell you what you feel. If you don't know your own heart, who would?"
"I don't know." Daphne rested her head down on the sofa and looked at him "But I feel so bad for what's happening to Sydney and Fred and you…you're all confused."
"You are confused as well." Matt mumbled, avoiding her gaze "It's all about the choices we make, Daphne, not what others do. Fred chose to ignore the present and live in the past-the consequences of that decision are only his to bear. Do you understand?"
"I do." She whispered "You're right, Matt. God, you're right."
"Of course I'm right." He snorted out "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, Daphne. We wouldn't be here if you didn't realize this."
"You think?"
"Hell yeah I do! Listen…" he sighed "If you didn't know how you felt, you wouldn't be here right now. Maybe Fred would have already broken up with Sydney, maybe not, maybe you would have had sex and then you'd feel guilty and…never mind everything. The fact that things are the way they are is a proof that you took a decision on your own head and that's more important than anything."
Daphne got up from the sofa and sat down on the couch next to Matt. Without saying a word she took his hand into hers, rested her chin on his shoulder and closed her eyes tight. Warm tears started dripping down her cheeks and her shoulders shook-she was crying silently, sobbing so quietly that nobody could hear her. Matt didn't know what to do-he put his other hand on hers and closed his eyes as well. They stayed like that God knows how much-it was something that didn't bend down to the will of time. Nobody moved. It was a moment for healing, time to take a break from the confusion, from the riddles and mysteries and drift off.
Finally, Daphne said:
"It's like a river, Matt. A river with a strong current. It pulls you and smothers you and if you try to stay in one place, if you get distracted for even one second, you die. I tried to break up with the past, give up on meat and purple and love and still it all came back to me."
"Because it's not about giving up on past. If you did, you wouldn't be giving up on just your relations, you give up on living."
"Cherish the past, but don't let it interfere with the present, right?" Daphne smiled "It seems so right when I hear it from you."
"No, the moment's just like that." Matt got up and took the tea cups away. "But you did the right thing, telling your thoughts."
"I said it myself-if you keep them to yourself you only suffer."
"Indeed." But as he was about to continue, the phone rang. Matt answered.
"Rogers' home, good evening." He said calmly. "Oh, hello again! Yes, yes, I understand. I'm glad. Thank you very much."
"Who was it?" Daphne asked as he hung off.
"It was the hospital, they wanted to tell me that everything was officially fine."
"The hospital?" Daphne's eyes filled with concern "What happened? Was it Velma? Did anything happen to the baby?"
"No, no, Velma is alright. Don't worry everything is under control now." Matt ran his fingers through his hair "Although it might have not been."
"Why? Matt, tell me what is going on!"
"First I want you to relax. Nothing irreversible has happened." Daphne looked at him anxiously. He took a deep breath. "An hour after you left, I got a call. Sydney tried to take her life."
