Let The Ricks Fall Where They May

Written by Kat_Aclysm
Beta Read by Unlvcrjchick
Rated: - T for language

Disclaimers + Copyrights: This is a work of fanfiction. Rick and Morty is an Adult Swim animated comedy created by Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon.

NOTE:This one came out of nowhere. Chapter 11 was actually finished before 10, I started stagnating over some of the descriptions in 10 and wanted to keep going, and before I knew it, this one was finished first. Tidied for grammar/repeats.


Give 'em hell, turn their heads, gonna live life till we're dead
Give me scars, give me pain, then just say to me, say to me, say to me
"There goes a fighter. There goes a fighter, here comes a fighter."

That's what they'll say to me, say to me, say to me - "This one's a fighter."

- The Fighter - Gym Class Heroes


Chapter 11 – Rickovery

What date is it? What time is it? Something, something, 2001
Location? A fucking hole in the ground!
Look, it's dark, OK? Who cares what dimension it is?


His mind was too cold and much too far away; at least it had finally shut up for once in his life.

How long had he been here now? Rick couldn't remember, but had managed to fight through the desire to fall asleep the entire time. His vision was a blurred haze as he lowered his head and a copious amount of drool trailed down his lower lip and chin. He couldn't feel his limbs anymore, let alone move them. When he heard loud screeching somewhere above him, it only vaguely registered in his mind. He heard it again and it wasn't making sense; those sounds didn't seem like words.

"What a pathetic way to die," he thought to himself, "Spend years of your life murdering bureaucrats... only to survive planetary genocide and... freeze to death inside a fucking hole in the ground..." The only other thought that penetrated his cold-addled mind was Morty's well being and he hoped the little boy was still alive up there on the ledge.

He didn't know. Morty certainly wasn't making any noise and Rick couldn't see him even if he wanted to; it worried him immensely.

Next he heard scraping, scratching, digging, and the sound of metal scraping across rock, over and over. More screeching. There were more sounds and muffled talking. He could hear rushed, padded footsteps as Gresharak's hatchling ran down the length of the den, but she sounded like she was distant and underwater at the same time. He heard her chirping and making all kinds of noises; some of them may have been words, but she was already too far away for him to make any cognitive sense out of them.

"Are you the human known as 'Rick'? Is that really you down there?" An unfamiliar voice echoed down the length of the dirt tunnel.

That was a word he recognized; of course Rick knew who he was. He opened his mouth to respond, but only a loud, stupid, slurry, resonate phonetic came out. He sounded so weak and pathetic; just how far gone was he? This was nothing like being drunk.

"It is all right, Rick. We know you are in there, Lakkarah has just informed us of the situation. We are trying to dig you out. It should not be much longer. Stay where you are, yes?"

A positively stupid instruction; he was literally incapable of doing anything else. Rick lifted his head towards the source of the voice and even in the throes of hypothermia he was still stubborn enough to want to protest. He was suddenly pelted with giant clods of dirt and his retinas were stabbed by intense blinding sunlight. He couldn't move his arm to block it out and snapped his eyes shut in protest, furrowing his brow in pain.

"Ffff..."

Just as quickly as it had come, the light was gone again as a dense heavy warm blanket was thrown over him. He was promptly assaulted by another and then he felt himself being picked up off the ground and moved around at weird angles as somebody tried to remove his pants. Rick used all his effort to make a loud vocal protest; even though he knew they were trying to help, he wanted to object to the violation of his person.

"Stop fighting it. I need to strip off all your wet garments in order to warm you back up. Stay awake if you can manage it because it is very important. Can you hear me? Do you understand? Respond if you can."

Rick made a singular weak grunt in reply, still very much frustrated at the fact that his body just wouldn't respond for him. He wanted to move and get out of there, but he would have to concede to the fact that he was utterly useless for the time being.

"Excellent. That is very good. Keep listening to me, Rick. Focus on every instruction that I give to you. It is imperative that we get you out of here as soon as possible. You are going to be just fine, so try not to worry."

Even through all the haze and slowness, Rick felt incredibly annoyed about that statement. He was being told what to do yet again; nobody told him what to do. He wanted to give them a piece of his mind, but the words just wouldn't come out.

"Is it safe to move him? Is he going to die?"

"Not if we act quickly. I think we have gotten here just in time. Just think, if another hour had passed, he might not be so lucky."

Time: what time was it? Rick could only tell the sun was back out, which meant that the storm must have passed already. He still hadn't heard Morty make a peep, and he was growing increasingly more concerned by the minute.

"How different is he from us? I am not sure how to treat this. What should we do with him? This is the first human I have ever dealt with."

"He is not that different to us from a biological perspective. You might think of him as fragile but I have been assured that humans are robust and incredibly resilient. He has no feathers or wings to speak of but his skeletal structure is similar and his genitals are more or less the same, just smaller. If his condition was not at risk of deteriorating further, I would suggest taking a look to sate your own curiosity." The owner of the voice laughed.

Rick's eyebrow twitched; if he were capable of forming coherent sentences right now, he would have absolutely royally ripped into both of them.

"We need to get him to a warm dry shelter as soon as possible. He needs to be gradually warmed back up and then we can go from there."

"Where does he live?"

"Wait, I know!" Gresharak's hatchling was the only voice he could recognize. "He lives in my neighbor's house. We are part of the northern flock."

"Should we take him to the medic? He might be better suited to deal with this."

Rick protested with a weak, angry sound; that was the last thing he wanted. He couldn't focus his eyes well enough to put faces to the voices, but he knew he already hated these people and wanted to punch them in the face.

"How is his child faring? He did find him again, yes?"

"He's still in the den," Gresharak's hatchling was eager and excited to help now, "want me to get him?"

"If you could. That would be wonderful."

The world around him was quiet again, and then a loud, defiant, ear-piercing scream drowned everything else out. Rick's mind could finally relax again; if Morty was feeling aggressive enough to protest with that much volume and fervor, then he was definitely alright.

"Well, if that is everyone in your traveling party, we shall take care of this one and depart before the weather turns bad again."

Rick felt himself being tilted backwards and then bound up snugly in the blankets that had been thrown over him. He wanted to protest and tell them he wasn't a baby, but he still couldn't get the words out. He gave up and closed his eyes, finding it harder to keep his head up as the desire to fall asleep became more difficult to fight.

"Stay with us, Rick. Try to remain awake as your awareness is very important. I know it is hard but the alternative is worse. Are you still with us?"

Before he could respond, he heard a rushed flurry of feathers accompanied by a harsh landing and loud screechy sobbing. "Oh, how could this happen!? HOW could this happen!? Oh, why did he take my baby girl all the way out here, far away from our home? She could have died!"

That voice was identifiable - Gresharak. "Fucking great..." Rick thought. Was she pissed at him? He hoped not; he had put Morty and her young girl's survival well above his own, and now he was paying the price for it. He wanted to explain his reasoning and to make her shut up. She had always been too loud since he had met her, but right now her screechy voice was being especially grating on his senses.

"The only reason I'm still with him is because of our children. He's going to end up SO single before the end of the breeding season, let me tell you that!" A pause. A tinier, high-pitched chirp not her own. "Thank the stars that you are alright. I am just glad to see you safe, my precious little girl..." More screechy crying.

Well, at least that had answered his question.

"We cannot stay here as we are wasting valuable time. I am glad you got your girl back, but take her home and see to it that she is checked over, just to make certain that everything is fine."

Rick felt a warm hand brush up against the side of his face, and it lingered as it caressed his cheek. He furrowed his brow in protest and tried to turn his head away, not at all appreciating the gesture. The hand tracked along with his movement and he made a pathetic growl in disapproval.

"You are so cold... I would give you a hug to warm you up if I could. You have done so much more today than you could ever know, I just hope you realize that. You... you saved my only baby girl. The flock will not soon forget this, I will make sure of it. We will do everything in our power to make sure you get everything that you need."

Rick gritted his teeth, feeling disgusted; yet another stupid bird person who thought she owed him everything. He had only done what anyone else would have in his situation and because it had felt right. Gresharak was holding his head up now, her warm hand ruffling through his scruffy, dirty, powder-blue hair.

"You are in dire need of a bath. You look like you have traversed the bottom layer of the underworld, which is pretty much what happened, yes? You also smell like compost."

Rick tried to focus his eyes on her, scowling; he had just been dug out of the ground, so how was she expecting him to smell? He closed his eyes again when he discovered that his vision was still far too blurry and uncoordinated.

"You need me to take Morty again for a while, yes?"

"M-mmm-ph..." He managed a short nod as he forced out the reply, not being able to manage much more as two sounds had taken a lot of effort. He wished he could say more and make hand gestures, but he was so tightly bundled up that it wasn't possible. He gave a short huff in his frustration and gave up.

"Carry the hatchlings. I will take this one. Lead the way."

And just like that, the bird person carrying him was up in the air, flapping hard. Although he still didn't appreciate being swaddled up like an infant, the two thick blankets were completely protecting him against wind shear; they had obviously thought about that one. Now that he was finally safe, the desire to fall asleep was almost overwhelming and he couldn't fight it anymore. His head lulled back and he was still, his breathing becoming dangerously slow.

"Rick?"


The first sense to return to him was smell; there was a strong charcoal and wood-fire aroma in the air and although it wasn't unpleasant, it quickly burned the inside of his nose. Next came sound and he heard quick footsteps pacing across a wooden floor. It was too loud and he was already aware enough to be grumpy about it.

"Hey, look. Is he waking up? I think I saw an eyebrow twitch." A youthful high pitched voice that vaguely sounded like a prepubescent male; he didn't have a clue who that one was. "Can I poke him?"

"No. And keep your voice down." A calm monotone voice was momentarily betrayed with firmness - unmistakably Birdperson's. "I have known him many years and I can assure you that it is normal. It is not uncommon to see him make involuntary muscle movements, especially during sleep. Be considerate as he still needs time to rest."

"How can he rest when he is unconscious?" A different male hatchling. "That is stupid."

How many of them were there? Were they watching him? Did he have a captive audience?

"Duh, shut up. Your talking is probably disturbing his unconsciousness." The slightly older male verbally cuffed his sibling. "I have an idea. Talk louder, maybe he will wake up?"

Rick gritted his teeth and growled, wishing they would all just go away.

"He just made a noise!" The little girl's excited voice was high-pitched and grating. It made his head hurt.

"Keep your voices down, all of you." A stern, scolding motherly tone; definitely Gresharak. "I know you want to thank him but I have half a mind to take you all home. Just be patient. You do remember how to do that, yes?"

Rick made another soft groan of protest and wrinkled his brow. He slowly forced his eyes open and stared up at the ceiling, immediately testing his ability to focus his vision. When the two blurry images of Birdperson's roof slowly became one, he was pleased; he was already at three out of five. Now, if only he could get out of the prison of the blankets and get into a nice bottle of whiskey, that would make senses four and five. If he could just do that, he would consider the day to be a roaring success.

Ending up on Birdperson's couch in various states of consciousness and inebriation was becoming habit and he wasn't sure how to feel about it. Before he could entertain that thought any further, one of the hatchlings bounded across the room and was at his side, poking at the blankets around his shoulder.

"Hey, there you go. You are awake!" Another poke. "Can you hear me?" The younger male grinned at him.

"F-fuck off..." Rick hissed, not even bothering to acknowledge him; it was an automatic response without any thought needed whatsoever.

Birdperson rose to his feet and stood at the edge of the couch. "Welcome back, Rick. Although it pains me to see you down like this yet again, I must say that I am incredibly humbled and proud to hear about your act of heroism. The entire community has been talking about what you have done all day."

"H-heroism? That's stu-" Rick's sentence ended in an abrupt coughing fit; his throat hurt and his mouth was far too dry. "I-It's not a fucking comic book..."

"Something like this is very important to the people in my flock, Rick." Birdperson stared down at him, inhaling momentarily as he prepared to explain what was a touchy subject. "I am not sure if you understand the gravity of the situation, but the females of our society are undervalued, sometimes cast aside. The fact that you, a superior male of such renown, went so far out of your way to bring a young, weak, unnecessary member of our flock back to salvation is very compassionate."

Gresharak puffed out her feathers, her expression positively livid. "Unnecessary?! Would you like to take this discussion outside?"

"Salvation? Oh geez, I-I'm... I'm not a f-fucking god. Don't start preaching to me, I don't want any of you stupid feather-brains getting any... a-any funny ideas." He turned his head towards Birdperson and then Gresharak, glaring hard at them. "Stop that! I-I don't wanna hear about your society-hierarchy bullshit... s-stop getting butthurt about it!"

"Sorry." Gresharak stood down again. "How are you feeling?"

"C-cold... and I need a drink." His reply was short, honest, and very blunt. Rick's attention was back on the ceiling now, though he was already back at testing his current capabilities, wanting to know more about his situation. He could feel and wiggle his limbs, though he was still tightly confined in the warm bundle of blankets and he still didn't have a stitch on underneath.

"I am glad you said that," Gresharak replied, "I remembered what you said the other day about apologies and liquor and how it says sorry so much better than words. Is it a part of your culture?" She picked up a bottle of honey-colored liquid and dropped it onto the coffee table in front of him. "Just as you requested, and no seed-wine 'bullshit'." A grin accompanied her words as she watched what would happen.

"Mom!" Her eldest son yelped. "Such language!" He paused. "Wait, does this mean we can say that word now?"

Rick's attention was immediately on the bottle when he heard the base hit the table; amber was his favorite color and his mind was already rabidly craving whatever was inside as it had been far too long since his last drink. He made an attempt at trying to sit up, but felt sharp waves of pins and needles spike through his body, shooting down his limbs. At first he guessed it was a result of moving too soon, but when he began to harshly shiver, he was actually pleased about it; all of these new symptoms were positive signs that his body was well on the way to warming up again. With any luck, the heat in the room would start getting uncomfortable and he could risk leaving the confines of the blankets; he felt utterly ridiculous being bound up.

Birdperson was quick to pick the bottle back up. "This is the last thing he needs right now," he shook his head at the adult female, "you should not have brought this here so soon."

"Aww c-come on, BP... why not?" Rick's voice was pleading and he didn't care if he sounded like a whiny little child as he continued. "Just one shot... m-maybe three? That's all I need. Be a bro a-and... and hook me up, h-huh?" He clenched his jaw shut to keep his teeth from chattering together.

"Not now, Rick."

Much to his dismay, Rick watched Birdperson carry the bottle out of the room again. He didn't care what was in it; he wanted it so bad. He closed his eyes again and growled, frustrated by the fact he had such a psychological dependency on the stuff. He knew that it would grow into physical dependency if he didn't keep it in check and that the booze would probably be his downfall eventually, just like his parents. But it was what it was; he was an irredeemable alcoholic and had to accept the fact. It tasted so good and he liked what it did to him.

He was far, far too sober.

"I'm sorry about that." Gresharak told him quickly, breaking him out of his thoughts. "Does that mean I need to get you another?"

"Yes." Another automatic response. Spoken like a true alcoholic.

"Maybe later. It is time for us to go." Gresharak chuckled in reply. She gently nudged her young girl towards him as if trying to encourage her. "What did you want to say to the human, Lakkarah?"

"Umm..." The little girl became suddenly shy and leaned against her mother's legs for support. "Thank you for saving me. You were... really brave."

Rick shrugged his shoulders as much as he could as he turned his head back towards her. "It's not a problem," he scowled suddenly, his expression turning deadly serious, "so w-what did you learn?"

"Not to go running off..." She clutched at the fabric of her mother's robe, shy and entirely uncertain about what to do. She also seemed incredibly ashamed of herself.

"And?" Rick emphasized the singular word with a dip of his left eyebrow, glaring hard at her.

"And?" The little girl blinked at him, confused. She was becoming more and more upset by the second. Her next response was barely a whisper. "And, um... to tell my parents wherever I go...?" She sniffled, already on the verge of tears.

"Smart kid," it didn't come out kindly, "n-now get the fuck out of here and don't ever pull that shit ever again."

Gresharak picked the girl up and headed for the door. "Whenever you are ready, come back over and get Morty. My spirit mate is busy giving him a bath." Her attention was on both of her male hatchlings and she chirped at them. "Come, boys. We are leaving."

With that, the room was empty again and Rick was finally alone with his thoughts. He considered the whole thing to be entirely stupid; although most of it had been his fault to begin with, he couldn't control the events that had followed and managed them as best as he could. He wasn't a hero at all, and the bird people were delusional if they even considered it. He knew one thing for certain; he would probably never leave Morty out of his sight or unsupervised ever again.

Hard regret was the next thing to hit him; the spiky-haired man had been so irrational about finding his grandson again that he had completely abandoned his backpack in the metalworker's shop, along with all of his blueprints and the innards of his portal gun. He had also been stupid enough to pack in more than half of his useful equipment from the workbench and wanted to kick himself over it. He didn't have a clue how well it had all fared in his absence but didn't hold very high hopes for it; if everything was destroyed or damaged from the storm, then he had no idea how to proceed. He wasn't even certain if he had enough components leftover to start again if he had to.

There wasn't even any point trying anymore.

Within the hour, Rick could finally feel his fingers and toes. After another hour had passed, he was sitting back up and finally freed from the restraint of the blankets. He set one of them across his lap to cover his legs and wrapped the other around his lower abdomen. Although he was unhappy about still being completely naked, at least the blankets were doing everything to conceal the fact.

Now that Rick was looking far more alert, Birdperson took the opportunity to take care of him. He covered up the sutures on his back with fresh gauze padding despite his protests, and then brought him cups of tea in order to warm up his core again. Rick felt queasy and uncomfortably distended after finishing off two of them and wouldn't even consider touching the third.

"F-fuck, don't make me do this anymore, BP." Rick protested as he glared at the next cup of tea waiting for him on the coffee table. "No more will fi-" He ended the sentence with a rumbling burp, but it didn't do anything to lessen his discomfort.

Birdperson sat next to him. "I am glad to hear it. When you are feeling better, there is hot soup on the stove."

Rick pulled a face of pure disgust, wanting to gag at the suggestion. "Ugh, maybe later... that stuff is... i-is doing bad things to me. Haven't you got anything else?"

"I do, but you have very clearly stated that you do not want to eat bugs," Birdperson shrugged, "or worms."

"So... when are you going to give me the bottle back?" His mind had returned to the booze; he had a vicious craving and it was driving him insane.

"I thought you said that you were full?" Birdperson raised his left eyebrow ever so slightly.

Rick offered him his best toothy grin. "Nobody's too full for a drink. Now give? Give. Give, give, give."

"Give? You should give it some more time," Birdperson told him, "it is always better to err on the side of caution. I suspect you are still warming back up and alcohol is not something that you want to administer to somebody who is cold."

"No, y-you got that all wrong, whiskey warms you up!" Rick objected. "It warms you up! UP!"

Before either of them could say any more, there was a loud knock at the door. Birdperson rose to his feet and opened it, only to stare at a particularly tall and muscular feathered female standing on the other side.

Birdperson simply looked her up and down, his expression remaining stoic. "Can I help you?" He said after a moment; he had absolutely no idea who she was.

"This is where the human known as 'Rick' lives, yes?" She peered around the feathered male, her attention immediately glued to the spiky-haired human on the couch. "Ah, there you are. I am glad to see you again. Can I come in?"

Birdperson saw no reason to deny her, so he opened the door entirely and stepped aside to get out of the way.

As the strange female came in through the door, she held up Rick's backpack and a small leather satchel, her attention still hard on him. "You left these behind. I thought you may have wanted them back, considering how you kept emphasizing how important they were."

Rick simply stared back at her, wide-eyed and absolutely astounded. A happy grin came over him in the sudden realization that all his abandoned possessions had survived after all. "Oho, fuck yes!" He wanted to spring off the couch and grab the bag, but he remembered that he didn't want to risk getting up just yet. He also realized that he was still naked and pulled the blanket higher up over his torso, making sure that the most private part of his anatomy was still well obscured from view; as much as he enjoyed that aspect of himself, he didn't like showing it to anyone if he could help it. "Bring 'em over here! I-I wanna see what survived."

"Everything did," she began to explain, "as soon as you ran off, I made absolutely certain that it would all be safe for you when you finally came back, but you never did..." A sad expression came over her face and she shook her head. "When the storm cell hit, I thought you and your hatchling were done for. But after the storm was over, people began to talk and I wanted to see it for myself." She set both bags down in front of him. "So are the stories true? The flock will remember this day."

Rick sat up properly, suddenly feeling incredibly self-conscious and uncomfortable. "Oh god, not this shit again. Look, it's fine, just.. j-just let it go, OK?" He made a grab for the unfamiliar satchel and opened it, suddenly becoming confused when he pulled out the resin ceramic casing he had left behind and gave it an experimental tap with his fingers. It had started out pure white when he had sculpted it, but it had obviously tarnished during the firing process and was now light grey in color.

"What is this?" He turned it over in his hands, glaring hard as he inspected every last inch. It was still quite raw and the hard edges needed to be sanded back, but he was pleased with how it had turned out so far. The color didn't matter much to him as long as it did what it was supposed to.

"Ah, isn't it your completed project, sir?" The female watched him carefully. "Your strange metallic sliding shape is also complete. You left your schematics behind and they were not too hard to comprehend, so I finished them for you. Why not take a look?"

Rick didn't seem to notice. Without saying anything, he raised the hollow case high over his head and brought it down onto the coffee table with every ounce of his strength, vaguely impressed when it didn't break. This was exactly the kind of property he wanted out of the material; it was behaving exactly as he intended it to.

"Ah, sir?" The female bird-person was a mixture of worry and confusion. "What are you doing?"

Birdperson seemed ever so slightly unhappy. Rick's actions weren't making any sense and he was being destructive; he had just made a huge dent on the surface of his furniture. He wanted to stop the human right there and then, but everything he did usually had a valid reason behind it. He simply stood back and watched, observing what seemed like completely crazy, erratic behavior.

"I'm testing it out." Rick was grinning like mad as he tossed the resin ceramic case across the living room. He seemed even happier as he watched it bounce twice, loudly clattering as it skittered the rest of the way across the wooden floor, completely unharmed. "Fuck yeah! Th-that's a pass, baby!" He thrust both hands in the air and pumped his fists in victory.

"Are you done?" Birdperson shook his head at him. "What was the purpose of that exercise?" He picked up the ceramic case and against his better judgment, he dropped it back down on the coffee table, leaving it accessible to the scientist once again. If it was only going to be thrown again, he wouldn't be so likely to give it back a second time.

Rick sank back down on the couch and readjusted the blankets around himself. "I already told you, t-that was an impact test for durability. Do you honestly think I'd allow the portal gun to fail the same way it did last time? Fuck no!" He aggressively shook his head. "You know the only difference between science and screwing around is observing and recording the results, right?"

Birdperson stared back at Rick with a blank expression. He gave the feathered female a sideways glance of acknowledgment, who simply shrugged at him, seeming just as confused as he was.

Rick glared at both of their clueless faces. "Oh, fucking forget it! Just know that if it had broken, it wasn't worthy of being anything I'd own. I had a feeling it would behave like that, but I wanted to erase all doubt. Theory and reality aren't always the same." He picked up the satchel and took out the metal casing to inspect that next, wanting to distract himself from his own irritated mood; it seemed perfectly logical to him and it frustrated him that they didn't comprehend it at all.

"Do you like it?" The female said suddenly, stepping forward to gauge his reaction. "I followed the directions on your schematic exactly as you had drawn them out. And I am the best in the village, if I do say so myself..." She puffed out her feathers, feeling suddenly proud and self-important.

"Y-you finished it?" Rick scowled up at her. "That was my job!"

"Was I not supposed to?" The female's feathers deflated again. "Do you want me to melt down the metals so you can do it again? The alloy ratio is still on your schematic."

Rick released a tired sigh from the bottom of his lungs, feeling annoyed all over again. "No..." He upended the contents of his backpack all over the coffee table, not taking any care in it at all. "Just tell me how much I owe you s-so you can fuck off already." He began to sort through the pile and picked up a screwdriver so he could begin assembling the internal components of the portal gun.

"You don't owe me anything," the female sounded confused, "after hearing your story, I wanted to help in any way I could. You said so yourself, it was important to finish that. I feel that if I had been watching your child for you, things may not have turned out the way they did. I feel partly responsible for what happened and I hope what I have done can make amends."

"Y-yep, OK, totally done with you..." Rick threw the screwdriver down onto the coffee table and pointed hard at the door, waving his finger at it. "Get the fuck out!"

The female retreated and promptly turned on her heels, departing through the front door, saying nothing as she left. She had no idea what she had done wrong, but wasn't about to ask.

"Motherfucking... stupid bullshit..." Rick hissed aloud to himself as he finished screwing the first circuit board onto the containment casing. He gave it an experimental shake and picked up the next component to add onto it.

"Rick," Birdperson hesitated as he watched the female fly off into the distance. "That was not polite. She did you a favor."

"I don't need a lesson in fucking etiquette and manners, a-and not from you of all people!" Rick snapped at him. "Turn the fucking heat down and leave me alone, I gotta get this shit finished!"

Birdperson shook his head and left Rick to his own devices. At the very least, he was relieved; if Rick was in a foul enough mood to be angry and mean spirited, it meant he was back to his old self.


Rick had finally warmed up enough to retreat back to his room and he had taken everything back with him so he could continue to work without interruption. Although he did feel a little bad over what he had said to Birdperson, his only real motivation in the immediate was to complete the portal gun.

When he found the bottle of amber liquid waiting for him on the desk, he ripped the cork off and took a large gulp, incredibly pleased with the quality of the contents inside. Although it was a bit weak and perhaps too sweet for his liking, it wasn't making him feel ill. He took another mouthful for good measure and set the open bottle aside.

"Damn it, n-now I gotta say sorry to him... again." Rick grumbled to himself. "F-URRRRPPck..."

As he stood over the parts on his desk, his mind entertained the thought that he had probably made all the wrong choices today. He was still very much berating himself over the fact he had completely neglected to pay attention to Morty, however, he had already concluded that if he had chosen any other path at all, the outcome would have been very, very different. Gresharak would have lost her only daughter, which was a terrible thought all in itself, but it certainly wouldn't have turned out to be as beneficial to him as it was now. Despite everything being completely out of control, he was still very much on time and possibly even slightly ahead of where he should have been by now.

It certainly felt nice not to be kicked down for once.

After throwing some clothes back on and another long drink, Rick was positively buzzing with eagerness and perhaps the amount of alcohol content already in his bloodstream. As he hand-loaded the last of the components onto the metal containment housing, he clicked both halves together and screwed the two sides in place so they wouldn't move. He wasted no time sliding the completed portion into the resin ceramic casing and began attaching the three LED portal generators on the front face, wiring them in place with his ionic soldering gun.

"Oh man, this is gonna be so good," he said aloud to himself as he fanned solder smoke away with a hand, "this has been a long time coming... d-don't fuck up on me now, baby."

He flicked the maintenance hatch off the bottom of the portal gun and wired it up to the mains power so he could begin his first tests with live circuitry. The three little lights on the front face started to blink intermittently and he continued to work carefully, knowing full well that if he rushed the final steps of the compiling process, the whole thing could still explode.

Rick carefully set the portal gun down and watched the circuits inside spark and flicker as the device charged itself up for the first time. He delicately plucked the glass containment bulb up off the table and held it over the hole in the top hatch, waiting patiently. When the first sparks of burning, green, iridescent plasma started to spit up from the hole, he clamped the bulb down into place and quickly screwed it in, completing the final step of sealing the containment process.

With bated breath, all he could do now was wait; if anything was even slightly awry, whether it be a bad solder point or loose wire, the whole thing could become unstable and burn itself out. The green plasma sphere slowly rose from its core and hovered in the middle of the bulb, silently levitating. Suddenly, the dimension number indicator came to life as it calibrated itself and spat out a string of garbage characters before going blank as if demanding the operator to input something. The plasma sphere flickered in protest for a moment but soon stabilized itself.

Rick gave the bulb a wary tap with an index finger, but it was only a precautionary measure; he knew the device was perfectly fine. He had done the job with perfection right from beginning to end and there was no reason to worry. He sank back into his chair, a heavy weight lifting off his shoulders. It was finally done, and he was finally free to go wherever he wanted without bounds or limitations; the multiverse was his plaything to do with as he wanted once again.

The device was finally complete and he couldn't have been more proud of himself; the brand new portal gun was both new and old, a blend of borrowed things and innovation, and made out of only what had been accessible to him at the time. He knew he would build many more things in his lifetime but the portal gun was truly his magnum opus; it was what he wanted to be remembered by.

It was also a huge leap forward from the previous models he had made, which felt like amateur trash compared to what lay before him on the table. He had designed the new device with enough internal memory to store a near infinite number of coordinates with hundreds of characters in them, which could be recalled or stored in the portal gun's history with a simple click or twist of the small black rounded button at the topside of the handle.

The energy output had also been optimized so that the device could sustain up to 15 open portals at once, which was something that he figured would come in handy at some point along the way. The casing was also something he was particularly proud of; it was incredibly resilient and he could carry a piece of Bird World with him wherever he went. He was positively certain that no matter how hard he threw the portal gun, it would never break; the bulb would likely shatter long before the case did.

Rick felt like a child with a new toy and in that moment he may as well have been. He already wanted to show it off to Morty despite the fact the little boy simply wouldn't understand its significance. He was also eager to start playing with the device and testing its limitations.

Without even thinking, the scientist unplugged the portal gun from the mains power and began absentmindedly punching in the set of coordinates to his home world. He knew that it would take time before all the numbers from his head could be archived into the portal gun's memory bank, so manually entering characters would have to make do for the time being. If he only kept using it, he would have a decent list of stored coordinates before too long.

Rick aimed his new portal gun at the far wall of his room and fired it, a proud grin coming over his face as green shimmering halos of light spattered forth, behaving like viscous liquid as they adhered to the wall, melding together as they formed a bright green, shimmering, watery portal. He took a moment to stare at the interdimensional gateway simply because he had just missed seeing it.

However, he was quickly knocked out of his reverie; a harsh, cold wind blew through from the other side of the portal and granulated particles scattered across the floor, coating it with a thick layer of glass dust. It was a grim reminder of his situation and his heart sank in the realization of what he had just done.

"Shit..."

His portal gun suddenly began behaving strangely; the three little lights flickered on the front and they shorted themselves out. In another moment, both the portal and the device generating it had gone completely dead.

"No!" Rick slammed the portal gun back down onto the workbench and hurriedly popped open the maintenance hatch so he could try to work out what had just happened. "NO! Not now, oh god, not now... why the hell is it doing this?! I-I didn't do anything wrong!" He quickly turned the portal gun onto its side and hunched over it to poke at soldering points and connections with his fingers, though he couldn't find a single thing out of place.

"Weird..." Rick muttered aloud to himself as he returned the maintenance hatch to its rightful place. He turned the device back on and relaxed slightly when he discovered that the circuitry inside was still completely stable. "Maybe a startup glitch?" He shook the portal gun, causing the plasma sphere in the middle of the glass bulb to shudder in protest. He couldn't hear anything loose inside and now it was just annoying him.

He pressed the black control dial and recalled the previous coordinate. He fired it at the wall again and the portal wetly adhered to the wall once more as if nothing had happened. "Huh," the scientist said aloud, confused, "well I haven't screwed it up... i-it should be perfect... I don't get it."

The portal gun shorted out a second time.

"What the FUCK!?"

Now Rick was beyond pissed; the device had no logical reason to be behaving like this. Part of him wanted to rip it apart in disgust and take it back to bare componentry so he could find out where the fault was, but he had been so cautious and careful through every step of the building process, which meant that it should have been flawless; there was no conceivable reason why it wasn't it working as it was designed to.

Rick threw the portal gun down on the desk in disgust and buried his face in his hands, growling at himself; he felt like an utter failure. "Fuck... fuck fuck, fuck! God, why the hell is everything so fucked up!? C-can't even do one thing right... you're a goddamn hack!" He raised his head again and glared at the gun with utter contempt; it was perfect and nothing would ever convince him otherwise. He simply couldn't make peace with the fact he had done something in error.

Before he could entertain that thought any further, the digital dimensional display began to flash with an erratic display of garbage and bizarre foreign characters.

That grabbed his attention immediately. Rick snatched up the portal gun once again and was staring hard at it now; it really wasn't making any sense. He had never encountered such a weird behavioral bug before and nothing even remotely like it had ever happened to any of his previous models.

Suddenly, red letters began to scroll across the display in a digital red marquee.

- 'Hey. Don't freak out, I'm actually the least of your troubles for the time being. Don't go back to that destination. You do NOT want to see it right now. Trust me.' -

"What...?" Rick stared at the words, initially thinking he was going out of his mind. When they didn't disappear, he narrowed his eyes at the display, deeply suspicious. "What the fuck IS this?"

- 'Relax. Take a deep breath. You did not do anything wrong. The device is operational and functions exactly as you intended it to, which means you're a fucking genius. Give yourself a lollipop.' -

Rick turned his attention to the room around him as confusion set in; at first he thought it might have been a prank, but now that he had witnessed his own portal gun display responding to him as he spoke, he was suddenly paranoid; whoever was on the other side of the communications could both see and hear him.

"You're... y-you... you hacked my fucking portal gun, didn't you!?" He snapped in a sudden bout of rage. "And fuck you! I-I can go wherever I want!" He took a deep breath before launching into another bout of yelling. "Where are you?! Stop being such a smart-ass, fuck you!" He knew it was beyond all logic and reasoning to yell at an inanimate object, yet he did it anyway.

- 'As I said before, relax. It is imperative that you remain calm. I hate repeating myself. So do you.' -

"Oho, so you think you're funny now, huh!?" Rick angrily barked at the display. "Y-you son of a bitch! Why... h-how the hell did you hack my portal gun? Where are you?!"

- 'I get it. You are pissed off and you have all kinds of questions. I can answer them for you, but you have to remain calm. It's better for you that way, trust me. Write this next step down. Pick up a pen and get ready, OK?' -

Rick snarled as the words scrolled across the small screen, baring his teeth. "W-what the hell are you even playing at!? How can you see me? How the hell are you listening to what I'm saying to you?!"

- 'I'm not playing a game, this is an incredibly serious matter. I would not be wasting my time on you if it wasn't.' -

"Where the hell are you?!" Rick bellowed at the display, globs of spit flying across the desk. "Why are you fucking with me!?"

- 'I'm not fucking with you. And to answer your question, I am at my workbench, just like yourself. That IS pretty much all we do, isn't it?' -

"We...?" Rick narrowed his eyes in the realization of his next thought. "You're... you're a Rick, aren't you... what do you want with me?"

- 'Clever deduction, little scientist. Did you figure that one out all on your own?' -

"Fuck you!" Rick snarled in reply. Fighting against his better judgment the whole way, he picked up a pen and impatiently tapped the point down on a piece of scrap paper at the far end of his desk. "Fine, I'll... I'll bite. What do you want me to write down?"

- 'I knew you'd come around. Glad to see it, because things are going to get so much worse for you if you don't.' -

"W-what do you mean by that...?" Rick raised an eyebrow, deeply suspicious all over again; did he know something he didn't? Now he was just curious.

- 'Relax. Everything will be fine as long as you do exactly as I tell you. Visit 40512-4DD567127Z3-53995483-09995-Q-316 in exactly 8 hours and 0 minutes from this transmission. Look at your nearest clock and do the math to work out what that is in your current timezone. Do not be late. Repeat: do not be late.' -

Rick quickly scribbled down the character sequence and raised an eyebrow as he tried to mentally visualize where that destination could possibly be. He quickly deducted that he had no idea.

"Is there anything else?" Rick grunted as he returned his gaze to the room around him. He desperately wanted to know where the other Rick was and how he was so easily able to remotely access his portal gun display.

- 'No. Do yourself a huge favor and don't think about it. Plug your portal gun up to charge and just get some sleep before you wreck yourself.' -

Rick flattened his eyebrows, angry all over again; this guy was starting to sound like his mother. "A-are you done?"

- 'Yes. If you follow my instructions, I will entertain whatever you ask. I'm going to give you free reign over your portal gun again. Remember: do NOT be late. And don't go back to your native dimension's planet Earth for the time being. Your mind simply isn't ready to deal with what is on the other side just yet.' -

Rick twisted his mouth into a very-uncomfortable expression as he read the last part of that message.

- 'That is all for now.'-

And just like that, the digital display went blank again. The plasma sphere rose back into the middle of the glass bulb and levitated silently as if nothing had happened to the device in the first place.

Rick set the portal gun aside and exhaled sharply; his mind was racing with new questions all over again. How did the other Rick manage to hack his portal gun before it was even finished? Was it really that easy and vulnerable to attack? How was he even able to watch what he was doing? As he looked back down at the device, his mind bombarded him with all kinds of modification ideas. Suddenly, the portal gun felt like yet another half-finished project all over again; if it was so easily exploitable, then there was so much more he needed to add to it.

He felt like a complete idiot.

Who was this guy? Why was he watching him and what did he want with him? Was the entire room bugged? Was the other Rick going to kill him? He didn't know the answer to any of these questions and it was already driving him insane. Rick had always hated unknown parameters, yet here he was all over again, feeling hopeless and all he could do was wait it out, just like he had done in the cold dark tunnel during the storm, not knowing what was going to happen.

It had been a week since he had been displaced from his home world; he finally thought the week from hell had finally ended. Yet, it seemed like it was just beginning all over again.