Penny paused outside Sheldon's door and hugged Raj tightly. "Thanks for listening," she whispered.

Raj hugged her back, wishing there was some way for him to tell her that she wasn't a horrible person. She was just a person. A person in love with her best friend, stuck in a situation beyond her control.

Penny pulled away and took a deep breath. She opened Sheldon's door and stepped into the apartment. Howard and Leonard were surrounded by books and comics alternately reading and scanning their laptops. Penny looked at the notes they had written down, but none of it made much sense to her.

Sheldon was at his desk watching a NOVA video with Carl Sagan who was apparently discussing the possibilities of time travel when she sat down beside him and began watching. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, hoping she didn't know he was watching her. He was trying his best to focus on the program, but Penny's confession kept playing over and over in his mind.

He glanced at her again, noting the faint lines of tension around her eyes. This woman, this incredibly beautiful woman, who seemed to exist solely for the purpose of bringing chaos into the world, loved him? A guy who was apparently already in a relationship with someone else? Penny had said this Amy person was his perfect match, and that he cared a great deal for her. How could that be? He had never had any interest in relationships. He had no intention of dating. His time and energy was too precious to waste on such mindless endeavors. Why would he bother with trivial dating when there were mysteries of the universe to unravel?

Yet.

He couldn't deny the interest he had in Penny. There was something about her that felt (he cringed as the word burrowed into his mind) necessary. Like there had been a hole in his life he did not know existed until she arrived to fill it. Was this Amy person another hole he did not know existed?

Sheldon sighed to himself. This entire situation was exhausting. The sooner he returned Penny to her proper time, the sooner his life resumed its normal, unemotional, structured routine.


Penny stifled a yawn and looked across the room at the guys. Her heart hurt as she thought about what each one of them meant to her. Howard, who had settled down and become a loving husband and supportive friend. She had to admit that sometimes she was a bit jealous of their marriage. Then there was Raj. Sensitive, lovable, and compassionate. She always knew that no matter what happened, he would always care about her.

Next was Leonard. She loved him. She truly did. But she wasn't in love with him. She used to really enjoy being with him. They had a lot of fun together. Or rather, they used to until they got lost in the mediocre sex and jealousy. They had been great friends. They were terrible lovers.

And then there was Sheldon. She sighed softly to herself. There was no denying what he meant to her. He was her best friend. Her secret love. He was everything most important to her. And he was never going to be hers.

Penny moved across the room and curled up in the armchair. She laid her head against the back of the chair and thought back to her last night in her own time. She thought about the peppermint tea she drank. She thought about all the tears she shed. She thought about the pain that she had felt that night. Still felt, if she was honest.

Penny faced the possibility that this would always be how she felt. Could she do that? Could she live with this for the rest of her life? She stifled a sob as she was struck by the realization that no matter what time she was in, she was always going to want Sheldon, be jealous of Amy, and possibly trudge along with her relationship with Leonard.

She watched as Raj, Howard, and Leonard clustered around Sheldon and his white board near the kitchen counter. She silently stood and left the apartment. She walked into her apartment and looked at the sparsely furnished living room. She wandered into the bedroom and sat down on the bed. She cradled her head in her hands and sobbed softly.

After a few minutes she reached for a tissue. A small thud drew her eyes to the small crystal that had fallen onto the floor by her foot. She reached for it and held it up to the light. The flaw in the center seemed to glow lightly.

Penny brought it closer to her face, staring intently at that flaw. It seemed to pulse inside the prism. She watched it for several seconds before she realized it was pulsing in time with her heartbeat. Penny stood, as if in a dream. Suddenly she knew exactly what she had to do.