Chapter eleven

The clock slowly ticked round, he watched her chest slowly rise and fall, almost in time to the clock. I had to have been at least two hours later when her eyelids started to flicker open. Severus sat forward on his chair and clutched at her hand.

"Katarina" he said quietly so as not to frighten her.

"Am I dead" she asked. He gulped before composing his face.

"No your alive" he told her. He watched as she turned her face away with disappointment.

"Katarina, please, let me help you". He slowly brought his hand to her cheek and made her face him.

"I don't want help, I want out" her voice was sullen.

"Out of what?"

"Life, I have nothing left to live for, no-one to love me, no-one to care about, and no purpose". Her eyes were boring into his as he took a deep breath.

"I love you". Time seemed to stop after those three words, they both stared at each other; looking into one another's souls like no-one else existed. Katarina started to move, she tried to pull herself up to a sitting position but she didn't have the strength. Carefully Severus slid a hand under her back and pulled her upright and towards him. They both hesitated before letting their lips descend on one another. Months of contained passion flew out from both of them. Katarina drew back, biting her bottom lip. Severus saw how vulnerable she looked, her white face, smeared make up and red lips shiny from their embrace. He adjusted himself so that he was sitting beside him and she could lean into him.

"I promise to make you better, even if you fight me every day I will never leave you". His reply was her nuzzling into him.

"I'm tired" she murmured Severus carefully laid her back down before sliding in next to her.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Morning came too soon for either of theirs liking. Severus stared up at the ceiling. He knew today would be the start of one of the hardest times of his life. An image of his sister floated in front of him and a tiny tear slid down his cheek. He wouldn't fail Katarina. A rustle from his left side told him she was awake.

Katarina swallowed. She had failed in every way. She was alive. The Last of the Travain's. The hand on her shoulder reminded her of the events of last night. The life that she had locked away had run through her veins last night and reminded her what it was to be alive, how it felt, how it made her feel. However darkness still roamed her spirit and she knew it would be easier to give way to the darkness.

"Katarina, I know you're awake" she heard his soft silky voice. She slowly rolled over so she was facing him. She focused on every detail ingraining it into her memory. They stared at each other again, but before they both zoned out Severus stood up and left the room. Katarina gulped she knew exactly what was coming next. She shut her eyes tight again and wished that this was all an awful nightmare and she would wake up to the sound of her mothers voice calling her down for breakfast. Instead she woke up to Severus telling her open her eyes. She obliged, he carefully helped her up to a sitting position again and let her lean against the back wall. She crossed her legs. The way she was sitting reminded Severus of the pixie's who flew around near his home. He sat down opposite her and carefully crossed his legs as well. He was a very different man to the one the students would meet. In his hands he held a bowl.

"Three spoonfuls that's all I'm asking" he said. She nodded, but didn't go to pick up the spoon, instead she twiddled her thumbs. Severus sighed and filled the spoon with cornflakes and held it out to her.

"Your not a baby Katarina and I wont indulge you, if you don't take the spoon and feed yourself I shall get poppy to come down here" he knew the only way to get through to her was to be harsh but it hurt him to do it. Gingerly she took the spoon from him and put it to her lips. She carefully calculated the calories and fat content and opened her mouth.

Severus breathed a sigh of relief as he watched her chew and swallow. He filled the spoon up again and handed it back to her. She carefully ate it taking her time to chew the already soggy cereal. He handed her the third spoonful. This one went down quicker. She handed the spoon back scared he would try to force her to have another spoonful. He set the bowl and spoon aside, before turning back to face her. He cupped her chin in his hands and laid a soft kiss on her lips.

"I have to weigh you, the non magical way, using a spell like that could kill you" he told her. He watched as she stiffened, pure fear filling her eyes. Another kiss made her relax a little and he carefully scooped her up in his arms.

Katarina liked being his arms, she felt safe, she lent into his chest feeling the rise and full. She kept her eyes closed not wanting to even look at a set of weighing scales. He stopped in the bathroom and carefully set her down on the ground. He held her by her waist so that she wouldn't collapse and nodded towards the scales. She didn't move.

"Please Katarina" she shook her head again. Severus sighed and carefully lifted her up and set her on the scales. They bleeped away until a number appeared on the screen. 90lbs. He swept her up in his arms again and returned her to the bedroom. He swiftly left and went into his study, he grabbed the newly repaired vase and chucked it at the wall.