A/N: So… Double-update for the win anybody?

This chapter, with the way that the episode for this update went, I just decided to make it a joke about the one element of fanfiction writing that can ruin a story: The Mary-Sue.

Oh boy… Let's begin.

Disclaimer- You guys read it already!


"Come on aniki…" Sasuke whispered, trying to cheer Itachi on. In the library, Itachi was currently practicing spells and jutsu with the help of his younger brother.

"Okay…" Itachi nodded, putting his fingers in the proper position for a spell. He took a deep breath, a shimmer of red energy appearing around him. Sasuke stood perfectly still; holding out his chin in expectation before, in a flash, his chin was covered in an elegant stubble of a beard the same shade as his navy-blue hair.

"Hah!" Sasuke laughed out, rubbing his now rugged chin between his thumb and forefinger before he turned towards a chart and wrote down what Itachi had just done; filling out an already complex chart of abilities under Itachi's belt. "And that makes 135. 135 different things you can do with your powers, Itachi. And counting!"

"Sasuke cut it out…" Itachi shook his head, a blush of pride coming up. But Sasuke had just taken to looking at his new face in the mirror, nodding,

"Yeah… And I think that this one is the best yet." Then he began to play out what he would say if he saw Naruto's reaction to his new beard, "Hello Naruto. Oh, this? Just a little something I've been working on for a while." Itachi could only laugh before he announced,

"Sorry Sasuke, but it's just for practice and it has to go."

"Wait, no!" Sasuke called out but the beard had already disappeared in a red shimmer. "Damn it."

"135, Itachi!" Sasuke stated as the two brothers walked down the main street of Adamant Falls, "You're freaking amazing! I thought that most demons were only supposed to have a little magic and chakra for a certain skill they're good at."

"And that's usually true." Itachi explained, looking at the red chakra mark on his hand, "But Rokubi-sama once told me that that chakra and magic of certain demons is balanced enough to allow them to do all sorts of abilities."

"Well, I guess all that raw chakra is good for something." Sasuke smiled, glancing at his own blue-flame chakra mark, "You have talent in droves, aniki."

"Sasuke, stop." Itachi smiled, looking around, "I'm sure that other demons around have just as much magic as I do, if not more."

"Heh," Sasuke huffed, "I doubt tha— Oomph!" Out of nowhere, Sasuke was tackled down and carried away by a group of teen demons. "Itachi!"

"Sasuke!" The brunette gasped before trying to run after the crowd, asking, "What the hell are you guys doing?"

"Haven't you heard?" One of the demons announced as he convinced his friends to stop, "There's a new demon in town!"

"Yeah!" Another piped up, "They say she has more magic and power than any other demon around! Ever!" Itachi had to gulp at that, his ears drooping,

"Really?"

"Bull!" Sasuke interjected as he got his bearings straight, "No one around here has as much power or magic as Itachi." The young dragon though for a moment before he added, "Except maybe Kisame, but that's it!" But the news was already rattling Itachi's mind, so he asked the younger demons,

"Where is this new demon?"

"In the town square!" They all cheered before rushing off, "Come on!"


In the center of Adamant Falls, right by the city building and the waterfall, a large wagon had been set up. It was decorated in periwinkle and sparkles in the forms of sheets, paneling, streamers, etc. Itachi and Sasuke had just made it when a high-pitched, whiny, cocky, irritating female voice (A/N: Need some more description help? Let's see: take Mindy from the American show 'Totally Spies', Sissy from the French show 'Code Lyoko', Sailor Venus on a bad day, Princess Morebucks from 'The PowerPuff Girls' and fuse them all together. Yeah, you'll get what I'm talking about) called out,

"Come one! Come all and bear witness to the amazing magic and wonder that is The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue!" After that, the wagon opened up into a large stage before there was an explosion of periwinkle smoke that, upon clearing, revealed a young demon girl with long periwinkle-shaded hair, lavender eyes, pointed ears, and a magic wand in her hand that matched the magic-wand chakra-mark on her hand. She was clad in a lavender cloak and matching hat, covered in sparkles and rhinestones; everyone ooh-ing at her appearance…

Except for those in the front row, i.e.: Zetsu, Tobi, Sasori, Deidara, Kakuzu, Hidan, Kisame, Itachi, Sasuke, and Naruto.

"Watch in awe," Mary-Sue began, waving her wand about, "As The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue performs feats of magic and skill never before witness by demon eyes!" As she ended her statement, she waved her wand which caused a serious of fireworks and whistles to go off around her, creating a pretty sight.

"My, my, my." Deidara huffed, rolling his eyes before Sasori added,

"Such arrogant boasting."

"Come on!" Sasuke laughed, "Nobody is as magically inclined as Itachi!" Just then, the dragon noted that Naruto was standing beside him. "I mean," He cleared his throat, "Well, what I meant to say is… Um… Is that food over there?" He quickly flew off in a desperate attempt to salvage his reputation. When he was gone, Itachi asked Kisame (after getting over his initial blushing),

"There's nothing wrong with having magic skills, is there?"

"Nothing at all." Kisame shook his head, Kakuzu adding,

"Except when someone starts showing it off like a school-girl with new ribbons in her hair."

"Just because someone has more talent than others," Zetsu began, "Doesn't mean that they're better than they are. At least, that's what I think…" Mary-Sue had just performed a trick that made a rosebush bloom on stage when she heard the demons talking. She sneered at them,

"Well, well, well. It seems we have some nay-sayers in the audience! Who is so bold as to challenge the skill and magic of The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue? Do they not know that they are in the presence of the greatest demon in all the world?"

"Who do you think are?" Naruto shouted, "Blasphemy like that is an insult to the celestial beings!"

"Especially since you have one of their students here in the form of—" Sasuke's addition was cut off when Itachi covered his mouth and pleaded,

"Sasuke, please don't put me into this!"

"Mry Mm?" Sasuke mumbled, Itachi adding,

"Look at their reactions to Mary-Sue's magic skill. I don't want to be put in the spot-light like that and mess something up." After a while more of Mary-Sue's flashy antics, Kisame walked up and asked,

"So little girl, what makes you so sure that you're better than the rest of us?" The young demoness laughed, an airy, tin-like sound, before she answered,

"Why, only The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue had magic strong enough to slay the dreaded Ursa Major!" She waved her wand, her fireworks going off and staying in the air in the shape of a giant bear. Everyone gasped and awed, but Kisame shook his head,

"No one can slay Ursa Majors, they're beings of the—"

"When all hope was lost," Mary-Sue shouted, drowning Kisame out to the point that he just said forget it, "The demons of Étoile called on my expertise to save the day! The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue used her excellent magics to defeat the foul beast and send it back to its cave in the Yonko Forests!" Everyone had mixed reactions to that, all of them knowing that the Yonko Forests were the strange areas that surrounded the mountain range; a spooky, uninhabitable place.

"Wow!" The young group of demons, who were quickly becoming part of Mary-Sue's fan-club awed before one of them announced,

"That settles it: Mary-Sue truly is the most excellent, powerful, awesome demon in the world!"

"But what proof does he she have?" Kisame and Sasuke yelled, the dragon wanting to add something about Itachi's skills but a glare from the weasel-demon told him otherwise.

"Still doubt The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue?" The cocky demoness smirked, "Well then, I issue a challenge to all of you who live in Adamant Falls: Anything you can do… I can do better!" She laughed again before looking out into the audience, "Any takers? Anyone? Or am I truly destined to be the greatest girl who ever lived?" A roar of multi-colored flames enunciated her cries that time.

It was quiet for a moment before Sasuke pulled at Itachi's hand and groaned, "Come on, aniki!" Itachi was trying more than his best to stay quiet until Mary-Sue pointed her wand at him, calling out,

"How about you? Is there anything a plain-Jane weasel-demon like you can do that I can't? Hm?"

"That's it!" Hidan yelled, Kakuzu walking up with him, "I can't take any more of this shit!" Mary-Sue smiled, completely sure of herself as the two farm-working demons walked on stage. Kakuzu reached behind himself and retrieved his trusty rope before speaking,

"Can your magic do this?" In an instant, he had turned it into a lasso, spinning the loop around himself, jumping through it, even splitting it into two different lassos; catching everyone's attention before he used one to grab a roast chicken and another to grab a loaf of bread and a hunk of cheese from a nearby table.

"Show 'em Kuzu!" Hidan laughed out before he used the stitch-demon's back as leverage to jump into the air, his scythe in hand, and slice the three items in a series of skilled slashes that resulted in…

A series of sandwiches raining down into the audience. Everyone cheered as the two bowed, Kakuzu smirking, "Top that little lady." Mary-Sue giggled,

"Oh ye of little talent," Her whole being began to glow in a periwinkle aura, "Watch as my abilities shock and amaze!" The same glow surrounded Kakuzu's rope, the brunette not even having enough time to blink before the rope tied itself around Kakuzu and Hidan, two apples flying straight into their mouths.

The crowd clapped as the two struggled to make their way off stage, Mary-Sue smiling, "Once again, The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue prevails!" She glanced at Itachi again before calling out, "Does the pitifully weak weasel-demon wish to challenge me yet? Or is your magic-ability as lackluster as your pathetic appearance?" A loud crack sounded as Kisame walked up on stage, his anger causing him to step through the wooden platforms with a bit too much force.

"Kisame…" Itachi gulped as the shark-demon stood in front of the show-offy demoness, who had actually begun to shiver a bit.

"Shut your irritating mouth," Kisame said, his voice unnervingly calm as he stared Mary-Sue down, "Before I make it so that you would never be able to open it again." Mary-Sue gulped before holding up her wand and shouting,

"You wish to challenge me? You big brute!" Kisame shook his head before setting his sword on the ground and walking over to the side of the water-fall pool.

"Somehow," He smirked, "I doubt that you can swim." With that he jumped up into the air, coming down in the form of a shark that dived into the clear water. With speed and strength unmatched, he swam about and created three whirlpools in the small source of water before he swam to the base of the water-fall. He shifted back into his normal form before he laughed and began to, literally, run up the down-pouring waterfall.

"He's amazing." Itachi whispered just as Kisame got to the top of the waterfall. He looked down and seemed to make a quick calculation before he performed a simple hand-sign that caused a bridge of water to connect from the water-fall to Mary-Sue's stage. It was this bridge that he used to slide back down. He chuckled at Mary-Sue's jealous expression before he caused the water to take the form of a sitting chair and said,

"'Better to be quiet and let people think that you're a fool," He took a seat, "Than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt'."

"And he's a reader too?" Itachi wondered aloud. Mary-Sue was quiet for a moment before she smiled and waved her wand. All at once, the chair lost its shape. "Wait, what the hell?" Kisame shouted as the water surrounded him, abruptly freezing solid.

Everyone gasped and gulped, Kakuzu and Naruto quickly rushing on-stage to see if they could get Kisame thawed out. "Anyone with a brain knows how to counteract water!" Mary-Sue huffed. But Naruto growled, his tails bristling,

"Oh yeah? Can you counteract-fire?" He then exhaled a rush of red and orange flames that took the form of two large foxes; each bounding their way towards Mary-Sue. But she shook her head and sighed,

"Simple and uninteresting.", before she waved her wand: the fire-foxes seeming to get confused before they changed course back to their creator.

"Naruto!" Sasuke shouted, running onto the stage and pushing the blonde out of harm's way. Kakuzu jumped away just in the nick of time, the two foxes crashing into the Kisame-sicle and thawing the bluenette out.

"I can't…" Kisame spoke dizzily, "Move my legs…", before collapsing to the floor. Sasuke, Naruto, and Kakuzu helped him off stage before Tobi gently nudged Zetsu towards the platform.

"And what are you going to do?" Mary-Sue asked in a sneer. Zetsu only cleared his throat before opening his mouth and singing: the most beautiful notes falling from his lips, causing animals and birds all around to come towards the stage. But before the audience could cheer, and to not let herself be out-classed, Mary-Sue waved her wand; Zetsu's voice immediately changing into painful croaks and squawks that scared the small creatures away.

"Zetsu-san!" Tobi cried out, immediately helping the distressed plant-demon off of the stage.

"Don't worry," Mary-Sue laughed, "It should wear off in an hour!" The group of demons in the front all began angrily talking amongst themselves before Deidara spoke up,

"Enough is enough! Why are we wasting our time with this bratty girl, un?" Sasori agreed,

"You all need to just ignore the little pest! We all need to conduct ourselves with beauty, style, and grace!" Mary-Sue rolled her eyes before laughing,

"What's wrong? Scared you'll tear your gaudy outfit, red? Or afraid you'll get a hair out of place in that filthy snake's nest you call a hair-do, blondie?" Both the fashinistos stopped in their tracks, eyes wide at the insults, before they turned, Sasori called back,

"Oh! It…"

"Is…" Deidara added before Sasori went again,

"On…"

"Bitch!" They both ended as they both went on stage. The scorpion immediately began,

"You may think that power and magic are all that matter." He snapped fingers before a copper glow surrounded the curtains of Mary-Sue's stage and pulled them down; Sasori immediately going to work on the fabric.

"But a demon has to have style, un!" Deidara smiled, waving a finger to make a hair-styling kit appear. Everyone around watched the two demons work until they looked upon them with shock and surprise.

"Demons must have beauty!" Sasori announced as he stood, now clad in a violet tuxedo with gold trimmings.

"Demons must have grace!" Deidara called out, his hair in a high pony-tail that curled down in a shower of high-lighted strands. Mary-Sue's expression was unreadable before her body glowed and she waved her wand. Sasuke was sure that the two fashionistos would settle this,

"Sasori and Deidara are far too prideful to let Mary-Sue get them down and –" There was the sound of an explosion before Sasuke stopped mid-sentence. Everyone gave horrified gasps as they saw Sasori and Deidara, the red-head screaming,

"SOMEBODY GET ME A MIRROR!"

"What did she do to my hair, un?" Deidara sobbed, "I know that she did something awful to my hair~!"

"Gods above, please don't let me be clashing!" Sasori shouted.

"It's fine." Itachi lied.

"You look great." Kakuzu coughed out.

"Never better!" Tobi nodded. But Sasuke's eye twitched as he said,

"I think I'm going to puke.", causing the group to glare at him.

Finally, Sasori calmed himself down enough to conjure up a full-body mirror; both demons gingerly looking into it. Sasori was speechless, all words gone from his body as he saw the purple and green suit-jacket and pink pants he was wearing. Tears streamed from Deidara's eyes as he looked at his hair: now dyed purple, sprinkled in old snake-skins, and shaped like a nest.

"Purple… hair..?" The blonde bird-demon whimpered, biting his lip before Deidara and Sasori looked at each other.

3.. 2.. 1..

"OH DEAR GODS!" They both bawled as they ran off the stage and through the crowds, desperately trying to get out of the public eye. "I look like a wretched excuse of a kabuki-dancer!" Sasori howled, Deidara sobbing,

"Purple hair! Such a hideous color for hair~!" Unfortunately, at that time, they had passed the snake-demon Orochimaru, who happened to be a kabuki professor, and a young demoness named Anko who actually had purple hair.

"Of all the rude…" Orochimaru hissed. Ano pulled down a lock of her purple hair before gritting out,

"Why, I never!"

"Well," Sasuke huffed, "We've all tried our hands at it. Itachi, let her have it!" When all attention turned towards him, Itachi gulped and began to cough,

"Oh, I'm nothing special – What's this? A sore throat? I should go home…" And with that, he disappeared in a red flash, causing Mary-Sue to laugh,

"Once again, The Great and Powerful Mary-Sue has been seen as the greatest of them all!" She giggled as she slowly walked off stage, smirking, "Like there was ever any doubt." The spectacle done, everyone slowly dispersed from the area; except for Sasuke who could only shake his head in silence at Itachi's actions.


A/N: Everyone put down your torches and pitch-forks, Mary-Sue is meant to be an annoying bitch. Calm down and read on…

-Tyranno's girl.