4.1. 222 Days of Light
My bedroom is my only sanctuary. It is where I can rest in the blankets and kisses of night, where everything in the universe makes sense, and where everything in the world is right.
My bedroom is no long my sanctuary. It has abandoned me for a mistress all too kinder and all too shallow.
As I shut my eyes, the sound of tides and whispers enter my ears and nothing makes sense any more. All understanding of the universe left with my sanctuary, everything stolen by the mistress known as love.
Love has visited me; love has forced my life upside-down and inside-out.
Everything is wrong, nothing is right; perhaps William Golding is sneering in his grave, who really knows anymore.
In the span of a week, perhaps a bit longer, both of my closest male friends announced to me that they hold very un-gothic feelings towards me.
I should have seen it. Those two... there were tensions between them for years now. Ever since we entered high school, ever since Red's attempts at suicide, all of those things; the tensions between them only seemed to grow and now we were at the vertex of this trouble... now it all centered on me...
Joshua had asked me which one I had loved.
What a difficult question to answer. I love all of them to some extent. They're family to me; I've known all of them for most of my life.
In fact, I've known Red almost my entire life. Our parents were friends and we used to have play-dates. We've been friends longer then we've been Goths.
It speaks novels.
Then there's Logan. He was old enough to legally have sex and just at the appendix of his senior year.
And me, sixteen and at the end of my sophomore year...
I've never been a big fan of relationships with a significant age differences.