Author's Note: Well, I think you guys doubted you would ever hear from me again, but sadly, you were wrong. Also sadly, school has continued to be school. But thank you guys for reviewing and not declaring me dead.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Total Drama belongs to its owners and creators.
"Last time on Total Drama Heart Island," Chris began while standing on the dock. "We had our contestants wander around looking for statues of me!"
"Jayce continued to show his more manipulative side while Hans and Annabelle continue their growing romance."
"But in the end, the Sensitive Capillaries won and," Chris pouted slightly. "Nobody ended up going home."
"So who will be taking a trip on the Boat of Losers next on Total! Drama! Heart! Island!" Chris exclaimed.
Dear mom and dad, I'm doing fine
(The camera take an aerial view of a heart-shaped island for a moment, before diving down onto ground view and zooming across the island, angering Chris because the camera knocked over his coffee)
You guys are on my mind
(Xochitl is drawing in her sketchbook, glaring at the camera as it zooms past)
You asked me want I wanted to be
(Tiana is chasing a butterfly, but she trips over a cardboard cut-out of a Chris idol, allowing the butterfly to fly away)
And now I think the answer is plain to see
(Cashmere is climbing up a tree, yelling at squirrel that had stolen her cowboy hat when the butterfly lands on the tip of her nose, causing her to sneeze and fall off, the squirrel laughing and scurrying away in victory)
I want to be famous
(Hans is nervously chatting with Annabelle, before he is pelted by acorns. The camera pans up to reveal the perpetrator is none other than cowboy hat wearing squirrel)
I want to live close to the sun
(Atlas is talking to a bored intern, describing a sports victory vividly)
Well, pack your bags because I already won
(Jayce causally walks by, throwing away a gum wrapper that reflects the sun onto Atlas' shoelaces, causing his shoelaces to set on fire)
Everything to prove nothing in my way
(Launa is treading water in the lake, trying to convince a fearful Maggie that nothing dangerous is in the water while Atlas jumps in, in the background. The resulting ripples cause a shark to surface, and both girls run away)
I'll get there one day
(Chef, staring at the scene out a window in the mess hall, shakes his head in dismay)
Cause I want to be famous
(Chef turns around, and continues trying to force-feed Ashton a mysterious grey slop)
Na, Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na, Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
(At the Arteries table, Jason, Graham and Ricky are playing cards. Ricky puts down his cards, revealing he won, and cheers. Graham rolls his eyes while Jason throws down his cards in anger)
I wanna to be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous
(Nathan and Lynn are playing on their guitars together in front of the lodges before Nathan gets too excited and smashes his guitar on the ground before looking sheepish)
I wanna to be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous
(The camera pans up to the sky, and day dissolves into night, the camera then panning down to the campfire)
(Whistling)
(Everyone's sitting at the campfire, happily munching on marshmallows while the title fades in)
Hans sighed wistfully as he sat in the mess hall the next morning, ignoring the breakfast of gummy scrambled eggs littered with crushed egg shells.
-Flashback-
"So, this is my favorite book," Annabelle stated. She and Hans were sitting on the ground, leaning against one of the outside walls of the bathrooms. "I've read it about a million times."
"I've seen this in my school library before, I've just never read it," Hans said.
"You really should," Annabelle encouraged. "It's got a really good immersive fantasy universe."
Hans chuckled softly. "I'll check it out."
"So, tell me more about what you like to do," Annabelle said. "So far we've been mostly talking about me."
"I don't know, you're pretty interesting."
Annabelle blushed pink. "I'm sure you're interesting, too."
"Well, I like to bake. You know, brownies and cookies," Hans said. "It's not my family's favorite activity for me, however."
"Why?"
"I may have started a fire one time."
"One time?"
"Okay, five times. They shouldn't be making stuff so easily flammable these days!" Hans argued.
"Remind me to never let you step foot in my kitchen," Annabelle giggled.
Hans blushed before looking down at the watch on his wrist. "Stront! We have a challenge tomorrow!"
He stood up and offered his hand to Annabelle. "We need to get to bed."
Annabelle took it and stood up. "Talk to you later?"
Hans blushed again and mumbled, "Yeah. Talk to you later."
-End Flashback-
Hans looked up briefly from his plate to see Annabelle send him a small wave. He blushed and sent one back.
...Confessionals…
"Schattige," Hans murmured.
….End Confessionals…
Jason was staring at his plate in shock, his eyes still a little wide from yesterday's revelation.
"Man, you've got to eat!" Nathan exclaimed before shoving spoonful of the scrambled eggs into Jason's mouth, causing him to cough and sputter.
"Ugh-what is in this stuff?" Jason downed a glass of water.
"Eggs, milk, butter, eggshells, negligence," Graham answered, pushing his food around on his plate with a fork.
"Don't do that ever again." Jason pointed his fork threateningly at Nathan.
"But it worked, didn't it?" Nathan said.
"Non-negotiable."
Settler was bemoaning her bad luck by mutely chewing on Chef's scrambled eggs, then subsequently quickly swallowing mouthfuls of orange juice.
...Confessionals…
"I do not want to be known as that freak forever and ever, okay?" Settler said.
….End Confessionals…
Lynn was trying to cheer her up, albeit badly. "Hey, it's okay, people forgive and forget, you know?"
"But not on international television," Settler grumbled.
"Who knows? It could be cut."
...Confessionals…
"No way!" Chris chortled. "Humiliation sells almost as much as pain!"
….End Confessionals…
Settler didn't reply.
"Just try not to think about, okay?" Lynn said.
...Confessionals…
"Try not to think about it?" Settler exclaimed. "How can I not?"
….End Confessionals…
Tiana was artfully rearranging her food when she looked up to see a blissful Annabelle across from her.
...Confessionals…
"Annabelle seems happy," Tiana observed. "I wonder why? It can't be the food."
….End Confessionals…
"Hey, why are you so happy?" Tiana blurted out.
"Huh?" Annabelle blushed slightly. "It's a nice day out."
...Confessionals…
"I'm not sure how, um, friendships with the other team work," Annabelle said. "Will they be mad? Disappointed?"
….End Confessionals…
The other cast members were chatting when the door to the mess hall swung open and Chris entered the room with his usual panache. "Hello, contestants!"
The contestants decided to ignore him.
"I have your next challenge! Have you ever heard of a little thing called…paintball?"
...Confessionals…
"This is the exact opposite of camouflage," Jayce remarked, observing the blue camouflage hat Chris had given him.
….Break…
"I feel so subtle." Graham stared blankly at the camera, a bright red camouflage hat on his head.
….Break…
"I don't like having my hat being taken away." Cashmere patted the blue camouflage hat sourly.
….Break…
"I'm not sure how much of good idea this is." Maggie awkwardly shifted the paintball gun she was holding.
….Break…
"This is an awesome idea. Period," Launa said.
….Break…
"I need to get one of these for my art!" Tiana exclaimed, waving the paintball gun around. "Paintball paintings!"
….End Confessionals…
"The rules of paintball are simple," Chris stated, pacing in front of the contestants as they stood at the entrance to the forest. "One: don't get hit. Two: Make sure you hit someone else with a paintball."
"That's…it?" Hans asked.
Chris nodded.
...Confessionals…
"Great. Another games with no rules." Graham rolled his eyes.
….Break…
"Great! Another game with no rules!" Nathan cheered.
….Break…
"If you don't have any rules in a sport, then you don't have a sport," Atlas said. "And that's bad because I rock at sports."
….End Confessionals…
"You've got the entire forest as you're battlefield, so I'm expecting some creativity, people!" Chris exclaimed. "Now, you've got five minutes to find your places and then you can start shooting. Those five minutes start…now!"
The two teams shrugged, before meandering into the forest.
Chris groaned, before pulling out an audio recorder. "Note. Make Chef teach a crash course in plot-appropriate exits."
...Confessionals…
"I just…really didn't feel like running?" Maggie shrugged.
….Break…
"There is no way I'm teaching those ungrateful kids how to exit correctly," Chef grumbled. "Let Chris do it."
….Break…
"I can't do that!" Chris protested. "I'm the host! It's beneath me! Have an intern do it!"
….Break…
"I'm not sure how to teach a crash course in plot-appropriate exits." Daniel shrugged, before turning to Connie, who was right next to him. "You?"
Connie shook her head.
"Hey!" yelled Chris from outside the booth. "Get out of the confessionals!"
….End Confessionals…
"Okay, so we need to spread out," Launa directed her teammates, who were all scattered out before her. "Any preferences?"
"Anywhere but the side closest to the lake," Maggie said.
"Same here." Tiana raised her hand.
"I'm up for anywhere," Cashmere stated.
The rest of the contestants nodded.
"Then just, um, spread out!" Launa exclaimed. "We need to cover a lot of ground. So watch your back and your front and both of your sides. The enemy could be anywhere."
...Confessionals…
"Enemy?" Annabelle looked around nervously. "That's a bit of a harsh word, isn't it?"
….Break…
"We need to be competitive!" Launa slammed her fist on her hand. "Just, not, you know, overly so. Ow."
….End Confessionals…
Ricky tapped Ashton's shoulder, exclaiming, "Want to stick together? You know, two minds are better than one?"
Ashton nodded. "Yeah, sure."
"Cool!" Ricky cheered, before dialing it down. "I mean, um, cool."
...Confessionals…
Ricky face-palmed. "I'm a dork."
….End Confessionals…
Maggie shuffled up to Launa after her speech. "Uh, Launa, have you played this before?"
Launa brightened. "Yeah! It's pretty fun, once you get into it."
"Do you think you can help me, just a little?" Maggie asked. "I've never played this before, and Chris wasn't exactly helpful."
Launa grinned. "Sure!"
A few seconds after the words left Launa's mouth, Jayce walked up.
"Hey, you two are going to be partners, right?" Jayce asked and the girls nodded. "Want to form a group?"
Launa nodded enthusiastically and Maggie shrugged somewhat nervously.
...Confessionals…
"I still need to form relationships with my teammates, so they don't try to vote me off. And the best way to do that is to participate in activities with them," Jayce explained. "Yeah, that's why..."
….End Confessionals…
Annabelle was inspecting her paintball gun experimentally before Tiana popped out beside her. "Hi!"
"Gah!" Annabelle fumbled with the paintball gun before nearly dropping it on her foot. "You scared me!"
"Sorry! So, um, roomie, have you ever used these before?" Tiana asked.
"Erm, no." Annabelle continued to poke at the paintball gun's mechanisms.
"My art teacher once had us use some of these to make a mural," Tiana said. "He was the coolest art teacher I ever had."
...Confessionals…
"Sure, he got fired three weeks into the second trimester for running through the campus in nothing other than swim trunks, a shower cap and his artistic integrity, but he was still the coolest art teacher I ever had," Tiana said.
….End Confessionals…
"Want to, like, partner up together? The more the merrier?" Tiana asked and Annabelle nodded.
Cashmere observed the other groups forming and tipped her hat forward. "I guess I'm goin' solo. But I still really hate this hat."
Atlas was lecturing his teammates, who were standing before him. "We've got to step it up this round! We've lost every challenge so far!"
...Confessionals…
"And whose fault was that exactly, Mr. Wipeout?" Graham asked.
….End Confessionals…
"Technically, we didn't lose the building challenge," Lynn pointed out.
"Okay, except that one," Atlas grumbled. "The point is, some of us need to take it to the next level!"
...Confessionals…
"Some of us?" Graham questioned.
….Break…
"Not cool, dude," Nathan shook his head. "Not cool."
….Break…
"I thought we did well on the building challenge!" Hans exclaimed.
….End Confessionals…
"We need to win so stay focus, and remember, be tough!" Atlas finished and his teammates grumbled before grouping up.
...Confessionals…
"Strange." Atlas scratched his head. "My speeches always work at home."
….End Confessionals…
"Settler, want to work together?" Lynn said to her still downtrodden friend.
"Yeah," Settler agreed. "Hey, do you have any idea how to operate these things?"
"Um, point and shoot?"
...Confessionals…
"I need to be there for my friend during this difficult time with her, um, what is he exactly to her?" Lynn said.
….End Confessionals…
"Buddies?" Nathan grabbed Graham's and Jason's shoulders and pulled them towards him.
"Sure," muttered Graham and Jason nodded.
...Confessionals…
"I should be there for Jason, considering, I may have caused all of this 'vampire drama'." Nathan twiddled his fingers. "But not on purpose! Plus, I'm still working on befriending Graham."
….End Confessionals…
Hans watched his teammates get into groups before looking around timidly.
...Confessionals…
"I think I may just go by myself," Hans said. "I mean, paintball can't be that hard, right?"
….End Confessionals…
"I'm going solo!" Atlas announced after seeing his other teammates make groups. "I can scout out the area for you guys, make sure everybody's doing well, and, you know, help you guys!"
Graham rolled his eyes. "Sure, whatever you say."
...Confessionals…
"Somebody needs to make sure everybody's okay." Atlas looked around before whispering, "I don't think they know how to play."
….Break…
"I don't think I need to help," Hans objected. "I mean, you just need to, um, hit people, right?"
….End Confessionals…
While the campers were chatting, a deafening screech of feedback rang out from the speakers around the island. "Contestants! You're five minutes are up! Now get to hunting!"