Chapter SONG: When I grow up - The Pussycat Dolls

Chapter Summary:

Anthony and Chris question Edward about his sex life.

Original book: Tainted Dawn

Edward POV

I sighed as the conversation that had been going on for well over half an hour, reached the point where I knew I would have no choice but to become a part of it.

"Dad is it true that your sex life diminishes as you get older?" My son asked.

I looked up from where I had been reading in my arm chair, to where they were sat on the sofa watching TV.

"What?" I asked, praying to god that I had mis heard but knowing I hadn't.

"I was just worried about what eternity might mean if it does?" Anthony continued.

I sighed, "No that isn't true for me and tour mother, let's just say the saints are still marching in."

Anthony frowned, "You don't have to over exaggerate."

My eyebrows went high, "Who's exaggerating? Listen on this topic I speak the truth honest, you could set your clock by me." I said.

Anthony folded his arms, "Yeh if we set it every twenty years."

I sat up, putting the book down, "Look if you guys are having trouble putting out I'm sure I could give you tips."

Anthony looked like he was going to be sick and Chris went straight into the defensive.

"No it's not that, I and Ness are great, thanks for asking." He stuttered and my face hardened as he spoke of my daughter in this way.

Anthony started to speak then, "Yeh me and Aimee are great also, I always know when she's in the mood because she gives me this little sideways smile."

I frowned as he pulled the side of his face up into an expression i was sure Aimee had never pulled.

"Maybe that's her telling you to hurry up and get it over with." Chris commented and Anthony hit him hard across the shoulder.

I sighed, "Looks aren't needed in mine and your mothers relationship."

Anthony raised an eyebrow, "You mean you don't look at one another when you're doing it?"

I growled and leant forwards to give him some choice words when my wife walked into the room.

My arms folded over my chest as I leant back in my seat, not wanting to ignore her completely but letting it be known that I wasn't her best friend at the moment. I was still more than pissed about her letting Ellie spend the night at Bens without my knowledge.

My wife held a bowl of chips out to me which she had been eating, "Edward do theses seem old to you?" She asked.

I glared at her, "You are what you eat."

Everyone including my newly arrived daughter and daughter in law gasped.

Bella bristled and put the chips in my lap, before straightened and gesturing Anthony without tearing her eyes away from mine.

"Fine, Anthony give your father his dose of miserable bastard." She snapped and flitted from the rom.