"Axel, you could have placed me a little closer to the edge and slept on the bed as well." Roxas did not wake him, but his words were the first thing to greet Axel when he awoke. Axel sat up groggily, squinting against the bright light streaming in through the windows. "How'd you know…never mind, I don't even need to ask. And to answer your question, I could've. But then several people in this castle would have had my head for corrupting your princely innocence."
Roxas stared blankly at him. "What?"
With all the reading he had done, which Roxas still didn't seem to understand was a wonder given the short span of time he had performed it in, it was easy to forget Roxas had not actually learned any of the knowledge he possessed through experience. All of it came from books. And apparently, there had been a lack of…even cheap romance epics in the castle library. Even the largest library Axel had ever seen had standards, he supposed.
"I'll explain to you some time. Have you been awake long then?"
"I woke with the sun." Roxas paused. "I have been thinking."
"No scrying to start out your day?" Axel asked lightly.
"…no. I don't think I will scry casually ever again. Maybe if dire circumstances made it necessary. But I…never felt right watching people without their knowledge or permission. It was just, back then, it was the only way I had contact with everyone else. And now I can't justify that temptation any more. I have been thinking about…my parentage, mostly."
"Oh?" seemed the only appropriate response that did not pose the threat of being overly callous. "Well, you've got magical blood and royal blood in you. Which lineage were you thinking about?"
"Both." Roxas rocked back and forth, clutching his knees to his chest. "I'm an only child. An only son. So I believe I'm next in line for the throne of his kingdom according to your laws, right?"
"Well, not my laws, but yes."
"…I don't know that I want to take up the kingdom though."
"You're kidding. Why not? This life's been denied you ever since you were born, and now you get a chance to get it all back." Axel did not really care for the whole familial dynasty rule that a monarchy required; he'd never seen the sense in it. Sure, the kingdom might have one wise and generous king and then have everything handed over to his black sheep of a son upon the old geezer's death, and then what would they do? Well, there was always assassination, but that was besides the chief point. Still, he cared for this kid, and he was honestly dumbfounded that Roxas was implying a consideration of giving up a life of luxury and peace, one that had been long rightfully overdue.
"Axel, I'm sixteen years old."
"So?"
"And look at me. I have none of the experience that would befit a proper ruler and I would certainly not have gathered much of it in the years to follow before I would ascend to the throne. Also…" Roxas looked away. "The people would not want me as king."
"What?"
"Axel, you know it. You're just not admitting it to yourself. The people feared my mother, the sorceress. They most certainly will fear her son, who also has her sorcerous blood coursing through his veins. They might accept it grudgingly, but they would not live happily under my reign."
"Well, bugger them! Who cares what a bunch of peasant half-wits who don't bother to see the truth right before their eyes think?" Axel was fully awake now and he sat up, determined. "Roxas, there might be stupidly prejudiced people who don't bother to think beyond 'oh, his mother was evil; like mother, like son, gods preserve us'. But I know what you're really like. I've spent all this time with you. You're kind to a fault. You're intelligent, by all means. You're brave, sympathetic, self-sacrificing… If they're not at the very least proud to have you as eventual king, well, then they're bloody fools." Axel stopped, thought very carefully about what he had just revealed out loud, and blanched.
"…thank you, Axel. You may think that of me…but it's the good of the people that really matters."
"What did I just say about self-sacrificing…"
"And isn't a ruler supposed to think always of what is best for his people? Even if I were the most benevolent king of the ages, if they still distrusted me and lived under a self-imposed cloud of fear, I would not have done the duty properly. It's for the best, Axel. I know you think me foolish for turning down the prospect of a life as a crown prince and then a liege, but I couldn't accept it with a clear conscience." Roxas rose and meandered his way over to the window. The light blazed in his hair as he looked out, eyes seeing things that Axel could not, and the redhead would have paid an infinitely high price to have been able to at that moment. "And besides, this is all assuming I'm even still a crown prince right now."
"Why wouldn't you be? What are you saying; of course you're still a crown prince. Being away from the kingdom even for fifteen plus years doesn't make you…"
"I don't mean that." Roxas was still staring into the distance outside. Axel got to his feet and made his way over. He leaned on the window frame and followed Roxas's gaze outwards. They were highly situated in the castle. Down in the actual district of the city, little dark figures milled about. Most likely nobles and maybe a few hopeful vendors attempting to ply their wares for a higher price than they would be able to ascertain in their own humbler districts. High above them, the sun hung high in the sky; it was midday. Though Axel hadn't been in this city for years, everything felt familiar already. The faint bustle of the city marketers below, the place just felt like a welcome change from all that they'd been through the past few weeks into normal again. He couldn't call it home, not really, but it was as close as any. He wondered what Roxas saw when he looked out. Sure, the boy had been born here, but he had really seen nothing of it until now, hadn't he? What did he see? Did he see an escape from the coldly sheltered life he'd led thus far? Or did he see a foreign strange city, daunting in its lack of understanding for the magic that Roxas lived upon?
"What will he say?" Roxas said so quietly so as to be almost a whisper. His face looked paler in the sunlight. "I may be his son but I've never known him. He's never known me. We are as strangers to one another." He raised his hand, looked at it, long-fingered and delicate lines. "I just killed his wife, my mother. I can tell myself I had to do it, but what will he—what will my father say? What do I tell him to not cause him to hate me even more?"
"The truth, silly." When Roxas looked at him, Axel impulsively smirked and brushed a tuft of drooping golden hair from Roxas's eyes. "They're not all as dumb as they look, you know. Like that guard, you know, the one who helped you get to the wall yesterday? He and I were talking yesterday in here while you were sleeping. Don't tell him I said so, but his brain's not half bad. He's well aware that there were strange things happening with…the girl he and your father grew up with and then the woman his Majesty eventually married. So no one's going to be so dumb as to just scream regicide without noticing any of the circumstances. Hey, kid. Remember. It can't have been an easy ride for your dad either if he's been slowly drained dry by…his wife. I'm sure he'll understand. You just explain things and everything will be fine."
"…I want to believe you."
"Then, do. I'll wager the whole pot's worth on this one, just for you, alright?"
"…I don't understand. Are you referring to a game?"
Axel found he had to delay the enlightenment of Roxas to the rudiments of the marvelous pastime called poker. They did not know when the summons would come, as it inevitably would; they couldn't just stay in this castle as indefinite guests forever after all. But Axel thought Roxas had better things to do than confuse the turmoil in his mind right now by trying to learn gambling (and at such a young innocent age), so he left Roxas, with certain misgivings as he kept glancing over at the silent figure time after time, thinking to himself.
Demyx came to visit, not too late in the afternoon, dragging Zexion with him. Although, Axel had to say, the latter did not look entirely too unhappy at being, ahem, manhandled in such a way. "Look, I'm not going to ask for every single detail, especially concerning how you did all that and put on such a dazzling display of lights in the process because I remember what you told me and I'm not going to bug you into explaining something that we can't understand no matter how hard you try—"
"Demyx, breathe," Zexion murmured, though he looked very much as if he wanted to attempt to understand whatever it was Roxas thought their human minds could not comprehend.
"I am, but thanks, Zexy. But is she gone? Is she…"
"She's not dead," Roxas said slowly. "I couldn't kill her; she was right about that. I'm not saying I wasn't able to; I might have been able to, but it would have cost me dearly. But I don't think I could have made myself…take a life, even a life as misguided as hers seemed to me. But she won't be coming back. There is no chance of her being able to do that now."
"So…can you tell us just a little bit? Dumb it down, if you have to. I'm curious!" So much for not bugging him about explanations.
"I…" Roxas fumbled for words. Axel nudged him. "Roxas. If you really don't want to, you don't have to." And he looked warningly at Demyx, who ducked his head sheepishly.
"I can try… Demyx, you're a bard, and you know all about storytelling, right?"
"So he likes to claim," Axel muttered under his breath just loudly enough to be barely audible and he dodged the kick Demyx aimed at his leg.
"Have you…spun tales about fictional places and characters then?"
"Not that much. I mostly compose stories and verse about figures in history as closely to the real story, as best gleaned from scanty reports and such, as possible. But yes, I think I've tried enough to be able to understand whatever it is you're about to say."
Roxas blew out a breath. "Then… when you have a character, a serving one, that only ever existed to fill a specific role in the story. Say, to hand the hero his map that leads to some treasure or other. And after the hero moves on from this town never to return again, that one person remains living, or so you assume, unless you say specifically that he died. But, he never appears in the tale again. Save maybe a few mentions perhaps, but his physical person does not."
"…how did you do that to her though?"
"I'm not saying I did exactly that to her. I was comparing. An…analogy, I think?"
"Oh." Demyx frowned, brow wrinkling in thought. "I don't think I understand how that would work on a real person."
Roxas spread his hands helplessly. "That's the best way I know how to explain it. I'm not…I'm not sure."
"It's fine, Roxas." Axel touched his arm. "You tried. I think…there are just going to be some things we'll never understand completely about that." He bent closer and said more softly. "Plus, save your breath for the summons."
He was sorry he even thought to mention it when Roxas paled at the reminder and nodded slightly.
"So what's going to happen now?" Demyx broke in. He shrugged when three pairs of eyes turned to him. "It's almost as if…everything that has happened in our lives has led up to this moment—well, not this particular moment, but that dramatic moment. It was fitting, really, as if scripted straight from the leaves of a story. And now…in the aftermath…" Demyx stopped. He really didn't need to explain himself. They all understood what he was saying. There seemed nothing else to be done that could match the wonder, the finality of that moment. Nothing in life could ever be as vivid.
"Does it matter, Dem?" That was the first time Axel had ever heard Zexion refer to Demyx by name or nickname, and he grinned suddenly, uncontrollably. No wonder. It carried a running undertone of uncharacteristic thoughtfulness, tenderness, and general affection that, Axel suspected, had the man known about, he would have refrained from using in any semblance of public.
Zexion was continuing even as these thoughts raced through Axel's head and left him smirking like a loon (thankfully, no one seemed to notice. Well, Roxas did; the boy missed nothing, but he did not comment out loud.). "Even if our lives do appear relatively mundane after what we've all experienced, they still go on. It's blunt to say this outright, but memories do fade. Especially the memories of men. What seems amazing now in the immediate time afterwards may fade to only a memory of wonderment in a year, perhaps even a month. And we're remarkably adept at bouncing back from such strong displays of intense emotion. …Usually not an advantage, but in this case, perhaps we can make an exception."
He said it so softly, so seriously, that the stereotypical "life must go on" aspect of the moment quite left his speech. Certainly, Axel could not find the heart to comment sarcastically on it. He merely, for him, shrugged and said, "I guess. We'll have to see, won't we? There's no escaping that."
"Indeed."
Roxas said nothing.
The summons came a day later, once again, when they were all gathered, this time catching up on history and tales of a more innocent time of their childhoods apart. Axel happened to look up and saw Roxas's gaze swivel abruptly to the door. A moment later, the knock sounded upon it.
"So did the king send specifically you himself or did you volunteer for the job?"
Riku glanced at Axel. There was a shared confidence in their exchange now. They snipped, but during that one conversation, some mutual respect had apparently developed between the two of them. Not that either of them would state as much out loud, of course. "In this case, he sent me. But I would have offered myself for this task regardless even if he had not." He looked at them. "You may all come if you wish, as his Majesty requests."
Demyx and Zexion were going to tag along, no doubt about it, Axel reasoned. Both of them were too curious for their own good, Demyx for his songs, Zexion for his personal knowledge and his alone. And Axel himself… Well, he wasn't going to let Roxas go into this confrontation without his being there, he freely admitted that. Not that he didn't think Roxas could handle himself; it was just…well, Roxas could take care of himself just fine with anything magical or even physical, but emotionally…he was only sixteen and even less well-versed in this area than others of his age given…you know. So yes, no way in Hades was Axel letting him wander in by himself.
"Your Majesty?"
There was a pause and Axel felt Roxas press against him, stiffening.
"Riku, I told you; you don't have to call me that! You know what? In fact, I am telling you not to call me that. I was never this "your majesty" to you when we were kids and never as a teenager."
"No, then you were "your royal highness", Sora." Riku retorted dryly.
"You know what I mean. Is…did you bring…" The king's voice went hesitant.
"Yes, I did, y—Sora." Riku stepped fully into the room and turned halfway, beckoning the motley group in. They all waited, none of them directly urging Roxas on with their gaze, but waiting nonetheless. Roxas felt it; he had to have. He looked up. Axel nodded at him. "I'm right behind you, Roxy."
"Roxas. Not Roxy." His mouth quirked and he walked a little unsteadily in, the other three falling into line behind him. Of course, Axel was immediately after him.
The room was as he expected a royal bedroom to be in décor, with tapestries of rich shades and dazzling colors everywhere the eye roamed. The shock came in the form of the wispy cobwebs also strewn everywhere. Immediately upon entering the room, the mustiness choked their breaths away. Only Roxas seemed unaffected and even he looked up with a brief widening of the eyes at these unexpected hangings.
A sneeze came from the curtained bed as if on cue. Roxas stumbled over.
"I know; I know. The air's terrible in here." Sora scrunched up his face irritably. "But apparently I can't leave this bed for a while yet, so I can't get anyone to clean. I mean, I wouldn't mind them cleaning while I was sleeping or even just lying here awake, bored out of my mind. But you have servants not wanting to ruin my dignity or something by seeing me in my bedclothes. It's kind of silly, but there you are."
"I'm sorry." Roxas said quietly. Sora looked at him, actually looked at him this time. In astonishment. "You're sorry—why are you sorry? What in the world is there for you to be sorry for?"
Roxas shrugged a little, a small one-shouldered lift. He didn't look up, his eyes turned fixedly downwards. "That…you have to remain confined to bed. For…the things Mother did to you, to everyone." He paused. "Are you…do you hate me for killing her?"
"Wha—" Sora cut himself off with a sharp inhalation of breath. Roxas flinched and Axel tightened his grip on the boy's shoulders. He could see what Roxas refused to and that was the look of pure bewilderment in the king's eyes. He may be in his mid-thirties, but Sora was as innocent as a child in a way. Ah, well, like father, like son. Axel could read that wonder and interpret it correctly not as surprise at the news of his wife being dead by his son's hands. He already knew that. No, what shocked him was that Roxas would think-
"Roxas. Look at me, please?" When Roxas reluctantly, and after a long moment, raised his head slowly and met his father's gaze, Sora again gasped slightly. Axel again knew the feeling. Even now, he could not meet Roxas's eyes without a little thrill going through him at the glow that would light up his vision. Sora stared in awe.
"Sora?" Riku prompted him from his leaning station against the wall.
Sora shook himself visibly. "Sorry! Sorry, I—" His smile was surprisingly sweet and suddenly Axel could see the boy that Riku had described to him. A little naïve, a heart too big for this world, still living there behind the drawn cheeks and eyes just beginning to crinkle at the corners. And this boy looked a lot like Roxas.
"It's just…I can't believe it. Roxy, I could never hate you." Roxas's gaze had begun to slowly wander vaguely towards the floor again, but now he looked up sharply. Sora smiled at him. "I…I never got to know. I'm the one who should be sorry for that. But you're my son, Roxy. And I don't remember all that's happened, but I know Kai—she didn't treat you very well." His eyes clouded. "And for that I'm sorry, Roxas. I wish…I wish I could make up for all these years, when I never got to treat you like I always wanted to treat my son." His hand was far too frail for that of a man in the prime of his life when he withdrew it from under the covers and placed it on Roxas's. Roxas nearly jumped. He looked up and his breath quit on him. Those were tears in Sora's eyes as they looked at each other. But why…
"Forgive me, Roxas? For…for all the things I've never done for you. I promise I will try to make it up to you. Whatever you want, if I'm able to give it, I will."
"You don't have to," Roxas murmured.
Sora just looked at him. "Allow me to do this one thing for my son. Please."
"No!" Roxas's tone was vehement and he flushed when everyone glanced at him, startled. He lowered his voice to almost a whisper. "…please don't offer that to me. At least…not until I've told you…what I need to tell you."
"…okay?"
"None of us will interrupt you, prince," Riku interjected. He pushed himself away from the wall and walked forward. Yes, he had somewhat interrupted his royal Majesty, at the very least, spoken out of turn, but Sora did not seem to mind and Riku's expression dared anyone to comment. Axel was tempted to, just at that, but perhaps wisely chose to refrain.
Roxas felt the tug on his sleeve and half turned. Axel swept his hand across the unoccupied side of the divan and raised an eyebrow.
"You're more than welcome to sit, Roxas." Sora murmured amusedly from the bed.
Roxas sat and Axel watched with curiosity as he immediately brought his legs in close to his body and clasped his arms around them. He assumed this position, to the eye, entirely unconsciously. "I…I'm not sure where to begin." Roxas laughed suddenly, a little nervous chuckle. "I'm sorry. It's kind of laughable. I've been dreaming about this moment for such a long time, even years, and never really thought about what I would do if it happened." He paused and Axel saw the thought of fleeing cross his eyes fleetingly. "Maybe start with what you told us that night? About what you remember from your childhood." Axel prompted him quietly.
The boy glanced at him out of the corner of his eyes, and the brief glimpse of blue was more than enough to successfully convey his immense gratitude. "I guess." And he retold the tale that was now familiar to Axel and Demyx. But again as he did so, and more intensely this time, Axel saw again the memories unravel as if they belonged to his own mind as Roxas spoke. The darkness, the silence, the coldness, the fear. And then Roxas turned his story to even more familiar events, Axel and Demyx's own arrival, the events of the fateful night, the breaking of the enchantments, then, with the addition of Roxas himself and Zexion, the four's journey back to their city of origin. It was here that Roxas began a part that none of them were acquainted with before and Axel listened with interest.
"It…I had searched for many months for a way to defeat her…my mother's sorcery. I…she's had many hours to thrive in her reign and she had much power at her disposal. I didn't know how I could do it, me, untrained, young, untested. I just knew I had to. I was the only one who possibly could, and if I wasn't able to…" He said this without arrogance, without pride, just a simple statement of facts and even a touch of shame. "So I read. A lot. There were many books on sorcery, but nothing on…the raw magic that she possessed. And certainly nothing on how to best her. So I had to think. I didn't think that any runes or written spells could defeat her; she would be able to see the threads composing the spell immediately and rip them to shreds. …and when I broke her spells upon the castle in the air that confined me and the many she'd sent there over the years, I knew this to be confirmed. I…I did the same thing. And if I could do it, I knew that she could as well. It's the way our sorceries work. So I had to figure out what possibilities, if there were any, that would bewilder her abilities. That had to be immune to her touch. And that was it. Immune to her touch. I thought of it very late, already while we were on our way here. And I had very little time to prepare.
Father… you should know this, even if she had kept you under an enchantment for most of the years I've been in this world. She…it became tangible around her eventually. Even if she had all the power in the world, she could not have drawn that power from nothingness. The raw magic had to come from somewhere. And I had some help figuring out what to do from there. Axel."
Axel started.
"I…Aerith did help me at the critical moment. It seemed so obvious once I realized. She told me while we were talking that I was nothing like my mother. Nothing at all. I suppose she could've been merely reassuring me, but…I think she knew. She knew what those words would mean to me. I couldn't touch her with any of the same powers she possessed. So I had to draw on the source, a direct opposite to hers, something she could never touch, never put out."
Light. Of course. Axel said nothing still; he almost did, but this was Roxas's moment; he could not interrupt it.
"I know you're all thinking it now." Axel could have sworn Roxas's gaze flickered to his especially. "I took a simple charm, one that protected against evil spirits and other forces of darkness, and worked with it all the way. Normally, she would have shattered it like glass, torn apart the framework that held it up as soon as she bent her mind to it. Which is why I had to make her think it wasn't worth the effort. I used it to protect everyone and let her think that was a last gasp effort. And I lured her out of her body. And then I trapped her with light. Not permanently. She could have broken free with time and sacrifice." Roxas paused. "I could have killed her that way. I could have gathered all the light in the world and surrounded her with it, leaving her not even one shadowed corner to hide in. But then I would have unsettled the balance of the elements as she had, only in the opposite direction. And that would have been no better act than the one she had performed. So I couldn't kill her. I…I don't think I could have. Maybe. But we'll never know. So I sent her away. I…I can't explain how. I tried, to Zexion, and Demyx, and Axel earlier, and they didn't really understand…"
"It's okay, Roxas. Keep going if you don't think you can explain."
"She's still alive. …And I can't promise that she'll stay away forever. But for as long as I'm alive and reachable, she won't be able to bother this city."
Riku leaned forward, eyes bright with that feverish anxiety Axel had glimpsed the evening before. "But who is she? You're not speaking of Kairi, are you? Where is Kairi then? …or even where was, I suppose."
"Kairi…she was your friend, wasn't she?"
"…you said 'was'."
Roxas bowed his head. "I did. Kairi…I only know her now for the body she provided. A vessel. Best as I can tell, Kairi died years ago."
Both Riku and Sora shifted, but said nothing. Roxas glanced at each of them both in turn slowly before continuing softly. "I can't tell you how. I could maybe pull a lingering memory from what's left of her, but…it's been too long. Riku, is it? You went down last night after everything else was taken care of, didn't you?"
"I did." Riku hesitated. "She… I had to…"
"Once my mother's magic had left her, time began reasserting its authority, I think. She was little more than bones by the time you went down again, I should say." Roxas didn't look up, but Riku gave a curt nod anyway. "She died. Maybe of natural causes. I…I hope so. And…you all saw the incorporeal form that she could take on yesterday. Except, maybe…did you…Father?" He spoke the word hesitantly and trippingly. "One thing I don't know is how awake you were for all these years…especially towards the end."
Sora sat up, whined and pressed a hand to his forehead. Riku's outstretched hand gently waved him back down, and he did so reluctantly and slowly. "I…it all feels like a blur. I can remember little vague things, nothing really clearly. …oh, right. You were asking…no, I don't remember anything of yesterday until I was in the throne room and you were there and Kairi…Kairi's body was on the floor."
Roxas nodded. "My mother is old. She…she's lived beyond her rightful years, really. What remains of her now in this world, she keeps going through sorcery and coercion. But she couldn't keep her physical form long enough. Eventually, it rotted away to dust, and she could wander unbound by flesh. …no one can live without a body for long though. There's a reason souls don't go around wandering by themselves for centuries on end. Without a body, the mind tends to roam and very easily forget its physical place in its thinking. Too far, and the void takes you. The strong-willed can avoid this for longer than most, obviously, but even they end up lost in nothingness in the end. So she was probably in the vicinity when Kairi died and she seized the chance and caught up the soulless shell before death could fully claim it. And she lived in that form for sixteen, seventeen years until…until yesterday. She's out there somewhere. I don't know if she'll find herself a new body to control, or whether she'll…like I said. Lose herself before then."
They were silent. The eeriness of the unknown pervaded the room, as the unbidden thought of that vast, not even darkness, but nothingness swept before them.
"…wait. That means… Oh gods."
Their eyes turned to the countenance of the king. Riku turned sharply. "Sora?" Sora's face was turning a very visible unhealthy green. His eyes were wide. "Riku," he whispered pathetically. Riku softened his tone as he bent before his liege. "What is it, Sora? What's wrong?"
"That means…Kairi's been dead for fifteen years."
Riku's expression altered, turned to one of bewilderment. "Yes…Roxas just said that, Sora."
Sora waved his hands frantically. "No, don't you see what that means? We had Roxy! Which means she was pregnant! Kairi, or whoever. Roxas's mom. But she was in Kairi's body. Which means…"
Riku still had not wavered from that lost and confused look. "Yes. So? I don't understand what point you're trying to make."
Sora's voice lowered into a panicked whisper; little good that it did for all in the room could still clearly hear his next words. "Riku, that means I mated with Kairi and she was dead." He bit his lip. "I think I want a bath now, with that thought."
With that, the tension in the room snapped. Riku's face relaxed into relief and not without amusement. "Of course, Sora. If you wish." He gave the rest of them a stern look, all of whom were concealing various degrees of amusement. Even Zexion sported a wide smirk as Demyx, beside him, badly concealed his entire frame shaking with laughter. Axel did not even bother trying to hide his maniacal grin when Riku's scrutiny fell on him. Only Roxas looked somewhat close to composed, a tiny pursed smile the only sign that he found this entertaining in some form. Riku sighed. "Roxas? Anything else you can tell us then."
"…nothing urgent nor that relevant to what I've just told you, no."
Riku began to wave them off before his spine stiffened and he remembered himself. He turned back to the bed. "Sora, unless you have further things to…"
"I do! I remember!" Sora again sat up, slowing abruptly this time, a small frown crossing his face at the effort necessary. Riku reached out, but Sora waved him back. "Roxy? Can your old dad have a hug?"
Roxas's eyes went wide. Not obviously; Axel could only tell because he had practically memorized Roxas's every facial expression by now from close study. He nudged Roxas from behind. Go on. Roxas tottered a little as he walked the short distance to the bed. He was trembling as he leaned over. Sora's arms immediately swept around his neck and gripped him close.
For moments, Roxas remained tensely braced, ready to flinch. But his frame unexpectedly went liquid, and his own arms wrapped around his father's frail frame tightly. It was Sora who pulled away first and held him at arm's length. They stared at each other, father and son. Demyx and Zexion had to be seeing this as well, right? The similarity of their faces couldn't be striking only Axel just then. Placed side by side like that, the ethereal blueness of Roxas's outshone Sora's sky blue, warmer and more human than his son's but dimmer in comparison, much dimmer. Roxas seemed not very real, a glimpse of perfection that could blow away any second…
"Anything, you hear me? You just have to ask. You haven't convinced me that I should revoke that offer at all, Roxy."
For a moment, Roxas's face contorted. Not to an extreme, but enough to cause deep shadows below his eyes. A little stir of panic rose in Axel's throat. Nothing too drastic, but just a deep, unrelenting urge to wrap Roxas up and protect him from all that could possibly wish to harm the boy, should anyone even dare consider hurting him, keep all the tears away. In another second, Roxas's mouth trembled and fell lax again, his eyes opened naturally. "Thank you. …Dad."
Sora smiled at him. "Huh. Never ever thought about someone calling me that before. You don't have to ask now. Think about it."
"I will." Roxas pulled completely away, slowly. His expression was unreadable.
They were already halfway out the door when Sora, sitting bolt upright again from the sound of it, cried in a startled whisper, "Riku!"
"Yes, Sora?"
Axel hung back just to hear this; they all did.
"…I'm a dad. Gods above, I'm old! I'm thirty something now, aren't I, and I don't remember half of it!"
"Thirty-four. Rejoice. I'm thirty-five."
"Well, yeah, because you've always been old and grey. But Riku, I'm not supposed to be old and wrinkly! Not me."
This would have been tragic if not for the completely over the top horror Sora expressed in a hushed stage whisper. As it was, his reaction was hilarious. They didn't run, but they did walk very fast down the hallway, carefully avoiding looking at each other until sound could not carry anymore.
They had not spoken about a particular topic for a while. You shouldn't have to ask which particular topic this was. It wasn't really the awkwardness or the uncertainty, just that there had seemed no need to speak of it really…ok, Axel was entirely lying, at least for himself. He had no idea how Roxas felt about it.
Erm, hi. You know the hints of attraction I've been dropping you and I think you've been dropping for me as well? I really hope I'm not imagining these things. So…want to try going a little further now that you're done saving the world?
…no. Just no.
So, about that kiss.
No.
Axel slammed his head against a bedpost.
"Are you…should I come back later, Axel?"
"You're not interrupting anything constructive. Except maybe me making my skull a tad easier to break for any of my enemies."
"Well, I'll venture to say that that's not a very constructive pastime? Can't be healthy either." Roxas settled in front of him, legs crossed.
"Axel?" Said man blinked and quickly, and rather in a panic, reassured himself that he had not been staring directly at Roxas when he fell into his silent reverie. "I'm sorry, Roxas. I was…thinking."
"I didn't say anything. You just looked pensive."
"So, have you given more thought to your father's offer?"
"Yes." Roxas fidgeted, remnants of the adorable child that he must have been still there. "That's partly why I'm here. I wanted to tell you first. And maybe get your opinion."
"Go right ahead then. No guarantees I'll have any sagely wisdom."
Roxas might have rolled his eyes. It was hard to tell seeing as Axel shifted his gaze too late and only caught the tail end of the movement. "Sagely wisdom isn't exactly what I was looking for. So, um, I know I don't want gold or riches or anything like that."
"Pity. I hear the hearts of many a miser breaking at that."
"How heartless of me." Ok. That. That was definitely sarcasm. Axel grinned. "I'm being a bad influence on you, aren't I?"
"What do you mean?" Ah. Oh well. Still needed a little work.
"It's fine. Sorry; I interrupted you. Please, continue."
"I…long story short, I plan on asking him for the castle. Yes, the one I grew up in. I think I know how to move it and stop its movement, or at least alter its movement so it doesn't float further and further away from everything."
Axel blinked. "Why?"
"I…despite everything, I've realized that it feels awkward being away from it. It's been my home for years and it feels like home. Besides. Zexion would have a heart attack if I let all those books just float away."
"But…your mother…"
"She didn't build it, Axel. I don't know what people have been saying, and, yes, I know some of the rumors that have been spoken about me and the whole ordeal. But someone else put that library there. I guess she just didn't think I'd ever become much of a threat even with that at my disposal."
"But she thought wrong. Worst of luck to her. The memories won't bother you?"
"Memories can be overshadowed. There's still time to create more enjoyable ones in the place I call home. I…" Roxas then proceeded to mutter something rather quickly under his breath.
"Roxas, if whatever you just said was meant for my ears, know that I have human ears. Not ears adapted to hear the footsteps of an ant."
The prince flushed and raised his hand. He stopped mid-gesture. "I…alright, I'm not going to take the easy way out. I said…asked if you'd like to create them with me."
Axel's heart stopped. Not literally, calm down. It did skip a few pulses though, perhaps. A million things he could say bubbled up within his throat and perhaps, in other lives, each of them had received a tasting, but the one that he blurted out in this life was, "Easy way out?", the silliest, most irrelevant thing he could have seized upon, of course.
Whatever Roxas thought of that, none of his thoughts flying across his expression stayed long enough for Axel to catch. "I…almost just let the words echo closer to you so I wouldn't have to say them myself again. But you deserved more than that." He ventured a glance upwards and something he saw in Axel's face must have made him nervous for he began elaborating rather hurriedly. "It's…you don't have to live there if you don't want to. It's just, I'd at least like you to visit once in a while. But you once told me, maybe you don't remember, but one night when we were talking, you mentioned that you didn't really have any ties to a person or place and I wondered if you could—"
"Of course." Axel finally found his voice again. Or perhaps stole Roxas's, for at that same moment, the boy seemed to lose his. He parted his lips, closed them again, and just stared.
Once upon a time, when he'd seduced young maidens and fellows alike, he would not have missed this opportunity, not on his life. He would have immediately seized the moment and plundered conveniently slack lips that, really, never offered any protests. Not when he was giving them such intimate pleasure. He was halfway there.
"May I?" he whispered, and though he purposefully remained enough of a distance away that this should not have directly affected Roxas. Still, Roxas reacted as if he could actually feel Axel's face close to his, Axel's breath on his lips, and he shivered. "I…yes."
"I'm not initiating anything if you're at all unsure." Had anyone who'd met him before heard his words in that moment, their jaws would have dropped and their eyes popped out of their heads and gone rolling on the floor. Needless to say, none of these people did and thus a catastrophe of sorting out whose eyeballs were whose was averted.
"I'm sure." Some of the pink vanished from Roxas's face and throat, and Axel would have sworn that the next glance he threw at Axel was, at the very least, sly, if not coy. "I was not entirely out of my mind that night if that's what you were thinking."
"I thought no such thing!" Axel protested, and so it was that for the second time in history, Axel didn't initiate a kiss and he just barely escaped being interrupted and shut up for the first time by one.