Alright! Writing is back on! Here I go!

"You mean you know how this happened?!" Ranma shrieked, still in his girl form.

I scooted over behind Akane, putting my hands on her shoulders as I nodded. We'd just gotten back to the Tendo Dojo after finishing mopping up the puddles in the school hallway and Akane had just finished explaining Ranma's condition to me… and it sounded like an old horror story from my planet.

"I have a strong idea, anyway," I said. "It is said that there was once a mad scientist on Oniboshi. He liked to tamper with DNA and turn people into creatures. The problem was none of the creatures he tested his theories on ever survived the tests…"

Ranma and Ryoga stiffened, their skin going white, looking as though they were freezing up. I wasn't entirely sure why they did so, but I kept on with the story. "Though he was threatened many a time and he was forced out of the laboratory, he continued his work. The day he was finally put to death for his crimes, he kept screaming that he had 'finally done it' and that he had 'found a creature strong enough to withstand the changes in its DNA'. No one could ever find that dangerous formula… I guess we know why, now."

Akane turned all the way around to face me, her expression deeply concerned, now. "Mori-chan… are you saying that Ranma will die if this isn't reversed?" she asked.

I shook my head. "I mean to say that humans are the creatures strong enough to withstand the changes in their DNA." I said. "Otherwise, he would have died within three days of becoming a woman."

Ranma and Ryoga slowly slumped down to the floor, looking terrified. Akane mimicked them, heaving a relieved sigh, leaning back and propping herself up on her hands. I looked at all the people slumping around me and decided to copy Akane, wondering if this was some form of Human custom.

"Ne… Mori…" Ranma said. "If this really is some kind of alien chemical… can you make a cure for it?"

I looked over at him/her, giving the idea some thought. "I do not know." I answered. "I have never heard of anyone making a cure for it, as I have never heard of any survivors of the DNA tampering and no one ever found out what planet the scientist sent the remains of his formula to. Chemistry was never one of my better skills, either."

Ranma and Ryoga rolled up to sit, looking at me with very serious faces. "But you can definitely try, right?" Ranma asked.

"Yeah. If you can get a hold of the right chemicals, you can try to make a cure, right?" Ryoga asked.

I looked back and forth between them, straightening up a bit. "Well… I suppose…" I said.

"Then it's settled!" Ryoga said. "We'll do whatever you ask, as long as you can promise to make that cure!"

Ranma nodded in agreement.

I wasn't entirely sure what to say. I can't do it? I can't guarantee the results? I might blow the house up?
I could've said any of that… but I didn't. "You mean to say… You will help me get home if I can make a cure for this chemical?" I asked.

They both nodded.

"Aren't you going to need some kind of alien chemicals to 'try' to make the cure?" Akane asked, sounding a bit skeptical.

I looked at her. "Actually, if I remember all my language studies correctly, I have seen some of the chemicals I would need listed in the ingredients in various products you humans purchase at the 'grocery store'." I said. "If I have some of those items, I can begin experimenting."

Her face was a strange one… like she was trying to smile but not really trying to smile. Her posture suggested that she was uncomfortable… I couldn't quite tell what made her so.

"It's settled, then!" Ranma said. "Start your list! Leave the shopping to me and Ryoga!"

They were rather impatient with me as I wrote very slowly. I wasn't quite sure of all the characters, but I wrote the first ones that looked correct and let them run away with my list. Akane sighed heavily, patting me on my shoulder. "I hope you know what you're getting into." she said. "This could end badly, if you don't."

I stiffened, not entirely sure what she was talking about, but not liking the way she spoke about it. Only time would teach me exactly what Akane already knew…

Almost two Earth weeks later…

"Come on! Before the sun rises would be nice!" Ranma hissed down from a high window in the school building.

"Shut up! I'll have her up in a second!" Ryoga growled.

I looked at Ryoga as he knelt down in front of me and folded his hands together by my feet. "Hold on to that formula." Ryoga said. "Tuck your head down as you get up there. If Ranma doesn't catch you, I will and we'll try again, alright?"

I nodded, carefully stepping on his hands. He held firm, not giving an inch as I allowed my weight to rest in his hands. I said nothing at the time, but, to be honest, I was impressed. I didn't know many men who were that strong.

"Ready?" He asked me.

"Ready!" Ranma called down impatiently.

Ryoga looked up at me. I gripped the jars in my arms a bit tighter and gave a little nod.

"On three. And don't forget to tuck your head once you're up!" Ryoga said.

"Wakatteimasu." I said, my muscles beginning to tense up, prepared for what was coming.

"Alright." He said. "Ichi… ni… san!"

I tucked my head down as Ryoga launched me up into the air. I swung my weight in toward the building and felt Ranma catch me and something odd collided with my head. He stumbled as he pulled me inside and almost dropped me on the floor as he collapsed. "Ranma-san, please, be careful!" I hissed. "This formula is delicate! The smallest contamination, such as the chemicals used to clean this floor, could cause it to explode and then it won't be of any use to us."

Ranma groaned, rubbing his suddenly bruised chin as he sat up. "Never mind that, if it explodes, there might not be any 'us' left to be of use to!" Ranma said. "Get to the chemistry lab already!"

"Let Ryoga know which alien activity sightings he's supposed to search out, alright?" I said.

"Yeah, yeah." Ranma said.

I nodded to him and hurried over to the chemistry lab. I slipped inside, being careful not to drop the jars in my arms as I handled the door and went to the table. I put the jars down and quickly put on some gloves, a mask and goggles, and pulled out the tools and other chemicals I needed. I gently un-capped the jars and began adding new chemicals little by little. A little of this… A bit more of that… anything that I'd ever heard of in a DNA altering solution.
After a time, my hands began to quiver a bit. The formula was in such a delicate state now, I couldn't afford to over-add any chemicals by even a little bit. Even sounds could undo this whole thing. I fought to be calm, though. After all, everything was going well. We'd managed to get into the school and no one had caught us yet. Not to mention, I was almost done here. There would be just one more three-day aging period and then it would be ready to test.

Easy now! Easy now! Easy now! My head was screaming. Don't slip! Don't slip! Don't slip! The hair is all you need after this!

My hand quivered ever so slightly as I finally squeezed out one single drop of 'soy sauce' from the drop-measure. The drop fell in and I watched the brown of the soy sauce swirl around with the blue mixture I'd made over the last few days. As the soy sauce faded away, I carefully released my held breath and checked my outfit for the locks of hair I'd gotten from Ranma and Ryoga. That was the last ingredient I needed in either jar and then all of this would be over… if I could only find the hair.

Why isn't it here? Where could it have gone? I asked myself. My pockets are shallow but tight! Nothing can get out!

A light began to spread across the desk. I looked up to see that the door was opening. No figures were present just yet, but, I was certain I'd secured the door. Someone was there and trying to conceal their identity, for the time being. All at once, I began remembering some warnings Ranma and Akane gave me before I came to this school. Things they told me to scream about, should they come to pass:

One: Something (anything) goes missing when you're certain you had it.

I checked all possible hiding places on my person and found nothing. That hair was nowhere to be found.

Two: You see a pair of scissors where one of your own items used to be.

Casting my eyes over at the table, I saw an odd-looking metal object, seemingly a blade of some sort.

What's this? I asked myself, cautiously reaching to pick up the object. Looking around as I lifted it from the table, I noticed that one of the beakers I'd emptied was missing. By now, my skin was growing cold and my limbs were trembling even more than before.

Three: You hear a laugh like no other creature in the universe can produce (Akane: If you hear it, you RUN while you scream!) (Ranma: And hold onto your head. That's the first thing he'll go for.).

I jumped, hearing a small sound from just outside. A bizarre, eerily slow laugh was echoing from somewhere nearby. As I brought my gaze over to look directly across the classroom from me, I saw a figure slowly approaching me.
"Miss Alien... School hours are over for today. Breaking in at this hour is very naughty of you!" came a very strange voice.

I cast a brief glance at the unstable formula I'd created, glowing and fizzing as it awaited the final ingredient. At this point, it didn't look like I would get to add it and the formula would simply implode on its own. It was done no matter what happened, now. If that's the case, then… I thought to myself. Oh! Please forgive me, Ranma-san! Ryoga-san! I couldn't cure you this time…

I brought my gaze back to the approaching shadow, as it revealed itself to be a very strange looking human man wearing what Ryoga had called 'tourist clothes' while we were passing through an Earth beach on our way here. Was this truly the person Ranma and Akane had warned me of? There was no real telling for me. But, I had been given orders in case of one stranger showing up. So, whether he was the one or not, I was to follow through. So, my muscles tensed up and I turned to face the exit door, taking a very deep breath. "Ra… n… ma… SSSSAAAAANNNN!" I shrieked with all my power.

Ne – Hey (call for attention).

Wakatteimasu – I understand.

Ichi – One.

Ni – Two.

San – Three.

Gah… I hate this. No one's even coming to see this story… I got a little lazy when writing in Principal Kuno's accent, but, I figured I did alright. Tell me what you think. Please, review!