Author's Note: This is my take on Edward's version of the some, okay - most, (all right - all) of the events that take place in Stephenie Meyer's "Eclipse". Due to this, all dialogue and conversations from the book, for which Edward and Bella are present together, have been faithfully incorporated exactly the way they appear in Stephenie Meyer's brilliant work of fiction. I also incorporated dialogue between Bella and and other characters for which Edward is either present or eavesdropping.
By the way, I truly appreciate the feedback I have received on my stories. Please keep it up. I live for reviews. Okay, I'm kidding. But really, any and all comments are welcome.
This 11th Chapter is called "History". It's based on Chapter 13, where it is called "Newborn". In it, Jasper tells Bella his story, and the Cullens theorize, plot and plan. There is a bit of extra fluff that I added at the end. Let me know if you like it. I have broken the 10,000 word barrier, so I apologize for the length of this chapter.
As before, I translated and expanded on a lot of emotions for Edward as they are described by Bella in Eclipse, though I thought that perhaps her perception of Edward's feelings, and reasons for doing something, may not always be accurate. So, if you read something in this story that doesn't make sense to you - please remember, it could be because that's how I see him. I may be completely wrong!! Also, while Bella's emotions are clearly described in the books (as she lives them), because Edward can't hear her mind, I have in some rare instances chosen to change the emotions to what I thought he might perceive. I also used, where applicable, other information gleaned from Stephenie's novels, her website, and additional data readily available on many websites dedicated to the Twilight series.
Disclaimer: This story is simply fan fiction. All rights to the Twilight series, the books, the characters, and anything related to Twilight, are exclusively owned by Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.
Thank you!
11. History
Morning.
"The same thing that happened to your hand," Jasper replied in a quiet, pained voice. "Repeated a thousand times."
He laughed once, mournfully, and ran his hand over his exposed arm. My eyes were still glued to Bella's face. Her eyes were wide, staring at the angry crescents zigzagging across Jasper's skin. Her expression was horrified. Her mouth hung open. Her heartbeat was picking up speed.
I felt her terror through Jasper's mind. "Our venom is the only thing that leaves a scar," he explained her unspoken question. He didn't mention the pain he endured receiving those bites.
I'd never been bitten by another vampire myself. I could only imagine what it felt like. Even Jasper's thoughts were not sufficient to truly understand the horror of what he had gone through.
"Why?" Bella breathed.
Alice concentrated harder on her love for Jasper, and he picked up the feelings emanating from her. "I love you, Jazz, I'm here, I love you. It's okay, Sweetheart, it's okay."
"I didn't have quite the same... upbringing as my adopted siblings here." His voice turned to stone. "My beginning was something else entirely."
Bella stared at him, open-mouthed, her expression appalled. I read the feelings through Jasper.
He shot a quick glance at me. "Gently," I mouthed. He nodded, invisible to Bella.
"Before I tell you my story," he continued, "you must understand that there are places in our world, Bella, where the life span of the never-aging is measured in weeks, and not centuries."
At this point, Carlisle and Emmett refocused on the TV, while Esme started the same chant in her mind as Alice. "We love you, Jasper, we love you."
Alice moved to the couch and sat down in front of Esme's legs, and reached up for Esme's hand. I kept my eyes on Bella.
"To really understand why, you have to look at the world from a different perspective. You have to imagine the way it looks to the powerful, the greedy... the perpetually thirsty."
Bella's eyes were glued to Jasper's face.
"You see, there are places in this world that are more desirable to us than others. Places where we can be less restrained, and still avoid detection. Picture, for instance, a map of the wester hemisphere. Picture on it every human life as a small red dot. The thicker the red, the more easily we – well, those of us who exist this way – can feed without attracting notice."
I saw the shudder go through Bella's body at the last few words, and quickly glanced at Jasper. I was suddenly anxious. "Please," I mouthed at him.
"Not that the covens in the South care much for what the humans notice or not. It's the Volturi," the respect in his voice was audible, "that keep them in check. They are the only ones the southern covens fear. If not for the Volturi, the rest of us would be quickly exposed."
Bella frowned. I could imagine why. Her short history with the Volturi had to make her wonder at the grateful tone in Jasper's voice. He was right, of course. They usually took decisive care of this kind of mess, and only my fear for Bella's humanity made me anxious at a visit from them. Jasper picked up on both Bella's confusion, and my anxiety.
"I'm sorry, Edward, but she has got to understand this." He'd misread my emotion, not knowing the reason behind it.
"It's okay," I whispered, outside of Bella's earshot.
"The North is, by comparison, very civilized. Mostly we are nomads here who enjoy the day as well as the night, who allow humans to interact with us unsuspectingly – anonymity is important to us all."
And then there was my family. And Tanya's coven up in Denali. We knew of no others who lived the way we did.
"It's a different world in the South. The immortals there come out only at night. They spend the day plotting their next move, or anticipating their enemy's. Because it has been war in the South, constant war for centuries, with never one moment of truce. The covens there barely note the existence of humans, except as soldiers notice a herd of cows by the wayside – food for the taking. They only hide from the notice because of the Volturi."
Bella was still confused. It was so much easier to read her face when I could hear her emotions through Jasper. I wished again that I could simply hear her. I'd have been extraordinarily grateful if I could've heard her thoughts just this once. "But what are they fighting for?" she asked him.
Jasper smiled, pleased at the question. "Remember the map with the red dots?"
She nodded.
"They fight for control of the thickest red." The cities with the highest population. The cities with the highest number of vagrants, the poor, the people nobody would miss if they disappeared.
"You see, it occurred to someone once that, if he were the only vampire in, let's say Mexico City, well then, he could feed every night, twice, three times, and no one would ever notice. He plotted ways to get rid of the competition."
Jasper glanced at me again, before continuing. "Others had the same idea. Some came up with more effective tactics than others. But the most effective tactic was invented by a fairly young vampire named Benito. The first anyone ever heard of him he came down from somewhere north of Dallas and massacred the two small covens that shared the area near Houston."
Bella flinched. I quickly glared at Jasper. "Please," I mouthed. "Please use less descriptive words."
He complied. "Two nights later, he took on the much stronger clan of allies that claimed Monterrey in northern Mexico. Again, he won."
"How did he win?" she asked, curiosity and wariness in her voice, as well as in her feelings, which I could read compliment of Jasper.
"Benito had created an army of newborn vampires. He was the first one to think of it, and in the beginning, he was unstoppable. Very young vampires are volatile, wild, and almost impossible to control. One newborn can be reasoned with, taught to restrain himself, but then, fifteen together are a nightmare. They'll turn on each other as easily as on the enemy you point them at. Benito had to keep making more as they fought amongst themselves, and as the covens he decimated took more than half his force down before they lost."
I wondered if Bella was thinking about her choice at this moment, perhaps thinking that possibly she'd gotten a glimpse of her own future. Not that I would let her be like that. She knew that, too. If I had to take her to Antarctica and feed on penguins for a year, I would. She trusted me to keep her from killing a human, and I would not betray her trust.
I had stopped listening for a moment, and Jasper had already moved on. "They're incredibly powerful physically, for the first year or so, and if they're allowed to bring strength to bear they can crush and older vampire with ease. But they are slaves to their instincts, and thus predictable. Usually, they have no skill in fighting, only muscle and ferocity. And in this case, overwhelming numbers."
I grimaced. If this was really what we were dealing with in Seattle, we were already outnumbered. We would need help. Jasper had estimated their number at ten or more. And none of them was worried about staying inconspicuous. We, on the other hand, would have to be. I wondered briefly if we could contact Peter and Charlotte to help us. Peter also knew quite well how to deal with newborns.
"... they did the only thing they could think of to counteract Benito. They made armies of their own... All hell broke loose – and I mean that more literally than you can possibly imagine. We immortals have our histories, too, and this particular war will never be forgotten. Of course, it was not a good time to be human in Mexico, either."
Bella shuddered again, and Jasper felt my sudden anger. Did he truly have to be so explicit? "Sorry, Edward, but she has got to understand." I glared at him. He ignored me then.
"When the body count reached epidemic proportions – in fact, your histories blame a disease for the population slump – the Volturi finally stepped in. The entire guard came together and sought out every newborn in the bottom half of North America. Benito was entrenched in Puebla, building his army as quickly as he could in order to take on the prize – Mexico City. The Volturi started with him, and then moved on to the rest.
"Anyone who was found with the newborns was executed immediately, and, since everyone was trying to protect themselves from Benito, Mexico was emptied of vampires for a time."
A very short time. Less than a decade later, the immortals were already back, reestablishing territories.
"The Volturi were cleaning house for almost a year. This was another chapter of our history that will always be remembered, though there were very few witnesses left to speak of what it was like. I spoke to someone once who had, from a distance, watched what had happened when they visited Culiacan."
I flinched at the mental pictures, though I had seen them before. Jasper shuddered in sheer horror, remembering the fearsome cruelty and gruesomeness of the Volturi's decisive actions.
No one had been allowed to live. They had ripped a ferocious trail of destruction through the area, pulling immortal after immortal from their hiding holes, and without fail, tearing them to pieces. The shrill screams of pain had been deafening even to vampire ears. Body parts were heaped onto piles outside of the town and burned to ash. The stench and smoke from the fires had produced a haze that covered the area for days.
Jasper took a breath and continued with this story. "It was enough that the fever for conquest did not spread from the South. The rest of the world stayed sane. We owe the Volturi for our present way of life. But when the Volturi went back to Italy, the survivors were quick to stake their claims in the South. It didn't take long before covens began to dispute again. There was a lot of bad blood, if you'll forgive the expression. Vendettas abounded."
Revenge was a very common emotion for an immortal, and not one that was easily overcome. We never forgave the loss of our mates.
"The idea of newborns was already there, and some were not able to resist. However, the Volturi had not been forgotten, and the southern covens were more careful this time. The newborns were selected from the human pool with more care, and given more training. They were used circumspectly, and the humans remained, for the most part, oblivious. Their creators gave the Volturi no reason to return."
Bella's eyes were still on Jasper, her face contorted with the horror she had just heard. I wished I could take her into my arms, and comfort her, but Jasper was right. She had to hear this.
"The wars resumed, but on a smaller scale. Every now and then, someone would go too far, and the Volturi would return and clean out the city. But they let the others, the careful ones, continue... "
And there was a reason for it, something I had seen in Aro's mind while we were in Volterra. When he'd thought of Carlisle, and the life he'd built for himself, Aro had been not only greedy, but also worried. He'd thought back to the southern wars, and I had briefly seen the reason why the careful covens had been allowed to continue the fighting. It prevented them from growing too large, too bonded. Aro didn't like competition. He'd tried to suppress the thoughts, knowing that I would pick them right out of his head, but I had seen them nonetheless.
Jasper stared at nothing. In his mind, he was reliving the last few moments of his humanity; the dim, blurry memories he had purposefully kept from fading completely.
Bella understood his vacant gaze. "That's how you were changed," she whispered, her face full of compassion for the pain on Jasper's face.
"Yes," he confirmed her question, "when I was human, I lived in Houston, Texas. I was almost seventeen years old when I joined the Confederate Army in 1861. I lied to the recruiters and told them I was twenty. I was tall enough to get away with it."
I kept watching Bella's face. This particular part of the story wasn't quite as horrifying, but I still tensed. I wanted him to leave out the actual pain of the transformation. The searing fire had burned through all of us for three long days. It was one of our earliest memories. He was telling her about meeting his creator, a vampire named Maria, drawing on all of the details he remembered. His last moment as Major Jasper Whitlock, when she'd inclined her head, and he'd thought she was going to kiss him. Instead, he'd felt her teeth at his throat.
My tension grew and he could feel it. I tried to catch his eye. "Don't mention the pain," I whispered so low that Bella didn't stand a chance of hearing it. He again nodded imperceptibly and paused at that moment. I was very grateful.
He skipped over the part I'd feared, and went on to tell Bella about the plan that Maria had come up with to regain her territories. How he'd received extra training, extra rewards when he'd done well. I grimaced when I saw the understanding of what he meant by those rewards wash over Bella's face, but I was glad that he had edited out the actual words. He'd been rewarded with human blood, quite often.
Maria had been pleased with his skill at combat. Eventually, she'd put him in charge of the newborns, and his talent of effectively controlling the emotions of those around him had helped him tremendously to keep them as tame as possible. The newborns had cooperated like never before, and Maria's territories had grown to cover most of Texas and northern Mexico in just the first year. It was a grand testament to Jasper's military skills and training.
The fighting had intensified as other covens came up from southern Mexico to overthrow her. Worries abounded that the Volturi would return, and Maria and Jasper were slowly dislodged, but managed to hold on to Monterrey. Eventually, the idea of conquest had dissipated, and most of the wars were rooted in vengeance alone.
Bella's eyes did not leave Jasper's face. Her mouth was slightly open while she listened intently. Her breathing was shallow, her heartbeat fast, but steady. Her feelings ranged from horror to shock to compassion for his suffering.
Jasper had arrived at another gruesome part of his story. "Maria and I always kept a dozen or so newborns ready. They meant little to us – they were pawns, they were disposable. When they outgrew their usefulness, we did dispose of them. My life continued in the same violent pattern and the years passed. I was sick of it all for a very long time before anything changed... "
Jasper had developed a conscience – an outstanding feat, though completely subconsciously, considering the violence and blood lust with which he had lived. He was growing depressed, tired of living his life this way. It was during this time that he'd met his friend Peter.
I could empathize with the depression. I knew the feeling well. In the few years when I had defied Carlisle's rules for our peaceful existence, it hadn't taken me long to feel the prick of my conscience at so much human life taken. Though I'd only hunted those humans that hunted others, I'd realized that I was, in effect, playing God. I wasn't immune from the depression.
I had gladly recommitted myself to his vision, and he had received me like the prodigal son, though I hadn't deserved his forgiveness. I tried to emulate him in everything I did, and often failed miserably. If at the end of eternity, I could be half the man Carlisle was, I would consider my life well spent.
"And then it was time to purge again. The newborns were outgrowing their strength; they were due to be replaced. Peter was supposed to help me dispose of them. We took them aside individually, you see, one by one..." He thankfully skipped over the gruesomeness of the disposal, but I could see on Bella's face, that yet again, she understood perfectly.
In the background, I could still hear Alice and Esme chanting in their minds. It kept Jasper from being overwhelmed by the memories. Rosalie had sat down in Emmett's lap, attempting to distract him, while he and Carlisle were still watching the news.
"It was always a long night. This time, he tried to convince me that a few had potential, but Maria had instructed that we get rid of them all. I told him no. We were about halfway through, and I could feel that it was taking a great toll on Peter. I was trying to decide whether or not I should send him away and finish up myself as I called out the next victim. To my surprise, he was suddenly angry, furious. I braced for whatever his mood might foreshadow – he was a good fighter, but he was never a match for me." Jasper took a breath. "I think she'll understand this part easily, Edward," he quickly glanced at me. Bella didn't notice – it was too fast.
"The newborn I'd summoned was a female, just past her year mark. Her name was Charlotte. His feelings changed when she came into view; they gave him away. He yelled for her to run, and he bolted after her. I could have pursued them, but I didn't. I felt... averse to destroying him. Maria was irritated with me for that... "
Jasper sighed. "Five years later, Peter snuck back for me. He picked a good day to arrive. Maria was mystified by my ever-deteriorating frame of mind. She'd never felt a moment's depression, and I wondered why I was different. I began to notice a change in her emotions when she was near me – sometimes there was fear... and malice – the same feelings that had given me advance warning when Nettie and Lucy struck. I was preparing myself to destroy my only ally, the core of my existence, when Peter returned."
His story was finally getting to the part which put him on the road to Alice. His mate. Her very first vision after waking up to the new life had been of Jasper.
"Peter told me about his new life with Charlotte, told me about options I'd never dreamed I had. In five years, they'd never had a fight, though they met many others in the north. Others who could co-exist without the constant mayhem. In one conversation, he had me convinced. I was ready to go, and somewhat relieved I wouldn't have to kill Maria. I'd been her companion for as many years as Carlisle and Edward have been together, yet the bond between us was nowhere near as strong When you live for the fight, for the blood, the relationships you form are tenuous and easily broken. I walked away without a backward glance."
He'd traveled with Peter and Charlotte for a few years, becoming acclimated to the more peaceful life, but he'd been unable to shake his depression. In fact, it had gotten worse.
"I didn't understand what was wrong with me, until Peter noticed that it was always worse after I'd hunted. I contemplated that. In so many years of slaughter and carnage, I'd lost nearly all of my humanity. I was undeniably a nightmare, a monster of the grisliest kind. Yet each time I found another human victim, I would feel a faint prick of remembrance for that other life. Watching their eyes widen in wonder at my beauty, I could see Maria and the others in my head, what they had looked like to me that last night that I was Jasper Whitlock. It was stronger for me – this borrowed memory – than it was for anyone else, because I could feel everything my prey was feeling. And I lived their emotions as I killed them."
He paused for just a second, focusing his gaze on Bella, whose eyes were locked on his face.
"You've experienced the way I can manipulate the emotions around myself, Bella, but I wonder if you realize how the feelings in a room affect me. For the first century of my life, I lived in a world of bloodthirsty vengeance. Hate was my constant companion. It eased some when I left Maria, but I still had to feel the horror and fear of my prey. It began to be too much."
He took another deep breath, as Bella's face transformed itself again from horror to utter compassion. Her brows were furrowed, and her eyes conveyed the sadness she felt for his suffering. Jasper picked up on it right away. He almost smiled. "Bella is truly one of a kind, Edward." I completely agreed.
He forged ahead. "The depression got worse, and I wandered away from Peter and Charlotte. Civilized as they were, they didn't feel the same aversion I was beginning to feel. They only wanted peace from the fight. I was so wearied by killing – killing anyone, even mere humans. Yet, I had to keep killing. What choice did I have? I tried to kill less often, but I would get too thirsty and I would give in. After a century of instant gratification, I have found self-discipline... challenging. I still haven't perfected that."
At this point, his expression turned desolate, and he was thinking of Bella's last birthday party. Ashamed of his actions that night, frustrated that he didn't have better control. "Edward, I'm so sorry, so very sorry. I wish I could take it back, I wish I could tell her myself."
The feelings he read from Bella were still utter compassion. She had long forgiven him, as I had. I wished he would forgive himself. "I forgave you, Jasper. It's all right," I mouthed to him.
He was thinking of Alice now, and quickly glanced at his love. His mouth turned up into a peaceful smile. "I was in Philadelphia. There was a storm, and I was out during the day – something I was not completely comfortable with yet. I knew standing in the rain would attract attention, so I ducked into a little half-empty diner. My eyes were dark enough that no one would notice them, though this meant I was thirsty, and that worried me a little. She was there – expecting me, naturally." He chuckled at the memory of seeing Alice's face for the first time.
"She hopped down from the high stool at the counter as soon as I walked in and came directly toward me."
Alice got off the floor and slowly walked over to stand behind Bella. Esme stopped her chanting, knowing that Jasper was past the horrors of his story, and focused her attention on Carlisle, and the TV.
"It shocked me. I was not sure if she meant to attack. That's the only interpretation of her behavior my past had to offer. But she was smiling. And the emotions that were emanating from her were like nothing I'd ever felt before."
He'd fallen in love that instant, unthinkingly, unknowingly, instinctively. Like we all had. "'You've kept me waiting a long time,' she said."
Alice laughed. "And you ducked your head, like a good Southern gentleman, and said 'I'm sorry, ma'am.'"
Jasper's return smile was full of love. I was smiling, too. "You held out your hand, and I took it without stopping to make sense of what I was doing. For the first time in almost a century, I felt hope." He took her hand into his, both of them reliving the memory.
Alice grinned. "I was just relieved. I thought you were never going to show." For a long moment, they simply stared at each other, and all I could hear from either one was the intense love they shared.
Bella's face was more relaxed now; she seemed glad that Jasper's story had taken such a wondrous turn for the better. He broke his visual connection with Alice, and returned his gaze to Bella.
"Alice told me what she'd seen of Carlisle and his family. I could hardly believe that such an existence was possible. But Alice made me optimistic. So we went to find them."
And find us, they did. I wasn't home when they got to our house. We were living outside of Chesterfield in New York State, right in the middle of the Adirondack mountains at the time, where the Great Lakes pushed cloudy days our way on a fairly consistent basis. The wildlife was plentiful, and Carlisle had been working at the local hospital.
I rolled my eyes at Jasper. He'd left out quite a bit. "Scared the hell out of them, too,"I said, turning to Bella, while Alice giggled. "Emmett and I were away hunting. Jasper shows up, covered in battle scars, towing this little freak," I nudged Alice to emphasize my point, "who greets them all by name, knows everything about them, and wants to know which room she move into." I grinned.
Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie had been utterly flabbergasted and frightened. Cell phones hadn't been invented yet, so they couldn't even call us to come home. When Emmett and I returned, we'd been in for quite a surprise.
Alice and Jasper were both laughing mirthfully by this time. "When I got home, all my things were in the garage." I'd no longer had a room of my own until Esme had renovated the third floor attic, which then became my room and an office for herself. The week it had taken to get that accomplished had been quite miserable – like living out of a suitcase, almost. I hadn't been very happy, but we'd spent most of that time talking to the two of them, finding out about them as much as possible.
Alice shrugged. "Your room had the best view." I snorted, but couldn't suppress my mirth, and we were all laughing together at the comical memories.
"That's a nice story," Bella said out of the blue. The laughter died on our lips. What? The three of us glanced at each other before focusing on her, our thoughts in tune. Was she deranged? Perhaps I should have asked Carlisle to evaluate her mental health after all.
"I meant the last part," she explained when she saw the incredulity in our eyes. "The happy ending with Alice."
Oh. "Alice has made all the difference," Jasper nodded. "This is a climate I enjoy."
Alice's eyes had glazed over for a second. "An army," she whispered, her voice strained. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Carlisle and Emmett were also paying attention now, as were Esme and Rosalie. We were all looking at Jasper, hoping he'd be able to make sense of this madness. "I thought I must be interpreting the signs incorrectly. Why would someone create an army in Seattle? There is no history there, no vendetta. It makes no sense from a conquest standpoint, either; no one claims it. Nomads pass through, but there's no one to fight for it. No one to defend it from."
His eyes swept across our faces. "But I've seen this before, and there's no other explanation. There is an army of newborn vampires in Seattle. Fewer than twenty, I'd guess. The difficult part is that they are totally untrained. Whoever made them just set them loose. It will only get worse, and it won't be much longer till the Volturi step in. Actually, I'm surprised they've let this go on so long."
So was I. This was unprecedented. An theory began to form in my mind, a reason slowly coming to the surface. Listening to Jasper's story had loosened a thread of thought, that I had previously not considered. There was one coven in the area that would justify someone creating a newborn army. Us.
"What can we do?" Carlisle asked. "I really don't want us involved in this, but it sounds like we no longer have a choice."
"If we want to avoid the Volturi's involvement, we will have to destroy the newborns, and we will have to do it very soon," Jasper answered, his voice as hard as his face. The realization disturbed him greatly – he didn't want to relive his own history. "I can teach you how. It won't be easy in the city. The young ones aren't concerned with secrecy, but we will have to be. It will limit us in ways that they are not. Maybe we can lure them out."
My voice was bleak as I shared my hypothesis. "Maybe we won't have to," I said quietly, my mind running through the repercussions of what I had just discovered. "Does it occur to anyone else that the only possible threat in the area that would call for the creation of an army is... us?"
The thoughts starting flying around me. Jasper's eyes narrowed. "You may be right," he thought, suddenly anxious. "I hadn't thought of that, Edward. But we don't live that way. Why would anyone feel the need to build an army to take something we don't even want?" I was with him on that, to an extent. I hadn't been able to think of a reason for it.
Carlisle's eyes were wide. He was shocked at my revelation. "But why? What can we do?"
Emmett was very plain in his reaction. "Well, shit. That puts a damper on things. There's too many of them. This will be much trickier than I'd thought."
Rosalie was a mixture of fear and fierce determination. "I will not allow anything to happen to Emmett. We'll leave if necessary."
And then there was Esme, reluctant to accept the truth of my words. "Tanya's family is also near."
"The newborns aren't ravaging Anchorage, Esme," I dismissed her words instantly. Besides, there were only five of them in Denali, and only one with any offensive talent. "I think we have to consider the idea that we are the targets."
"They're not coming after us," Alice insisted, and then a flash in her mind made her falter. She continued after a moment, thinking about these sudden inconclusive visual flashes. "Or... they don't know that they are. Not yet."
I was instantly tensed. This was new. I hadn't seen these fluttering bits and pieces before. "What is that?" I asked her. "What are you remembering?"
"Flickers," she answered, staring at me. "I can't see a clear picture when I try to see what's going on, nothing concrete. But I've been getting these strange flashes. Not enough to make sense of. It's as if someone's changing their mind, moving from one course of action to another so quickly that I can't get a good view... "
"It's almost like when you ran off to Italy, Edward. I only got bits and pieces while you kept changing your mind, until you decided on your final action."
Her thoughts triggered yet another epiphany. Fury engulfed me and a growl escaped my lips. "Not indecision," I snarled. "Knowledge. Someone who knows you can't see anything until the decision is made. Someone who is hiding from us. Playing with the holes in your vision."
There was a good possibility that the Volturi were involved in this after all. They were betraying us. I could imagine Aro, or even Caius, in my mind's eye, sending an unknown vampire to Seattle, explaining how Alice's visions worked, and preventing her from seeing and warning us.
Heaven help us.
"Who would know that?" she whispered, anxiously staring at my face.
Intense guilt joined the fury raging inside me. This was all my fault. If I hadn't so stupidly run off to Italy after Rosalie's phone call, this would have never happened. My voice was cold. "Aro knows you as well as you know yourself."
"But I would see if they'd decided to come... "
I had an answer for that, too. "Unless they didn't want to get their hands dirty." This completely fit in with my theory. They'd sent someone we didn't know, someone who owed them a favor of some kind. Someone who'd long ago received an undeserved pardon, perhaps.
Shockingly, Rosalie was on the same wavelength. "A favor," she injected. "Someone in the South... someone who already had trouble with the rules. Someone who should have been destroyed is offered a second chance – if they take care of this one small problem... That would explain the Volturi's sluggish response."
"Why?" Carlisle asked. "What have we done to bring this upon us?" "There is no reason for the Volturi..."
"I was there," I said quietly, consumed by guilt and fear. "I'm surprised it's come to this so soon, because the other thoughts were stronger. In Aro's head he saw me at his one side and Alice at his other. The present and the future, virtual omniscience. The power of the idea intoxicated him. I would have thought it would take him much longer to give up on that plan – he wanted it too much."
I paused for a fraction of a second. What was I saying? In theory, he might just achieve both. He would do what it took to gain what he wanted and feed his hunger for dominion. He'd have his minions kill off everyone else, and then enslave Alice and me.
"But there was also the thought of you, Carlisle, of our family, growing stronger and larger. The jealousy and the fear; you having... not more than he had, but still, things that the wanted. He tried not to think about it, but he couldn't hide it completely. The idea of rooting out the competition was there; besides their own, our is the largest coven they've ever found... "
Bella was staring at me, her terror at my words reflected in the feelings that Jasper was absorbing from her. I could smell her fear. I had never told her this, and I didn't much like telling her now, but I couldn't keep this from her any longer.
If my suspicion was correct, we were all in mortal danger. At least Demetri wouldn't be able to find Bella if I concealed her. Only if Aro came himself, would he know where I'd hidden her. And that was unlikely. The ancients almost never left Volterra.
Carlisle didn't believe me. "They're too committed to their mission. They would never break the rules themselves. It goes against everything they've worked for."
My voice was grim. "They'll clean up afterwards," I theorized. "A double betrayal. No harm done."
"What's with the guilt, Edward? Quit being so masochistic. There's nothing you need to feel guilty about. And I don't believe your little theory. It doesn't add up." Jasper wasn't buying my theory either. "No, Carlisle is right. The Volturi don't break rules. Besides, it's much too sloppy. This... person, this threat – they have no idea what they're doing. A first-timer, I'd swear to it. I cannot believe the Volturi are involved. But they will be."
I contemplated his words. He did know more about this than I, certainly. Perhaps I was overreacting, overthinking this. Either way, we were still in danger. We all stared at each other, immobilized by fear and stress.
Emmett's roar broke the silence. "Then let's go," he shouted. "What are we waiting for?"
"Shut up, you idiot. Is there a problem with your ears? God, I swear, you'll be the death of me one day." Rosalie's silent reaction was instantaneous.
Carlisle looked at me for a moment, his eyes conveying the pain I could read in his thoughts. Pain at the possibility of losing one of us. "Is there really no other option? What will we do? Will you stay and fight with us, Edward? You know how I abhor this violence, and I can understand if you'd want to take Bella and run, but we'll need you, and your gift, if it truly comes to a fight. Will you stay?"
Of course, I would stay. I would not abandon them. There were other way to keep Bella out of harm's way. I nodded once.
"We'll need you to teach us, Jasper," he said, his voice full of the anguish at having to do what we had to do. "How to destroy them."
"We're going to need help," Jasper said, his voice as cold as I suddenly felt. "Do you think Tanya's family would be willing... ? Another five mature vampires would make an enormous difference. And then Kate and Eleazar would be especially advantageous on our side. It would be almost easy, with their help."
I didn't quite agree with the easy part, though Kate's offensive gift, and Eleazar's instinct for any talent the newborns might have would be very helpful, indeed.
"We'll ask," Carlisle said, as Jasper whipped out his cell phone.
"We need to hurry," he urged. "There's not much time left until the Volturi will come."
Carlisle took the phone, and walked towards the window. Leaning one hand against the pane, he dialed Tanya's number.
I took Bella's hand, and gently pulled her over to the love-seat to sit her down. Her face was white, and she seemed in shock. I could read her fear in the sheen of perspiration, without needing confirmation from Jasper. Putting my arm around her as we sat, I stared at Carlisle and listened closely to the conversation through his mind.
Tanya picked up on the third ring. "Hello?"
"Tanya – it's Carlisle. I hope you are all doing well."
"Carlisle – it's good to hear from you. How are you and your family?"
"Fine for the moment. Listen, Tanya, have you been watching the news out of Seattle?"
"Yes, of course, but we haven't really been keeping tabs on it. Of course, it's much closer to where you are. What's going on?"
"Jasper has convinced us that someone is building an army of newborns right under our nose, Tanya. You know his history, certainly, and as much as it pains me, I have to agree with him. We've come to the conclusion that we need to get involved. Before the Volturi come here. We can't have them so close, not now, not with Bella still human. Edward theorizes that the Volturi might be involved already, but I'm not sure I believe that. Meanwhile, the situation in Seattle is too grave for us to handle on our own. We'll need help – we can't do this alone. Which is why I'm calling. Would you be willing to assist us?"
"Well, Carlisle – under any other circumstances we would be there by morning, but Irina is very angry with you all. You remember Laurent, don't you? He spend almost a year up here, and the two of them became very close. They weren't mated, but be that as it may, she holds you all responsible for his death. I'm afraid that she's not going to be in favor of helping you with your little problem. And that leaves us out, as well, as I'm sure you can understand. She's been very distraught these past few months, and it's been taking a toll on all of us."
Tanya's voice was harsher than I'd ever heard her speak to Carlisle. "Oh," he said sharply, "we didn't realize... Irina felt that way."
I groaned in frustration and closed my eyes in despair. "Damn it. Damn Laurent to the deepest pit of hell where he belongs."
"Laurent?" Bella whispered next to me, but I was still too focused on the phone conversation to explain the situation.
"Tanya, please – I beg you. We cannot do this on our own. Your family are our closest friends, you know that, nearly extended family. We've been through much together, Tanya. Would you doom any of us this way?"
There was a pause on the other end as Tanya quickly conferred with her family. She'd muffled the phone somehow, and Carlisle was unable to hear her.
"Well, perhaps there is another option. Irina might be inclined to forgive you – under a certain condition."
"Condition?" Carlisle repeated. "What could she want?" "What condition, Tanya?"
"She wants revenge, as you can imagine. The wolves' lives for our assistance."
"Tanya, please, you can't be serious. The wolves saved Bella's life. How can you ask me to agree to this?"
"Ah yes – Bella. The human Edward's in love with. That doesn't matter to Irina. Her condition stands."
I was appalled. They were truly abandoning us. I hadn't expected that, not after our long history together. But I also had a fairly good idea why Tanya herself was unwilling to help. The last time I'd seen her, when I had fled to Denali after meeting Bella for the first time, nearly overcome by the call of her blood, Tanya had misunderstood my reason for being there. She'd thought I'd come for her, and my second rejection had apparently hurt her feelings more deeply than I'd realized.
"But Tanya – they are mated. You know what that means, don't you?"
"Then he should have turned her long ago, Carlisle. Either way, it doesn't matter. Irina wants the wolves in exchange for our help."
"There's no question of that," Carlisle said sharply. "We have a truce. They haven't broken it, and neither will we. I'm sorry to hear that...."
"So am I, Carlisle. I hope you understand that I cannot go against my sister's wishes. I have to think of my own family first."
"Of course. Well just have to do our best alone." He snapped the phone shut, and looked unseeingly out into the misty forests. "Heaven help us."
"Edward? What's going on? Are they not going to help? I only caught Carlisle's side." Esme was worriedly looking at Carlisle.
"What's the problem?" Emmett asked me quietly, staring at Carlisle's pensive stance for a moment, before looking at me.
"Irina was more involved with our friend Laurent than we knew," I answered him sarcastically. "She's holding a grudge against the wolves for destroying him to save Bella. She wants..." I paused, looking down at her, while the pain of the memory nearly took my breath away. I hadn't been here to keep her safe. Again, this was my fault. The guilt was intense. If I'd never left her, this wouldn't be happening.
"Edward, why are you feeling guilty? What is up with you?" Jasper looked at me quizzically.
"Go on," Bella said uneasily, apparently having misunderstood the reason for my hesitation.
My eyes tightened as I forced the words out, knowing it would upset her greatly. "She wants revenge. To take down the pack. They would trade their help for our permission."
"No!" Bella nearly shouted, as expected.
"Don't worry," I assured her quickly. "Carlisle would never agree to it." I hesitated, and exhaled in a rush. Then I laid my heart bare to let her see my raw pain at the memory of her close encounter. "Nor would I. Laurent had it coming," I couldn't suppress a growl and ended up snarling the rest of my words, "and I still owe the wolves for that."
"This isn't good," Jasper said anxiously. "It's too even a fight. We'd have the upper hand in skill, but not in numbers. We'd win, but at what price?" His eyes darted to Alice and back to me, as he thought of losing Alice. His own pain was intensified by our own. Rosalie curled herself deeper into Emmett's arms.
We all looked at each other. We could see the truth in Jasper's words. There'd be a price to pay if we went it alone. And one by one – we all accepted that.
Bella breathing was shallow and fast as the fear increased her already rapid heartbeat. Her gaze flickered across our faces, back and forth, as she began to hyperventilate. I wrapped her in my arms and pulled her onto my lap. Esme was quietly sobbing. Carlisle walked over to the couch and put his hands on her shoulders. Alice melted into Jasper who wrapped her into his arms.
Bella burst into tears, hot, salty, streaming down her cheeks. Her head turned into my shoulder and I felt the wetness seep into my shirt. "Shh, Bella, shh, it's all right, it's okay. We're fine, love, we're fine. Shh, my love, it's okay," I quietly chanted in her ear.
"Take her upstairs to your room, Son" Carlisle suggested. "Do your best to calm her down. We need to plan, need to call others. She's heard enough."
My thoughts exactly. I got up and carried Bella to my room. Carefully, I laid us both down on the bed and pulled her against me.
"Edward," she cried, "oh, Edward. What are we going to do?" Her hand gripped my shirt and she crushed herself closer to me.
"It will be okay, Bella, we will find a way. We are strong. Don't worry, please don't worry."
"How can I not?" she sobbed.
"Bella," I said, desperate to stop the flow of tears. "Bella, sweetheart, I promise you – it will be all right. There are others we can call, others who will help. Please don't worry."
We lay quietly for a while until the sobs faded and her breathing returned to normal. She lifted her face to mine, then and, bringing one hand to her cheek, I gently brushed her tears away with my fingertips. I kissed her forehead.
It wasn't enough for her. With a deep breath, she twisted in my arm and before I had a chance to stop her, she crushed her lips against mine. I could feel the desperation of her kiss, and I had no choice but to return it. Her lips opened and her warm, sweet breath blew her unique scent into my face. Her small, hot hand began to roam over my chest.
Pure desire instantly washed over me, and suddenly my hands were moving, too. The kiss deepened, until she broke away gasping for air. Her head fell back, exposing her throat. Even then, I did not stop – I simply moved my lips down to her jawline, the translucent skin on her neck, against the pulsing artery on the side. I deeply inhaled her scent again. Fire erupted in my throat, but it was so easy to ignore. I gently ran my hands up and down her back, debating whether I should dare to put my hand against her bare skin.
Bella put her hands on my face and returned her lips to mine. Her tongue brushed against my mouth, and suddenly, I felt her teeth on my lower lip. She bit down gently, and then sucked my lip between hers. The sensation of being enveloped in the warmth of her lips was simply shocking. It sent a flash of electricity throughout my body, and instantly put me on the brink. Bella quietly moaned. That did it.
My low growl of pleasure came out of nowhere. My manhood hardened without my permission, twitching against my groin. I was so shocked by her boldness, I forgot to think for a split second, before I broke off the kiss.
In one swift motion, with just enough brainpower to avoid hurling her across the room, I rolled off the bed and landed on the floor, gasping.
Holy hell! Where had that come from?
The monster in my head yelled. "Get back there, you idiot. What are you doing? She wants it – give it to her."
I sat up, trying to get my erection under control, and stared at her in furious disbelief. Was she insane?
Bella crawled over to the side of the bed and looked down at me. "I'm sorry," she said breathlessly. "I didn't mean to do that."
If I had been human, my face would have been bright red. In my embarrassment, my voice was angrier than I meant it to be. "What the hell was that, Bella?"
She blushed deeply, but didn't answer.
I was abashed at having cursed at her. "I'm sorry, Bella... "
"What do you have to be sorry for?"
"I didn't mean to swear at you. That was very impolite"
"No big deal," she simply replied and shrugged. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Of course."
"Did you just growl?"
Oh, damn, she'd heard it. I mustered all the dignity I could find inside me, with my throbbing member pulsing in my lap, and threw her a withering glare. She seemed entirely unimpressed. Damn.
"I suppose I did," I admitted sheepishly.
She smiled. "Really?"
Had she liked that? Interesting. I filed that information away for future use. Then I shook my head at myself. Under the current circumstances, this entire discussion was not a good idea.
I took a deep breath, and with flying hands, so she wouldn't see, rearranged the front of my pants. "You surprised me. That's not a smart move, you know, surprising me. If I'm not in control of myself, I could hurt you. You know that."
"I know," she replied, and the sadness in her voice nearly broke my frozen heart. "Edward, I am sorry, really."
"Shh," I whispered gently. "It's all right. Just don't do it again." I climbed back onto the bed, and she snuggled herself against me. I wrapped her in my arms.
I sighed. What was I going to do? Not only was I warring with my own desires, now I had hers to worry about, too?
Bella's stomach rumbled. I checked the clock and realized it was lunch time. "Are you hungry?" I asked her.
"A little," she replied. "But I don't want to go downstairs yet."
"Would you like me to get you something?"
"That would be nice. What do you have, you think?"
"I have no idea," I admitted. "Can I not persuade you to come to the kitchen with me? If you like, we can bring your tray back here."
"Okay. Uh – I need a quick human minute." She blushed again, and raised herself to a sitting position.
I watched the lovely heat fill her face, wondering why she was blushing. "All right, I'll wait."
"No, that's okay. Go ahead... I'll meet you in the kitchen."
"As you wish." I leaned up to kiss her forehead. "Don't make me wait too long, my love."
She smiled and walked over to the bathroom. I left the room, wondering why she'd sent me away. And then I heard it. Oh. I was truly an idiot.
I rushed down the stairs into the living room. "Esme," I said, "Bella is a little hungry. Is there something we can make for her?"
Esme got up and followed me to the kitchen. "There's some fresh apples and bananas I got just yesterday, and if she'd like, I can make her a sandwich. And soda is in the refrigerator."
"I can do that," I told her with a smile.
She hugged me quickly. "Edward, I'm so worried. What will we do?"
"It'll be okay. Perhaps Jasper will be able to contact Peter and Charlotte," I tried to assure her. "By the way, Bella has to study for finals this afternoon, so I am going to take her home after lunch. Can you watch over her? I would like to discuss our strategy with Jasper and Carlisle. It'll be only for a little while."
Esme nodded. "Yes, of course, dear."
I heard Bella's footfalls on the stairs. Esme smiled. "I'm so glad you found her, Edward."
So was I. There weren't words to express how happy Bella made me.
I returned Esme's smile, before she walked out of the kitchen.
Bella appeared around the corner. "Hi," she said, and wrapped her arms around my waist. I kissed her hair.
"Okay," I said. "What would you like to eat? Esme bought fruit, or I can make you a sandwich, or perhaps you'd like both?"
"What kind of sandwich?"
"That is a very good question. Unfortunately, I don't have an answer. Ham and Cheese, perhaps? Or Peanut Butter and Jelly? What tickles your fancy?"
She giggled. "Let's see what's in the fridge. Can you get me a plate, please?"
I searched the cupboards until I found the plates. "Here you are," I handed one to her. Bella had already pulled the bread, and prepackaged ham from the refrigerator. There was also a tub of butter.
I opened the silverware drawer. "Knife?" I said, holding one out to her.
"Yes, thank you." I watched her while she spread the butter on the bread, then covered each slice with a slice of ham. She put the two slices together and cut down the middle.
Interesting. I filed the information away. I'd be able to make one just like that for her next time.
"There's fruit, too. An apple, perhaps, or a banana?" I asked her.
"I think I'll have a banana. And something to drink – a soda." I pulled a Sprite can from the refrigerator, and removed one of the bananas from the bunch. My hands were full, so I put the soda can and the banana on the counter. I hadn't found a tray yet. "Esme, do we have a tray of some kind?"
"There's one in the cabinet next to the stove." I pulled the door open. Ah – there was one. I put it on the counter, and placed Bella's plate on top. Then I added the soda and the banana. All done.
Napkin. "Esme, where are the napkins?"
"Pantry, top shelf."
I dashed into the pantry, and pulled a napkin from the stack, placing it next to the plate. "Ready?" I asked Bella.
"Looks good," she grinned. I carried the tray upstairs, walking after her, trying my damnedest not to look at her derriere which was seductively swaying from side to side in front of my face. I was glad when we reached the top of the stairs.
I put the tray on the low coffee table in my room, and Bella folded herself on the floor in front of it. She crossed her legs and reached for the sandwich. I opened the soda for her. "Thanks," she said.
I felt rather daring, so I scooted up behind her, stretching my legs on either side of her. She leaned back against me. "This is different," she commented. I just smiled, and loosely wrapped my arms around her waist. She finished her sandwich in that position, occasionally drinking from the soda can.
With one hand, ever so gently, I moved her long, silky hair to the side and nuzzled on her neck. She smelled so good, so wonderful. The fire in my throat was smoldering. Bella picked up the banana, and peeled it. I watched it move to her mouth. My juvenile fantasies took off, and my pants became uncomfortably tight.
Time to move. "Uh, I'll be right back," I said. "Just dashing downstairs for a moment." If she wondered at my urgency, or had noticed the bulge pressing into her lower back, she didn't let on.
"Okay," she said. I nearly fled the room. "Breathe," I told myself. "Get a grip, Edward." I waited a few minutes, willing this latest erection to disappear, until I heard her put the banana peel onto the tray. I knew then it was safe to go back into my room. Would this never end? I consoled myself that at least I seemed under better control.
"Hi," I said. "All done? Would you like anything else?"
"No, thank you. This was enough." It didn't seem like much to me, and I worried that she wasn't eating enough. I told myself that she'd be having dinner with Charlie later.
"All right, then. I think I should take you home now. You still have to study for finals. Esme will be in the woods watching out for you."
"You're not staying?"
"No, but I'll be back before your dinner." She didn't ask me what I was going to do, and I was glad for that. "Ready?"
"Okay." She looked a little sad.
She got up and I pulled her into my arms. "I know," I said, "I don't like being away from you, either."
Bella sighed. "It's okay. I know you have a lot to talk about with your family."
I should have realized she'd know why I wasn't staying. She was much too perceptive sometimes.
"Let's get you home," I said, and led her down the stairs. Bella waved a quick goodbye to my family. I opened the car door for her and made sure she was buckled in.
"I'll be there soon, Edward," Esme thought. I heard her get up to change in her room.
The drive to Bella's house was quiet. She leaned her head against my shoulder, and closed her eyes, but didn't say anything.
I walked her to the door, and handed her the backpack. I could already hear Esme in the woods behind the house. "I'll be back soon, my love," I said.
"Hurry back," she whispered and turned her face up to me. I kissed her gently for just a moment.
"I love you, my Bella."
"Me, too," she sighed before she turned and walked inside. I hated leaving her, but there was much to discuss at my house. We needed to lay out our strategy, plan for training and see if Jasper would be able to contact Peter and Charlotte.
I jogged back to the car, and with a last look at her house, drove off.