Guess What

Disclaimer: Still don't own.

AN: Thanks for the love. This is much longer than the last.

Chapter 11: Guess What

The room was silent for a moment as the group tried to digest the sight before them. Dawn was the first to act. She ran out onto the steps and started to pull Spike to his feet. Jon jumped in and pulled Spike's arm over his shoulder to drag him inside, but there was some kind of force keeping them from entering. Everyone was puzzled until Dawn started babbling.

"I'm sorry, I forgot. You haven't been here before. Spike come inside." The force disappeared, but she kept talking. "What happened? Who did this? Did you get in a fight with Angel again? I know you guys haven't been getting along since that thing with Buffy when you showed up at our house. Does Vi know where you are? I know about that too. What is it with you? Are you collecting your own little powerpuff girls or something? First Buffy, then that one girl Melissa, and now Vi. That is so wrong. Not as wrong as your original idea for a trifecta, but still gross.

As she spoke she was hustling Spike, and by extension Jon, through the house and down the stairs into the basement with the rest following behind. She never noticed that she dropped her pregnancy test in the kitchen, or that Cassie picked it up.

In the basement she moved Spike to the bed in the bedroom and ran to the closet. She muttered a few words at the wall in the back and then, when nothing happened, she yelled "Damn, it" in frustration and ran back up the stairs. She returned a moment later with a sheet of paper containing a list of actions followed by a phrase in another language. She looked at her list and said a different phrase and then a split second later, where there had just been wall, there was a metal door in front of her. She opened the door to what appeared to be a refrigerator and tossed a bag of blood at Robyn.

"Microwave, turntable on, 2½ minutes. Put it in the big black mug that nobody uses and add marshmallows. Oh and sprinkle it with cocoa powder."

Dawn sat on the bed and opened her mouth to continue her babble from earlier but Spike put a hand over her mouth to quiet her.

"Niblet, please don't. Besides, from the look on their faces," he gestured to the gob smacked looks on Jon, Jonas and Cassie's faces, "you need to do a bit of explainin' to your bloke and the kiddies."

Dawn looked at him and he shrugged. "You smell like him."He then turned to Jenny, who was sitting on his other side looking worried, and patted her cheek. "No worries pet. No harm done. Well, some, but that stupid bint will get hers."

Jenny smiled weakly and gave Spike a hug and Robyn was racing through the door and handed Spike the mug she was carrying. "Cheers Little Red." Spike smiled and started downing the warm blood. "Almost as good as when you make it Niblet."

"You're a vampire."Everyone turned and stared at Jon, who looked unnerved by their regard.

"Will 'I've seen some weird stuff' be enough of an explanation?"

Five people shook their heads and Spike snorted. "Not likely with this lot."

"Yeah, thought not. How bout we deal with your story first though. Seems odd you're visiting and all."

Spike smirked and nodded in agreement. "Kid has a point."

Dawn rolled her eyes and went to stand next to Jonas. "Ok, Spike. What the hell happened to you?"

"Well, bit, I was making my way from Cleveland to this place in Mexico where there have been some fairly strange deaths. Didn't use the TWERP thing cause it wasn't a big bad that I knew of, and I was solo cause Vi and the girls are dealing with a hellmouth thing at the moment. I wasn't able to help them cause it's a mostly outdoor daylight thing. Something about high noon on a hill or some such. Anyway, I was on the road and some bloody moron cuts me off and drives me off the road. I get pissed in a local demon bar waiting for the damage to be fixed and overhear some chat about a big bad recruiting for some attack on that mountain up there. I was tailing a couple of big puss covered wankers most of the way here. Was hopin they would lead me to some more information I could pass on to my Flower. So we get to just outside of town and they meet up with some ugly witch bitch who spots me and uses some kind of energy spell or something to kick my ass. Called home and got reamed for not callin for back up and then my girl told me bout this place and how to get here. Didn't mention it was you runnin the place though."

"You didn't tell Vi you were hurt either did you?"

"Mentioned a scuffle."

"Right. I'm calling Cleveland. Did they finish their apocalypse yet?"

"Yeah, but showdown yesterday. Heard it was a bit o' fun."

"Right. Be right back." She was almost out of the room when she noticed Cassie, standing with her back to the rest of the group looking at her intently, waving the pregnancy test discretely in front of her. "Um, Cassie, can you come up with me for a sec?"

"Sure." Cassie said brightly and they hurried up the stairs. Up in the kitchen Cassie sat at the counter and waited quietly while Dawn made her call.

"Hey Vi, we have a problem here."

/Yeah, Spike said there was a thing./

"Yup. How many people can you have ready to move in 2 hours?"

/How much room you got?/

"14 empty rooms, a guest room in the house, and you can share with Spike in the basement."

/Ok, I'll have 12 minis, 4 watchers, 2 witches and me ready to go./

"That doesn't add up you know."

/Yeah, but there are some couples and a couple of girls who don't mind doubling up on the list./

"Ok, see you then."

She hung up and turned to Cassie. "In a short time you guys are going to know way more about me and my family than any of you ever wanted to know. That, " she pointed to the stick on the counter, "is a really big deal to me. Now is just not the time to talk about it. Can you please keep it to yourself until I'm ready?"

Cassie smiled and walked over to give Dawn a comforting hug. "Of course. Just wanted to be all best friendy and let you know I'm here for you. You are my closest girl friend, and I think that whole exchange of information thing is going to put me pretty out there too. No worries."

Dawn smiled and hugged her back and they went back downstairs. When they pushed their way back in Dawn looked at the group crowded in there and noticed Jenny getting anxious with all that was going on. She smiled at her and announced that they were all going back to the house to talk more comfortably.

"Jenny, go grab Spike's stuff from his car and put it in the guest room."

Cassie raised an eyebrow. "Didn't you tell Vi that they were staying in the basement?"

"Not really enough room down here for both of them to be comfortable for more than one night, and I think this might take a while. Besides, Spike needs to get to know his new niece better."

"They let you keep her then?" Spike asked as he slowly made his way to the stairs with Jon still helping him move, if just a bit less than before.

"Yep, adoption went through last week."

"No party? Thought scoobies had a party for everything."

"Well, a party would have been nice, but I'm kinda keeping my distance right now. We went to O'Malley's though, great steak."

By the time the main group got to the family room Jenny was waiting for them with some snacks and drinks.

"I figured we might as well get cozy, this is gonna take a while." She said with a grin.

Dawn was the one to do the slayer speech, the same one she had given to Robyn and her family. After she finished the general information she got to the specifics.

"My older sister was called at 15. She's the one who died and came back, creating the double slayers. A couple of years later there was a military group who thought it would be cool to use vampires and demons as lab rats. Spike was taken and implanted with a microchip that caused him extreme pain every time he tried to hurt a human. He couldn't eat, and was unable to care for himself. He started selling information to us on demons and other vampires for blood. They even kept him tied up in the bathtub for a while because Buffy thought he was to pathetic to kill. He couldn't fight back. After a while he earned an amount of trust and began helping with the slaying since he could hurt demons. Other stuff happened and he ended up spending a lot of time babysitting me and we got close. Buffy died for real when I was barely 14. I ended up living with her friends for a while, until they brought her back for the dead with a spell. That was really traumatic for her and she was screwed up for a while. Spike had been in love with her for a while and they connected for a time. She broke it off, he freaked, they fought and he left. He came back months later with a soul, but the guilt of who he had been and the big bad, the First I explained before, drove him nuts. Stuff happened with chains and singing and his chip having to be removed due to malfunctions and he got better. He went up in ashes to save the world and then got trapped in an amulet that caused him to be ghosty for a while until he came back all the way. For whatever reason he and Buffy's other ex Angel, also a vampire with a soul, but really different circumstances that don't matter right now, kept it a secret for a year. Buffy got pissed when she found out and hasn't spoken to him since. He's been in Cleveland helping the slayers there and completing his trifecta of slayers nailed. Did I miss anything?"

"Hey, I resent that. Not my fault slayers find me irresistible. Melissa was a one night drunken thing anyway. And I've been with Vi for 3 years. Not like I've got a harem up there."

"Anyway, the only other thing is me." And she told them about the key.

After a few minutes Jonas hugged her close and said, "I love you. I don't care how you got here." And she smiled happily.

"So, Jenny and Robyn are both slayers and I'm their watcher. Robyn's family knows what and where she is. She's not abandoned or anything, it's just a cover story for why she doesn't live at home anymore. Jenny was in a group home in Canada and we took her in. That part is all true. There is this whole thing with me opening magical portals that you are going to see in about an hour, but that's about it."

Dawn took a cleansing breath and turned her attention to Jon. "Now it's your turn."

Jon sighed. "I don't know what to say exactly. Most of it is covered by a non disclosure agreement I signed and it involves Jonas and Cassie too. I don't want to tell things they don't want told."

Jonas shrugged. "It's no weirder than what they just told us, so I don't mind"

Cassie nodded. "Yeah, and if it makes you feel better, I'll tell it. As Jonas reminded me when I first moved to the inn, I never actually signed anything. Frankly, I think that the big wigs in charge forgot I existed after mom died." Jon gestured for her to continue and she told the story of Stargate Command and the people who worked there.

"Wow." Dawn said. "Not what I was expecting at all. And that still doesn't explain how you know about vampires."

Jon smiled. "Well no, but I figured me saying that I ran into a nest of vampires on a black ops mission in the early 80's wouldn't make a whole hell of a lot of sense without the background information."

Robyn laughed. "Good point. You really are WAY too old for me."

"Yep."

They all laughed and the tension was broken.

For the next 15 minutes they asked Spike questions about his attacker and the plans of the demons he was following. The more detail about the 'ugly witch bitch' they got the more it sounded like a goa'ould. The golden glowing eyes and oddly timbered voice could have been something else, but the idea to raid Cheyenne Mountain and Spike's description of what sounded like a modified hand device, made them pretty sure.

"Why would a snake use demons to attack the SGC?" Cassie asked.

"Well, we certainly wouldn't see it coming." Jon replied.

"Well, now that we know about it we need to stop them before they get that far." Dawn added decisively. "No offense Jon, but the military and the demon world do not need to be tangled up together ever again. We stop the attack and take out the snakey bitch before they even get close and the Air Force never has to know how close they got to getting their asses handed to them." Everyone nodded.

Dawn looked at her watch. "Time to pick up the troops. You guys wanna see?"

On the way to the parlor of the mansion Dawn burst into hysterics. "My best friend and my boyfriend are aliens."

Jonas started to chuckle. "My girlfriend's big brother figure is a vampire, her sister is a demon hunter and she can come back from the dead to kick my ass"

The whole group burst into laughter. Dawn couldn't even stop to do her spell. It took 3 tries before she could get the words out properly. When the slayer group arrived they found 7 people sprawled on the couches laughing their asses off at the strange way their lives were going.