E: You have a LoTR extended edition. Why am I not surprised...at all?
F: Bluray, bitch. It's beautiful. 12 hours of awesomeness.
E: *cough* nerd *cough*
F: *cough* masterpiece *cough*
Tell me you don't like lord of the rings. Tell me so I can slap you.
E: I don't not like lord of the rings.
F: Liar.
E: I may or may not be...
F: You like it.
E: Okay, I have Two Towers on DVD. Gosh.
F: Because it's awesome!
E: Heh.
F: You know it's true. You're a pretty big nerd as well. Don't even try and pretend you're not
E: Not listening. Lalalalalala.
F: Lol. Did you ever watch sailor moon?
E: Yes...I think I still remember the theme song. Actually, I memorized the lyrics.
F: Haha, so have I. Not by any deep wish to, but it just sorta happened.
E: Omg does that solidify me as a nerd like you now?
F: Lol, you were solidified before. No worries.
(…)
E: Did anyone have pink hair? I forgot.
F: Um. None of the main characters/good guys. It was Sailor Moon:blonde, Mercury: Blue, Venus: like gingerish/blonde, Jupiter: Green/Black, then there were the extra scouts and stuff, um... saturn: black, pluto: like a greenish black, and Neptune: blonde short hair. Yes I remember these things.
E: I totally had a crush on Jupiter/Venus? I don't remember. I liked her boots.
F: You were so gay.
E: Tuxedo Mask. Heh.
F: Was that an "I liked you" or "he's laughable" heh?
E: Oh, I liked him.
F: Lol. Okay, you were so bi. I loved him. Granted I was really young, but I loved him and Venus was my favourite.
Oh, more thunder! The really big "king kong's on percussion" kind. Wooh! Pretty sure I felt that one.
E: Yes, wooh...
"There's a goddamn time limit on everything, isn't there?" Bo asked angrily, handing the paper back to her grandfather.
"Well, nothing can last forever, Bo."
"Yeah, I'm getting that." She glanced over at the valkyrie who seemed to be nervously staring up at the ceiling. ? "Keep her safe, will you?"
"I won't take my eyes off of her...cuz she be fiiiine.
LOL
E: Yeah that was awkward.
F: Writing that? lol.
E: Imagine Trick saying that.
F: I will not. My mind might implode.
E: IMAGINE IT. His face in your brain. His mouth saying those words.
F: Stop trying to kill me and write.
Unconvinced, Tamsin slowly sat up, snatching the cup from the elder fae's outstretched hand , gazing at the liquid before she brought it to her lips. It was a peculiar taste, light and minty, as it flowed down her throat, but it was the aftertaste that caught her. Tamsin licked her lips as the flavor settled into her taste buds, the powerful taste suddenly becoming a surge that made her eyes widen. "Dude, what's in this?"
"A couple of homegrown herbs. Nothing special."
"Nothing special my ass. Don't bullshit me, old man."
"BLOOD OF MY ENEMIES."
"Say what?"
"I put in some blood of my enemies."
"That's some dark shit."
F: Lol.
E: Haha.
F: Awesome Tamsin is awesome.
F: You gonna continue?
E: Q_Q. Dying.
F: ?
E: I can't write anymore. UGH.
F: Snap out of it, Dammit. I bewiebe in yew.
E: That looks like bewbies.
F: …
E: Okay, that's it. I'm taking a break.
F: No, dammit. We were making very slow progress.
E: Turtles crawl faster than the progress we've made today.
F: We wrote like a couple hundred words.
E: Very excruciatingly.
F: Ugh. Don't be a baby.
E: We can finish it off tomorrow.
F: Fine, fine. And now I have a headache. I blame you.
E: I'm also the one who ate all your food.
F: Yes. Yes you are.
E: And I just kicked your dog too.
F: No. No you didn't.
E: Well, she's gonna fall over any minute now.
F: She's lying firmly on her fat stomach. Good luck with that.
E: She'll fall over tomorrow.
F: Delayed kick response.
E: Very delayed. Time difference, dude. Yea.
F: …your logic is flawed.
E: It's Lauren-bot logic. Shove it.
F: Will not do.
E: K. Adios. :P
F: Ugh. Fine. Bai.
E: Baii.
F: Loser.
E: Bitch.
F: Whore.
E: Asshole.
F: Slut.
E: Douche.
F: ...boob.
E: Puppy.
F: Kitten.
E: Chick.
F: Pussy.
E: Um..no.
F: :P
E: Ugh. Baii already.
F: Bai.
"It can depend on your willpower-what kind of fae you are," Trick stated, taking a seat at the blonde's side on the couch. "It probably won't be very comfortable."
"Like I'm so very comfortable now..." Tamsin coughed, handing the cup to Trick and pulling the blanket tighter around her frame.
"Well, prepare yourself for more...shit's gonna get worse homegirl.
"Ow!" Inari screamed, resisting the tug as Bo threw her body forward.
Trick stood from his spot beside the valkyrie, gesturing towards the desk in the corner of the room. "Dyson, grab a chair and bind her arms and legs.
Bo ran over to Tamsin and commenced with the cuddling. She snuggled underneath the blanket while Inari was screaming in the background.
"Hey, wanna make out to pass the time?" Tamsin asked.
"Okay!"
"Tamsin?" Bo crossed the small room, taking a seat on the couch as she placed a gentle hand on the blonde's shoulder. With her palms resting atop the thick blanket, she could practically feel the heat radiating from the valkyrie's body, the intensity of it making her so damn horny.
lol
:)
Trick and his dirty little secrets.
E: How does Trick know all of this shit and doesn't say it at the start? Lol, fucking troll.
F: I imagine he's like taking what he read and applying it to the situation. "Oh, she looks super weak. This might just kill her if we don't keep it under wraps."
E: So basically ...near death, must stab self.
F: ...yep.
E: That's wonderful. We really love you, Tamsin.
F: Clearly. Because it ends with Valkubus.
E: Tam Tam gets all the shit lol. Okay so whatever. Yeah have Trick just casually mention it. "oh btw, she might die if those symptoms get worse." trollface.
F: "What the hell, Trick!? You couldn't tell us that like half a day ago?"
E: "I didn't read that far yet."
F: "..."
F: "What?"
F: "Fuck you."
E: I'd say something but it'd sound dirty because Trick's part of the conversation now. Meh.
E: I need to shower.
F: I'm going to bed in a few minutes. Chill.
E: Define 'a few minutes.'
F: Like 5?
E: Then we be done here.
F: 5. Minutes. Calm yo tits.
E: And we've wasted 2 of it already.
F: Shut your face and chill!
"From what I've gathered," Trick began, lifting the aged and battered piece of paper from before off of his desk as he spoke, "this transformation has her body in an unstable state. Every cell is mutating, and as they go through the process she's at a higher risk of succumbing to her symptoms. Not much unlike how an elderly human can more easily be killed by common colds and flus."
"Did he just fucking call me old?"
"Don't worry about it, babe. I'd still bang you."
"Good to know."
E: The important thing is what they're gonna do to her character. Oh gawd.
F: If they try and kill her, the fandom will blow up and then they'll have to fix it. No worries. We have them by the balls.
E: Or make her related to Bo.
F: By the balls.
E: I'm not sure if I want us to be as crazy doccubus, but if it gets the point across...
F: The balls.
E: Lol, heard you the first time.
F: :) Let's write, bitch.
E: Fine. Fine.
E: FUCK THERE'S A SPIDER ON MY DESK. It was crawling on my arm. Jesus.
F: Haha. That's hilarious. Did you kill it?
E: It was fucking huge! I kinda ran away.
F: Lol. You ran away then you came back?
E: I don't know where it went now. I'm scared.
F: Well, I'm genuinely sorry for your predicament.
E: No, you're not. You're laughing at my misery.
F: ...You don't know that.
E: And I'm gonna sit here in fear for the rest of the day not knowing when that spider is coming back. Goddammit.
(...)
F: Lol. It's probably just staring at you. Plotting your death.
E: Hush! It looked like a daddy long legs.
F: Ewwwww.
How we start new documents.
E: First.
F: DAMMIT.
E: HAHA.
F: Bitch.
E: :P
F: Weh.
And again.
F: First.
E: Hooray for you.
F: Yes. Hooray for me.
The title of our chapter 7 outline
E: CHAPTER 7: KEEP THIS SHIT RANDOM-FREE
F: NEVER
This, bitch. -F
E: Great. Now I'm just reading old fanfics because there's nothing new.
F: I'm so very sorry.
E: *narrows eyes*
F: *Smiles sweetly*
E: *crosses arms and taps foot*
F: *Laughs nervously*
E: *scowls*
F: *Backs away slowly*
E: *pushes towards you. hands dropping, reaching for pockets*
F: "Watcha got in your pockets?"
E: *grins silently and pulls out gun*
F: "Fuck, you're so aggressive." *Looks around for weapon*
E: *presses trigger. water squirts out at you* "Ha! Your face."
F: *Charges you. Tackles you to the ground.*
E: *throws you off. squirts more water in your face*
F: *Furiously wipes water away. Grabs gun, tosses it aside.*
E: *points and laughs*
F: *punches you in the face*
E: *sidesteps and jabs you across the jaw*
F: *ducks, uppercuts you in the chin*
E: ow *ducks down, sweeps at your legs and topples you to the ground*
F: *rolls away from you. Stands up. Glares.*
E: *glares back and kicks you in the knees*
F: *falls into wall behind self. Pushes off, knees you in stomach.*
E: *catches your knee and twists it to the side, making you lose your balance*
F: *Grabs hold of wall to regain balance. Finds pot. Swings it at you. Hits the side of your flabby face.*
E: *finds pan and swings it at your saggy neck*
F: *Ducks. Swipes at your ankles. You fall.*
E: *pushes off the ground and kicks you in your flabby gut. You fall backwards, hitting your head on a coffee table and then black out*
F: Gee. Thanks. Just knock me out, why don't you?
E: :)
F: Bitch.
E: You love it.
F: Being virtually knocked out?
E: Yes, your flab was beginning to wind you out.
F: No. Your flab was beginning to wind you. Which is why you wanted to end it.
E: No. I was saving you the trouble.
F: Lies. Next time I'm cuffing you to the radiator.
E: Good luck with that.
F: You'll see.
E: Psh. Now you're just scared I might knock you out again.
F: You do it every single time.
E: Lol. Cuz I'm boss.
F: No, cuz you're a jerk.
E: Lol. If you say so. We should make a twitter now and be more threatening.
F: We should. Go forth and make one before you head home.
E: And since you're at home, why don't you make one?
F: Because you're not doing anything significant.
E: And you are?
F: Maybe.
E: Like what?
F: Like being awesome.
E: That doesn't count. Get out.
F: Lol. Fine, fine. I'll make it. Bitch.
E: :) Be a dear and fetch me a soda too.
F: Be a dear and fetch your own damn soda.
A/N: The highlight of our friday. -F
E: Ugh. I got a paper cut.
F: Did you burst into tears?
E: Yes. I fell into a puddle on the floor.
F: Wooh!
E: I put hand sanitizer on it lol.
F: Why would you do that?
E: To disinfect it. Germaphobe.
F: Right. Freak. Masochist.
E: Yup.
F: What if you ever get like shanked? Will you just dump hand sanitizer on it?
E: I'll rub vodka on it.
A/N: That's so Tamsin of her. -F
F: Lol. That sounds pleasant.
E: Get my wound drunk.
F: Get your body pissed at you.
E: Not like it isn't already.
F: Lol. Alrighty then.
(some time later)
E: Ugh my papercut is bleeding again.
F: That's what you get for putting alcohol on it.
E: It stung so good.
F: No, it just stung. It stung like a bitch.
E: :P
F: Freaking masochist.
E: Lol.
F: Ugh. Sleep. I need. Go away. Shoo.
E: Okay.
F: Shank me goodnight? :P
E: *shanks you*
F: Why shankyou. Ha.
E: Don't mention it. Now get your ass to bed.
F: I'm in bed. Now bai.
E: Lol. Bai.
F: :p *Shank*
E: *Shanks back three times*
F: Ouch. Bitch.
E: You asked for it.
F: Lol. True. I did.
E: Shank dreams.
F: Shank nightmares.
E: Shank bye.
F: Shank baiiiii.
E: Leave already.
F: No. Alright. Okay. Bai.
E: Lol. Baii.
A/N: On Rachel's aweshum facial expressions. -E
F: :) She's so skilled at eye rolling.
E: Anyone who can perfect the eye rolling is my favorite person. She wins.
F: lol. Some people look like they're about to have a seizure when they do it.
E: Lol, like "what the hell is up with yo eyes?"
F: "I was rolling them."
"No, I think you were temporarily invaded by the devil. BE CLEANSED EVIL SPIRIT!"
E: *sprays holy water*
F: "Why are you carrying holy water around?"
E: "To cleanse the stupid and the UGLEEE."
F: "I thought you weren't religious."
E: "I'm not. And this isn't really holy water."
E: "My face! It burns!"
F: "It's acid. E: Well that's one down. 5.99 billion more to go."
F: Aren't there like 8 billion of us now? Likely to be 10 at the end of the next decade. Or 9.
E: Jesus. I lost count.
(Some time later)
F: We. Need. More. Gays.
E: Go make some.
F: Go make more gays? As in give birth to children and make them gay or convert people?
E: Whichever is easiest.
F: Says the person that HAS to take a shower every single night before bed. Not in the morning. At night. Every night.
Apparently you're not the person to go to for a one night stand.
E: How exactly does that prohibit a one night stand?
F: Well, generally they happen kinda late. And if you have to get up in the middle of the actual stand to go shower...
E: Generally, if it's a one night stand, you'd be gone after said action and then go home to do the showering.
F: But then it'd technically be morning, or else the stand wasn't worth it.
E: Well, if it was worth it, then I wouldn't shower. How's that?
F: lol. Really?
E: Lol. Maybe.
F: That's a no.
E: It could be a yes.
F: It could also be a no.