Disclaimer: I own… (Lightning strike the ground)…Ok! Allright! I'll never lie! *grumble-I don't own GS/D-grumble* (thunder)…Hey! I didn't lie! (Continues to grumble)…
Athrun's Fall
Chapter Ten
OOOOoo
"You didn't know?" Meer affectionately ran her fingers through Athrun's hair. "Athrun didn't actually propose to me until yesterday, though he was close to it the last time we were together, which was only days before his accident."
Cagalli looked down at him with stark heartache and incredulity. "You asked her to marry you?"
"We're seriously talking about it."
"You actually want to marry her? Why?"
"I beg your pardon," Meer said with affront. "Athrun—"
"Be quite, Meer," he interrupted sharply. "I want to hear what Cagalli has to say." He hadn't taken his eyes off her. They gazed up to her steadily from beneath his brows, but his expression wasn't malevolent. If anything, he seemed amused. At the very least, curious. "Why don't you think I should marry Meer? We've been close acquaintances for several year."
"A bit more than that, darling," Meer interjected. Athrun shot her a warning glance to keep silence.
He turned back to Cagalli. "Meer is sympathetic to my present condition. However it turns out, she's reconciled to living with me."
"What do you mean by 'however it turns out'?"
"My being sexually dysfunctional."
"Is it really necessary to discuss something so personal with the hired help?" Meer asked with irritation.
Athrun quelled her with another hard look. "I'll deal with this my own way, Meer. If you can't keep quiet, leave the room." She chose to stay, but her red lips drew up into a disapproving pout.
"Meer is willing to marry me in spite of my inability to sire children," he calmly told Cagalli. "She's kind. A cultured, congenial woman. Why wouldn't any man but especially one in my situation, be overjoyed that she consented to marry me?"
Cagalli hiked her chin up a notch and flung her hair back defiantly. "If you want to make the biggest mistake of your life, it's no skin off my nose."
Again Meer opened her mouth to protest, but Athrun shot her a look of such dire threat that her perfect white teeth clicked shut.
"Why do you think that marriage to Meer would be a big mistake?"
"Remember, you asked for this," Cagalli cautioned him.
"I'll remember."
"Okay," Cagalli said, taking a deep breath. "She's not acting in your best interest. She's babying you, mollycoddling you, pampering and petting you."
"What's wrong with that?"
"Everything."
"You don't think husbands should be pampered?"
"Not husbands in your condition and certainly not at this stage in your treatment. Once you're back to normal, you can be waited on hand and foot, and I'll give a green light to any woman dumb enough to do that for a man. But right now, you should be driven and bullied and prodded—"
"In other words, she should treat me the same way you do."
"Exactly! What she's doing is fine if you're content to lie around and sip the martinis she brings you and eat your meals from her hand. If that's the quality of life you want, then far be it from me to argue with your decision. If your want to watch your nice hard belly turn to fat and the muscles in your legs shrivel to mush and your arms become flabby from disuse, not to mention your chin and chest, then fine. Go to the altar with her and say, 'I do'.
"But if you want to be Athrun Zala, if you want to walk and jog and ski and climb mountains, which is what you told me you wanted, then you'd better set her straight or ditch her altogether."
"Athrun!"
Cagalli disregarded Meer's exclamation of outrage and drove her point home. "Before you make up your, though, consider this. When the ski season rolls around and all her buddies are jetting off to Saint-Moritz, where do you think that'll leave you? Huh? I'll tell you. Alone. Abandoned. Because she'll go to Saint-Moritz. And you'll urge her to go because you'll feel guilty because she's sacrificed so much for you. You'll be left cooed up in some stuffy bedroom with an even stuffer servant, who will despise and deride you for your weakness and take his sweet time in answering the tinkling little bell on your nightstand.
"While your kind wife is out taking on the slopes—and probably a few ski instructors, because by now the newness of the noble gesture will have worn off and she'll be thinking that she made a bad deal—you'll be lying helpless and useless. You'll be torturing yourself, wondering who she's with and what she's doing. You'll be remembering with bitterness the days when you picked up ski bunnies and took them home to snuggle. You'll be lamenting the days when you controlled a globe-spanning corporation and left people breathless in your energetic wake.
"Eventually she'll leave you more frequently to go sailing or grouse shooting or meet a lover, and then the day will come when it's just not chic to be married to a paraplegic anymore and she'll divorce you and probably take off with a few of your millions, which she'll feel she earned for giving you her time and trouble."
"Of all the—I won't stand here and—"
"You're free to leave anytime, Meer," Athrun said blandly.
"What? I wouldn't think of leaving you alone with this wretched person. She's obviously unbalanced."
"I'm no such thing," Cagalli shot back. "And as for being alone with him, I was here for weeks before you showed up."
Snow White's cheeks turned a deep, rosy pink. "What does she mean by that, Athrun?"
"Use your imagination, Meer," he said.
"You actually engaged in . . . in . . ."
"Sexual dalliances. Can't you bring yourself to say it?" Cagalli tauted. "He kissed me. More than once."
"Not only kissed, but enjoyed," Athrun added softly. "Very much."
Meer was rendered speechless by the impetus behind his whispered words. So was Cagalli. She locked states with Athrun and it was several moments before she could continue. "Which berings us around to the subject of sex."
"It does?" he smiled that grin, that endearing, beautiful, wonderful grin that gave his face a piratical aspect.
"That's what this is really all about, isn't it?" Cagalli asked rhetorically, as though they were alone. "You're afraid that if you don't grab the first woman who is sympathetic to your condition, you might miss out on women altogether. Athrun," she said earnestly, "if I thought she was sincere, I'd pin a medal of self-sacrifice on her myself. But if I were you, I'd examine why she conceded the point of not having children so quickly."
Both ignored Meer's grasp. Cagalli plunged on. "Did you ever think that she might be relieved? Maybe she's glad she won't have a husband who'll demand that she dutifully eke out an offspring. I doubt she would want to sacrifice her figure or her time to a child. She jus doesn't seem cut to breast-feed and change diapers. And while a nanny can do one, she sure as hell can't do the other."
"Breast-feeding isn't essential," he reminded her quietly.
"To me it would be."
"Would it?"
Deep down inside, Cagalli quivered. "That's not the issue. You're getting me off the track." She began again. "I didn't think you'll have a single problem in your marital bed, either for recreational or procreational purposes. To any woman who truly loves you, it won't matter either way. But I know it matter to you. So if you're that worried about its not working, I'd rather you try it out on me before taking a chance that it won't and marrying Snow White."
A stunned silence followed. None was more stunned than Cagalli. She heard her own words, but she couldn't believe that she'd spoken them. It had been an impulsive statement. Through now that she had time to review it, she realized that it was true and conveyed her deepest feelings.
She didn't mind what Meer thought about her speaking her heart, but she did mind what Athrun thought. She couldn't bear looking into his eyes. They revealed nothing except the intensity of his reaction. But the reaction itself remained a mystery.
Turning on her bare heel, she left the room.
Several ponderously silent seconds ticked by before Meer daintily cleared her throat and spoke. "Can you believe that a hired person would have the gall to speak so candidly about what is absolutely none of her affair? What a trial she must have been for you, darling." She shivered with revulsion. "I'm amazed you tolerated her this long. I'll see that she's packed and out of the house by nightfall."
Athrun caught her arm as she brushed past his chair. She glanced down, surprise by the strength of his grip. "Cagalli won't be packing, but you will."
"You can't be serious, Athrun. Surely you didn't put stock in anything that derange woman said? You couldn't have. You're more intelligent than that."
"I'm very intelligent. That's why I keep tabs on every acquaintances, friends, enemy." He paused before adding to his distaste, "And Lover." He released her arm and leaned back in his wheelchair. "Cagalli didn't tell me anything I didn't already know." He smiled thoughtfully, as if momentarily distracted. "Not about you anyway."
When his attention focused back on Meer, his expression turned serious again. "I know about the creditors beating down your door."
"How crass of you to mention finances, Athrun."
"I wouldn't if finances weren't the reason you're here." He pressed on before she could offer a lame denial. "We had some good time, Meer."
"You—"
He shrugged off her scathing insult. "I was never close to marrying you. Not by a long shot. I knew from the moment we met why you pursued me so relentlessly."
"I fell instantly in love," she cried.
"With my stock portfolio."
"That's not true. I care for you deeply. I came here to—"
"To do exactly as Cagalli guessed. You wanted to smother me with your tender, loving care until I married you out of gratitude. And it would have been a bargain for both of us. I would have a wife who tolerated my incapacities. You would have a husband with the means to buy you out of hock.
"Only you miscalculated one thing," he continued. "I won't settle for being nursed for the rest of my life. I've always done things myself. I refuse to let this setback be anything but temporary. I might have to run my corporation from a wheelchair, but I'll never become a bedridden invalid content to let my brain atrophy while my loving wife takes advantage of me."
"You seemed to enjoy being an invalid the last couple of days." She remarked.
"You caught me on an off day," he said with chagrin. "I was sulking because Cagalli had spurned me. Besides, I wanted to see how far you would go. It's a cliché, but I gave you enough rope and you hanged yourself."
"I was being put through a silly test, is that it?"
"No, actually Cagalli was. She passed her test with flying colors. You flunked."
Meer's lips curled with contempt. "Speaking of clichés, your attraction to this foulmouthed tart is laughable and pathetic. Any man in your condition would fancy himself in love with his physical therapist."
"That's almost verbatim what she said. But I don't think either of you is right."
"And you pride yourself on your intellect," she sneered. "Don't you see that's she's the only woman available to you?"
"You've been available, Meer," he reminded her softly. "I didn't want you, did I?"
"Bastard."
He looked taken aback. "And you accused Cagalli of being foulmouthed?"
"She dresses like a whore!"
"Don't talk about her like that, and you were the one willing to sell herself."
"I can't believe that you seriously want her."
"Oh, I want her," he said as a slow grin spread across his face. "And I intend to take her up to her offer."
OOOOoo
From her bedroom window Cagalli watched Pete hold open the back door of the car for a huffy Meer. After she had climbed in, he went around to the driver's side. Poor Pete. He would have to endure the ride to the airport in Meer's company. She didn't appear to be in the best of humors.
As for Cagalli, her heart was soaring.
She had overcome all the obstacles standing in the way of Athrun's recovery: his initial rage, his adolescent puppy lover for her, his sympathetic ally. Invariably patients had a friend or spouse who countermanded the therapist's instructions. Though they were motivated by love and compassion, they were detrimental to the patient's progress.
Hopefully Athrun and she had seen the last of Meer von Campbell. It should be smooth sailing from here on.
Well, there was that one tiny personal glitch, but Cagalli choose to shelve that dilemma for the time being.
She waited until the car's taillights had disappeared into the dusky twilight before she went to Athrun's door and knocked. Getting his permission, she slipped inside the room. She stayed near the door, stricken by a sudden and uncharacteristic shyness.
"She's gone."
"Good riddance."
She shook her head in puzzlement. "You're not upset?"
"Vastly relieved."
"Care to explain?"
"Nope."
"Had a dilly of a fight, did ya?"
"My lips are sealed."
"Damn! I was hoping to hear all the juicy details."
"Sorry to disappoint you," Athrun said, smiling hugely, "but I'll save the explanation for another time. I've had all the Meer I can stand for one day."
Brimming with pleasure over his words, Cagalli said, "She had the house in an uproar while she was packing and making travel arrangements. I decided to postpone your session until after she left."
"I sensed that was the reason for the delay. But now that you're here, can we do the bars again?"
She thumped the side of her head with heel of her hand. "Am I hearing right? Aren't you the patient who put up such a stink about the bars this morning?"
"I've had a change of heart."
"So, I see. Well—"
"Oh, wait. Where's my poster? The one Meer called 'an abominable eyesore' that was desecrating my walls."
"That bitch!" Cagalli exclaimed, popping her hands on her hips. "She said that about my poster? What could she find wrong with a picture of a lady and a fruit basket?"
"I don't think she object to the subject matter. It was the juxtaposition of the lady and the banana that she found fault with."
"Some people have no taste."
"Where is it?" he asked, laughing at her exasperation.
"In my room. She told Pete to throw it away, but he passed it to me."
"Bring it back."
Looking perturbed, but actually extremely pleased, Cagalli went to her room and came back with the poster. She replaced it on the nail she'd hammered into the wall herself.
When she had the frame hanging straight, Athrun said, "There. Much better. Now we can get started."
They went to the bars again. His arms supported him better than during the morning session, but he relied more to his legs too. She had to coax him to quit. "Athrun, you're wearing yourself out."
"Five more minutes."
"What good will you be tomorrow if you exhaust yourself tonight?"
"I'm not exhausted, I'm exhilarated."
Eventually she urged him back to his wheelchair. "Let's skip the mat table. Get back to the bed. I'll give you rubdown there. I think you could use a sponge bath too."
It was after his sponge bath and after his rubdown and when she was saying good night that he looked up at her beguilingly and asked, "What about the other?"
"The other?'
"The recreational and procreational marital bed skills I'm going to get so god at with your help." His voice dropped to a husky pitch. "When do we start working on those?"
OOOOoo
AN: To be truthful I was kinda in the bad mood when I wrote the first half but then something came up and my mood change. So please review, any constructive review or just review, to keep my current mood last. Also, Thank you for those who previously reviewed ^-^ . . . don't forget R&R.