ROAD TRIP
Chapter 11: "Kumamon Attacks"
A Neo-Sailor Moon fanfic

By Bill K.

A waitress approached the table where Jun sat. Jun was in the inn's dining area, looking at the menu displayed on an electronic computer screen. The woman caught her eye and she looked up with some surprise. Many restaurants had robotic food servers, but she was coming to find out that inns in Japan still employed human servers.

"Are you ready to order?" she asked crisply. She was no older than Jun, with short black hair and a kewpie doll cute face like a hundred Jun had seen on various ads. Her uniform was a stylized kimono altered to make it easier to carry food.

"Yeah," Jun said, shaking herself. "Guess I'm not used to human servers."

"We're pretty unique to inns," the woman smiled. "The inns feel it makes the guests feel more comfortable." She noticed Jun rubbing her neck. "All you all right?"

"Fell asleep in the bathroom," Jun replied reluctantly. "Got a stiff neck."

"I'm so sorry."

"OK, breakfast," Jun said, looking at the menu. "What is Basashi?"

"Oh, you have the dinner menu queued up," the server said and pressed a stud on the screen. The contents shifted to a different menu.

"Ah, that's more like it," Jun nodded. "What is Basashi, anyway? I've never heard of it. Maybe you can tell, but I'm not from Japan."

"Basashi is raw horse meat," the server replied matter-of-factly.

"R-raw . . .?" sputtered Jun.

"It's a traditional delicacy here in Kumamoto," the server replied. "Although it's not really something we have for breakfast."

"Raw horse meat," mumbled Jun in shock.

"I can get you some if you really want it," the server offered.

"Uh, I don't," Jun stammered, "think so. Nothing against your customs. How about I have the breakfast platter here."

"An excellent choice," the server said. She bowed and scampered off. Jun sat there for a moment. Then she pressed the stud on the menu and brought the dinner menu back.

"Raw horse meat," Jun thought. "And Cere used to make a face when I told her I ate ants back in the Amazon rain forest."

Once breakfast was done, Jun climbed aboard her bike and headed for the greatest thing Kumamoto was known for, even in the thirtieth century: Kumamoto Castle. By this time, though, the actual castle and its twentieth century replica had long since decayed and fallen down. What stood on the site was a carefully crafted replica of the feudal era fortress made of molded poly-tetrathane resin. The ornate wood portions looked and felt like real wood and the stone portions looked and felt like real stone, but it had lasted for two hundred and fifty years and was designed to last for two hundred more.

Jun looked up at it from street level. Her expression was less than enthusiastic.

"I don't know," Jun thought, wiping the perspiration from her forehead. "I know this has some sort of historical significance to the Japanese, but to me it's just an old building. Maybe it's because I'm from Colombia."

"It's a wonderful looking castle, isn't it?"

Jun turned to the voice, prepared to politely disagree. However, the sight that greeted her wasn't what she expected. After all, who outside of someone from Kumamoto would expect to be next to a six foot black bear with large anime-style eyes and large red circles on its cheeks. So startled was Jun that she reared back, lost her balance and tumbled from her idling bike.

"Oh dear," the bear said, leaning in to extend a paw. "Please forgive me for startling you!"

"W-What the Hell are you?" Jun gasped, scrambling to her feet without assistance and keeping the bike between her and the bear.

"I'm Kumamon," the bear replied. It was then that Jun noticed the fixed stare of the eyes and the mechanical movements of the mouth. "I'm the official mascot of the city of Kumamoto."

"You're a robot!" Jun exclaimed. By now people passing by were glancing at them and smiling.

"I'm a roboticized tour guide," Kumamon told her. "I'm here to answer questions, give directions and recommendations, and extol the virtues of the city of Kumamoto."

"Are you programmed or are you remotely controlled?

"Remotely controlled," Kumamon explained. "I'm in an office in the municipal building, controlling this unit remotely. This is just one of two dozen Kumamon robots scattered through the city. We're here to assist tourists and citizens alike." The bear leaned in. "You kind of look like a tourist. May I be of assistance?"

"Maybe," Jun shrugged. "I'm passing through on my way to Minami-Satsuma and I thought I'd look around while I'm here. Is there some place exciting - - and climate controlled?" She gestured to Kumamoto Castle. "I'm afraid castles just aren't my thing. No offense."

"None taken," Kumamon replied. "There are holographic theaters throughout the city. I can give you directions. Or there are several dance venues, but they don't operate during the day. We have many fine restaurants. And there is also the Suizenji-Joju-En Garden by Surenji Temple."

"Hmm," Jun replied in a non-committal fashion. "How about I just cruise around the city until lunch. But thanks anyway."

"As you wish," Kumamon said and bowed to her. "Please enjoy your stay in Kumamoto. If you need assistance, please seek out one of the Kumamon throughout the city."

"Oh, I will," Jun nodded. She donned her helmet and engaged her bike. But thirty feet from the robot, Jun began to smile. The smile began a chuckle and the chuckle morphed into a laugh. By the time she reached the intersection, Jun was laughing so hard that she almost drove her bike into an information sign.

A half hour later, Jun pulled her bike to a curb, doffed her helmet and wiped her face with a cloth. It was another hot, humid day in Kumamoto and while the city was interesting just for its sheer difference from Crystal Tokyo, this was not the day for cruising in a helmet and protective jacket.

"I've got to find some shelter from this heat. So, holographic theater or restaurant?" Jun thought. "It's too early to eat lunch. May be too early for a holo." She pondered for a moment. Then she smiled. "I know just the place."

Spotting a Kumamon robot nearby, Jun waved it over. The black bear, which was kind of cute once one got used to it, started for her. But on the way, it was intercepted by several children roughly five years old and surrounded.

"Kumamon! Kumamon!" shouted one child.

"I'm your biggest fan, Kumamon!" another cried.

"Please let me kiss you, Kumamon!" squealed another.

As the children jumped and shouted, each one trying to occupy the bear's attention, the bear knelt down in the center. One of the girls instantly kissed him on the nose and hugged him.

"I'm so happy to know how much you love me," Kumamon replied in the same synthesized voice Jun had heard earlier. "I just love each and every one of you."

"Come home with me, Kumamon!" one of the boys shouted. "You can live in my room!"

"No, come home with me!" cried one of the girls.

"But all of Kumamoto is my home," the bear replied. "And I'm very happy here. But you all can visit me any time you want, as long as your parents say it's all right. Now I have to help that lady over there," and it pointed to Jun. "You all go back to your parents now. And remember to always be good."

There were groans and protests, but the kids let Kumamon pass and the robot made its way over to Jun. She was leaning on the handlebars of her bike, smiling.

"The kids sure love you," Jun remarked.

"Yes, they do," Kumamon replied. "Now how may I be of assistance to you?"

"I just need directions to the nearest library."

Five minutes later, Jun pulled up and parked her bike next to the Kumamoto municipal library. As she headed in, she could hear the voices of Ves and Cere in her head, groaning and chuckling about something she found entertaining that they thought was boring.

Didn't matter; books always reminded her of her childhood and her guardian. Books were the paths to adventure and romance that she couldn't or hadn't experienced in real life. Books had been her first friends.

Of course these days most books were recorded on flash drive crystals rather than paper. But they were still books. Jun entered the building, sighed happily as the climate controlled air hit her skin, and headed off to find the romance section. But on the way, she saw a display case. Heading over, she looked and gasped.

It was a book. An actual book, twentieth to twenty-first century vintage from the looks of it. Jun stared down at it, struggling to read the Japanese kanji that it was written in. After a few moments, she noticed an older lady was standing next to her.

"That's 'The Book of Five Rings' by Musashi Miyamoto," the woman said. Jun glanced at her and assumed she was a librarian. "He was from this area of Japan. That particular hardbound edition dates back to 2038. It's one of the last mass-produced hardbound copies printed in Japan before we converted to electronic tablet files."

"Wow," Jun said in awe. "I wish I could touch it."

"Probably not a good idea," the librarian smiled. "That case is climate controlled and has a chemical circulating that retards oxidation of the acids that were found in commercially produced paper at that time. It keeps the pages from turning to dust."

"Do you have any others?"

"A few," she replied. "If you really want to see a large collection of ancient books, go to the collection at Kumamoto Castle." She paused for a moment, but Jun didn't respond. "Was there something I could help you with?"

"Your romance section?" Jun asked, slightly chagrined. "I want to see if you have anything I haven't read."

At noon, Jun emerged from the municipal library, notes on some new romance novel titles on her PDA. She would have stayed all day, but it was time for lunch and the library didn't have a cafeteria or food stand. At once the humidity of the day hit her in the face like a slap. She groaned.

"Nearest restaurant," Jun muttered. "I don't care what they serve."

Astride her bike, Jun cruised the area looking for a restaurant that was climate controlled. The humidity was really bothering her; given her origins, that fact also bothered her. She began contemplating it, but her thoughts were interrupted. A Kumamon robot unexpectedly darted out into traffic. The hover car whose path it crossed slammed to a stop. Jun could see it wouldn't be able to stop in time.

But the robot wasn't struck, for it leaped onto the hood of the hover car at the last second. Crouching on the hood, it began slamming its fists down on the hood and windshield of the vehicle. Panic-stricken, the operator bailed out of the cab and onto the pavement. He looked back, only to have the robot bear stop hammering and look ominously at him. That was enough to send the man running.

Kumamon ignored the fleeing man. It leaped down onto the sidewalk, scattering several pedestrians. Grasping a metal waste receptacle in its hands, the robot ripped the receptacle out of its moorings and flung it through the front window of a flower shop.

"What the Hell is up with that robot?" Jun gasped.

Seeing it spot a female pedestrian and take off running after her as she fled in terror, Jun parked her bike. As she dismounted, she summoned her henshin stick.

"Juno Planet Power Make Up!"

Once transformed, Sailor Juno was off in pursuit of the berserk robot. Turning a corner, she found the robot had caught the fleeing woman and was kissing her.

"Back off, whatever you are!" Sailor Juno roared.

The Kumamon robot turned to Juno, allowing the woman to flee. It had the same glassy stare and fixed smile that the other robots possessed. But there was something about the way it was crouched and the way it stared at her that gave off ominous vibes. Juno decided not to take any chances.

"Aqua Initiation!" she called out. As water formed in her hands and took the shape of a large soccer ball-sized globe, several CDP security drones circled the scene, ordering both the robot and Juno to cease and directing pedestrians to safety.

Juno fired the water globe at the Kumamon robot. It dodged the attack and lunged toward her. But in this case, the humid air was an ally to Juno. The saturated air gave her ample ammunition to fight with. Another globe formed almost instantly and Juno launched it with all the force she could muster. The globe struck the robot square in the chest and the force knocked it on its back.

With the sirens of CDP hover cars echoing in the distance, the robot began to pull itself off of the sidewalk. The process may have been awkward for the robot, but it was relentless. Quickly Juno prepared a counter measure. As the robot bear regained its full height, Juno enveloped it in a water globe, much as she had the two con artists earlier in her trip. This time, though, there was no intent to drown. Juno sought to saturate the robot, flood its systems and hopefully short out its electronics. A CDP patrol hover car pulled up and two CDP officers barreled out.

"Are you Sailor Juno?" one of the officers gaped. "What are you doing in Kumamoto?"

"Bear hunting, apparently," Juno replied. "Any idea why this robot went berserk?"

"None. But we're glad you're here to help. How long will you be able to hold it in that water bubble?"

Suddenly the water globe was lit up with electricity sparking from the joints of the Kumamon robot. It shook and flailed helplessly within the globe, then went limp. Juno released the globe and the robot fell to the sidewalk, inert.

"Mommy!" they heard a child shriek and turned to her. "Mommy, they killed Kumamon! Mommy!"

It was a four-year-old girl with her mother, wide-eyed with shock. As the girl dissolved into hysterical tears, Juno and the officers looked at each other. How to explain this? As the mother tried to comfort her daughter, she glanced over at them with a venomous look.

Then, inspired by memories of all the times she'd had to deal with the childish behavior of Palla-Palla, Juno got an idea. She quietly told the officers to load the Kumamon robot into their car, then walked over to the child. The child looked up at her fearfully, but Juno knelt down in front of her with a reassuring smile.

"Why did you kill Kumamon?" the child wailed.

"We didn't kill Kumamon," Juno told her. "Kumamon is just sleeping. We had to put him to sleep because," and Juno thought quickly, "he was possessed - - by a demon. And the demon was making him do bad things, things Kumamon would never do."

"Are you going to wake him up?"

"Those CDP officers over there are taking Kumamon to a powerful priest," Juno explained. "And the priest will drive the demon away, and then Kumamon will wake up. You'll see him again. I promise."

"Really?"

"You know who I am, don't you?"

"Uh huh. You're Sailor Vesta."

Juno scowled momentarily. "Yeah, I'm - - Sailor Vesta. And Sailor Senshi don't lie, do they?" The child shook her head. "So don't worry. Kumamon's all right."

A hopeful smile sprouted on the young girl's face. And Sailor Juno felt like she'd just bested a twenty foot giant.

"Did they ever find out why the robot went berserk?"

Juno was talking to Cere from her room at the inn in Kumamoto. She lay in the soft bed, her hand cradling her PDA

"Some smart-ass twelve year old who wanted to prove how clever he was hacked into the robot's remote guidance control," Jun explained.

"Did the CDP arrest him?"

"Yeah. Back-hacked his wireless signal and came up with his address. Had him in restraints about an hour after it happened. Usa would have been proud."

"No doubt," Cere chuckled. "Good thing we don't have those things in Crystal Tokyo."

"Worried someone might hack them?"

"That, plus the thought of a six foot black bear with an anime face just makes me want to vomit. I can only take so much 'cutesy'." Cere paused, suddenly nervous. "So," she began, "when are you coming home?"

"I haven't even gotten to Minami-Satsuma yet!" howled Jun. "Don't tell me you miss me."

"OK, I won't tell you," Cere sniffed haughtily. Then she became serious. "Jun, I've been told that I made you feel uncomfortable about who you are. If I did, it wasn't intentional. Sometimes I don't think. And," and she paused to gather herself, "if I did do that, I'm sorry. And Ves is sorry, too, though you'll never hear her admit it."

"Kind of figured," Jun smiled. "Apology accepted. I probably do things that hurt your feelings, too. If I did, it's not intentional."

"Good. Now can you come home?" Cere whined. "Palla-Palla asks me that about once an hour and if I have to listen to the question one more time, I'm going to strangle her!"

"Sorry. Not yet," Jun offered. "But tell her it'll be soon."

Jun glanced over at the dresser. Sitting on the dresser was a Kumamon doll that she'd purchased in the inn's gift shop.

"And tell her I'll have a present for her."

Concluded in Chapter 12