A/N: I wasn't planning on posting this so soon after the last chapter, but I just got really excited about this one. I hope you guys all enjoy it! It feels like the story is really coming to its climax, and that is very very exciting for me as a writer! Please let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: JKR is Queen.
May 26th, 2029
Present Day.
It took Rose all of thirty seconds to realize that she should not be kissing Scorpius Malfoy in her grandparents' backyard.
She was engaged, for Merlin's sake, to another man.
Rose detached herself from Malfoy and stood, as quickly as possible. She could see him through the darkness, sitting stock still where she'd left him in the grass, peering up at her, breathing heavily from their kiss.
"I can't do this," she told him wildly, blindly, "I have to go." With that, she turned on her heel and apparated into the night.
Rose appeared again in the flat that she and Al shared, and immediately began pacing anxiously. It was not like her to run away from situations, but this had gotten out of hand, and she didn't see any way around it. She had to get away from Malfoy before she'd done something regretful and thrown all caution to the wind. Rose was a rational, reasonable person, but when it came to Scorpius Malfoy, it seemed that all bets were off. Rose knew that was a dangerous way to live.
It was only when she was alone that she realized she'd not only skipped out on James' birthday party, but had left before Simon, her fiancé, had even arrived. She was going to have to make some good excuses later on. Merlin, why did she even go to the party in the first place?
Less than a minute after she'd apparated, she heard another loud pop join her. Bollocks, Rose thought to herself. She knew who it would be, even before she turned around. Of course she'd forgotten in her haste that Scorpius had been to her flat before, all those years ago.
She turned to him, wild fear in her eyes, her hair whipping out of its carefully designed updo.
"We need to talk about this," he insisted, his demeanor startlingly cool and calm.
"You need to get out of my flat." She countered, giving up on trying to fix her hair and angrily tearing her curls from their fancy chignon.
"Rose," he said, firmly, "you can't run from me every time I try to tell you how I feel about you."
' For the first time, Rose found she was unarmed with a sarcastic or biting retort. She was confused, and she was heartbroken. And most of all, Rose was tired.
"Please just leave." She pleaded, sinking into a chair at their small dining table, her head in her hands. She looked like the ultimate picture of defeat.
Rose heard a chair scrape out from the table beside her and his weight drop into it. He sighed, and tentative hands began to smooth the wild curls away from her face. She instinctively leaned into his warm palm, despite her begging him to go.
"Rose." He said quietly after a moment's pause. She said nothing in return, but she could feel hot, wet tears prickle at the corners of her eyes.
"I know you don't want to hear it right now," he continued, "but I need you to know how I feel about you. You have no idea, it absolutely kills me that in a month, you will be married to somebody that isn't me."
Rose choked back a sob, not trusting herself to speak.
"I was wasting away in that stupid cell, with nothing to live for until they mentioned your wedding announcement in the paper. Rose, it's like I knew in an instant why I was still alive. I knew I needed to find you, to tell you what I couldn't say all those years ago when the time was right."
He turned his chair, so that he was sitting directly in front of Rose, and used his hand to raise her chin, so that their eyes were on an equal level. He stared into her blue orbs, and the emotions dancing across his face read as clearly to Rose as they ever had. She knew what he was going to say, and yet she waited with baited breath for the words she'd longed to hear for years, from a man she never thought she'd get the chance to hear them from. It seemed almost surreal, as if everything around them moved in a slow-motion dream sequence. Rose counted each of his long eyelashes, and marveled at how dark they were, compared to his fine, fair hair. The moment stretched on for what seemed like years, or perhaps an eternity, while Rose waited for the words she'd yearned to hear for years.
Scorpius seemed to understand her train of thought, because he gave her a sad smile and cupped her cheek before speaking softly.
"I love you, Rose Weasley." He said, breathing his warm, sweet breath over her face. "I can't bear the idea of you marrying another man, because I want to be the one to spend my life making you happy. I'm not saying to chuck him and marry me instead, because I'm not crazy enough to think that you would be happy moving on that fast, but please, Rose. If there is even the slightest chance that you feel the same about me - the way I think you do, please reconsider this wedding."
As Rose listened, she felt a million mixed emotions bubbling inside her, threatening to spill over. Relief, as she had expected, and a thrilling tingle that coursed through her veins. But there was more than just that. It's not fair. She thought to herself, suddenly incensed. After all this time, it's not fair. At this last thought, she rose from her chair furiously.
"It's not that easy!" She yelled, her chest heaving. He stopped, finally shocked into silence. She took a deep breath, centering herself, and continued. "It's not as easy as all this. You don't get to just come back into my life after three years to derail my life and muck everything up; you don't get to do that."
He listened, stock-still, only his grey eyes roving over her face, as she spoke.
"You don't understand, Scorpius," she choked out, "When you died that day, a part of me died along with you. I was… Merlin! I was less than a shell." Her hands came up to massage her temples, and she prayed to some higher power that she could make it through what she needed to say without succumbing to her emotions and breaking down. "I thought I would never be happy again. You left me… all on my own."
His mouth parted slightly, but no words came out. Rose continued, finding it difficult to meet his gaze.
"It took me months - no, years to be happy again, and Simon was a big part of that process. And that's why this is so damned complicated." She smiled sadly, knowing she was fighting a losing battle as far as tears were concerned.
The deafening silence threatened to engulf them as Rose wrung her hands worriedly, holding back the words that terrified her to the core. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks as she paced around the kitchen. Rose hiccupped loudly and suddenly realized the full extent of ridiculousness of the situation. She laughed, sounding half-manic, half tortured. More laughter bubbled up inside her, until she was expelling loud cackles that turned into choking sobs. Scorpius looked on helplessly, his face a mixed bag of emotions. Rose fought to regain composure for a moment, before deciding to just let it be.
"I love you, Scorpius," she said through her tears, finally able to meet his eyes again. "I've loved you for years… I just…" she stifled a cry, "…I don't know if I could go through the pain of losing you again."
She didn't know when he had gotten up from his chair, but suddenly, Scorpius was right next to her, wrapping his strong arms around her quaking torso. Rose stilled for a moment, fearful that he would try to kiss her again. Her guard was completely torn down, and she didn't know if she could resist him any further if he were to kiss her now. But he simply rested his chin atop her head, his hands making comforting circular motions on her back as he held her pressed to his warm chest.
Rose breathed in his familiar scent, calming her frazzled nerves. Just when she had regained some semblance of self-control, Scorpius gently kissed the top of her head, and she felt the tears prick at the corner of her eyes again.
"You don't have to lose me," he murmured while holding her so tightly, as if she would slip away otherwise. "You never have to be without me again, Rose."
"I'm sorry," she whispered to him, breathing out the words more than speaking them, "I wish things could be different."
Several moments passed before he said anything, and when he did, Rose had to strain to hear the words he sighed back in response.
"So do I," he said.
Rose was a mess.
She called off sick for a week, ate all her meals from delivery services that her owl, Marjorie, delivered straight to her room. When Al knocked on her door, worried and confused, she could give no real answer as to why she felt this way, only that she did.
"Should I get Simon for you?" he asked, and Rose could just picture him on the other side of the thick wooden door, running his hands through his jet black hair the way he always did when he was troubled.
"No," Rose sighed, burrowing deeper into her thick duvet. "I just want to be alone."
She continued on this way until Friday evening, ignoring all owls from her family and friends, and avoiding human contact at all costs. That is, until it marched its way in.
Rose was awakened by a firm voice saying "Lumos." Suddenly, everything in her room was much, much too bright.
"Rose Weasley," the voice snapped, making her feel instantly ten years old, "Get out of bed, this has gone on long enough."
"Mum?" she said, blinking as her eyes adjusted to the light. Finally, the older, frizzy-haired woman came into focus, standing at the foot of her bed with her arms crossed in a way Rose knew meant business.
Hermione sighed heavily, smoothing down the corner of the bed so that she could sit upon it, next to her daughter. As her mother looked into her eyes, Rose was concerned to see that her fizzy hair had tinges of grey streaked through it and there were worried wrinkles on her forehead that she had not previously noticed, though they must have been there before. For the first time, Rose marveled at the fact that her parents, the strongest and most brilliant people she knew, were getting older. She wished suddenly very much to be back at home, eleven years old and full of life and naivety about the world around her.
"Oh mum," she said, and folded into the arms of the older woman, tucking her head beneath her mother's pointed chin.
They stayed for a moment like that, breathing in and out. Rose struggled against the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes as she hugged her mum as if her life depended on it. When was the last time they had done this?
Finally, Hermione pulled back, wiping the wetness from Rose's eyes and smoothing down her red curls tenderly. "Why don't you tell me what's wrong?" She probed gently.
Rose looked at her hands, wondering how to find the words.
"What if… what if the plans you made for yourself and the life you thought you wanted somehow suddenly feels… wrong?" she started, frowning. She looked up at her mother to see warm, understanding brown eyes and felt compelled to continue. "It's just that… I thought everything was so planned and perfect, and now it all seems as if everything has changed."
"Oh Rosie," her mother began, with a small smile, "There's no way to plan for what life happens to throw at you next. You just have to take things as they come, and make the best decision for you at the time."
"Even if it hurts somebody?" Rose couldn't help but ask.
Hermione frowned, and sighed deeply. "Sometimes," she began slowly, "Hurting somebody now, no matter how bad it may be, can save even more heartache in the long run."
Rose nodded, understanding what her mother was trying to say. She smiled up at the older woman, and received an identical one in return. Rose had been told all her life how much she looked like her father, with his height and his ginger coloring, but she had the smile and the spirit of her mother.
"Mum?" Rose couldn't resist asking one more question. Hermione raised an eyebrow, allowing Rose to continue. "How did you know, when you knew – When you knew that dad was the one for you?" She blushed slightly.
Hermione laughed, her brown eyes sparkling. "I didn't know, not for a long time," she admitted, shrugging, "But when I knew, it was because I admired him, and admired the way he treated me, and made me feel. Above all, we respected each other and worked well as a team. That's how I knew." She touched her daughter's cheek lovingly. "And I'm so glad I did know, because it gave me you, and your brother. And you two are my very, very best achievements."
Rose beamed up at her mum, feeling as if the weight had been lifted off her heart for the first time in weeks.
"Though that was probably spurred more by the physical attraction than our mutual respect, to be honest." Hermione added.
"Ugh! Mum! Gross!" Rose pulled a face, and then laughed, despite herself.
Hermione got up, making her way to the door.
"I suggest you shower and get dressed, your grandmother is throwing you and Simon a shower before the wedding. I figured you'd forgotten," She explained, tossing a parcel onto the bed. "So I got you some dress robes to wear. Nana Molly is insisting that this party at least be in the Wizarding tradition, since the wedding itself won't be. I will see you tonight."
She paused in the doorway, and turned back to Rose, who was still on the bed, clutching the package of her dress robes.
"And Rose? I have every confidence that you'll make the right choice."
Rose smiled and nodded. She knew what she needed to do.
Yay! Another chapter done - sorry it was a bit short, but very important scenes obviously. More to come very, very soon!