Uchiha Sasuke was training…to slit his wrists…using a dummy…yes, he was training to slit his wrists using a dummy, when the dummy ate him, and he landed…in my room.

Where am I! Has a dummy just eaten me?

Hehehe…

What the… who is this?

HehehHAHAhehe…

What the heck are you laughing at?

Well, I just told Lee that Neji loves him, so he's gone chasing after Neji to tell him how he feels, but I then told Gai that he and Lee are dating, and that Neji's trying to steal Lee away from him, so now I'm watching Gai trying to kill Neji, Neji going "I don't know what you're talking about, I'm an asexual", which is such a lie, cause it's soo obvious that he has a crush on TenTen, and then we have Lee in the middle going, "No! But I love him!!!" And the best thing is, I'VE GOT IT ALL ON TAPE!!

…So … Does Neji really like Lee?

…No, but Lee will believe anything you tell him.

Hm…And did Lee and Gai ever start dating?

…umm…nyo, but They'll believe anything you tell him.

So, Lee's bent on killing Gai, for trying to kill Neji, who's trying to kill Lee, who got him into this mess in the first place?

…Yup.

But it wasn't really his fault, it was yours.

…Yup.

So Neji should really be killing you.

A lot of people should really be killing me. In fact, if the people who should be killing me did kill me, I WOULD'VE DIED YEARS AGO! Anyway, what are you complaining about? The four people you hate the most are killing eachother!

What do you mean four?

Oh, well Itachi just walked by, and now everyone's killing him.

Oh. You say you've got it on tape?

…Why yes, yes I do.

Do you think you can give me a copy?

Of course!

Yay!

After I torture you.

Wha?

Uchiha Sasuke, he's not really fussed about Itachi killing the whole Uchiha Clan, It's just that he stole Sasuke's favourite teddy when he was younger.

Hey, that's not true.

Awwww…. Sasuke's trying to be a big boy, is he?

Shut up.

No. Uchiha Sasuke, he has a pet duck that he keeps on his head at all times.

That is soo not true! His hair gets up and flies away. Ehh…

O.o

O.o

O.o

O.o

…WTF!?

Umm…

…O…M…G.

Ehh…

Uchiha Sasuke is bald.

…Kuso.

Uchiha Sasuke, is a girl.

Psst! LIIEESS! They're all lies!

Is also an emo.

…Am not.

So now you know, Uchiha Sasuke, a bald, female emo who wears a pet duck on his head at all times, and had his teddy stolen by Itachi when he was younger.

That's it. I'm leaving. Gets up and walks away.

Hey wait you forgot your tape!

A/N

I don't know whom to torture next. Please tell me by reviewing.