And yes, before anyone asks, this is based of Charlie the Unicorn. XD
Jayfeather was sleeping in his nest in the Medicine cat's den when Lionblaze and Dovewing snuck up on him. "Hey, Jayfeather, hey Jayfeather wake up." Lionblaze meowed, poking him.
Dovewing started poking Jayfeather too. "Yeah Jayfeather, you silly sleepy head, wake up!" she agreed. Jayfeather slowly rose his head.
"Oh StarClan you guys. This better be pretty freaking important. Is the camp on fire?" he snapped.
Lionblaze shook his head. "No Jayfeather, we found a map to Candy Mountain. Candy Mountain Jayfeather." He explained.
"Yeah Jayfeather! We're going to Candy Mountain. Come with us Jayfeather!" Dovewing meowed.
"Yeah Jayfeather! It will be an adventure! We're going on an adventure, Jayfeather!" Lionblaze concluded.
Jayfeather rolled his eyes. "Yeah! Candy Mountain, right…" he scoffed. " I'm just gonna, you know, go back to sleep now." He mumbled already falling back asleep, But Lionblaze had other ideas.
"Noooo! Jayfeather! You have to come with us to Candy Mountain!" Lionblaze shouted, doing a flip through the air and landing on Jayfeather, starting to bounce on him.
"Yeah Jayfeather, Candy Mountain, it's a land of sweets and joy and joyness!" Dovewing added. Jayfeather groaned.
"Please stop bouncing on me." The medicine-cat said, wincing from having Lionblaze jumping on him.
"Candy mountain Jayfeather!" Lionblaze meowed.
"Yeah, Candy Mountain." Dovewing begged.
Jayfeather sighed. "Alright, fine! I'll go with you to candy mountain!" he agreed.
"Yay!" Dovewing and Lionblaze shouted at the same time.
Walking to Candy mountain was quite a pain for Jayfeather. Between Lionblaze's and Dovewing's constant questions and singing, he was pretty sick of it. "La la la la!" the two warriors sang.
"Enough with the singing already!" Jayfeather groaned. For the first time, they actually stopped their singing and pointed to something up ahead.
"Our first stop is over there Jayfeather." Meowed Lionblaze. Unable to see, Jayfeather wondered what Lionblaze could possibly be pointing to. Then, a horrible scent filled his nose.
"Oh StarClan, what is that?" he asked.
"It's a badger Jayfeather." Lionblaze told him.
"A magical badger." Dovewing added.
"It's gonna guide our way to candy mountain!" Lionblaze said. Jayfeather sighed.
"Alright guys, you do know that there is no actual Candy Mountain right?" he pointed out.
"Shun the non-believer!" Lionblaze gasped.
"Shun!" Dovewing shouted.
"Shun!" Lionblaze yelled.
"Yeah?" Jayfeather meowed in annoyance. Suddenly, the badger started making odd noises.
"It has spoken!" Lionblaze announced.
"It has told us the way!" Dovewing added.
"It didn't say anything!" Jayfeather meowed.
"It's just over that bridge Jayfeather." Lionblaze meowed, pointing to a bridge.
"The magical bridge of hope and wonder!" Dovewing told him. As the three of them walked on the bridge, Jayfeather started to get covered in splinters.
"Is anyone else getting covered in splinters? Seriously, we shouldn't be on this thing." Jayfeather meowed.
"Jayfeather, Jaaayfeather, Jaaaayfeatheeeer, Jay-" Lionblaze said.
"I'm right here, what do you want?" The medicine-cat interupted.
"We're on a bridge Jayfeather!" Lionblaze meowed. As they stepped of the bridge, Lionblaze and Dovewing started screaming, and strong, sugary, scent reached his nose.
"We're here!" Dovewing screeched.
"Well, what do you know? There's actually a Candy Mountain!" Jayfeather said in disbelief.
"Candy Mountain! Candy Mountain, you fill me with sweet sugary goodness!" Lionblaze sang.
"Go inside Candy Mountain Cave, Jayfeather." Dovewing urged. Jayfeather shook his head.
"Yeah, thanks, but no thanks. I'm just going to stay out here. " Jayfeather said.
"But you have to enter Candy Mountain Candy Cave Jayfeather!" The pale gray warrior demanded. Then suddenly, a cat crawled out of the cave at the base of the mountain, and Jayfeather scented the ancient cat who visited him in dreams.
"Rock?" Jayfeather meowed in wonder. Then Rock started singing. He sang about Candy mountain and how great it was. To Jayfeather, it was very annoying.
"Alright, fine! I'll go into the freaking candy cave! This better be good!" he agreed as he walked into the cave.
"Goodbye Jayfeather!" Lionblaze called after him.
"Yeah, goodbye Jayfeather!" Dovewing meowed.
"Goodbye…" Jayfeather said, wondering why they were saying goodbye. Then a door slid over the entrance of the cave. He heard pawsteps coming towards him. "Hey. What's going on here? Hello? Who is that?" Jayfeather shouted. He received a swift blow to the head, which knocked him out.
What seemed like hours later, Jayfeather woke up back near camp. "Ow… Oh StarClan, what happened?" he meowed. Jayfeather inspected an already healing cut on his side. "Argh! They took my freaking kidney!"