Thank you Drunken Officer for reviewing on the last chapter. I'm so glad you enjoy this story and what I'm trying to do! I look forward to what you have to say next!
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Three days later...
"Sorry, I'm going to have to ask you to put those on, Kate," Ben expressed as he looked at her from where he sat across the table. The ocean was so close that he could nearly feel its salty spray on his face and he could hear the refreshing sound of the waves hitting the rocks. The beauty was lost to Benjamin, however. In that moment, all of his focus was placed on the woman sitting opposite him. The woman with the flowered sundress.
She raised a brow at the handcuffs on the table. "And if I don't?"
Ben smirked. "Then you don't get any coffee."
Kate complied and slipped the metal cuffs onto her wrists.
"Tighter," Ben ordered and he was met with a defiant look from the woman. He could tell he was angering her fast. "Please." Ben was grateful when she finally complied. He nodded his head and began to eat his eggs.
Kate did not eat, however. She just stared at him with a calculating and cold eye. "What have you done with Sawyer and Jack?"
Ben looked up, fork in the air. "Now, why Sawyer?"
"'Why Sawyer' what?"
"He's the first one you asked about," Ben answered and nibbled at his toast. "'What have you done with Sawyer and Jack?'"
Kate rolled her eyes. "You don't know me."
"Of course I don't," Ben complied and set his piece of toast down to study her. She was certainly a beautiful woman, but far too fiery for him. Far too rash and angry. And not even the least bit grateful for the view he had provided her with.
As long as Ben stared at her, Kate stared right back. She looked as if she would have crossed her arms if her wrists hadn't been cuffed. "I want my clothes back."
"We've burned them," he deadpanned and her cheeks became red with anger.
"Why did you bring me here? Why did you make me put on this dress? Why are you feeding me breakfast."
Good. Now she was asking the right questions.
Ben just smirked all the more and motioned to the view of the island's coast. "I brought you here so you'd look out at the water and feel comforted - comforted that your friends were looking out at the same ocean. I gave you the dress so that you'd feel like a lady. And I wanted you to eat your food with a real live fork and feel civilized. I did all those things so that you'd have something nice to hold on to. Because, Kate, the next two weeks are going to be very unpleasant."
If he frightened her at all, she didn't show it. "What do you mean by unpleasant?"
He chuckled. "I'm afraid you'll just have to wait and see."
Kate nodded and he wondered if she had even expected him to answer that question. "And you're the leader here?"
"You could say that," he said with a nod. "But there are higher forms of leadership than me."
She laughed bitterly. "Who knew this island would be such a democracy?"
He returned her laugh. "There is a lot about this place that you don't know."
"So..." she began and she finally decided to eat a little. After all, she was starving. And the food, though she hated to admit it, was actually really good. "I take it you didn't just crash on this island. Who are you really?"
"If I told you that, then where would be the mystery in it all?"
Kate rolled her eyes and took another bite. "Can I at least know your name? Your real name?"
He smirked. "What's in a name?" When he saw the disappointment flash in her eyes, he smiled just a bit. "But you can call me Benjamin. Benjamin Linus."
"Well, Benjamin..." she looked him dead in the eyes and grinned defiantly. "It's taking awhile to heal, huh?"
Ben instictively raised a hand to the spot above his right eye, where he knew there was still a scrape. "You have your Iraqi torturer to thank for that," he replied dryly. "But I wouldn't look so smug, Ms. Austen." He saw the look of shock on her face when he said her last name. "After we're done with you, you'll wish we were Iraqi torturers instead of the 'others', as you like to call us."
"You wouldn't dare hurt us!" She declared between clenched teeth.
"Oh, trust me," he said calmly, "Torture is not really our thing. But, may I remind you, Kate, there are worst things than the pain of the body." Ben turned to look out at the ocean and sighed. "Isn't it just one of the most beautiful things you've ever seen?"
But Kate didn't answer and he didn't expect her too. She was far too busy glaring at him with all the hate she could muster.
0o0 Flashback 0o0
A twenty-nine year old Benjamin Linus sat on the great, gargantuan surface of a cliff, looking out at the ocean below. The blue expanse stretched out as far as he could see and, were it not for the geographical lessons he had learned in school, he would have wondered if perhaps the blue went on forever and ever. Of course, Benjamin knew it didn't. But there would always be a part of him that would wonder 'what if'...What if the ocean didn't end? What if the island was the only source of land on the earth? What if they were the only humans in existence?
Ben felt a pair of eyes staring at him and he turned around to see that Richard was the newcomer, the intruder into his private thoughts. Very rarely did Ben get a chance to be so quiet, what with his new role as leader of the island. He had banished Widmore only a week ago. And good riddens. That was one man he would never ever miss, not even for a moment.
"Do you think I made the right choice?"
His voice, though quiet, was abrupt, and Richard walked up to sit down beside him. "About what?"
"About..." 'everything' was almost what he said, but he decided against it. "About Charles?"
Richard shrugged and looked out at the ocean. "You didn't have a choice. Charles sinned and went against the rules of the island. He could no longer be the leader. Jacob's decision."
Ben nodded. "I suppose," he replied thoughtfully, he was only half intent on the conversation. He licked his lips and looked at the man sitting next to him. "Do you think I make a good leader?"
"I think..." Richard replied slowly, "...That you do what you can. You're not going to be perfect at it. And-" He paused.
Ben raised a brow. "What?" His voice was hard. He could tell Richard was hesitating.
"Well," the man chuckled humorlessly, "It's no secret that this is what you've wanted for a long time."
"Are you saying I orchestrated all of this? That I planned this? Is that what you think?"
"No, I don't think that. But how can the people be assured of that?" Richard shook his head. "They watched you as a boy, Ben. Some died, others took their place. I don't think many of them trust you, if that's what you're asking."
Ben frowned. "I'm not looking for trust. I know I give no reason for people to trust me."
"Anyone in particular you're thinking of?"
"Why would you think that?" He snapped as he turned to Richard.
The man seemed unphased. "You have a far away look in your eye, as if you were asking all of these questions underneath the guise of the people, but were really asking them about a particular person." Ben was silent and just looked down at his hands. Richard frowned. "What was her name?"
"Why do you assume it was a woman?"
"Isn't it always?" Richard jested and succeeded in making Ben smirk.
It was silent as the two men sat, hearing nothing but the crashing sounds of the waves hitting the rocks below. Richard wondered if he should just get up and leave Ben to his thoughts, but, just as he was about to, it seemed the man was ready to speak again.
"I lost her, Richard," he began in his monotonous voice, void of emotion, and licked his lips. "She trusted me with her life and I let her down." He looked at Richard and his eyes were solemn but still emotionless. Ben disproved the very idea that eyes were windows into the soul. "I thought that after all this time, I would be able to forget. But how can I forget if I can't forgive myself?" Richard thought he heard a flicker of sadness in Ben's tone. "I can't forgive myself."
Richard didn't say anything because he couldn't think of anything to say. He knew Ben was never this vulnerable, and even though he was barely showing any emotion now, he knew that this was about as vulnerable as the man would ever get. He knew that Ben would not appreciate calming words of encouragement, nor would he desire a lengthy to-do-list to attain the path of forgiveness. So, he was just silent, wondering who this mystery woman could be, and what had happened to her.
"Did she die in the Purge?" Richard dared to ask.
Ben's shoulders stiffened and he turned to look at the man. In a simple voice came his simple reply.
"Yes."
0o0 Flash to Present 0o0
"You okay?"
He turned around to look at Juliet. "Since when do you care?" He knew he sounded hostile but he couldn't really bring it in himself to care.
She shrugged. "You're right. I really don't." Her voice was cold, but it didn't affect Ben really. He knew she disliked him. But then again, this was the longest conversation they had had in nearly three weeks.
"How's Jack?" Ben decided to change the subject as he focused his gaze back on the video feed of the doctor. The man was currently pacing the length of his "room", his hands on his hips, his jaw locked.
Juliet shrugged. "He's normal, considering all that's happened to him. Angry mostly."
"This should be some fun then," Ben replied, a hint of humor in his tone.
"Remember that this is the man you hope will perform the surgery. Your life depends on him." She sighed and rubbed her tired eyes. "Don't anger him any more than he already is."
He turned around. "What's that supposed to mean?" The question was posed softly enough, but he sounded curious. He leaned his back up against the desk.
She seemed unfazed by his reaction to her statement. "Nothing. Just...you tend to make more enemies than you do friends, and you anger people more often than you don't. If you do so with Dr. Shephard I can't guarantee that he will do the surgery."
"There's always an angle, Juliet. It just needs to be found and exploited. He may not do the surgery with a willing conscience, but, you mark my words, I'll find a way to convince him."
"You're a manipulative bastard, Ben," Juliet declared in a cold tone and he saw the glint of hate in her eyes. It was clear and unmistakable.
Ben rolled his eyes and shrugged. "Believe what you want."
Juliet looked as if she wanted to say something else, but instead, she decided to turn around and leave. She would've kept walking if his voice hadn't stopped her.
"Do you believe the past can come back to haunt you?"
Her brows slanted and she turned back around. "What the hell are you talking about?"
He licked his lips as he tried to explain, but he eventually gave up. "Never mind." He thought she would leave but she just continued to stare at him.
"I do think that our past wrongs have consequences. One way or another, our mistakes always catch up to us." She cocked her head. "Why do you ask?"
Ben frowned and then looked up and straight into her eyes. "No reason." Juliet just nodded.
"Do you ever regret it?"
"Regret what?"
Juliet closed her eyes and took a deep breath to steady herself. "Killing him."
"By 'him', I presume you mean Goodwin?" Juliet just nodded and Ben shrugged. "The only thing I regret about doing what I did is-" he paused and frowned, "-is that I have lost your friendship. I thought that by eradicating him, you would be mine. But in doing so, I just pushed you away even more."
"Ben, I never felt for you like that. If I ever gave you a reason to believe-"
He interrupted. "You almost kissed me."
"What?" His abrupt answer left her floundering for coherent speech.
"On the night I came to your home to apologize, after telling you to stay away from him, we-" he groaned. "Never mind."
"Ben, I was upset!" She exclaimed as she walked back into the room and slammed the door behind her. The room was so small that it left very little space to move, and they were so close they were almost touching. Her hot breath crashed into his face and he could feel her anger burning within her. "Your words had hurt me, and then you did something I never thought you would do. You came and you apologized, and you were serious. I lost myself for a moment! One moment!" She bit her lip. "And nothing happened."
"Something could've," he argued, trying to hold onto one last strand of hope of what might have been, but she coldly shook her head.
"No, Ben," she admitted, "It couldn't have."
And with that, she had reopened the door, walked outside, and slammed it hard in his face.