Figured I'd get this up since it was stuck in my head. Most of you don't know, but I'm a pretty big Ed, Edd, n Eddy fan, so I wondered what would happen if I crossed the cartoon with Jak and Daxter? This is a parody of one of my all-time favorite episodes, one+one=Ed. I've replaced all the Ed Edd n eddy characters with Jak and Daxter characters, and re-arranged the lines to better fit them. So, without further delay, I give you: one+one=Jak.

Chapter 11: 1+1= Jak

Daxter was asleep in his bed after midnight one night, when he began to hear flies buzzing around. Daxter swatted at them to go away, rolling over and opening his eyes slightly. He suddenly shot awake when he saw that Jak was lying awake in his bed.

"AH! Jak! What are you doing in my bed," Daxter yelled.

"I can't sleep Daxter," Jak responded. "I keep thinking, how can my feet smell if they don't have a nose?"

Daxter looked at him confused before saying quietly: "Jak?"

"Hm," Daxter responded.

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM," Daxter yelled, shoving Jak out of his bed with his foot, Jak falling to the ground seconds later. Daxter then went back to sleep.

"Ow...my buttocks hurts," Jak said to himself before standing up and eying Daxter's lava lamp. "Hm...why does goo float?"

"Hit the road," Daxter yelled back, opening his eyes to a disturbing sight: Jak had ate his lava lamp, his eyes looking like said decoration. "(Gasp) my lamp!"

"Daxter," Jak asked once again, picking up Daxter by his tail. "Why don't birds just take a bus south for the winter?"

Daxter pouted as Jak carried him off to wherever Jak felt like going.

(a few hours later)

The two had made their way to the kitchen of Daxter's house, where the ottsel was now using a kitchen cabinet as a bed while Jak continued asking him questions.

"Daxter, when you close the fridge door, does the little light stay on," Jak asked as he repeatedly closed and opened the door.

"GO HOME," Daxter spat as he tried to sleep again, Jak still opening and closing the door.

"Hello light...hello light...hello light...hello light...hello light..."

(Hours later)

It was now morning, and Daxter had not gotten any sleep that night. He now had a dazed, sleepy, crazy look on his face, as Jak, yes, asked him more questions.

"Daxter, carrots are good for your eyes; can it dial a phone?"

Daxter had now had enough of Jak's constant questioning, as he leaped out of his cabinet bed, clutching Jak's shirt.

"If you're going to strain your peanut brain, think of something more important," Daxter responded. "Like...how to get your face on a dollar bill!"

Jak looked at him confused before saying: "Daxter, why is someone in the kitchen with Dina?"

"Uh..." Jak responded. "Is Torn up yet?"

(Meanwhile)

Torn was currently in the garage of his house (AKA the underground), taking apart something. He pulled off some component of the item, laughing slightly.

"Heh, how embarrassing," he said. "Seems to be a 15 amp Resistor! What a thought; my, I love knowledge!"

"HEYA TORN," Daxter yelled, coming out of nowhere. Torn leaped into the air, screaming slightly, Jak catching him soon after.

"Daxter, you know I hate that," Torn yelled, then seeing he was being held by Jak. "Oh, hello Jak."

"What are you doing to this toaster, is it busted or what," Daxter said, grabbing the object and looking at it before shaking it. "Where's the toast go, anyway?"

"First of all, Daxter," Torn responded, taking the item from Daxter. "Toast doesn't go in a toaster, bread does. Second, it's actually an antique radio. I disassembled it, Daxter, in order to understand how it works."

"You're a riot, Torn," Daxter said.

"Think how if we knew everything, we would be..." Torn started, but then Daxter interrupted him.

"If we knew everything, we'd be sooo famous," Daxter said, but then struck an idea. "Wait, yeah, and RICH."

"Like potato salad," Jak asked off topic.

"Well," Torn began, but was once again cut off by Daxter.

"I see Jawbreakers," Daxter said, grabbing Torn. "Loads of them! I'd never thought I'd say this, but, let's learn!"

"That's the spirit, let's get educated," Torn responded. "Shall we begin our journey of knowledge at Jak's house?"

"We're gonna be eggheads! Rich eggheads," Daxter said as they exited towards Jak's house.

"Cluck, cluck, cluck," Jak added.

(At Jak's house)

The three had soon arrived to Jak's house, getting ready to open his garage door. When they did, however, they were stunned at the amount of things in his garage.

"Egads," Torn said.

"Garages are for zoomers, Jak," Daxter commented.

"Why thank you," Jak responded.

"Where do we begin," Torn asked.

"Oh, oh, I know, let's take this apart first," Jak said, grabbing a clothes washing machine from the pile and chucking it towards Daxter and Torn. Torn shrieked slightly as the appliance landed on Daxter.

"Uh...Dax..." Torn asked.

"Look at what I found," Jak said, mysteriously busting out of the side of the washing machine holding Daxter. "One Daxter, and a whole bunch of doohickeys! I took it apart, Torn! Am I smart now?"

"Yes, well, let's not ask for miracles, Jak," Torn responded, jotting down some notes as he examined the parts.

"You're enjoying this, aren't ya," Daxter asked.

"Oh, and what's this," Jak asked, holding a part from the machine in his hand.

"Spin it, Jak, and learn," Torn responded, as Jak spun the device. His tongue got caught in the spinner and soon his face became wrapped around the cone.

"It's a face scruncher, cool," Jak said.

"Let's see what makes this old dresser tick," Daxter said as he pulled on a piece of fabric, a bra soon emerging from the dresser. "WHOHOO! PG13..."

"That's my mom's, Dax," Jak said. Daxter suddenly dropped the bra in horror.

"eeeaugh," Daxter said, Torn laughing at this.

"I haven't learned a thing," Daxter responded, Jumping on top of Torn's head. " Come on, let's go find some more stuff!"

"Daxter, must you be so rough," Torn asked.

"Is it my turn to jump on your head," Jak asked.

"Let's just...follow Daxter, Jak," Torn responded, leaving.

"Follow the leader," Jak yelled, leaping off-screen and presumably onto the other two as pain noises were heard.

(Later)

In Spargus, Damas was busy tending to his garden in the backyard of the palace, currently cleaning out his chicken coop.

"Not again," he said, pulling his pet pig Kliever out of the box. "How many times must Damas purge himself? No strange visitors, ever!"

Damas then carried his pig over to another end of the farm, to a mound of manure.

"Do not burn he candle at both ends, as it leads to the life of a hairdresser," He said as he set Kliever down on the pile.

"The plywood of this coop has some unusual characteristics," Torn, who had just now showed up at Damas's palace, said as the three had taken apart Damas's chicken coop somehow.

"Wow, wood," Daxter said, holding a piece of the coop.

"What is the meaning of this," Damas yelled as he came up to them.

"We're trying to solve the mysteries of life," Torn responded.

"This reminds Damas of a fable from his own country," Damas responded.

"Here we go," Daxter commented as Damas walked up to a nearby tree.

"The story of the ugly boy and the tree of heads!"

"Well, it's been swell, Damas, but we're out of here," Daxter said as he began to walk away.

"Life too short not to smell the parsley," Damas said, stopping Daxter and grouping the four around the tree. "OK; once there was an ugly boy who ran away from his village, and hit his melon on a tree! The boy looked up to see the beautiful heads growing from the tree," Damas continued.

"Handsome," Jak said.

"After many tries," Damas said, putting a fruit on his head and pulling it off, his head disappearing.

"What the..." Daxter began, but then Damas's head popped out.

"He found one that fit, and ran back to the village! Then, he became very popular!"

"Oh, I want a new head Damas," Jak said, grabbing the tree. "Please, Damas? Head for Jak!"

Jak suddenly uprooted the tree, and when he turned the tree over, it suddenly became flat.

"What a discovery," Torn said, coming over to the tree. "It's flat as cardboard!"

"Give me that," Daxter yelled as he dragged the tree over to him, but it soon fell onto him.

"Heavy in weight, got it," Torn commented. "Thank you, Daxter."

Daxter was able to break out of the tree trunk and ran up the length of it, stopping at what would have been the leaves, but was now just flat wood."You guys gotta see...this," Daxter began as he looked ove the tree, but stopped when it began to fall, taking him in the process.

"I best tend to his medical needs! Excuse me," Torn said, running after Daxter.

"My turn to jump on his head," Jak said, running after Torn.

"Life has many doors, you three," Damas yelled as they ran away.

(Meanwhile)

"Whoa...big...treee...flat," Daxter mumbled as he stumbled away from the scene, suddenly tripping over a house somehow. Daxter jiggled the chimney of the house, saying: "Einstein's got nothin' on this!"

"What a discovery, I'm speechless," Torn said. "I mean, this is a (don't know what the word is he says), the displacement of perspective..."

"I thought your were speechless," Daxter asked.

"Look at me run," Jak said as he ran aimlessly, then tripped and somehow slid under the street pavement. "Home free!"

"The pavement has adapted fabric-like qualities," Torn said excitedly. "Interesting!"

"He'll never find his way out," Daxter said with a laugh, as he stood on the house he had tripped over earlier. The house then suddenly collapsed under his weight. "I say we take a break, this learnin' stuff's making me hungry," he continued, raising his hand at the end of his sentence. His hand actually somehow hit the sun without burning him.

"Did you see that? Weird," Daxter said, checking again to make sure he wasn't seeing things. "Oh well, if you can't beat 'em, eat 'em!" Daxter then grabbed the sun from the sky and took a bite out of it. "Mm...not bad!"

"Jumpin' Jehoshaphat," Vin, who had been wandering around Spargus the past few hours for no real reason, exclaimed, shivering frantically. "Who turned out the sun!"

"Hiya Vin," Jak said out of the blue, scaring the foreman so bad he fainted.

"Lighten up, shrimp," Daxter said as he pulled Vin out of this spell. "We're just figuring out how stuff works." Daxter then eyed a thread protruding from Vin's shirt. He began to pull it, and it unraveled Vin's shirt, but then seemed to be lodged into Vin himself. Daxter then yanked at the thread, and Vin's whole entire outline was pulled right off him.

"Is that Vin's outline," Torn asked with a grin.

"You betcha," Daxter said. "Let's sell it back to him!"

"Fate has dealt a cruel hand," Vin monologued as his liquid form slid into a nearby drain. "Darn it!"

Daxter began playing with Vin's outline as Torn said: "Uh, Dax, you'd best not aggravate it..."

"Like my new hairdo, Torn," Daxter said as he posed with a hairstyle he made with Vin's outline.

"It suits you, Dax...JAK," Torn spat.

"This is fun," Jak said as he sawed a hole in the sky; however, he soon revealed Seem, Rayn, and Ashelin bathing inside of the hole.

"Big Jak, scrub my feet," Seem said as she held out a scrub brush. The girls laughed as Jak somehow shoved the hole away, Daxter walking over with a giggle seconds later.

"Did you see anything," he asked before stepping over where the sky had fell, creating a hole. "What the..." Daxter said before falling into the hole.

"Uh, Dax," Jak said as Daxter fell back into the screen, but just fell back into the hole again. "Dax," Jak asked again as Daxter fell from the same place again. "My turn!"

Jak then picked up the hole as Daxter fell but landed on the ground with a thud, Jak sticking his head into the hole and having it pop back out above them. "Look at me!"

"Jak, you seem to have stumbled into another dimension," Torn said, writing down more notes. "I feel we're getting closer to answering that all important question!"

"Is Daxter rich yet," Daxter said slyly.

"Can Jak go to the bathroom," Jak said, grabbing onto the hole as it condensed into a long snake.

"JAK," Keira yelled, popping out of the hole.

"Keira," Jak asked confused.

"Keira," Torn said also confused, writing more notes.

"Wait'll I tell daddy what you did to Vin," Keira said, holding a pitcher with Vin's liquid form inside it.

"Don't spill me," Vin said.

"Oh, what a shame, you have to go? So soon," Daxter responded, grabbing Keira and hoisting her up. He then ran in place, getting some kind of foot vortex going, and dropped Keira into it.

"Daxter, you blockhead," Keira yelled as Daxter let her go, Keira speeding off into the distance.

"We could very well be the next cover story of 'intellectual discoveries magazine'," Torn said happily.

"Good thing you're housebroken," Daxter commented as Torn looked up into the sky with an uneasy look on his face.

"Don't look now, but there's a cow...hovering just overhead..." He said, and indeed Damas's cow was floating in the sky, along with several other things. "I feel uncomfortable...pardon me," Torn finished, excusing himself from the three and running down a long, weird pathway.

"Hold the elevator, Torn," Daxter said, leaving shortly after.

"Jak," both of them yelled as the blond was still standing there. He then ran crazily up to them, yelling: "Am I it?"

"Torn, we've learned into fortune," Daxter said.

"Don't let the excitement spoil your grammar, Dax," Torn responded.

"Look around; we've gotta be rich..."Daxter said.

"EVERYTHING'S BROKEN! FIX IT NOW!"

Keira had suddenly popped back out of a dollhouse floating in the background, yelling into Daxter's ear.

"Shut your mouth Keira," Daxter responded. "Or better yet, get rid of it!"

Daxter then yanked off Keira's mouth, Keira looking shocked. "I love taking things apart," he commented, but then Keira's mouth somehow bit Daxter and latched onto his cheek. "Get her off, Torn," Daxter yelled.

"Not a chance," Torn said, giggling.

"Keira," Daxter yelled as the scene began warping again, the path moving up and down.

"Hm, an original scene transition, interesting," Torn said, as everything went black. Their eyes soon showed up, but nothing else. "Did you eat the sun again, Daxter," Torn asked.

"Can you guess what I'm doing," Jak asked.

"Get off my foot, Jak," Daxter commented.

"I think we're moving, Daxter," Torn responded, as it was revealed that they were inside Erol's eye.

"I can hear dorks, but I can't see dorks," he said as he drove around in loops. "Come on out and show yourselves!"

The smoke from his bike soon took up the whole screen and cleared out seconds later, showing another strange background, this time Jak was sitting in a hovering chair in front of a cloud.

"Mm, cotton gravy," Jak said as he went to take a bite of the cloud.

"Careful Jak, you don't know where that's been," Torn responded.

"Oh, it's right here, Torn," Jak said. There was then a sudden horse noise as the two turned and saw Sig...or, what they thought was Sig, in a lage backpack, his poopsie bear becoming his head and he carried his own head in his hand.

"Tally ho, me and poopsie are gonna rough it in the woods," Sig said, as he moved along.

"This is not good," Torn said as Tess, or, some weird lizard-like version of Tess, soon showed up after.

"Care to join us, Torn," she asked. Torn just mumbled.

"Was that Tess," Daxter asked, as they suddenly turned sideways.

"You realize we're floating, don't you," Torn said. The two then suddenly dropped to the ground, as Damas then suddenly opened the background and walked out.

"Hello, everyone," Damas said. He suddenly then grew two more heads. "Many doors, yes?" "Two much for," the second head said. "Couch potatoes like yourselves," the third head said.

"A three-headed damas...yawn," Daxter commented. Jak was then seen somehow blowing into the cloud from before like a balloon, inflating it and floating away.

"Fly butterfly, fly," he said.

"Jak, what are you doing," Daxter asked as he flew by them.

"The story is not yet over," Damas said.

"Oh Jak, please," Torn said as he grabbed hold of Jak.

"I gotcha," Daxter said, grabbing Torn. Damas groaned as the two floated upwards.

"How's he put on a hat," Daxter asked. "Are we rich yet, Torn?"

"It's all becoming very complicated, Dax," Torn said as Daxter crawled up to him.

"What are you talking about? All we have to do is ready your notes! And we'll be up to our necks in jawbreakers!"

"I love chickens, eddy," Jak said, as the cloud floated up to a sharp pencil, and popped. The three then fell, Torn's notepad flying up and all the notes falling in sheets as the three landed roughly on the ground below.

"My notes," Torn yelled as they drifted downwards. However, it was all revealed to be a hallucination, as they had ended up in the alley, Keira, Tess, Erol, Damas, Vin, and Sig all staring at them. The three continued to scoop up Torn's notes, as Erol said: "What are you dorks doing?"

"Uh...nothing," Jak, Torn, and Daxter said in unison.

"Right, except for being..." Erol began.

"Dorks," Keira finished for him.

"Yeah..."

"Can't we all just get along," Vin said, who was sitting in a red wagon.

"Vin, buddy, you got your line back," Jak said happily as he came up and began moving Vin around. "Is it on wrong?"

"Jak, leave Vin alone," Keira yelled as she picked Jak up and placed him to the side of her.

"Baby sister, take your mouth off again," Jak said, yanking and Keira's mouth.

"I think Jak's lost it," Damas muttered.

There was then a loud 'thunk', as Jak slid over to Torn and Daxter, saying: "Keira's mad."

"OOAAAAAAGGGHHH!" Keira yelled frantically.

"Run for it," Daxter yelled as the three ran for dear life. Daxter and Torn dove into a manhole as Keira approached them faster and faster.

"Wait'll I get my hands on you," Keira yelled.

"It's OK, guys, I'll just pick up the hole," Jak said, still thinking he was in crazy world.

"This is unsanitary," Torn spat as Jak somehow pulled the whole entire pipe out from the ground, running with it.

"JAAAAAAAK," Daxter and Torn yelled as Jak continued to run away from Keira...

I think I did a good job with this. This should be good for a while until I get another update out of me. Review.