I fell back to sleep after that little conversation with Atticus. I didn't dream but it was still a satifying night's sleep. I woke up with a feeling of peace I hadn't had in a while; the kind you only can get from waking up with yourself. I walked over to my window and looked to see what kind of bird was cooing outside. I smiled when I realized it was a cardinal and began to wonder if it was the same one that swooped down on me in the woods yesterday. Keeping in spirit with the backroads, country superstition, I decided to say a prayer for my brother for the bird to deliver to him.

"Jem," I whispered at the bird. "It's Scout. I pray that you're in heaven with mama and watching over us. I love you and tell mama I love her, too."

I watched in awe as the bird circled around my window, looked right at me and tweeted. It was then that a blue jay came by and the cardinal flew with him to wherever he was going. No wonder my Grandaddy Finch told Atticus that he could shoot all the blue jays he wanted if he could hit him! What a bunch of jerks those blue jays are!

"Jean Louise," Aunty knocked on my door.

"Come on in, Aunty," I said as I stood up straight and crossed my arms. Defense mode.

"Jean Louise," Aunty repeated as she walked into my room. She scoffed at my appearance and I looked down to realize I wasn't wearing any underwear to cover my bottom half with. Oops. "Darling, I was thinking and, you do have something decent to wear today right?"

"Yes," I said, trying to remain calm. "I have a dress."

"What color is it?"

Red as the blood that no longer runs in Jem's veins.

"It's white and so are the flats I've chosen to wear."

"Sounds more like wedding attire than funeral attire."

Wedding. I've decided I've never hated a word more than I hated that one.

"It's the best that I could do. I don't think Jem would want me to wear black, anyway."

"Is that really what you think?"

"That is what I think. I think I could go dressed up in all the colors of the rainbow and he would smile."

"I wouldn't smile," Aunty said as she sharply exited my room.

Surprise, surprise. I really will wear a red dress to your funeral just to piss you off if you keep it up, Aunty!

But I can't say that so I just go over to my suitcase that's been lying on the floor ever since I've got here and I pick up the emsemble for this horrible day. A normal pair of fruit of the looms, a white lace bra, nude pantyhose, and my white dress. I looked in the mirror and decided I looked pretty okay. I noticed Hank staring at me in the mirror and I felt kind of good knowing he was watching me.

"Do you like what you see?" I asked him as I turned around and walked over to him.

"Sure I do," he said as he hugged my waist and kissed me. "You look like a bride."

I couldn't help but laugh when he said that. I thought of my dream or my memory or whatever I had last night. Hank shot me a look of confusion which made me laugh even harder.

"Remember that one time when we played wedding and it was our first and last time we did so?"

"No."

A shiver ran through me when he answered with his emotionless, stoic no. My dream last night that I could have swore happened and Atticus pretty much confirmed did happen and Hank is telling me he doesn't remember it? He was my groom for God's sake. I wanted to ask him if he remembered since Dill kissed me before he could but I thought the better of it. I'm beginning to wonder if he does remember but won't tell me so. I wouldn't put it past him to be crazy like that. He was studying me again and I was waiting for him to say something.

"Did you bring a camisole?" He finally asked.

"What?" I asked as I looked down at the neckline of my dress. "No. Why would I? I'm hardly showing, Hank."

"Ladies don't show their cleavage at funerals," he said as he ran his finger down in between my breasts.

"I think I look nice," I said, cold as ice. I don't care who the hell he was to me, I did not want him touching me like that with such a condenscending manner.

"I think you do, too."

"Then why did you say that?"

"We're going to be married and you're going to be a lady in Maycomb. I just don't want people to get the wrong idea of you once we do get to that point."

"Well, I'm still Jean Louise Finch, remember that."

"You tell him, honey!"

"Atticus?"

I gasped out loud when I said his name. How long has he been listening to our conversation? Was he watching us, too? The way he came around the corner made me think that yes, he could have. I wondered what he was going to do but he just looked at me, smiled and gave me a hug.

"You look wonderful today," he said as he squeezed me as tight as he could. It felt good.

"So do you," I told him as I kissed his cheek.

"That's a really great tux, sir," Hank said as he patted Atticus' shoulder.

"And as for you," Atticus said with his lawyer voice. I began to tremble. "You can stay home today."

"I beg your pardon, sir?" Hank asked, shocked.

"I know Jem was your friend but he was my son and he was Jean Louise's brother. You not respecting my daughter means you have no respect for her brother, either. You will stay home today."

"I love her, though."

"No you don't; you love the power you have over her or the power you think you have."

"You don't undertstand..."

"Oh, but I do! I do. You couldn't make it anymore apparent than when Dill came to town. You couldn't stand the fact that my daughter had another man in her space."

"Here," I said as I took off my engagement ring and handed it to Hank. "I don't want it."

I might as well have slapped him across the face but I had to do it. I had no right saying yes to him in the first place. A part of me couldn't help but feel sorry for him, though. There was a lot of history between us and I was sorry it was all going to come to an end on such a sour note. I didn't want to hurt him even though he did hurt me.

"I still love you, Hank," I told him with tears already running down my cheeks. "I just don't think it's a good idea we get married is all."

"You had to wait until daddy came to save you to say that to me?"

"That's enough," Atticus said, trying to remain calm.

"You had to wait until my brother died to ask me to marry you?"

"I thought his death would soften you."

"Henry," Atticus said with a huff. I had all I could do not to pee my pants with what Hank just said. "I do not want you at my son's funeral. I want you to pack your bags and leave my house. Tomorrow I want you to go to the office before it opens and pack your stuff and get out of there. Don't do anything stupid because if I come home or to work to find it vandalized the police will be notified."

"Yes, sir," Hank said as he turned on his heels and walked away.

I could only stand there in stunned silence as Atticus looked at me. He couldn't find any words to say, either. That was when I heard a bird chirp and I looked out to see my cardinal looking in my window. Atticus turned his head to look to and he drew a breath.

"I'll be," he whispered.

"Forget mockingbirds," I said. "I think cardinals are my new favorite."

Atticus looked at me with amazement only to smile at me. I began to laugh as he rubbed my head. Oh, who cares if I still needed my daddy sometimes?