Chapter Eleven: I'm Gonna Show You Tonight

(Disclaimer: I wish I were Shore. But I'm not. Here's your disclaimer)

Realizing that he was going to be spending the night alone for the first time in some time, House called Wilson as soon as he arrived home, hoping that his friend wouldn't be too busy with his own life to hang out with him. Then again, even if he was too busy, House would still expect him to drop everything and come over because even the feminine Wilson needed some guy time. The feminine Wilson ESPECIALLY needed guy time.

Wilson, who was walking out of his kitchen to give Steph some tea, groaned slightly when his phone started to buzz in his pocket. Knowing that it could only be his mother or House, as his girlfriend was right in front of him, he tried to figure out which could be the lesser of two evils before looking at the Caller ID and seeing Greg House on the screen. He handed the tea to Stephanie and flipped the phone open, "Hello, Greg."

"Wilson, you should come over." House replied quickly, settling himself onto the couch with a beer and the remote to the TV. "I'm bored and I assume you have no life, together we can do something great."

Wilson sighed as he settles down beside Steph on his--or rather their couch, "I have a life, House."

"Yes, we all have a life if you want to get technical, but yours isn't exciting so you should come over. I have beer and Monster Trucks on TV."

Wilson realized that he had been neglecting his friend for his lovely girlfriend, but also knew that if it weren't for her, House would be neglecting him for sex with Cuddy. Either way, he did miss his best friend, and he nodded, "Okay. I'll bring a pizza."

"I knew you missed me. Tell Jungle Bunny I said hi." He hung up immediately, fully prepared to go out and grab some more beer before Wilson came over.

"How did-" he looked thoroughly confused at his phone wondering how in the hell he knew Steph was with him. She hadn't said a thing.

Steph looked over at Wilson with a smirk and sipped her tea, "Running off with the boys?"

He smiled softly at her, a little embarrassed at his inability to say no, "Yes...House's forty something years of age is actually more like six eight year old boys. So I am going to be off with the boys." He leaned in and kissed her tenderly, "Is that okay?"

"Of course it's ok," She laughed sweetly. "I was starting to think you didn't have friends because of how much time you were spending with me. Go have fun... and try to save some pizza for me."

Wilson smiled at her like a goofball, wondering how on earth he got someone as sexy, charming, beautiful, and funny as Stephanie Perry. "I can't help it if you're so much fun to be around. I'll save you a couple beers too."

"Ugh, you're an angel." She smirked at him and gave him one last, lingering kiss. "I'll see you later."

Almost an hour later, Wilson let himself into House's apartment with his own key to the place, pizza in hand. "So to what do I owe this, as of late, rare occasion of us hanging out?"

"To me not having anything to do tonight." He looked over at his friend and eyed the pizza in his hands carefully. "By anything I mean Cuddy."

"I figured as much. Why the sudden change of plans?" He set the pizza down on the coffee table and walked into House's kitchen to help himself to a beer.

"I... think she might be upset with me." House replied, grabbing a slice of pizza from the box. "Doesn't like that I was messing with her friend or something."

"Which friend would that be?" He walked back into the main room, sipping at one of the cheap beers House bought.

"Peter Piper or whatever his name is. Came in the other day with a sick kid. She's fun. Has short term memory loss, you really should go talk to her."

"Peter....Bradford?" Wilson asked surprised. "His daughter's in the hospital?"

"Yeah, sounds right." He nodded, sipping at his third beer of the night. "Know him?"

"I-- well...I know of him. I went with Cuddy to Emily's funeral...they're good friends from Michigan."

"Oh... How unfortunate. Michigan Alumni." House rolled his eyes and turned the volume up on the Monster Trucks. "Twenty on Wild Thing."

Wilson appeared a bit put off by House's flippant attitude, "Wait. Cuddy blew off sex with you...because you acted like yourself around a patient's family. And you don't care why its suddenly a problem now?"

"Should I care? Or are you trying to distract me because you know Anderson is going to get owned?"

"I'm just saying...it seems like something you'd normally be looking into. I obviously know something about Peter and Cuddy...and yet you're not grilling me. So either you really don't care, or you really care a lot and you don't want it to seem like you do."

"Or I figure you went with Cuddy to Peter's wife's funeral because you were her doctor." House sighed and looked over at him. "I'm not an idiot, I did a patient history. Her mom died of multiple inoperable tumors in her brain. Your specialty."

He started to turn back to the rally but shot Wilson another look, "That is what you mean, right? By what you know? Or do you know something else?"

Wilson looked like a deer caught in headlights wondering why on earth he got himself in this situation. "Umm...right," he grabbed a piece of pizza in an effort to shut his mouth.

"I'm unimpressed. What do you know."

"It shouldn't matter since your thing with Cuddy is purely sex."

"Oh no-no-no, you can't do that." He replied, his attention now purely focused on Wilson. "You can't keep shit from me Wilson, and it has nothing to do with my sexual escapades with Captain Cuddles. Come on, I want to know what's up with Bradford."

Wilson sighs, "I just...know that in college, Peter and she were...very close."

"Like between her legs close or like she thought he was gay and they went shopping together close? Cause seriously, kid or no kid, he gave off some pretty interesting vibes, let me tell you."

"More like Peter wanted to be in between her legs but Cuddy was still hung up over you. They were very good friends though. Which is why he had Emily come to her hospital. And now, his daughter, apparently."

House smiled smugly at the idea of Cuddy rejecting the seemingly good natured push over due to him and nodded, "Oh. That's fun. Shame for him though, everyone deserves great sex once in awhile."

"Well...if Cuddy's blowing you off for him...maybe that's what he's working on."

"Think not. His kid can hardly remember her own name, I doubt hitting the sack with Cuddy is at the top of his priorities, especially if he is the type of guy he seems to be."

Wilson shrugged, "You never know with some guys. Especially when it comes to the type who tend to go for Cuddy."

"The type with eyes?" House raised an eyebrow and looked over at his friend. "Plus his wife just died, I'm pretty sure Cuddy fucks aren't what he's after right now. Plus, even if he is, who cares? Cuddy's reaction to his come ons would likely be similar to the last time he tried to get into her tight skirts."

His friend shrugged again, "Well I'm sure that you have plenty of reason to be confident about it. More so than I would be aware about."

"Right..." House said absently. Should he be worried about Cuddy and the over sized teddy bear? Wilson's tone wasn't exactly reassuring... "What's up with you and the dark one?"

Wilson cast a glance at House, knowing that he had to tell him sooner or later because he'd just find out anyway. He sighed softly, "She's living with me."

"Wow, so much for not moving too fast." He said, picking up another beer and popping it open. "How long have you been dating?"

"Four months next week," he cleared his throat.

"Wow, already?" House thought about the math and turned to Wilson, "I've been sleeping with Cuddy for over a month?"

"Yeah..."

"And no one has stopped me?"

"What's to stop? It's good for you. Good for her." Wilson paused as he finished his beer, "Seems like this case might stop you though."

"You know, saying shit like that is unnerving, just tell me flat out if Cuddy is fucking that douche bag or not, would you?"

"I don't know!" Wilson looked over at his friend, trying to read him, "Why would it be unnerving anyway? Would it matter if she broke up with you for a normal relationship?"

"N-" he paused as he thought about his answers, "Yes...yes it would."

"Why is that? Because you have feelings for her?"

"N-no. Because... I wouldn't be having sex. Obviously."

"Not like you weren't having sex before. So you just have to pay for it again. Or you could always...you know...date. I'm sure someone finds you charming."

House rolled his eyes and sipped at his beer. "I don't want to date. Or pay for sex."

"So you want Cuddy?"

"Sure." He shrugged. "Why stop a good thing?"

"Maybe because both of you aren't addressing the fact that you like each other. You're always picking on each other. Like 10 year olds with crushes."

"And why would we stop that? It's working how it is."

Wilson shook his head and focused on the TV again, "One of you is going to get hurt...or both. You're not treating this like a normal relationship."

"It's not a relationship!" He sighed, turning to Wilson. "Have either of expressed wanting more?"

"You have expressed wanting more simply by saying that you don't want to sleep with anyone else."

"There's no one else to sleep with! That's unfair."

Wilson scoffed and nodded, placating his friend, "Yeah."

"I no longer wish to discuss this, you have simply been distracting me. Look, the rally is almost over and Grave Digger is out. I could have had twenty bucks."

Wilson rolled his eyes, "I'll give you the twenty."

"Don't want it." He sighed, leaning back into the couch and remaining relatively quiet for the rest of the evening, all the while swirling thoughts of himself and Cuddy around in his head.

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A/N: House isn't fooling ANYBODY. : D